I returned to the Civil Affairs School early the next morning.

I got up and went into my father's room to see that he was still lying on the bed. I can't tell how strong the smell of smoke was in the room. Cigarette butts on the ground.

My heart is tugging. I guess my father stayed up all night.

Qi Zhengzhe took me to the station on a motorcycle. He had heavy dark circles under his eyes and looked like he hadn't slept well. He paid for a ticket for me.

We stood in the lobby waiting for the bus. There were already some people in the hall. Even early in the morning, the hall was a bit stuffy. Through the glass in the lobby, I saw a shuttle bus leaving the station.

"Have you communicated with Uncle Hao?" Qi Zhengzhe broke the silence.

"Dad's reaction was a bit strong." I say.

"He has his concerns, so I think you'd better be cautious."

"I will. Just ask Brother Zhengzhe to pay a little attention to my father these days, he may not have slept well last night. I spoke out about my concerns. My father would always drop me off at the station.

"Rest assured. For so many years, I have treated Uncle Hao as a father. ”

"Thank you." My eyes are a little moist. What Qi Zhengzhe said was by no means a lie.

On this day, I arrived in the provincial capital at about nine o'clock in the morning, and Qi Zhengli came to the school to look for me at half past twelve. Please pay attention, it's not Qi Zhengzhe but Qi Zhengli.

As soon as Qi Zhengli appeared at the door of the dormitory, I had a bad premonition. Something big must have happened. This must have something to do with my father.

"Qi Zhengli, why are you here?" I was amazed. The roommates stared at Qi Zhengli, just like when Qi Zhengzhe walked into our dormitory, the roommates stared at Qi Zhengzhe. There was no doubt that Qi Zhengli's hand was in his trouser pocket.

"Pack up your things and follow me back to Qijiatun, I'll wait for you outside." Qi Zhengli's expression was very serious, and he turned around and walked out of our dormitory.

The roommates chattered and talked around me. I packed my things, tears rolling in my eyes. It's not speculation anymore, otherwise Qi Zhengli wouldn't have talked to me like this.

I knew that when I walked out of the dorm room with my bag in my hand, my roommates must have confusion in their eyes. They must have thought I had fallen into an emotional spiral. Qi Zhengzhe and Qi Zhengli's skin tones are black and white, and they can't feel it.

As soon as I left the dormitory, Qi Zhengli took the bag in my hand.

"Something happened to my father, didn't you?" I asked.

Qi Zhengli's expression was solemn, "It's Uncle Hao who was hospitalized for wrestling." ”

"Wrestling? How do you fall? ”

"I didn't hear me very well on the phone. It should be Uncle Hao who picked bricks on a construction site and fell from the third floor! ”

"Ahh

Qi Zhengli stretched out his hand to support me. "I don't know the specifics. I didn't go to the hospital. Zhengzhe asked me to come directly to the provincial capital to pick you up. ”

"I know, it must be very serious."

Brother, picking bricks upstairs is my father's unique skill. From the year we fled to Qijiatun, my father began to pick bricks for the construction site. The most work he has done over the years is to pick bricks, who would have thought that he would be ruined on picking bricks?

really answered that sentence, the people who drowned are often people who know how to water.

Later, I heard people who worked with my father say that I always felt that my father was a little wrong that day, and he was preoccupied. The man said that he saw my father pick up a load of bricks and go to the third floor, and for some reason, he suddenly stepped on the air and fell down with the bricks.

Father fluttered in the air like a fallen leaf.

I have angina. I know why my father was so preoccupied that day. I know why my father could be a little wrong. It's all because of my decision to go to Yangjiang County to work.

The cigarette butts on the bedside proved that my father had not slept all night.

What I can't figure out is that my father didn't even want to take me to the station, so why would he go to the construction site to pick bricks?

Anyway, I indirectly harmed my father, which I never dreamed of. I really didn't expect that. If I had expected this, would I have made this decision? If I had expected my father to care so much about my return to Yangjiang, would I still have to make this decision?

I don't know, I don't know, ah, I really don't know.

But why is this happening?

I don't know how much longer than usual for this drive, every time the driver stops, I hate it, Qi Zhengli also helped urge the driver together, the driver was urged to scold, but finally saw a few big words at the bus station in Qijiatun County.

As soon as we got out of the car, we got on a tricycle.

My father was placed in Qijiatun County Hospital, a place that Qi Zhengli and I were very familiar with, a place where my father had lived in Qijiatun for nearly ten years and had not been because of illness.

Uncles and aunts, Qi Zhengzhe, and Qi Caihong, as well as a few people who worked with their father were all gathered around the ward.

When I ran into the hospital room in a panic and saw my father's head covered in gauze that was more than twice as swollen as his brain, I wept and wept and wept and became hysterical.

The father lay motionless on the bed. His mouth was half-open, gasping for air with difficulty. Seems to only exhale and not inhale. The gauze was covered in blood.

I couldn't believe that this man could be my father. Yesterday, I was talking and laughing with Uncle Qi, drinking and chatting, why can't I talk today?

When I said goodbye to him this morning, he also said to me, "Be careful on the road", how come he is now ignorant of his dearest people?

I really can't take it.

My sanity tells me that I am about to lose the last loved one.

My father was awakened by my actions, or he had been waiting for me to arrive, and although he couldn't open his eyes anymore, I felt that his hand could still move (probably trying to hold mine), but only his fingers.

"I seem to be conscious." Auntie said in surprise.

I looked up (I was crying on my father's body).

"Yes, you can see Uncle Hao's mouth seems to be moving." Qi Zhengzhe said.

Indeed it is! My father's mouth was only half-open and panting, but now his lips were squirming, and I quickly leaned my ear over it.

I heard my father say in a faint breath, "You—actually—don't ......."

"What?" I didn't understand what my father meant, and I wanted him to repeat it again.

But before my father could finish his sentence, he exhaled his last breath and let go of the hand that was half-holding me.

Father is gone. Forever and ever.

I mourn greatly. I shook my father's body desperately and shouted at him hoarsely, but it didn't work.

……

I didn't pay attention to my father's unfinished words at first, because I was busy with my father's burial.

Considering that my hometown has been submerged in water, considering that the graves of all my relatives in the family are also submerged in water, and most importantly, considering the events that happened in my father's hometown, I chose to bury my father on a hill near Qijiatun County at the strong suggestion of my uncle and aunt.

Fallen leaves always have to return to their roots, but my father's fallen leaves can only drift away forever in another country. The thought of this, the fact that my father had truly left me, brought tears to my eyes.

Ah, tears are also an "inexhaustible" thing, right? Otherwise, how could my tears flow so easily? When I saw my father's use, whether it was the chaise longue or the dustpan that was always placed at the door of the bungalow, I would cry there; When I hear my uncle and aunt talk about my father, whether it's about my father as a person or about something related to my father, I feel emotional.

The fact that a mallet can't be broken is that I'm a real orphan.

Qi Zhengzhe has been with me for the past few days. Although he was only 24 years old, he entered the society too early and came into contact with it too early, which made him very mature and sophisticated. His father's medical expenses and related compensation expenses, as well as his father's funeral, were all handled by him. His crutche-footed father wasn't much of a help.

Of course, Qi Zhengli also did a lot of things. Many small things are handled by Qi Zhengli. The general direction of his father's funeral is controlled by Qi Zhengzhe, such as inviting Mr. Feng Shui, inviting the person who blows the trumpet (Qijiatun County and our Yangjiang County have the same custom, and when you are old, you have to ask the person who plays the trumpet to play the relevant tune), and some small things such as cement, bricks and sand are all Qi Zhengli's efforts.

Qi Zhengzhe is still worried about me all the time, as long as he is free, he will stay by my side. You know, who is he who can be idle? He was asked to manage such a large department store, but he always found time to spend time with me.

Qi Zhengzhe didn't say too many comforting words, didn't say anything like "people can't be resurrected after death", just accompanied me, and many times didn't even say a word, just stayed by my side silently. That's how thoughtful he is. He was always so considerate to me.

But, brother, would you have thought that such a person would leave me forever and ever?

When I calmed down, I began to think about my father's words. "You—actually—don't ......," what did my father want to tell me? Or what do you want to tell me?

If it is to explain the aftermath, will it mean that you actually don't want to bury me in Qijiatun, but it may also mean that you don't actually bury me at the east gate.

If it is to comfort me, to comfort this daughter who he has never been relieved of, and to encourage me to live well, will he say, you should not be too sad and sad.

But if you're still worried about where I work, and if you're worried that I'll be affected by his manslaughter, will he ask me, you won't actually go to work in Yangjiang County, right?

I really wasn't sure what my father was trying to say to me, and I didn't think anything was impossible. This has become a suspense. It's really dead and unproven. In this way, it seems that I will not be able to let go of it in this life and this life.

In a trance, I remembered the night my father took me away, and I walked all night. In the pavilion on the way to Wangwu, my father handed me a washed sweet potato and told me the reason for his escape.

"Murder is a matter of life. If I pay for my life, you will be left alone in this world, and you are still so young. Father said.

Father, am I old enough now? Big enough for you to leave me safely?

I ask the heavens, and the heavens should not; I asked, but the earth was silent.