During the day, after Sakuya and Hakkei go to school, Tomie and Sakagawa will come to the door, but in fact, there is nothing particularly important to do, most of the time just get together, chatting, analyzing information, watching TV, it is a fairly peaceful daily life. The city is basically under the surveillance of whisperers, although there is no guarantee to prevent the occurrence of "mystery", nor can all "mysteries" be placed in observation, but from the perspective of the overall changes in the city, the changes brought about by the diffusion of mystery are quite gentle, and the number of police officers is not on the scale, that is, the vicious crime rate has not increased on a large scale, and when walking at night, it will not encounter inexplicable enemies that cannot be measured by common sense from time to time, as well as those events caused by mysterious forces.

When the weirdness spreads in the city, the urban rumors also rise, and when these rumors are heard and believed by many people, they tend to accelerate the spread of the weird, and the two complement each other, and it is easy to detect the direction of the wind from the various details by observing people's speech and the local news tabloids. As the mystery spreads, rumors begin to appear in the city, such as the effects of the Whisperers' actions, which are also part of these rumors, and they account for the vast majority. It is precisely because of this that it can be concluded that the whole city is under the control of the whisperers, and there are no strange stories that are better than the limelight of the whisperers for the time being, and naturally there is no mystery of zài creating these strange stories.

Although the calm is probably only superficial, and I don't know how many intrigues and weirdness are brewing in the interior, and it will not last long, I still enjoy the calm time after the mysterious events that followed. Especially that night, when the crazy weed-like thoughts in my mind were finally sorted out, the peace of mind seemed to take me back to the time when I first came into contact with the mystery. I felt like I was getting a little lazy, like the calm feeling of greed, even so. I still insist on a night trip with Tomie and the two of them every night, after everyone in the house is asleep. Sometimes Sagawa would be with the two of us, but she always seemed to be busy with many things, and she often couldn't stand the fact that Tomie and I had nothing to do. She is very sad about the effects of the mysterious diffusion, which is not to say that I am not permissive, but she is more "conscientious" than me in her attitude and actions.

The tranquility of the city. can't give Zuo Chuan a sense of peace of mind, but instead keep herself busy, it seems that it can make her feel at ease. I think she needs Dr. Ruan Li's diagnosis and treatment more than I do now. Sakuya and Hakkei are both ordinary people, and most of the time, they can't be used for anything other than bringing information about the school, and they've encountered mysteries. There is also a curiosity about mystery, however. Being motivated doesn't mean you can succeed, especially when it comes to mysteries, where they don't know much about the mysteries, but they can't grasp what matters most. In Zuo Chuan's words, it's half a bucket of water, but I don't mind that they are half a bucket of water all the time. As an ordinary person, it is often extremely dangerous to be involved in mysterious events, but in this world, people are always in widespread danger, what danger. What more severe than the coming of the apocalypse? Presumably, the female teacher and the female maître seem to be more useful based on their own experiences, especially after the two of them used the NOG-adjusted electronic demon summoning program and became electronic demon messengers, just in terms of strength, they already have the ability to solve mysterious events. But which is safer to use the electronic demon summoning program to gain power compared to being an ordinary person all the time? I think it's the latter, especially after seeing the monsters in the depths of Nightmare Las Vegas.

The Electro Demon Messenger has been growing, especially in the Las Vegas area, at a terrifying rate. Even so, rumors of "electronic demons" and "nightmares" grew to the point where many ordinary people who had not been exposed to these factors began to waver. Naturally, the government is extremely vigilant about this, and has taken various measures to confirm the truth and try to use its strength to weave a new order, and the NOG has also made more substantive contacts with governments in this environment. I'm not interested in their actions, but I don't think they're going to fail, and unless the Nazis and Shinrikyo have brainwashed everyone, there's no way to stop the NOG from infiltrating government departments, and Cyberball has an extraordinary amount of experience in this area.

The world is changing, and people are consciously or unconsciously catering to such changes, and in Europe and the United States, the turmoil at the level of social movements is more intense than in Asia, but Asia, especially the Central Principalities, is also inevitably drawn into the maelstrom. Of course, with my understanding of the direction of the world, no matter what the reason, actively or passively, to adapt to this turbulent environment, most people cannot escape the tragic end, and it is not people's own ability and behavior that determines whether they can survive, but only depends on the existence of zài - "river" and "virus" that they cannot recognize. There is a huge gap in nature, so that the human beings who think of themselves as the protagonists of the world will become meaningless things.

This is a pessimistic perspective, but it is also a more realistic perspective than optimism. Doomsday Fantasy, no matter how many times it reorganizes reincarnation, has never escaped the fiddling of the "script" once, and people's lives here, whether good or bad, have only one result in the end. The truth of the end of the world, in this world, is real, and it is closer than anywhere else.

I've always been bitter and sad about it, and I've been haunted by all the bad and even worse thoughts and feelings that have come out of it, but now, I'm at peace. After that nightmare, I felt like I had figured it out, and naturally used my daily attitude to face these obviously collapsing worlds, as if I felt that this kind of collapse was a part of daily life. This change in mentality is a bit abrupt, and it seems to be the same as my past self, but there are many subtle differences, at least, I can always confirm that my past self will definitely think about it. At this point, your attitude is incorrect. However, I don't feel repulsed because I am "incorrect".

This calm, as usual, attitude towards the coming of the end does not interfere with the whisperer's set of plans. I still patrol the city at night in an attempt to save something. He also knew that everything he did was useless, but he never had the idea of "stopping this useless work". I rationally analyze what I'm doing, and I feel like I'm doing everyday things in my daily life, such as going to school as a student, eating three meals a day, and doing it even if I don't think about why. Even, even when I do it, I rarely think about why I do it. Because, thinking about these daily routines, there will be a thousand kinds of ideas and truths, so complicated that people don't know where to go deeper, and which ones will be involved. Knowledge that you can't figure out. Yes, because "it's so troublesome that it's dizzying". For ordinary people, even if they study it all their lives, they will not get a final and perfect conclusion, let alone care about this conclusion, so they don't think deeply.

Just know the conclusive things such as "students should go to school" and "it's better to eat three meals a day". Then follow it naturally, take action, and it is enough. Doing so may not make life better, but not doing it makes it better for sure. tends to be worse, doesn't it?

Probably, this is my attitude towards the existence of "Jiang", the problem of the end of the world, and the various situations derived from it.

After examining the report, Dr. Nguyen Li told me in a very heavy tone during another evening of psychological treatment: This is not a sign that my condition has improved, but whether it will make my psychological state worse will have to be observed for a longer time, but one thing is very certain, my psychological numbers have produced a huge amount of changes, and in her past research experience, The results of such changes are often not good.

"Maybe you don't remember, Achuan." Dr. Nguyen Li stared at me and said, "This kind of psychological mutation has happened to you twice in the past. She stretched out two fingers, put one away, and said, "The first time, the first time you showed severe psychopathic tendencies, that was the dividing line between you as a mildly mentally ill person and a severely mentally ill person, and you completed this transformation almost overnight, as if a string in your head had finally broken." When she said this, I couldn't help but feel that I was in the reality of the hospital, because her description, just like what I knew about "Gao Chuan" in the reality of the hospital—I can't confirm how much of this memory is true—what Dr. Ruan Li said now seems to be reflecting some of the things that happened to Gao Chuan in the reality of the hospital.

I remained silent, like a gloomy patient facing a doctor who had announced a bad outcome. I think my mood should be gloomy, because neither what Dr. Ruan Li said nor what was faintly reflected was not a happy situation. But in fact, I confirm that my mood fluctuations have not changed at all, and I am calm and full of weirdness.

"The second time." Dr. Nguyen Le put away his second finger: "It was when we had our last practical sex therapy. Your mental problems, like those of most mental patients, are quite mild at first appear, and you have only one type of condition. However, when your mental problems suddenly flare up and become severe, multiple complications arise. According to the observation records, there were as many as 35 overt psychopathies in you prior to the experimental therapy, and there were also invisible symptoms that were difficult to pinpoint the number of types. There are so many complications that normal treatment simply cannot be carried out. Dr. Nguyen Li said this, looking a little irritable, pressed and unloaded the cap of the pen, and repeated it several times before continuing: "So, I decided to do the opposite. Ah Chuan, you know, not all psychopathologies cause problems in daily life, and even if they cause problems, there is a difference in the process. So, I decided to channel one of the most obvious and intense psychopaths, but with relatively little impact on daily life, to suppress the other psychiatric symptoms. Make you look at least a little normal on the surface. And this is a treatment that does not treat the symptoms or the root cause, and it is only implemented to allow you to live in a state close to that of a normal person, and it will not essentially improve your mental problems. At this point, she paused and said, "Perhaps, it will only make her condition worse...... How in the end. At the time, it was an unknown that I couldn't confirm. ”

"Mom, you mean, the changes I have now have to do with the treatment at that time?" I have a vague feeling that Dr. Nguyen Le is implying such a statement.

Dr. Ruan Li's expression suddenly became more depressed than he had ever been. As if he had lost all his strength, he leaned back in his chair and said, "Yes, I think so." At that time, the treatment did achieve the expected results, and your behavior in daily life was not much different from that of ordinary people, but I have never been able to confirm it. Is this improvement superficial or deeper? In the depths of the psyche that governs your actions, there is a change happening, and I know that it is bound to happen, but I am not sure how it will change and how it will eventually become, until it becomes explicit. This is an extremely long time. It lasted for three years. Now, your situation. Let me know the results of this change. ”

"But it doesn't have to be bad, does it? Mom. I looked at her calmly, and I knew that this was just the observation and observation of the "Gao Chuan" confined to this world by Dr. Ruan Li in this repeater world, and the results of the observations he obtained, which was full of limitations in itself. If it is related to the reality of the hospital, it is more like an allusive description of some profound change.

"Yes. But experience tells me that the odds of being a bad thing are very high. Dr. Nguyen Le avoided my gaze, as if in shame, "Do you remember what kind of psychopathy was the core of the experimental therapy?" ”

"I don't remember." I say. Those who were treated at the time. It's not who you are now.

"Cognitive impairment." "In more detail, it's the split personality in cognitive impairment, and in more detail, it's trying to have a controllable split personality. I want to guide the split personality in your head with a fixed template, which also means that every time you split the personality, it is like a template is created, however, for some complex reasons, these personalities will have gaps in details, but, in general, people will not feel the gap in behavior, and even if they do, they will only think that it is a normal change. ”

At this point, Dr. Nguyen Li fell silent again, and I didn't speak, because she obviously hadn't finished her sentence and didn't feel like she needed my question. Dr. Ruan Li just wants to say everything, as if to vent the pressure in her heart, as a psychiatrist, she naturally has psychological pressure, I think at this time, I should play a listener. And the templated personality splitting she talked about also gave me a very strong sense of immediacy, probably because I couldn't help but think of the personality rotation of "Gao Chuan" and the parallel personality at this moment.

"Ah Chuan, all along, your psychological growth, from a certain point of view, is actually fake, not linear." Dr. Nguyen Li said: "Your growth is just replacing the previous template personality with a templated personality, because the uncontrollable nuances between the templates create the illusion of growth. Whether it is the shaping of the template, or the time of personality splitting and replacement time, it is through treatment methods such as guò drugs and hypnosis, etc., to maintain a fairly rigorous process. She finished speaking in one breath and stared at me, as if trying to see something in my face, but my mood was always calm, and it seemed that this calmness made her breathe a sigh of relief. She pinched the bridge of her nose and said a little tiredly: "This is the case with you, in fact, you already knew, but you just forgot about it, probably because the self-protection function of the human body itself is working." However, for the sake of the present, I have decided to sue you for these things, but it is not for the sake of harming you. Do you believe me? Achuan. ”

"I've always believed in you, Mom." I smiled at her because, I think, a smile is the best answer to her. I never blamed her, and there was no reason to do that. Assuming that I had not arrived, then the "Gao Chuan" of this world in the past would not have blamed Dr. Nguyen Li for this.

"Thank you...... Thank you. On this night, Dr. Nguyen Li's mental state was much weaker than usual, and she pressed her hands to her face, as if she was crying but didn't want people to see her.

"I think the change you have now is due to the backlash caused by the experimental therapy at the time, the subtle mutation of the controllable split personality reached a certain extreme, and at the same time, the high repression of concurrent psychopathy. To put it simply, the personality template has been modified by your underlying psychopathology, which is designed to relieve stress and achieve a dynamic balance of multiple psychopaths, which is what I predicted when I first started the experimental therapy for you. The problem is that the modified personality template, which is the result of multiple psychopathic influences, will inevitably manifest itself in your behavior. You must know that Ah Chuan, those plural psychopaths that have been deliberately suppressed are extremely bad things. Dr. Nguyen Le was also saddened to emphasize here: "At least it's worse than a split personality." ”

Although Dr. Nguyen Li felt that every qiē would become bad, as far as my own feelings were concerned, except that my mind and mind were a little calm, I did not interfere with my own actions. I didn't kill people at will, and I didn't talk nonsense like a madman. I think this calm attitude should be able to dispel her worries one after another. I take my medicine regularly every day according to Dr. Nguyen Li, and I rarely go out during the day except in the middle of the night. Because, there is no need to do those things that will cause people to worry.

John Bull and I had a deal that required me to travel to Europe as much as possible to find clues about the Doomsday Shinrikyo and interfere with their actions as much as possible. Of course, the NOG will also fully share this information and provide logistical support. At that time, the agreed time was to leave in three days, but my mental changes made the trip have to be postponed again, and unless there was enough time to observe and obtain a considerable number of measurements to prove that my behavior did not cause social problems, Dr. Nguyen Le probably would not let me go out. In her words, I am now like an unconfirmed, possibly time-bombed package. It is not clear at all what factors will trigger those irrational attacks. Although the murder of mentally ill people is not held legally responsible, Dr. Nguyen Le did not want me to be thrown into a psychiatric hospital, put on a restraint suit, and imprisoned in a small dark room. I don't want innocent people to lose their lives because of my actions.

The human society in this world has been in turmoil, but it has not yet expanded to the point of completely subverting the original order and concepts. It is very immoral and unlawful to arbitrarily allow a mentally ill person who may pose a threat to the lives of others to go out.

Dr. Nguyen Le won't let me go out at will, and if I avoid her leaving, it will cause a lot of problems – maybe not for my movements, but for the other person – I can't ignore them, and I have peace of mind, which means that I won't do things against my will. I didn't mention to Dr. Nguyen Le that I was going to Europe, but the whisperers were ready internally. Sakiya and Hachijing still have to go to school, and they don't have the ability to deal with the mystery, of course, they can't run around casually, and some of the actions of the city headquarters need to be maintained by manpower, although John Bull said that it will be assisted by some members of the network ball in the NOG team, but in order to reconcile the action, it still needs a strong enough whisperer member to lead the affairs of the mainland, and its selection has also been decided to be in charge of Zuo Chuan, with a female teacher and a female foreman as deputies. Tomie was left alone with me.

Then, on the fourth day, Dr. Nguyen Le was invited by a circle of activity in the field of psychology to participate in a more personal seminar, and the destination was in Europe. For many reasons, she couldn't excuse me and couldn't leave me at home, which she felt was dangerous. When she's there, it's okay to rest assured that even Sakiya and Hakkei live at home, but if she feels like she's gone, I'll. (To be continued......)