"I'll go, I'm almost squeezed into a photo!"

On the steps outside the gate of the job fair, Wu Wei gasped for breath, and the clothes on his body were almost soaked.

Wu Wei, who is already a junior, originally wanted to find a part-time job, but when he came to the talent market, he saw a sea of people everywhere.

After finally squeezing in, I found that there was no suitable fit for me at all.

After coming out of the job fair with great effort, Wu Wei felt more tired than running a marathon.

Wiping the sweat from his forehead, Wu Wei, who was bored, raised his head, and with a thought, a progress bar appeared in front of him that only he could see.

This progress bar shows that it has been loaded to 99%.

Seeing the progress bar, Wu Wei let out a long sigh: "What the hell are you?" ”

A year ago, three hundred and sixty days ago to be exact, Wu Wei suddenly got a system, and then it was a rambling load.

At the beginning, Wu Wei thought that he had gotten some kind of anti-heaven system like the protagonist in the novel, and since then he has married Bai Fumei and walked all the way to the pinnacle of life, but now he finds out that the cliff of this system is a cheat.

No!

Not only a pit father, but also a pit sister, a pit mother!

It's been almost a year, and this hasn't finished loading yet.

Nima, you don't want to load three hundred and sixty-five days and send yourself three hundred and sixty-five blessings by the way, right?

But then again, the system progress bar isn't useless.

Wu Wei can fiddle with this progress bar at will like a noodle, putting it into an 'S' shape for a while, a 'B' word for a while, and a 'embarrassing' character when he is idle.

Just like now, at least you can pass the boring time of Wu Wei.

After playing for a while, I felt that I was almost resting, Wu Wei was about to put away the progress bar, and suddenly a voice came from his head: "Ding...... The invincible pretending to force the monster hunting system to load is complete! ”

Then, the progress bar disappeared from Wu Wei's hand out of thin air.

What?

Wu Wei's face was full of confusion.

The system has finally loaded?

"Distribute the ...... of the Starter Pack"

"The gift package has been distributed, please pay attention to the host!"

In the next second, before Wu Wei could react to what was going on, he suddenly felt that something fell from the top of his head and hit his head.

Wu Wei subconsciously touched it.

It's soft and has a greasy feeling, as if it's some special plastic film, and it's quite comfortable to the touch.

When he took it in his hand, Wu Wei's eyes instantly widened.

It was a condom.

"Damn, who is so immoral! Throw this thing away, are you bullying Lao Tzu as a boy chicken? ”

Wu Wei was very angry, and when he looked up, there was a clear sky overhead, and even the nearest building was more than ten meters away.

In this case, there is no such thing falling at all.

Could it be that it fell from the plane?

No, it seems that the system just said that it was a newbie package.

Ni Mei, this condom won't be a newbie gift bag, right?

This is really a pit cargo system!

"Ma Dan, it's bad luck for Lao Tzu!"

Wu Wei muttered a sentence and threw the condom behind him.

He is now more concerned about what the system is for, what the hell is it to send a condom in a gift package, he doesn't even have a girlfriend, so he can't use it at all.

The point is that the thing is still unpacked.

I was anxious in my heart, wanting to summon the system, but what I was waiting for was not the system, but a demagogic voice: "Immeasurable Heavenly Venerable, little brother, I see that your bones are amazing, you are a rare genius!" ”

The voice came from behind him.

Wu Wei turned his head and saw an old Taoist priest in his sixties with a smile on his face, wearing a Taoist robe and a trademark goatee hanging from the corner of his mouth.

What made Wu Wei almost unable to hold back his laughter was that the Taoist priest was holding the condom he had just thrown away on top of his head at this time.

"Ahem, this Dao Master, your routines are all old-fashioned, if you want to deceive people, can you change some tricks?" Wu Wei rolled his eyes and raised his feet to leave.

Your trouser pockets are cleaner than your face, and you don't choose a good partner when you deceive people.

Who knew that the Taoist priest was not young, but he was very athletic, shaking his head and stopping Wu Wei: "Little brother, aren't you here to find a job?" ”

Wu Wei said strangely: "It's looking for a job, but it has something to do with you?" ”

"I'm in need of an apprentice here." The Taoist priest grinned, revealing a mouth full of yellow teeth, and leisurely took off the condom on the hat on his head and stuffed it into his pocket.

Then the Taoist priest took out a stack of red leather books from his backpack, and then flipped through them one by one in front of Wu Wei.

"You see, I'm not lying, this is a certificate granted by the Dao Alliance!"

Level 3 Certificate in Ghost Hunting.

Monster Hunt Level 1 Certificate.

Level 2 Certificate in Feng Shui.

Level 3 Certificate in Physiognomy.

One by one, Wu Wei was dazzled.

Are you so dedicated to being a liar now, do you still have to take all kinds of certificates?

Wu Wei couldn't help but complain.

But after thinking about it, I'm idle now anyway, and it's not bad to play with this Taoist priest.

"I said, you have a lot of certificates, but where are there any ghosts in this world?"

"Immeasurable Heavenly Venerable, little brother, if you believe it, you don't believe it."

The old Taoist priest smiled slyly, and took out another piece of paper from his pocket, on which was printed the treatment of recruiting apprentices: "I saw you sitting there for a long time just now, muttering to the air and turning your hands upside down, very suitable for my line of work." ”

Rub, you might as well just say I'm going to pretend to be a ghost.

Wu Wei snatched the piece of paper, looked down, and was immediately moved.

There is a guaranteed income of 500 yuan for each practice, and it is also shared with the little apprentice according to the generosity of the employer.

The treatment is good.

500 yuan is enough to cover a month's food expenses, and you can occasionally add two eggs to breakfast.

Wu Wei licked his lips and asked tentatively, "Can I do this job?" ”

"Little brother, I said yes!" The Taoist priest smiled: "There is a business tonight, and I still lack an apprentice, how about it, try it with me?" ”

"Try it, try it, who's afraid of whom!" Wu Wei is very short of money now, anyway, this kind of thing is not harmful, it's just that rich people believe in this and ask for peace of mind.

Just do it!

Subsequently, Wu Wei asked himself in general what he needed to do.

After asking, Wu Wei understood.

It's too simple to be the apprentice of this old Taoist priest, so cooperate with him to deceive.

Under inquiry, Wu Wei learned that this old Taoist priest's name was Wild Dog Daoren, and he was said to be a disciple of Longhu Mountain.

But Wu Wei only listened to this, and didn't believe it at all.

If a person like the Wild Dog Daoist is a Taoist priest of Longhu Mountain, it will also damage the image of Longhu Mountain too much.

That night, the Wild Dog Taoist invited Wu Wei to have a big meal, a bowl of beef noodles for twelve yuan, and three whole pieces of beef in it, which made Wu Wei walk straight.

I can't help it, I've been hungry for almost a day.

Between meals, Wu Wei also gave himself a Taoist name by the way: Emptiness Dao Chief.

Well, Wu Wei feels that this Dao number is very in line with his temperament.

After eating and drinking, Wu Wei went to the toilet and changed into a robe given to him by the wild dog Taoist.

The robe was covered in patches, and it still exuded a rancid smell, and it felt like it hadn't been washed for eight hundred years, which made Wu Wei almost vomit out the meal he had just eaten.

But for the sake of the five hundred yuan, Wu endured all of this.

"I said old liar, when will the five hundred dollars be given to me?" Coming to the wild dog Taoist, Wu Wei was not polite, and asked with a shy face.

The wild dog Taoist looked at Wu Wei twice, and his originally smiling face suddenly fell, and he said solemnly: "Emptiness, you have to call Master." ”

"Cut, I don't really worship you as a teacher!"

"Call Master."

"Old liar!"

"Master Wild Dog!"

"Old fellow."

"Do you want five hundred dollars?"

"Master is above, please accept the apprentice's worship!" Wu Wei clenched his hands into fists.

The man has gold under his knees, if anyone gives me ten thousand taels of gold, Lao Tzu will give you his knees no problem.

Besides, Lao Tzu doesn't kneel, but he just obeys softly, and he won't lose anything.

"Ding...... Sure enough, it is the host selected by Ben Shuai, and he can bend and stretch his husband. Almost at the same time, a lazy voice suddenly sounded in Wu Wei's mind.

Then, Wu Wei only felt that he was holding something in his hand, soft and sticky.

Isn't that condom?

Just pinched it twice, and Wu Wei understood what he was holding in his hand.

This condom was obviously put away by the wild dog Taoist, when did it get into his hands?

As soon as he thought of the voice that appeared in his head just now, Wu Wei suddenly understood.

It can't be the ghost of the system, right?

"System, you're finally willing to show up!"

has been tossed by the system for nearly a year, and now there is a strange voice, and Wu Wei is no longer surprised.

The system yawned, "Excuse me, please call me Shuaibi." Ben Shuaibi accidentally slept when he chose you, and just woke up to serve the host wholeheartedly. ”

Wu Wei was stunned when he heard this, and almost fell to his head.

Co-authored system loaded for almost a year, is it sleeping?

I've never heard that the system sleeps.

Wu Wei's face was full of black lines: You really got this condom?

System: This handsome is created by the Heavenly Dao, and the demon hunting is the foundation, helping the host to cultivate the immortal path. And, please don't think so dirty, it's not a condom in your hand at all, but a newbie gift bag given to you by Ben Shuaibi, a Qiankun bag for demon hunting.