After graduating from college, I completely cut off contact with her.

I didn't try to find a job and started writing books from home.

When I was in high school, I had a dream that I could become an author, and I read a lot of books at that time, but after I went to college, I let go of this idea, probably because I didn't write anything and was crushed by my parents' cold eyes.

I picked up this ideal again, but I didn't know what to write about, so I began to try to write about some of my own experiences, and there were not many experiences of one person.

It will be done in no time.

Later, I didn't have a story, and I wanted to write a story about me and her, but I don't know where to start, my story with her was so plain, so plain that we didn't even meet a few times.

Later, she became indifferent, and even forgot about her existence many times.

I would lean back on the couch and meditate for an hour or two every day, thinking about my past, present, and future.

I never thought about the future of this, so I didn't think about it, I just liked it.

One day, I went to the house of a friend I had just met and saw a poem on his desk:

You're like an angel,

Rid of my hell the shackles of bondage,

Liberating me from my imprisonment has given me gentleness and kindness,

Endless wandering.

You're like an angel,

An incision was cut in my cocoon,

Fly high with me and let me forget the pain,

Not forgotten.

……

Maybe it's not like a poem, I feel a little emotional.

still teased him: "I didn't expect to be a poet."

"I didn't write it," he said.

I asked, "Is that?"

"A friend," he said.

I said, "Can you take me to her?"

He said, "Haha, I can't see it, I died in a car accident last year."

I watched as he opened his mouth wide and was a little speechless.

He smiled, a somewhat stiff smile that looked sympathetic.

I didn't speak again.

I guess this guy probably has a lot to do with him.

I thought we were going to be silent like this, but he spoke anyway.

"She's my girlfriend, she's in high school when we met, she's an orphan and her family is very poor," he said.

"I'm not an orphan, but I rarely see my parents, they gave birth to me, they didn't think about raising me, and left me a house, some money."

"When I saw her, she was secretly smoking a cigarette in the playground, it was funny, she choked half to death."

"Her parents were stimulated when they died, they had some problems with their IQ, they were a little forgetful, and sometimes they forgot what happened one second and the next."

"Then she left her filthy nest and moved in with me."

"We weren't alone anymore and we were living very comfortably, until one day I got a call from the hospital, and then I lost her completely."

I said, "Then you must be very sad."

He smiled and said, "I was very sad at the time, but now it's okay, I still have a job."

Is working hard numbing your nerves?

He was a very optimistic person when I first met him, and I didn't expect him to have such an experience.

I thought about me and Xue Yu, compared to them, what can mine be counted?

I always thought that this kind of plot could only be seen in some novels and television.

It turns out that we haven't had too much contact with such people before, it's just that we imagine the world too beautifully.

When I left his house, I copied the poem from his desk and got home and tucked it into an end-of-the-book on the shelf.

I haven't seen him for a long time after that.

I thought he should have returned to the trajectory of his life.

I have never and cannot imagine what it is like for a person to love another person to the point where they can't help themselves, to the extreme.

Haven't experienced it and don't want to experience it.

One day, I was leaning back on the couch drinking tea after writing a chapter when I suddenly received a call from another friend.

It was noisy on the other end of the phone.

He said, "Ye Xuan is dead, do you want to come and see?"

Ye Xuan is the friend who has just met.

I froze, I never thought that the big living people who were chatting together some time ago would be gone.

I asked him, "How did you die?"

He said: "The doctor said that he had overdosed on sleeping pills and was not saved."

I know.

After hanging up the phone, I still couldn't calm down for a long time.

How deep should the relationship between the two be so that after one party leaves, the other party can fall asleep at night with a lot of sleeping pills?

This is unimaginable.

The magic of love makes people helpless.

I went to his funeral, and I was probably not the only one who heard his story, and some people told me about his experience.

"It's a pity, quite a capable person."

"How?"

"His parents didn't take care of him, he not only cured his girlfriend's illness, but also earned a lot of money."

"He probably didn't expect to leave so early."

"He knew that even the will had already been written."

I was speechless, and passers-by looked at me with a miserable smile.

I asked, "Are his parents here?"

He said, "I came to see it, put on the pillar incense and left."

Lamentable.

I stayed where I was for a long time and didn't come back to my senses, a person's fate could have been so miserable, until this moment his parents did not want to accept him as a son, and even the only bond was ahead of him.

He walked very cleanly, probably knowing that there would be such a day, he had already made a will and donated all his property.

The red stripes come, and the stripes go.

When I came to this world, I didn't cause any sensation, I didn't bring anything, I didn't take anything with me when I left, and I didn't even leave any traces of my life in the world.

Years later, when we talk again, we may talk about him, and we may forget his name.

Perhaps, he will never be talked about again.

Later, I returned to the normal trajectory of my life, and nothing happened around me that could stir up a ripple in my heart.

At some moments, we are always on the verge of love, hoping that a certain relationship can last for a lifetime.

It's a luxury, and it's not impossible.

Life may play tricks on us, feelings don't, it only plays with life.

Many times the superficial people who love become couples who accompany each other for a lifetime, but the people who love deeply fail to last long, which is probably the meaning of what we often say "love is naturally cool in the depths".

Maybe that's not what I meant to be, and I'm playing with words again, but that's exactly what happened.

For a long time after that, I didn't have any waves in my life.

The girlfriend I had in my junior year also broke up during this time, which was expected, and I didn't have any emotional foundation in the first place, and we were like strangers when we were together.

After that, every day I was boring to write articles.

When writing novels, I always run out of words, and I will read some books for inspiration.

I took out the dusted book from the bookshelf and flipped through it page by page.

A piece of paper falls out at a certain page.

There's a poem written in it.

I'm starting to be glad I heard the story and I'm happy to share it with everyone.