It's not the same thing that is influencing the file, but it's not the same thing I've seen in the past.

If it is not a "river", nor is it a "virus", then it can only be a third party. And what can become a third party, in my cognition and feelings, is only the "result" that the deviation ritual of the torchlight will bring. Although the Ritual of Deviance had not yet been completed, the effects had already been made, and in the case of those who performed the ritual, it was not denied that the ritual observers of the File were not affected in the slightest, even if the occult experts who had been killed before her did not exhibit such anomalies.

As a demonic messenger, the file is also affected by the deviation ritual - combined with two conceivable factors, I can only think that the "result" that the deviation ritual will bring is having a greater impact through the demonic messenger file in an indescribable way, and this influence may be triggered by the initiative of that "result", or it may be caused by the depth of consciousness that the file is now in and the mental state she is showing.

To describe it in a occult way, it may be: the file completes a small ritual under the condition of being qualified and unconscious, based on the magic pattern, using its own subconscious to connect with the collective subconscious of human beings, and using this as a channel to connect with a certain mystery that is not here and now, so as to obtain a power far beyond herself. In the occult, such manifestations have an official name: séance.

This so-called "god" is probably the one that the Deviation Ritual will bring, and that one can feel its horror even if you don't see it with your own eyes.

As I thought so, I gradually heard a harsh, psychedelic sound:

——EYA，EYA，ASATO……

The cacophony of music, the noise of noise, the incomprehensible chaos, all the unpleasant things stirred together, but it seemed to herald a greatness that transcended the physical and the spiritual. That is the core of chaos, the source of disorder, a certain existence beyond reason and sensibility, and a phenomenon that is presented relative to the "order" in personal cognition, but this mode of existence is not incompatible with the world on a macro level, but when it comes, the world will become another appearance that no one can imagine, and it is impossible to identify this appearance in advance to make targeted defenses, nor can it adapt after the change, which is unimaginable, extremely crazy and chaotic change. Soil without any known regularity.

There are so many things in my mind that I can't even describe in words, I can't even call it a phenomenon, it's an unbearable greatness, a message sent from somewhere far away and unknown, and just trying to listen to it almost explodes my intellect. And I can't stop myself from hearing these auditory hallucinations, nor can I prevent myself from accepting these information, I feel my own openness from this irresistible situation - yes, as a person, or as a non-person, I think of myself as an "individual existence", not closed, from the depths of the self there is a constant exchange of information with information from the outside world, and the depth, breadth and intensity of these information make people have to wonder what the so-called "individual" and "self" are, It makes people suspect that the so-called "self" is just an illusion, and that the confirmation of oneself is nothing but an illusion.

- "I" does not exist.

- The world in the eyes of "me" does not exist.

- All tangible things and intangible meanings also do not exist.

- All seemingly orderly movements, in the infinitely expanding unknown, are just an immeasurable chaos, and this chaotic landscape is the source of all things.

It's terrible, it's crazy, and such an understanding makes no sense to the "individual" and the "collective", nor to the "philosophical" and "mystical", nor to any movement. On the other hand, it is a meaningless existence in itself. However, this meaningless being does convey its influence through the channels of the underworld. I felt like I was caught in this vast and chaotic whirlpool, and my perception of myself, my understanding and thinking about the world, and even all the material and immaterial movements that make up the self itself, were being melted and become part of this macrocosm and greatness, greater than greatness. No, I'm already a part of it.

"No, no......" I wanted to resist, but rebellion also became a cycle in the face of such a large, deep and chaotic existence. The file figure was standing in front of me, and my eyes could see what kind of existence she was, but my perception was eroding this observation, allowing me to see what was connected to this humanoid, through time and space, and deep into the other side. The huge drill in the hands of this humanoid figure looks like a weapon, it seems to be a threat, but it is just a trick to deceive people, and when the file becomes like this, it has already become an empty shell, a port, and what really makes me feel terrifying and entangled is another indescribable existence that I have never seen before, and even the fear brought by this thing is worse than the natural fear that "virus" and "river" make me.

I can't describe, I can't speak, I'm melting.

I don't think I'm going to die, because the concept of "death" is just a small surface in such a chaotic and all-encompassing existence, but when even "death" becomes meaningless, "life" is also becoming meaningless.

The drill bit in the file humanoid's hand spun rapidly and grew stronger before my eyes, and by the time she jumped, the drill was as huge as a skyscraper. As the huge drill bit pressed down from above, the invisible and boundless darkness and the tangible and boundless earth that I could observe began to twist and rotate, and everything that seemed to be hard was like a water-filled soft mud. This is no longer something that a person can do in the depths of his own consciousness, and there has never been a consciousness walker who has ever done it.

The power that the file humanoid displayed at this moment should not be something that the file can do as a human being. When she does, she is no longer her, but it.

A huge vortex of giant drills is about to shatter everything, shattered, mixed together, and turned into meaningless and formless things. The process unfolded before my eyes, allowing me to see clearly, while I couldn't move. Because, what is constantly pouring into my mind, is causing my instincts, sensibility, and reason to collapse rapidly, and I can only feel this collapse, and I can't do anything.

I realized that the factors that dominated all of my actions were going to collapse at the next point in time. The end of the collapse is not death, but an insignificant part that turns into a great chaos. And I can't even wail.

My mind is still expanding, my out-of-body information is still diverging outward, and the information that makes up me is constantly merging into new information and becoming something new that I have never seen before. My "human form" is losing its details and contours, as if it were made up of countless worms, no, it is me who is breaking down into countless worms, wriggling in a new form as my self collapses.

Neither "metamorphosis" nor "metamorphosis" can describe the changes in myself that I can feel. Even so, I still don't want to give up, there is a miraculous idea of "giving up" and "persevering" in my will, and even, under this will, I am still trying to adapt to this change, obviously there is no hope, but I am still counting on something-

"Jiang!" I summoned up the last of my knowledge and called out the name.

The next moment, I felt something inside me exposed, or rather, burst out. My observation of myself was no longer humanoid, my mind was so confused that it was almost impossible to form a logic, but I still observed from a wonderful perspective that the inside of the inhuman-shaped "self" was torn apart, and there was an equally indescribable object with scaly claws, and a huge eyeball opened in this indescribable thing, as if scarlet blood and tears were shed. The blood filled the inhuman outline of "me" from within, penetrating every tiniest structure, exerting unimaginable force to reshape my original form.

But, just the form, everything inside me has been completely replaced by these scarlet things. I suddenly realized that the "self" that I could feel and be sure of had become an empty shell with no empty mark, like the file figure above.

The battle that is taking place in the depths of this consciousness is no longer a battle between me and the file, but a conflict between another indescribable thing. What is even more frightening is that this conflict is not what they want to do, but simply when they exist, they will inevitably affect each other. As for me and the file, it is but the product of this casual flow of influence that seems to us to be like a storm, but which is meaningless to these nameless things.

Before I was crushed by the massive drill that fell head-on, the sight of the dark background I had observed was shattered. By the time I realized my existence again, I had returned to the underground hall. Everything in front of me seemed to be frozen in the moment before I walked on my consciousness, and yet I knew very well that both I and the file had undergone irreversible, complete, uncontrollable and chaotic inner changes.

I felt nauseous, as if I had been stuffed into an extremely narrow space where I could not even stretch my limbs, forced to curl up, and all my facial features were blocked, but from a human point of view, I could still see with my eyes, smell with my nose, taste with my tongue, hear with my ears, feel with my skin, understand and imagine with my mind, and discern with my heart, as if everything was still the same as before. Only the feeling of the narrow squeeze reverberates in the senses every moment, and the cage that squeezes me is an invisible phantom, which can only be felt and cannot be touched.

For a long time, I couldn't break free from the terrible sights, feelings, thoughts, and imaginations that had existed before, and I couldn't even think about whether I was myself or not, and what the so-called "self" was. The only measure of my own existence is no longer any kind of philosophical philosophy, but my recognition of the name "Takakawa" and the responsibilities that come with it. "Takakawa" is my past, my present, my future, and I deeply feel that if I can't firm this point, then the meaning of my own existence will lose its foothold, and my perception of myself will no longer exist, although it does not mean death, but in the sense that I can understand, it is not much different from death.

I felt like a piece of porcelain that had been broken, forcibly pieced together, stitched together from within, forcibly squeezed or pulled out of shape. My fragility is no longer measurable in terms of willpower or physical weakness, but it is very real to me.

I didn't expect it to come to such a point. I couldn't have predicted this, but did the "river" and the "virus" anticipate it? Is the "third party" who I think is involved in this apocalyptic fantasy that the "virus" and "Jiang" can't know? I don't know, but from what has happened, the impact is there, and it is so profound, that it proves in an indisputable way that my judgment of the Torchlight's deviation ritual is correct - the result of this ritual is definitely not a good result.

The file was right in front of me, however, I could no longer feel her presence, even though her form was still intact, and she still had all the characteristics of life, including breathing and heartbeat, but this biological proof of being alive could no longer be proof that the file was still alive. The death of the file is even more terrible than Billy's death.

Although the file now looks like a so-called vegetative person, and as if the consciousness of those whose consciousness has been destroyed by the impact of the repeater collision, I know that the file is worse than the other two, and more irretrievable than any kind of death I know. I had tried to kill her so that she would not be a sacrifice of the ritual, or at least not an unplanned and irretrievable death, however, I had failed.

This is a complete failure.

The file was still a sacrifice to the ritual of deviation. I don't know if if her plan really succeeds, if she has another chance of resurrection.

And, I'm pretty sure that the mutation that happened to the file wasn't over yet. The super-scale, unimaginable, indescribable mystery, the cold weirdness that can only be described as greatness, will definitely have an impact on the file beyond the level of consciousness. Even, even now, when the inside of the file is completely melted by the chaos, that terrible influence will still radiate outward through the form of the "file".

And I'm not sure how I can end this radiation - completely erasing the material form of the file is not something I can do, but simply killing her biologically is absolutely impossible to end it all.

The progress of the Deviation Ritual will be greatly enhanced by the sacrifice of the file.

"That's a real nuisance." I think that for the sake of today's solution, only "river" or "virus" can solve it. However, I no longer feel the existence of the "river", as if it has sunk back to the bottom of the abyss.