That night, Cheng Yan sat with her mother for a long time, she didn't say a word, she kept listening to her mother silently, but she didn't understand. She looked at her mother's sad face, sometimes disgusted, sometimes hopeful, tears accumulating in her eyes, constantly whirling, but her mother desperately endured it not to fall. He Tu kept that posture unchanged, and when the glimmer of light outside the window finally disappeared, Cheng Yan got up and turned on the light.

He Tu hurriedly wiped away the tears in her eyes, she didn't want her daughter to see her crying, she just wanted to spit out the boredom in her heart, so that she would feel more comfortable.

This is the first time Cheng Yan has heard her mother tell the story of her since she married into her father's family, and the story is inevitably subjective, and even portrays Mu Shi as an unforgivable villain. But in Cheng Yan's heart, her grandparents love her, although now that she is getting older, this kind of love is not obvious, but when she was a child, their memories of taking care of themselves and living there are very good memories. Listening to her mother constantly complaining about her grandparents, Cheng Yan felt a little puzzled, she couldn't imagine what they said in her mother's mouth, and she didn't want to imagine it, she wanted to always believe that grandparents were like in her heart.

Finally, my mother finished complaining about her grandparents and began to talk about my father. Cheng Yan sat and listened, feeling a little tired, so he took off his shoes and went to bed, leaned on the pillow and listened. When the mother talked about her father, her eyes were not love, nor family affection, she didn't even see a trace of emotion in her eyes, they were full of disgust and disgust, she complained about her father in great detail, blamed her father, as if her father did not have any advantages in her eyes, but was full of shortcomings, just talking and eating, doing some very ordinary little things, she felt that this was an unforgivable mistake. At the end, Hedi's tone trembled, and she turned her head out the window and muttered, "Do you know how disgusting I feel when your dad lies on top of me at night......

Cheng Yan frowned, she didn't quite understand the meaning of her mother's words, but she vaguely felt that this was not a good word, nor was it a sentence that could be understood by her age. She didn't even dare to pay attention, only let that sentence turn in her ear, and quickly forgot about it. But her mother is still talking endlessly, and regardless of whether Cheng Yan can listen or not, she seems to have treated Cheng Yan, who is only eleven years old, as an adult's trash can.

When the heavy night had completely covered the room, Cheng Yan got up and turned on the lights. As soon as the light was turned on, the closure seemed to be electrocuted, and the body shook and came back to his senses. She glanced at her daughter, and saw that the white and beautiful face that resembled Cheng Jiahua had a faint look on it, neither sympathy for the past events she had experienced, nor the dissatisfaction of the same enemy who stood on the same front with her, she suddenly understood that her daughter would not really experience this feeling in her heart, although it was a piece of meat that fell from her body, but she could never understand the feeling in her heart.

Thinking about it like this, He Tu couldn't help but smile bitterly, the hardships and discomforts she has experienced over the years can only be experienced by herself, and no one can understand or help her share it.

No, there is such a person.

He Di's heart moved, and Zheng Xi's face suddenly appeared in his mind. That face is gentle and kind, and when you look at yourself, there is a sparkle in those eyes, and that light appears only for yourself. Under the gaze of his eyes, Hetu can truly realize that he is a unique person in this world.

It was Zheng Xi who gave himself a glimmer of hope to live in this world and injected freshness into his lifeless life.

He Tu lowered her head, and her face couldn't help but turn red, like a little girl who had just entered puberty. She glanced at Cheng Yan, saw Cheng Yan leaning on the pillow again, twisted it, and asked, "Xiao Yan, what do you think of your Uncle Zheng?" ”

Cheng Yan was stunned for a moment and glanced at his mother. Seeing that there was no longer a look of disgust on her mother's face, on the contrary, there was a flush, and the whole person was soft. At the mention of Uncle Zheng, she immediately thought of her first menstrual period, and her brows couldn't help frowning, and she felt uncomfortable in her heart.

Because of that incident, as long as Zheng Xi came to the house in the future, Cheng Yan tried every means to avoid him. She felt that her face had been lost to Zheng Xi, so she was reluctant to contact him. But when my mother asked, she couldn't help but answer, so she lowered her head and thought for a while, and said vaguely, "It's good." ”

"Well, your Uncle Zheng is good, it's very good." He Tu smiled, suddenly remembered something, and turned his head to Cheng Yan and said, "The stationery you use and the books you like to read were all bought by your Uncle Zheng, and he won't let me tell you, I'm afraid you don't." ”

Cheng Yan was stunned again and couldn't help but be stunned. She has loved reading since she was a child, but no one in her family likes to read except her, so she won't buy books. Growing up, she had no other books to read except for the Hans Christian Andersen fairy tales, and if she really wanted to read them, she went to school to borrow them from her classmates or exchange books to read. But how much she wants to have her own books, as long as they are her own, she will definitely keep them and cherish them. Unfortunately, I told my mother several times, but when my mother heard that it was not a study book, she was reluctant to buy it for her, saying that it was a waste of money. Once when she went home, she saw Zheng Xi at home, so she wanted to avoid him again, but her mother called her over, pointed to the two books and a box of new stationery on the table, and said with a smile: "I bought it for you, do you like it?" ”

Cheng Yan glanced at his mother in disbelief, refusing to believe that his mother bought it for him. But the two books were so brand new, and the stationery was so small and cute, she couldn't help but hold them in her arms and nodded in surprise.

At that time, she was so happy that she didn't notice the expression of Uncle Zheng sitting on the side, and she never thought that the book and stationery were bought by him.

"He also told me that you are studying at night now, and when you come back late, I bought you a small flashlight for you to use on the road." As he spoke, he leaned over and took a delicate small box from the bedside and handed it to Cheng Yan.

You don't need a flashlight, but what girl doesn't like nice things? As soon as Cheng Yan saw the package, she felt very happy, she hurriedly took it and looked at it carefully, and couldn't help but be a little excited.

She hadn't received such a good-looking gift since she was sensible.

Needless to say, grandparents are better for her, but adding new things is limited to buying a new dress for the New Year, not to mention these gadgets. Every time my father came back, he would bring some delicious and fun things, but most of those fun things were bought for his younger brother Cheng Lin, but very few were bought for her, or they were things for daily use. According to his father, he didn't know what the little girl liked, so he didn't know what to buy. At first, Cheng Yan didn't think there was anything, but seeing that his younger brother had more and more toys, as long as he told his father what he liked, his father would try his best to buy it back, but he didn't have anything, even if he said that he liked beautiful little dresses, good-looking books or other gadgets, but his father would only agree when he heard it, promising to buy it for her, but then he immediately forgot about the back of his head, and he couldn't think about it. Gradually, Cheng Yan got used to it, and she no longer asked her father and mother for anything, because she knew that even if she said it, they wouldn't remember it.

Therefore, when she received these small gifts, although they were not expensive and not what she really wanted, she still felt very happy and satisfied.

Because of this incident, she really had a better impression of Zheng Xi.

Therefore, when her mother kept talking to her about Zheng Xi again, her brows were no longer wrinkled, she listened carefully, playing with the small flashlight in her hand, with a slight smile on the corner of her mouth, and occasionally echoed her mother for a sentence or two. And the expression on my mother's face, like the colorful glow on the horizon reflected by the setting sun, was so bright and dazzling, exuding endless beauty and vitality. Cheng Yan had never seen her mother like this, and she couldn't help but be stunned.

The mother and daughter didn't know how long they talked, until Cheng Lin came back, and the curtain outside clicked, and Hedi stopped talking.

"No food?" Cheng Lin rummaged through the kitchen and asked loudly.

"I'll do it." Then she got up and got out of bed to put on her shoes, she turned her head and whispered to Cheng Yan, "Don't tell your brother about this." ”

Cheng Yan nodded obediently, and then he relieved himself and walked out. Cheng Lin threw his schoolbag on the chair, sat down, and complained, "I'm starving to death." ”

"Where are you running so late? You wait to be careful, your dad comes back and beats you to death. ”

Cheng Lin rolled his eyes and said, "I'm going to play with my friend." ”

"You have a fart friend at such a young age, I think it's those little bastards who have brought you badly, so don't have anything to do with them in the future!"

Cheng Lin replied vaguely, and reached out to take something out of his schoolbag, which was a slingshot, which he made himself, and the schoolbag was full of small stones.

He's a few years older now, but he's not as wild as he was when he was a child, maybe it's really what Hetu said, he's just been spoiled by the little bastards outside. After being educated by his father a few times, he himself is more sensible, and he no longer loses his temper at random as before, but his personality is still very stinky, and he is the same as Hetu, and he has to lose his temper at every turn. But gradually, Hetu got used to it, if he lost his temper, then he would have a trouble with him, and he was afraid that his son would not be able to do it?

After the final exam, it's time for winter vacation. Just started the first year of junior high school, Cheng Yan didn't have a lot of homework, so he could relax and go out to play. But she didn't have any specific place to go, her friend's house was very far away, her mother was not allowed to go by herself, and Cheng Lin refused to play with her. She often ran to her grandparents' house to find Cheng Siwen and Cheng Siyi. She has few playmates, Cheng Siwen and Cheng Siyi are two, and the three of them often get together to play games that girls like to play. The weather was very cold on this day, and the whistling north wind blew like a knife on her face, but it was precisely because of this weather that Cheng Yan felt very happy, because in the cold winter, she didn't have to go to the garden to help her mother sort out the farming, and she wouldn't be arranged by her mother to do more work. In winter, my mother also seemed lazy, just cowering in bed and knitting sweaters, or so distracted that she didn't even bother to say a word.

Cheng Yan got up in the morning, finished sweeping the floor, wiped the table, wrote his homework for a while, and prepared to go out to his grandparents' house. He asked a question, only telling her to come back early, and didn't say anything else. Cheng Yan put on his coat, wrapped his scarf, and put on his hat, and went out happily.

My house is not very far from my grandparents' house, but it is not close, and it takes more than ten minutes to walk. Cheng Yan was bouncing around, not feeling tired at all, but feeling very happy. When she arrived at her grandparents' house, she went straight to Cheng Siwen's room, her uncle and aunt were not there, only two cousins were there, they stayed in the warm room, lying on the table and doing their homework. Cheng Yan leaned on the window first to take a look, then opened the curtain and went in, and said with a smile: "I'm here!" ”

Cheng Siwen and Cheng Siyi both raised their heads, both smiled, and stood up. The three of them held hands and sat down together. Cheng Yan looked at their homework, and the three of them exchanged views on their winter vacation homework.

When it came to a happy place, the two girls didn't have the heart to do their homework, and discussed what they wanted to go out to play. Cheng Siwen ran to the bottom of the cabinet, dug out a sandbag in a drawer, and said happily: "The three of us go and throw sandbags!" Of course Cheng Yan agreed, she looked at the happy appearance of her two younger sisters, and she also felt very happy. She stood in the doorway, waiting for the two of them to put on their coats, and then lifted the curtain and went out, and now the wind was a little lighter, not like a knife as before.

The three of them set up an array in the courtyard, and were about to make a fist to decide who would start first, when footsteps came from outside the gate. Cheng Yan turned his head and saw that it was the little uncle, only to see him frowning, with a sad face, and walked in in a hurry, without even looking at the three of them, he went to his grandparents' room.

Cheng Yan was about to shout, but Cheng Siwen pouted and whispered, "Don't shout!" ”

"What's wrong?" Cheng Yan looked at her suspiciously.

"The third uncle quarreled with his grandparents." Cheng Siyi hurriedly said, she turned a pair of clever black eyes and smiled mischievously.

"Why?" Cheng Yan's interest suddenly came up, and he couldn't help but come to the two of them.

"I don't know, it seems to be for the third uncle to marry his daughter-in-law."

"What's so noisy about this." Cheng Yan was suddenly in a lack of interest, she thought it was a big deal.

"What do you know, grandpa won't let the third uncle marry the one he wants to marry."

"Have you seen it?" Cheng Siyi turned her head to look at her sister, although she was young, she knew a lot, and she didn't know where she learned it.

"I haven't seen it." Cheng Siwen shook his head. Her face was pale, and she looked sick, far less clever than her sister seemed.

"I've seen it." Cheng Siyi showed a wicked smile, "I've seen her with her sister-in-law, and she looks so good." ”

"How pretty?" Cheng Yan asked again.

Cheng Siyi looked at the sky and thought for a while, and said with a smile: "It's as beautiful as crape myrtle." ”

Cheng Yan imagined Ziwei's appearance, couldn't help laughing, and said, "That's really good-looking." ”

The three of them giggled, not paying attention to the sound of quarreling again in the grandparents' room, at first it was very quiet, then it gradually became louder, and there was even the sound of smashing things. The attention of the three children was immediately attracted to the past, especially Cheng Yan. Every time she came to her grandparents' house, she was told by her mother that if something happened here, she must remember to tell her. At this time, she suddenly remembered her mother's words, hurriedly threw down her sandbag, and quietly slipped towards her grandparents' door.