When I first graduated from high school, I met a girl.

Her name is Xue Yu, a very cheerful and kind girl, we met when we were playing games, and soon after we met, we began to have a vigorous love.

It was a happy time with her.

We were in an online relationship, and in the beginning, we would make video calls every night for a long time.

When I first entered my freshman year, even the people in the dormitory were asleep, and we were playing videos in the dark, even if we couldn't see each other, it seemed that we could feel a strong love.

The first time I met her was during the summer vacation of my sophomore year.

Her family is from Nantong, and I went to Jiangsu on the pretext of going to Suzhou to work as a holiday worker, which is very close to Nantong, more than two hours by car.

When I saw her, she was waiting anxiously at the train station.

Two people who love each other always have a heart, she looks at me at a glance, and I recognize her at a glance.

She's a little bigger than in the photo, but she's still cute.

In the afternoon, we visited a lot of places and ate a lot of local specialties.

The next day I went back to Suzhou.

I was reluctant to leave, I kissed her, and she responded enthusiastically.

I worked in Suzhou Electronics Factory for a month, and after getting my salary, I saw her once and went back to Lanzhou.

I haven't been to see her since school started, and time has become a matter of the essence.

I would call her at any time of the day, and she would take pictures of all the places she had been and send them to me, and she would say, "Even if we don't have time together, I'm going to show you all the places I've been."

She didn't see snow a few times, and it rarely snowed in the south.

In the winter, every time I got out of college in Lanzhou, I would call her and ask her loudly if she looked good.

Every time, he will put his mobile phone on the table, carefully look at the snowflakes flying in the sky on the screen, and sigh like a child who has never seen the world: How beautiful!

Such days have passed for a long time.

She studied teacher training and law, and she was one year older than me.

She was a senior in my junior year.

They are busy with internships at law firms, so they have less time to talk to her.

Sometimes it takes two or three weeks to make a phone call, and even the QQ spark logo, which has been in place for more than a year, disappeared that year.

When I was bored, I flipped through the chat history of the time I first met her two years ago.

At that time, she was very emotional.

She said, "Do you have me in your heart?"

It's a very literary sentence, but I didn't see it, and if I didn't reply to her message in time, he would think about it.

Send a smiling emoji first, followed by a few words.

"I think I probably know."

"I don't want to speculate on your heart, but I deeply suspect that my message is a nuisance to you."

"That's it, cancel the pinning and special off, and then turn off Do Not Disturb all group messages, and let the messages bombard in turns, so that you won't be waiting for you like an idiot."

"I guess I'm not a special deal with you, but it doesn't matter."

When I saw it, it was already a day later, and I couldn't laugh or cry, and I was so busy that I forgot to look at my phone, and she would think so much about it.

I would also pretend to be very deep and say to her:

"Why are you so emotional all of a sudden? It makes me feel a little uncomfortable. ”

"Sometimes I don't reply to the message in time, because I've been too busy lately, if you feel too tired to wait for me, just leave, I can't give you anything now, and I can't be with you all the time."

She would say, "If I want to leave you, will I send you this?"

I said, "I can't give you anything."

She said, "I don't want anything, it's enough to have you."

I spent an afternoon reading all the conversations with her, and I was touched by some feelings, so I combined them and sent them to her, with the sentence: "It turns out that I have always loved you so much."

It took a long time for her to reply.

"I was so stupid," she said.

When I saw this sentence, my heart was a little blocked, I clicked on the keyboard to send something, hesitated for a moment and put down the phone.

Maybe he did get smarter, or maybe he didn't love him as stupidly as he used to be.

This long-distance love has gone on for nearly three years, and the number of times we have seen each other in these three years can be counted on my fingers, and sometimes I feel guilty, but I can't do anything about it.

In the winter of my junior year, I bought a train ticket to Nantong and didn't tell her.

I bought the Celebrity Bear set and wanted to surprise her.

When I arrived in Nantong, it was rarely snowing, and the snow was different from the north, it was one by one, like a miniature version of hail.

I squatted in front of the law firm where she interned for an hour and a half, it was very cold, and I kept rubbing my hands, and I was full of joy to make up for the way she looked when she saw me.

I thought about it a lot: happy, enthusiastic, excited, but I didn't think about what it was like when she came out.

Walking out of the door, his heart was half cold when he saw her.

She took a man's arm.

They looked at each other affectionately and chatted happily.

She saw me and said to the man next to her, "Wow, that bear is so cute."

I looked at their distant backs in a daze, tears had already wet my eyes, but no one saw them.

Everyone saw a bear with a smiling face, but they couldn't see the sad face hidden beneath the smiling face.

When they were gone, he took off his hood.

The snow drenched his hair and his heart.

I didn't talk to her about it after I got back, and it was like it never happened, and we still called every few days and weeks as we used to.

The only thing that has changed is that I have a much colder attitude towards her, and I will no longer send her a lot of messages every day as before. It doesn't matter if there's a key to love or a chat flame on our icon.

Until a moment of discouragement.

After letting go of her completely, I had a new relationship at school.

I left a message on her QQ: "Let's break up."

At that time, I didn't know when she would see it, it didn't matter, and all I had of was disgust with her at that time.

Three days later, she called.

She asked me, "Why?"

I said, "You only see the news from three days ago, so don't ask for excuses."

She also has a reason: "I'm too busy with my internship to read the news."

After that, he said a lot of words to redeem himself, but I don't remember the exact content very well.

I said, "That's it, I have a new girlfriend."

I hung up the phone and was still a little melancholy, and my heart seemed to be empty.

A relationship that has been gone for three years is gone if it is gone.

I got drunk that night and told my current girlfriend this story about me and her.

She said, "Maybe she's not the kind of guy you think?"

I asked, "Is it still important that we all broke up?"

She said: "Of course it's important, two people who really love each other, what is this misunderstanding?"

I laughed, and if the facts could be guessed, I would rather believe it was a misunderstanding.