For as long as I can remember, I haven't seen my mom, only photos.

When I had the impression that the first picture I saw, my dad told me that this was my mother, a kind and gentle person, and wanted me to be a good doctor like my mother.

I didn't understand at first, because Aunt Zhao told me that my mother hadn't finished her studies at all, let alone a doctor.

But she saved a lot of people.

My mother left me a letter, and every year on my birthday, my father would read it to me, until I could read it independently, and I didn't like to listen to my father's letter.

Because he reads very slowly, sometimes he will stop for a long, long time after reading a sentence.

At that time, I was not sensible, and I could not understand what my father felt when he read the letter, and I did not know what the concept of death was.

Dad told me that Mom had gone far away and that I might not be able to see her for a while.

But my mother writes back every year, and since it is so far away, how can I get home?

Every time I hear my dad talk about my mom, I feel that my mom is very great, and I want to see her even deeper.

I pestered my dad that I had to see my mom or I wouldn't go to school.

I even broke my father's computer, and he lost his temper so hard that he beat me up and ignored me for three days and three nights.

It was the first time he hit me, and the last time in my childhood, so I was very impressed.

I was a little angry and asked Aunt Hong to take me to Aunt Zhao's house.

It was then that I heard the first word "death" in my life.

"Zihua is dead."

This is what I overheard, Aunt Zhao and Yasui couldn't stop crying when they talked to their uncle.

I know the name Zihua, and the necklace in my father's box has my mother's name engraved on it, which are these two words.

I ran over, grabbed Aunt Zhao, and asked her, "What's wrong with my mother?" What does it mean to die? ”

Aunt Zhao was so crying that she couldn't speak, and Uncle An taught me: "Death is to go to another world, your mother has already gone to another world four years ago, and when your heart grows up, you can also go to another world to find your mother." ”

I'm not sensible, but I'm not stupid either.

"Then why is Aunt Zhao crying?"

"Because Aunt Zhao will have to wait a long time before she goes to that world."

I am very grateful to Uncle Ann for comforting my young heart with such simple and understandable words.

At that time, I thought, I should grow up quickly so that I can go to my mother's world.

But Uncle Ann warned me not to tell my father about it, I didn't understand why my father cried, but the thought of my father crying made me feel uncomfortable.

He clearly taught me that men don't flick when they have tears, but now he has become a crying nose, isn't that very embarrassing?

It was much later that I realized that the letter my mother had given me was not sent back from another world by her at all, but that my father had taken it out of a wooden box.

My mother wrote it to me before I was born.

But my dad was able to receive letters from afar, and to be honest, I envied my dad.

Mom said that she wanted me to take good care of my father, and I thought that I, as a man who didn't cry, should be able to take care of my father.

But I seem to be the only one who knows about crying nose, and my father is a world-famous musician, although my mother told me in the letter, but I still reluctantly agree with it.

Who made the mother in the video play the piano so well, she must be a very talented person, so she has a good eye.

But the hateful thing is that there are always other women around my father, so many people want to come to be my stepmother, I silently think every day, Mom, if you don't come back, Dad will be snatched away.

But life is not what you want to do, and I haven't been able to bring my mother back after so many years of anticipation.

When I was sixteen years old, I was at the same table with a girl whose long hair was wavy and her eyes were as beautiful as a doll's.

Aunt Zhao said that when my mother had feelings for my father when I was eight years old, I was twice as late, and I was really short of my mother in terms of emotional intelligence.

Over the years, I finally understood that these women who are close to my father were all introduced by my grandparents, and they hoped that my father could marry someone else and give me a complete home.

I don't want a complete home, I think it's complete now.

Everyone thinks I'm unreasonable, obviously I haven't seen my mother since I was a child, and even my father, who loves my mother deeply, can come out, why can't I let go.

I don't know what my dad was like in the past, but he was probably like now, addicted to smoking.

I grew up hating the smell of cigarettes, so my dad always avoided me and I only occasionally saw him out and smoke.

But such an excellent person as my mother likes a person like my father who loves to smoke, maybe my father smoked at that time, and he also avoided his mother.

But I hated that my dad was so comfortable accepting the family's arrangement.

I used to love my mother, but even if my mother died, how could I change my mind?

Now that I think about it, I really don't understand my father's mind, and I was still refusing for my father at that time, so why did I agree later.

I don't remember who that aunt was, but I remember that she was very kind to my father, and my father accepted the family's arrangement to let her live in the villa.

I was disgusted by the way she walked around the villa, but she still used her clumsy behavior to please me.

Dad has forgotten Mom, so if he marries this woman, he will soon forget about me.

I suddenly felt very calm inside, and I guess my father didn't care about my mother's things.

I took advantage of my father's absence to take away the necklace in the box, which was engraved with my mother's name, how could it be on such a merciless person.

That night, my dad was like crazy looking for the necklace, and the crying nose appeared in front of me again, and I felt a moment of pleasure in my heart.

Cry, cry, you're going to forget about your mom soon anyway.

But Dad didn't keep looking, but grabbed the woman and asked, "Did you take it?" ”

The woman didn't take it, she was the daughter of a rich family, so naturally she would not lack this money, but her father firmly believed that she took it at the time, and even put his hand on her neck.

He stared at the woman and said word by word, "Quick! Handful! Item! Chain! Deliver! Go out! Come! ”

So much so that for a long time after that, the demons in my dreams were all my father.

He is obviously a very gentle person, whether it is for me or outsiders, the first time I saw him go crazy, it turned out to be like this.

I was so afraid of causing trouble that I gave him the necklace, but he didn't look at me, took the box and opened it to check it, and found that there was nothing unusual about the necklace, and then returned to the room in despair.

I began to be afraid, it turned out that he had not forgotten his mother, and looking at the way he looked, I would rather he had forgotten, so that at least he was only carrying my hatred, and not such a person who would go crazy at any time.

Since then, my grandparents have stopped introducing my father to someone, and the house has finally become cleaner.

I hadn't slept in the same room with my dad since I was five years old, and I was scared, so he let me sleep with the lights on. I often feel like someone is folding the quilt for me when I am half asleep and half awake.

"Your sleeping appearance is really following your mother."

Daddy's voice was low, but it was clear in my dreams.

I rolled over and went back to sleep.

In fact, I heard Aunt Zhao tell a lot of stories between my mother and father, and I really wanted to hear what my father told me, but every time I mentioned my mother, my father was silent for a long time.

After so many years, he still can't open his mouth.

It's obviously a happy story, but when I got to my father, it became such an unspeakable memory.

I envy my father, he can always receive letters on his birthday I don't know where to send them, and I still play this in this era, I guess my mother wrote it before, but I just asked people to send it at that time.

That's why I can hide it from my father, and my mother is actually long gone.

While he wasn't at home, I sneaked into his room and stole one of the letters to check on.

"Teacher Lin, today is your thirty-sixth birthday, time flies so fast, I have almost forgotten your appearance."

On the paper, there are still traces of tears that I don't know if it is my mother or father.

"Now you are at the peak of your man's charm, your parents must be urging you, and I don't know if you have found a stepmother for your original heart. If you do, then I must be happy. I don't want Chuxin to be without a mother. ”

It turned out that my father had compromised after reading this letter.

Daddy is for me, he just doesn't say it.

"By the way, speaking of Chuxin, he is already seven years old, have you asked him what he wants to do when he grows up? Do you want to be a doctor or not a musician? I said, my genes are so strong, it must have been inherited from me and not from you. ”

I couldn't help but laugh, but tears dripped down the paper.

My mother always wrote me letters praising the power of doctors, and I wished I could read them a hundred times a day, how could I not like to be a doctor.

"For so many years, I have been holding back and not telling you, in fact, when you told me that you were married, I already liked you very much, because you told me that what you are looking for is only someone who appreciates you, so I have been hiding my thoughts from you. The family told me that if you want to conquer a man's heart, you have to conquer his stomach, you see that I have been cultivated by you for so many years, or can only make tomato scrambled eggs, you see you, you have raised me to be a waste. If you can, can your next subject not be so good at cooking, I'm afraid you'll forget the taste of my tomato scrambled eggs, so you can easily forget me. ”

I can suddenly imagine my mother's feelings when she faced her father, she was obviously married to her father, and she had to hide it carefully, but I didn't know that my father's thoughts about her were even more profound.