Crumbling, if it weren't for Zhou Yu supporting me, I might have fainted on the spot.

I was speechless, it was Zhou Yu who stepped forward to negotiate with the police and medical staff, and then we got into the ambulance with us. In the cramped compartment, I watched as various instruments were used on my father, but he never opened his eyes again. Before arriving at the hospital, the doctor announced that the injured person was dead.

My eyes rolled and I lost consciousness.

In fact, the syncope was not long, and when I woke up soon, I was lying on the hospital bed, and Zhou Yu was talking on the phone outside the door.

As soon as I lifted the quilt and got off the ground, he saw it, and immediately hung up the phone and ran in, "Are you awake?" I grabbed his arm, "Where's my dad?" His dark eyes were gloomy and full of melancholy: "You just woke up ......"

"That's my dad!" I cried out, "Where is he?" ”

Zhou Yu took me to a morgue.

When I entered the door, I saw my mother lying there, and the head of the person on her body had been covered with a white cloth. Mom's body was trembling, and a painful and irrepressible cry came out of her throat thin and sharp.

Walking up to me, I whispered, "Mom." ”

Mom's body shook, and she raised her head from her stomach, her eyes were red, and the sorrow under her eyes could not be hidden.

I couldn't comfort myself because I couldn't control my emotions.

As soon as I stretched out my hand, I pulled the white cloth down, revealing my father's pale face.

The blood on the original face was wiped away, leaving a few bloody cuts, which were so dazzling that they hurt. In the past few years, my father has paid a lot of attention to his image, and he is neatly dressed when he goes out, and occasionally a few white hairs are specially dyed black.

But now it'......

As soon as he lowered his eyes, hot tears slipped down.

It was my mother's sentence of "cry" that made me finally cry, crying until I choked and still couldn't stop.

It turned out that tears could not vent the sorrow in their hearts at all, but when they precipitated, they formed a sea in their hearts.

Doing the funeral and buying the cemetery were all done by me and my mother, without Zhou Yu.

On that day, I bowed deeply to Zhou Yu: Please leave.

It's not that I'm angry, it's that I don't have much energy to take care of other things, I just want to send my dad away quietly.

During the first seven days, I didn't go anywhere at home.

Because she felt that her mother's mood was wrong, she set up the original bedroom as a house for her father's spirit card. I stay in it almost day and night, and I don't even have anything to eat.

I was afraid, afraid that my father would leave and my mother would go with me. So I had to watch over her at home.

It wasn't until the first seven years that my mother came out of the room, and the whole person was much thinner than before. After finding out that I didn't go out all day, she calmly said to me: Xiaoru, your father is gone, and we still have to live our lives.

I went to find Zhou Yu, I could have called, but his phone was turned off.

I naturally know his family, and he has taken me there several times. It was Zhou Yu's second brother Zhou Liang who opened the door, he glanced at me and asked me what was the matter, and I said to find Zhou Yu. He threw me a sentence: The third child is not here.

At this time, someone came out of it and asked in a low voice, "Who is coming?" ”

Zhou Liang shrugged, got out of the way of the place by the door and walked in.

I saw Zhou Yu's mother.

was originally a neighbor, so it was impossible not to know his mother, but there were not many opportunities to see him in his impression, and he only bumped into Zhou Liang or Zhou Nian a few times when he came over. He was probably busy doing business with his father and was rarely at home.

I called "Auntie" and she politely smiled and invited me in.

I really didn't see Zhou Yu indoors, so I was distracted, but Zhou's mother asked my aunt to make me tea, so I had to sit down.

Mother Zhou's tone was very gentle when she spoke to me: "Xiaoru, I heard about your family, originally I was going to go over with Lao Zhou, but I really couldn't pull away." She sighed, with more emotion in her eyes: "I remember that Xiao Yu often ran to your house when he was a child, and Lao Jia and your mother didn't treat him as an outsider, so I didn't want to be a person in a blink of an eye." ”

I didn't know what to do, so I had to keep my fingers together and be silent.

I heard Zhou's mother say again: "If there is anything at home that needs help, just talk to your aunt." ”

I glanced up at her quickly, not quite understanding what she meant.

My father is gone, and my mother and I are left at home, except for loneliness and sadness, there are no other difficulties that need help.

At this time, Zhou Liang walked out of the room and threw a sentence coldly: "If you have something to say, tell people directly, why bother to beat around the bush?" ”

Zhou's mother lightly quenched: "This child." ”

Turning to look at it, I don't know if it was my illusion, there was more coolness in those gentle eyes.

"Xiao Ru, Auntie also told you the truth, Xiao Yu is now being escorted abroad by his father, and he will not return to China for the time being."

I asked, "Why?" ”

"He's clamoring at home to marry you."

Tie the knot? I was so unfamiliar with the word that my eyes widened in a daze.

Later, when he left his house, all that circled in his mind were Zhou's mother's words. She said, Zhou Yu hasn't even graduated from college, and I'm still studying, so it's too early to talk about marriage; She also said, "What happened in my family is very regrettable.

Zhou's mother is a reserved person.

That's the conclusion I came to after I figured it out.

I went back to school, and at the end of the semester, I had to prepare for exams again. This winter in Beijing was extremely cold, and I stayed up day by day until I returned to City A after the exam, and I didn't see Zhou Yu appear.

There was a big event during the winter break, and our house was going to be demolished. In fact, the demolition plan started two years ago, the dimensions of the homes have been measured, and the resettlement apartments have been built, just waiting for someone to move in.

My mother and I borrowed a tricycle and moved our things into the new house, which was a three-bedroom house. My mother and I have one each, and my mother has set up a room for my father's spiritual seat.

Finally settled down before the year, and my mother also transferred to the neighborhood committee, so she didn't have to go too far to work.

It was Chinese New Year's Eve, and I walked back to my hometown. I saw a row of old houses being pushed down by a forklift, including my family and Zhou's family. Scenes of the past flashed in front of me, but they gradually dissipated in the noise of dust.

Could it be that after the old house was gone, my last contact with Zhou Yu was gone?

The year was spent in silence, and I stayed at home until the first month and a half before going to school.

It was still very cold in Beijing in early spring, and I wore a long cotton jacket to cover my head and face, and I felt that the wind was blowing and making people shiver.

I came back from evening self-study with a book in my arms, and when I walked downstairs to the dormitory, I glanced at it casually, and there seemed to be a figure in the dark. As soon as I walked into the dormitory door, I heard a soft call: "Jia Xiaoru." ”

He stiffened and slowly turned around.

The figure walked from the darkness to the street lamp, and Qingjun's face was revealed.

He walked over and locked his gaze on my face, "Are you okay?" ”

Three months and five days, he came back and asked me if I was okay.

I replied: It's fine.

His lips moved, and he wanted to say something, but he stopped talking.

I didn't look away, and said softly, "If you're okay, I'll go in first." ”

With a tightening of his hand, he reached out and grabbed me, "I'm sorry." ”

Why do you want to apologize to me? Did you do something wrong?

I thought about it, but I asked, "Where have you been all this time?" ”

Obviously, I felt that the palm holding me trembled slightly, and I only heard him reply: "I was escorted abroad by my father, and I wanted to call you, but my mobile phone was confiscated, and I let the eldest of my family look at me." Later, after a long time, I thought that I was going to come back, and I couldn't tell it on the phone, so I'll tell you in person. ”

After a pause, I spat out a single word: "Oh." ”

"Why are you reacting so calmly?"

Is it calm? So what should I be reacting to? Hold him and cry bitterly, confiding in him the pain and despair accumulated during this time? But Zhou Gongjin, don't you think that after three months and five days of separation, you and I are divided?

He can't see through the reading in his heart, and I don't want to pour it out.

In the end, he only said indifferently: "It's not early, it's cold at night, let's talk about it tomorrow." ”

Pulling his hand out of his hand, he walked past him to the dormitory.

I could feel the gaze behind me glued to my back until I walked into the dormitory. The mobile phone in his pocket was vibrating, and when he took it out, he saw that it was his text message - Jia Xiaoru, are you blaming me?

I typed a line and deleted it, typed and deleted it, and finally I only got two words back - no.

I woke up the next day with a little stuffy nose, I was afraid that I was frozen in the wind last night, so I found two pills to swallow and went downstairs to class with Lili. But when I walked out of the dormitory, I saw Zhou Yu standing there again.

Lili winked at me, pressed her ear and asked, "Do you want me to name you?" ”

I thought about it for a moment, smiled at her and said, "You can help me ask for leave." ”

Lili made a clear expression and left me to go to class alone.

I walked up to Zhou Yu and took the initiative to ask, "Where to sit or walk?" ”

"Do you want to drink?"

I nodded, walked out the back door of the school and into a coffee shop. When the waiter came to introduce him, Zhou Yu said that it was only a pot of tea, but I ordered a cup of Blue Mountain coffee. Disapproval flashed in his eyes, and when the waiter took the order and left, he said that the coffee was not good.

I smiled, it doesn't matter if I drink it once.

He didn't object any further.

When the coffee was served, I took a sip first, it was bitter and tasted average.

When I put down the cup, I looked up and found Zhou Yu looking at me.

Neither of them spoke, just looked at each other quietly. In the end, Zhou Yu broke the silence first: "Why don't you speak?" "I held the cup in both hands, the nails of my thumb digging into the flesh, but my face was calm.

What has been brewing in my heart for a long time, when I really want to say it, it is still very difficult, but after all, I still can't grind it.

I lowered my eyes and whispered, "Zhou Gongjin, let's break up." ”

The figure on the other side seemed to be shaken in the afterglow, and an incredulous inquiry came: "What did you say?" ”

I repeated: "Zhou Gongjin, let's break up." ”

"Jia Xiaoru, are you kidding me?"

I raised my eyes, fixed on those frightened eyes, and said in a firm tone: "I'm not joking with you, I'm serious about telling you about it." I wondered if there was a way out between us, but if Wei Lai hadn't come to you on Christmas Eve, if he hadn't changed assistants temporarily, this tragedy wouldn't have happened. ”

Zhou Yu's eyes shrank, and a thick pain appeared in them, "Are you blaming me?" ”

I nodded and acknowledged, "Blame." "I blame myself even more, if I hadn't gone to you at the time, but had accompanied my dad in the theater and walked with me later, the car accident might not have happened.

"But," he said bitterly, "it was an accident." Jia Xiaoru, you can't sentence me to death like this, Wei Lai is looking for me because ......"

I cut him off: "You don't have to tell me why she's looking for you, and I don't want to know." Because of her absence, the assistant was temporarily changed, and the assistant was not familiar with the operation, and my dad fell off the high stage during the performance. ”

From his look of amazement, it was clear that he did not know about it.

I smiled bitterly and continued: "Zhou Gongjin, do you understand? I can't go any further with you. It's been more than three months, as soon as I close my eyes, my father is lying in the blood, not to mention nightmares, more pain and despair. ”

Also, your family can't accept me, even if you haven't spoken out about your suffering.

Thinking that everything that should be said was said, he got up after taking a sip of the cup of coffee, and his hand was grabbed. Lowered my eyes, this is the first time I have seen Zhou Yu's face turn white, with helplessness and pleading in his eyes, "Jia Xiaoru-"

After a long time, Xiao Dong asked me: Since you love so much, why don't you stick to it? Maybe......

Maybe it's over, and then there's nothing left.

I said, "I can't get past the hurdle in my heart."

And I'm afraid that grinding and boiling will polish the last bit of love in my heart.

With Zhou Yu's temperament, it is not so easy to give up, even if I am decisive, he still comes to me.

Finally tore his face.

That afternoon, I was forcibly dragged by him to his apartment rented off-campus, and as soon as I entered the door, he grabbed my shoulders and pushed me against the wall, he lost his usual calm, and said incoherently: "Jia Xiaoru, you are mine, I have liked you since I was a child." ”

I looked at him coldly and asked, "How can you let me go?" ”

His face was painful, and his tone was ruthless with gritted teeth: "I won't let go for the rest of my life." ”

He lowered his eyes, and a slightly sour wetness invaded his sockets.

Zhou Gongjin, do you know that a lifetime is really too long.

My silence made him even more flustered, and his fingers lifted my chin and kissed me. It's not like the previous eagerness, it's very light and light, and the lips are pressed together. The room was dim, and I saw a glimmer in his eyes, whether it was the tears in his eyes or the color of his eyes.

Close your eyes and numbly let him hold it. How attached this embrace used to be, how sad it was at this moment, I didn't feel a trace of warmth, and even a cold breath penetrated into my skin, making my whole body tremble.

When he moved his lips to his neck, I whispered, "Zhou Gongjin, do you know?" My father's last call before he died was for me, and he had a peace fruit rolling beside him, and from now on, I would not be able to sleep peacefully every Christmas Eve, and I might never be able to eat an apple again. ”

He paused, took two steps back from me, his eyes glazed down.

I said, "Forget it, okay?"

He hugged me again, strong and resolute, "Not good! Jia Xiaoru, I, Zhou Yu, am not finished with you. ”

My tears fell out of my eyes, and I pulled at the hem of his shirt and cried, "Are you going to force me to death?" ”

He was shocked, and his clenching hand loosened little by little, and I pushed him away hard, turned to open the door to leave, but he forcibly hugged him from behind. Then, his face was buried in my neck, like a desperate beast, his voice was tense with sobbing, and even his breath was trilling: "Jia Xiaoru-"

The warm liquid flowed down the back of my neck.

This time, I didn't struggle anymore or push him, I just let him hold him, and then, bursting into tears.

He gradually quieted down, except for occasional slight twitching of his body.

lowered his head, pulled away the hand he locked in front of him, and said softly: "I'm leaving, you will take care of it in the future." ”

Fingertips slipped, temperature was missing, and I walked out the door.

Since then, he has not seen Zhou Yu again.

Later, I accidentally met Qian Xiaobao and said that Zhou Yu applied for an internship before graduation and left school.

Yes, he's a senior, and every semester, we're only two years apart.

And this time, we lost love.