Li Yue'er

Chen Ran told me that he hopes that in all the days in the future, he can always be the person who is qualified to cook for me like today. As he said this, a cool night breeze blew in, and the dim light of the room flickered softly, making a tiny rustling sound. There was a bowl of white rice in front of me and him, and the most colorful scrambled eggs with tomatoes were shining with golden butter, the homely taste, and the smell of fireworks, which was the life I dreamed of in the world.

There is also the person sitting opposite, who is accustomed to seeing his command at work on weekdays, wearing a plain plaid shirt at the moment, with a milky white knitted vest, casual, free and easy, just like the male owner who returns from work, stripping off the exquisite suit outside, and arranging a simple or sumptuous dinner for himself and his lover, but it is a commonplace daily life in the years, but it is the most provoking yearning to stay, the world often says that the fairy couple, but ordinary as me, this life can have such a hundred years of good together, it is no regrets.

There were warm tears rolling in my eyes, I looked at him intently, Chen Ran's eyes were clear and elegant, and his words were loud, ironing into a deep love like the sea. I couldn't help but say, "Thank you for saying that, Chen Ran, I ......"

"Yue'er, you listen to me first" Chen Ran intercepted my words, stretched out his hand to hold my hand on the table, "Yue'er, you are such a passive and forbearant character, since the first day I met you, I have understood your introverted and mental nature, you are the kind of person who would rather suffer yourself than cause trouble to others" He exhaled deeply, "So, I know how difficult it is for us to get to where we are today." It must have taken great courage for you to accept my affection and accept me as a person, and I, apart from thanking God for his gift to me, can only repay you for everything you have given me by giving you all my heart......"

Chen Ran's voice was low and powerful, calm but firm, like a morning bell ringing in my heart, "Yue'er, I'm already married." I understand that just because you didn't say it doesn't mean you don't mind, on the contrary, it is precisely because you know that this is the biggest obstacle between us that you turn a blind eye to it. Chen Ran's eyes were shining with stars, and after a pause, he clenched my hand, "Yue'er, although you don't say it, I have to say it." I am not impulsive today, I am very clear about my feelings for you, when I decided to take this step, I told myself that I am responsible for my actions, I am responsible for you, please believe me, I will not let you bear the infamy of the world, I will not let you be with me unclearly, I will definitely give you complete love and destiny......"

Outside the window, the moonlight was dewed, and a faint light poured in, soft as mercury sprinkled on the ground, revealing the warmth of the veins that seemed to be absent. I saw a large sparkling pearl flower falling on the table in front of me, splashing and scattering, wet and light green tablecloth. Gently caressing his cheeks, there are warm and continuous tear stains, telling indescribable feelings and throbbing. Yes, how can you not be moved? Chen Ran, my most beloved person, told me without any request that this was not a dewy love, not a passionate love on the spot, he came with sincerity and responsibility, just to promise me a complete love.

He understood my difficulties and my concerns so well that he took the initiative to mention his marriage to Sister Xiaojuan. He will give it to me, and he will not hide it or hide it; He will deliver it to me, so that it is clear and clear; He wants me to stand side by side with him in the open, not to sneak up in the shadows behind him forever. He is so for me, for me, for me, for me. He knows that it is not easy for me, but how easy is it for him to take this step? If it weren't for a man with perseverance and courage, how could he have such iron-clad and loving compassion?

Downstairs came the sound of children's laughter, and the whispers of adults, it was the care of relatives, the appearance of home, and the appearance of life that I had imagined thousands of times. I have leaned on the balcony countless times to watch the people in the community, counting the endless laughter behind the thousands of windows, imagining that one day my lover and I will fold clothes, make beds, sprinkle and sweep, cook, and quietly weave our own flowers and full moon in the trivialities of life. I used to yearn for such a calm and peaceful happiness, and now, when my lover really opened his mouth to me in front of me, to allow me to be like this, I suddenly realized that there is a difference between imagination and reality after all, and at this moment, what is churning repeatedly in my mind is, Li Yue'er, bow your head and shake hands with reality.

So my voice blurted out to Chen Ran without warning - "No! It was so big that I was startled, and I saw his gaze froze suddenly, as if in disbelief, staring at me silently for a while. There was fine sweat oozing from his palms, and the dampness was not as warm and dry as it had just been. His eyebrows tightened, and he seemed to ask with some difficulty, "Why, Yue'er?" His voice was hoarse and tired.

Taking a deep breath, closing my eyes and opening them again, I made the most important decision in my life in the shortest time, put my other hand on the hand he was holding me, and looked at his eyes fixedly, as if to see it into my heart, and then, I said slowly in the calmest voice, word by word, "Chen Ran, don't divorce me, I am willing to stay by your side all the time." ”

Chen Ran held my hand and shook it, looking at me in disbelief, as if a thousand words came to his mouth, but he didn't know how to speak. After a long time, he shook his head, shook his head heavily, and the bones of his hand were distinct, and the bruised blood vessels protruded slightly due to the exertion, and the excitement inside was unobstructed. In the stillness and concentration, only his categorical voice floated in the air, "Yue'er, no, I can't let you be by my side like this. ”

A warm current swelled up in my heart, as if the morning glow of Sanchun penetrated the melt light leaking from the layers of branches and leaves, densely clustered into colorful beams of light, and the light dust danced in the air, making people's hearts bright. My beloved man, in the turbulent torrent of the world, even in the face of obstacles, still put me in his heart and did not want to be wronged, so how can I not sigh. I am not mistaken, Chen Ran, affectionate as him, moral as him, always so wholeheartedly for me, whether as his little sister, or his lover, his considerate care for me has not changed a bit, it is the gift of God, so that I can meet and know him in this life; It is the blessings accumulated in the previous life that can allow me to know and love him in this life; Because of this, I can't squander this precious fate, let alone just think about myself and others, and I can't let him face the ups and downs of the world alone! I don't just want to be a small grass behind him that allows him to shelter me from the wind and rain, I hope that what I can stand side by side with him is not the form, but the height of love and heart.

Without hesitation, I smiled at him slightly, "Chen Ran, you listen to me", my eyes in the ten fingers revealed unprecedented firmness, "I accept you, not only because you are good to me, but more importantly, because I have the same affection as you, because, I also love you." I can control my role in you, I can control myself to deliberately distance myself from you, but I can't control love. So, despite knowing that you were married, I couldn't help but fall in love with you. I've flinched, I've had lost, I've had resentment, I've been tossing and turning for you for countless late nights, I've complained about why God didn't let me meet you earlier, but I'm grateful to God for finally letting me meet you. For so many days and nights, I couldn't extricate myself from such hopeless and humble feelings, and I fell deeper and deeper."

Choked up for a moment, I lowered my head and sobbed softly. Chen Ran sighed, got up and walked slowly to me, rested my head on his shoulder, and listened to me continue, "Before today, I never had the luxury of hoping to have such a fate with you in this life and this life, I thought that being able to stay by your side as a little sister was the greatest gift from God to me. So when you said to me to take care of me all my life, do you know how shocked I was? I didn't expect you to have the same heart for me, I didn't expect that we were all on the road to each other for so long, I feel that I have never been so happy and happy, I understand the pain of asking for but not being able to be, so at that moment, although I don't know why you suddenly confessed to me, but I still choose to obey my heart, no longer struggle with it, I want you to know, you don't have to hesitate, don't panic, I have been here to guard you, waiting for you, I will not let you sad, I want to see the happiness of your wish fulfillment, Because I love you, don't you want someone to be happy? “

Tears rolled down my eyes and slid down my cheeks to Chen Ran's shoulders, wetting his clothes, but neither of them was aware of it. I really shed too many tears today, as if I have shed all the tears in my twenty-four years of life. The clock on the wall ticked and ticked endlessly, and I whispered softly as time passed, but it seemed to say to myself, "But even so, Chen Ran, I never thought of sacrificing your family to fulfill my happiness." What is the point of a union if it must be based on the suffering of another? My mother died early when I was in middle school, and I have been dependent on my father for so many years, so I learned very early that there are too many emotions in this world that we cannot give up, love, family, friendship, how to distinguish between which is more important? You and Sister Xiaojuan, you have gone through nearly ten years together, the love between you has long been fused with family and friendship, you have me, I have you, which can be easily let go? What's more, Sister Xiaojuan, it can be seen that she loves you very much, a day of husband and wife, if it is because of me, let you ignore her, even if we come together, how can our hearts be quiet and peaceful? I understand the pain of asking for nothing but not being able to get it, but I wonder if it hurts even more if I gain and lose it. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you, and I will not be able to pass myself in the first place! If I stand side by side with you at the cost of hurting your family and your wife, I would rather stand silently behind you and accompany you, even then I will become a third person or a bad woman in the eyes of the world, but what is this compared to having you? Raising my head, I sat up straight and stroked his face, "I once fantasized about the love in marriage, and I once disdained a third party who intervened in other people's marriages like the worldly currents, but now I understand that such a black and white clear either/or emotional outlook and morality are just that I have never experienced standing and talking without back pain, marriage is warm and cold, love is sweet and bitter, the most self-aware, I only now understand that not letting each other work hard is the greatest compassion of love." You don't have to be embarrassed, I can have peace of mind, no one will be hurt, and it is already the best state and the best choice in reality. ”

"So, Chen Ran, please be sure to promise me," I said solemnly into his deep dark eyes, even with a hint of pleading, "Don't divorce Sister Xiaojuan, don't." “