"You canned kings, the more you raise, the more you shrink!" Everyone is seizing the moment of tranquility in the early morning to memorize some things that need to be memorized, but they don't want to be disturbed by a thunderous roar The good mood of the day, needless to say, they also know that it is Brother Tai who has arrived.

"Who came here to eat in the classroom early in the morning for self-study?" Brother Tai made a proud voice as if he was interrogating a prisoner, and there was silence below.

"Admit it yourself, if I am allowed to say it, I will not have your good fruit to eat." Brother Tai lifted his glasses, and his eyes swept back and forth with a fierce light.

"No one admits it, does it?" Tygo's tone gradually turned, ready to turn into a high-pitched burst.

"Shi Duoduo, could you please get up and explain, what did you eat in the morning?" Brother Tai's voice changed from high to low, and the change in tone was unpredictable and terrifying.

Xiaoshi lowered his head and stood up, and said in a stumbling voice: "It's not yet early self-study, I'll eat some crispy noodles!" ”

"It's not good to study early in the morning, and chewing crispy noodles in class is not nutritious. Now the food in our canteen has improved, dumplings and noodles have everything, go to the canteen to eat! ”

"I, I, I was wrong!" Little Stone stammered as he expressed his remorse.

Maybe it's because of his first offense, maybe it's because Brother Tai ate dumplings this morning, in short, he was in a very good mood, and he said lazily to Xiaoshi: "Don't take it as an example, sit down, tell you these little rabbits, give me honesty in the classroom in the future, my family is expected to be telescope, and I can see your every move in the classroom clearly." ”

Everyone was quite disdainful in their hearts, this move was obviously suspected of knocking the mountain and shocking the tiger, and it was intended to inform us not to make small moves in the classroom, and everything was under her control.

Everyone was muttering in their hearts, those who dared to make small moves in the classroom were Shen Muze, Tian Da Donkey, Xiong Shengnan and others, and who dared to do it, if they were caught, they would not be killed.

"Good thing she doesn't have a sniper step!" The golden fat man lowered his head and answered, his voice was not loud, but it caused a commotion in the back rows.

Brother Tai glanced at this side and said, "Jin Zhongren, you stand up for me, what did you just say?" ”

The fat golden man muttered mentally: Isn't this my mouth owing, why do I have nothing to say this sentence for.

But he couldn't hide, the voice he said just now was not loud, and it was expected that even if Brother Tai heard it, he couldn't hear it clearly, so Jin Zhongren casually made up a sentence: "There is no dumpling vinegar in the canteen this morning!" ”

As soon as the golden fat man said this, the last few rows exploded, this is our most scarce resource in the 21st century, talent!

Brother Tai paused for a moment, but he didn't criticize the behavior of the fat man Jin for answering.

"If not, just reflect it to the canteen owner, the dumplings have been eaten, don't worry about whether there is vinegar or not, you can sit down!"

The golden fat man is the only one who dares to ridicule Brother Tai in person but retreats with his whole body in front of him, there must be no ancients in the past, and there should be no one in the future.

The fat golden man sat on the chair with a dizzy head and a flattered look. But the next few rows of classmates quietly gave him a thumbs up and affectionately called him "master".

In our class, all of us can get the title of master, in some aspects of attainments far beyond the others, the golden fat man's spirit of daring to be the first in the world is really worthy of our gratitude, affectionately call him a master absolutely deserved.

From then on, Xiao Dazhi's title for the golden fat man was Master Jin, and there was no second title.

Master Xiao teased the fat man Jin and said: "Master Jin, what flows in your blood is definitely the genes of the North Korean royal family, arrogant and noble and slightly graceful, and it is really difficult for us and other grass people to match." ”

The fat man replied to Xiao Dazhi and said: "That's not as good as your Master Xiao, a legendary big man, with poetry as evidence, two big cheeks and white buttocks, a pair of black ink rolls, too strong and yellow hands, so angry that Brother Tai's face is green." ”

"Hahaha......"

We can't stand up laughing, these are all talents, we can hear different jokes every day in the back seat, and life is very beautiful!

Brother Tai adopts two principles for the division of class seats, one woman before the man, and two counties before the township, which is implemented as follows:

1. I am afraid that there will be some reluctance for men and women to sit together, so I resolutely break the boys and girls, with more women in front and fewer men in the back than women, which is a big principle.

The place where Kim Jung-in sat happened to be the junction of men and women, and because it was a place where men and women were mixed, it became the most active area in my class. There are often people who tell pornographic jokes passionately, such as Tian Da Donkey.

Second, Jin Zhongren was a student in the county town and some township girls, Jin Zhongren came to me as a township classmate, and then I was a classmate who was exiled by Brother Tai and a transfer student designated by the school. In this way, the echelon and grade division are clear and clear, and it has not caused everyone to be disgusted or has it caused a big wave, and it is obvious that Brother Tai's methods have been really moisturizing things silently.

Tell me about my transfer to the back.

Once, I went back to Xiaoyu in the morning self-study and said a few words to Brother Tai, who caught me in the office and criticized me violently, and said a lesson, I was dizzy, Brother Tai saw this, borrowed the slope and got off the donkey, and said: "Punish you to sit in the back, you and Yue Peng will change seats, and you will be transferred back after three months." ”

I secretly rejoiced that I was finally allowed to leave the demon cave, and if I didn't hear your chatter, I would be transferred to the back, but after three months, Brother Tai never mentioned the matter of transferring me back, as if I was exiled to the far north of the border and was no longer allowed to enter Beijing.

Fan Xiaoyu laughed at me a lot for this, people who were transferred to the back were all reading novels that were not suitable for children, playing games with Wenqu stars, influencing others in class, and seriously violating discipline or something, anyway, I was the first person in our class to talk about this time, of course, there will be fifteen in the first year of junior high school, although I am the first but not the last, the so-called crime that wants to be added is no excuse.

But it's good in the back, there are Liu Fatzi, Xiao Dazhi, Jin Fatman, Tian Dadon and other people who are stirring together and nonsense, which can be regarded as a white porridge with pickles, which has a little taste.

As for why the fat man with a strong family did not move to the front, I analyzed that there are two reasons, one is that this guy is lazy and does not like to sit in the front; Second, he is looking for someone to talk about every day, even if he is transferred to the front, he has to be transferred back for two days.

When I first entered the first class, I sat in the middle of the class and was assigned to a table with Chen Moyu.

"Hello, my name is Chen Moyu, and I will call you Xiaolong in the future." Chen Moyu staggered to his feet and welcomed me, a new tablemate. He was tall and thin, and his T-shirt was like a flagpole with a bunting that would float up at any time if it was windy.

"Hello, we will be at the same table in the future, please take care of me." I politely reached out to shake his hand.

"Damn, they're all classmates, why are you so polite." Chen Moyu didn't stretch out his hand to respond, but he did hammer a punch on my shoulder, which was considered to have "hit" me to say hello. After taking a seat, Chen Moyu and I started talking.

"Eh, Xiaolong, I'm writing an article and preparing to submit it in the near future, you can order it for my school!" Chen Moyu showed his two white front teeth and said to me, as if we had been classmates for a long time, so that I quickly integrated into the group of the class.

"There's no problem, but my language is not very good, I can't talk about correction, and I can help you check if there are sentences that don't make sense." The first class is indeed Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, and when I first came in, I met someone who wanted to write an article and submit it, which was really a mountain up.

"Then it's hard for you." Saying that, Chen Moyu handed me his article, entitled "The Wind That Never Stops", which is a lyrical prose, written on manuscript paper for more than three pages, the font is strong and powerful, and at first glance it is the essence of willow characters. I pointed out a few inconsistencies in sentences and problems with punctuation, and then Chen Moyu neatly re-copied several copies, sorted them out, sealed them in several envelopes and mailed them to several publishers. About two months later, a publisher wrote back and agreed to publish it for him, and my admiration for this old tablemate was beyond words.

Chen Moyu has an almost paranoid hobby for Chinese, and often takes out 300 Tang poems in self-study classes, and turns a page to recite with me. Even when he returned to the dormitory, he and Xiao Shi were still discussing which martial arts of Jin Yong and Gu Long were well written, but his views were more unique and he liked Gu Long, which caused us Jin Yong martial arts fans to be dissatisfied, so that they often sat together to argue, and our Jin Yong faction representative Xiao Shi was like the surging water of the Yellow River when discussing Jin Yong's martial arts, endlessly. was so angry that Chen Moyu had no choice but to take out Xiaoshi's performance in Chinese class and ridicule him.

One evening after self-study, I went downstairs to find Master Xiao and they chatted, and when I saw Chen Moyu shaking his head in the bathroom, I asked curiously: "Chen Moyu, what are you doing, what are you shaking your head for?" ”

"Brush your teeth!" Chen Moyu stopped shaking his head, spit out the water in his mouth and said to me.

"He doesn't use the muscles in his cheeks to rinse his mouth, so he just shakes his head." Little Stone answered my doubts directly, and after saying that, Little Stone and I both laughed.

"My cheek muscles won't contract, and it's stronger than your ** muscle control, it's an hour to squat in the toilet, last time Master Xiao had diarrhea, you occupied the pit and didn't, and people rushed to the toilet on the second floor." Chen Moyu was not to be outdone, and he pinched Xiaoshi.

"Master Xiao, if he doesn't squat in the pit three times a day, he feels that life is meaningless, and it's really hard to say whether he pulls it out or not." Xiao Shi said cheaply.

"That's much stronger than if you squat in a pit once a day, once a day."

"It's all Jin Yong's fault, you can't blame me for this."

"You're careful of hemorrhoids."

"Dare to ask Xiao Shi, have you watched too much martial arts and used squatting to squat in the toilet?" I also want to tease Little Rock.

"Don't say it, sometimes when you squat numb, you really have to move!"

"Who's here to speak ill of me?" Master Xiao walked in with a few crumpled scrolls.

"Prepare to go to the toilet, the ink is poisonous!" Chen Moyu teased Master Xiao.

"Master Xiao's is a steel grub, and you can use a paper shell to go to the toilet." Little Stone laughed as he spoke.

"I thank you for not squawing in the toilet today, saving a pit for the masses." Master Xiao clenched his fists and said at the small stone.

Hahaha......

Many years after the dream, Chen Moyu became a Chinese teacher and lived up to his love for language paranoia.

In the first English class, the school considered that our class was a class, and assigned us with the English teacher with the highest English proficiency in the school to participate in the battle, and it is said that he is the only teacher in the school who has a special English teacher certificate.

"My English teaching must break the convention, break through the traditional education, let's start to play games, guess the word, whose turn is it today? Tian Boguang, come up. The English teacher rushed to the classroom out of breath five minutes after the class bell rang, turned on the projector and called Tian Donkey to the computer and started playing games.

"Here!" Talking between the big donkey fart ran to the podium, playing games and driving to hit the word This live field donkey likes to do it the most, driving in front of the computer, a total of 20 words hit 9 of the right, it took 10 minutes.

Seeing this, I can't help but think of a sentence from the big donkey: I have a very good sense of language, and words are not my strong point!

The big donkey's performance today perfectly validated his words, and it seems that the big donkey also has a time to be honest.

"As you can see, we need to be entertaining, to be able to fully mobilize everyone's enthusiasm for learning, and to be able to check the level of memory of words, killing two birds with one stone, and this is where we innovate in education, and I recently wrote an article on English teaching, which is a good example. With that much to digress, let's start today's lesson. As he spoke, he opened his English book, and there were still 25 minutes before the end of class.

I saw my sorrow in my dream, I only scored 99 points in English in the college entrance examination, and Master Xiao, who was lower than me, scored 96 points, and Shao Sijie scored 93 points, I think all this is a dream, as long as I study hard, I will definitely be able to do well, such a self-comfort method instantly dilutes the inexplicable sadness.

Here is an introduction to Shao Sijie, everyone who has seen him knows that the most impressive thing is his head and head shape that resemble Einstein, and he is a particularly strong student in science at first glance.

Shao Sijie has a wide range of knowledge, and when he speaks, he is always eloquent and unfathomable, which is very different from Master Xiao's easy to understand!

Chen Moyu once jokingly called Shao Sijie's head an African savannah - there are many lions (lice) on it.

Many years after the dream, Shao Sijie became a senior software engineer, which is worthy of his head shape.

It seems that our future pictures are also topological extensions and interweaving of today's signs, and our various behaviors today will become the warp and weft of the future pictures, inadvertently outlining the context of the future, and the rest of the pictures will be gradually filled by us in the future. We are consciously or unconsciously weaving our own future lives and present lives, mortals do not have the insight of the Buddha, thinking that everything is the arrangement of fate, in fact, our feet are stepping on the lead of our yesterday's extension, and we need to use wisdom and perseverance to constantly correct the direction it points to.

After school in the afternoon, Dongdong took an English tape and brought it over, her smile with the warmth of the sun, which made me unconsciously want to get close to her.

The fat man split his sunflower face and said, "Eh, good beauty, come and ask questions, come and see if my brother can help you with something?" ”

Dong Dong grabbed the fat man's ears and twisted around and said, "You hurry up and make room for me, what are you talking about here if you don't go home for dinner after school!" ”

"Kill someone, Brother Long, help!" The fat willow let out a howl like killing a pig.

"Take out your Walkman and spare you from dying!" Dongdong said with a giggle.

"You ask Brother Long about this, I don't know where to put it."

I slapped the fat man on the back and said, "Then it's nothing to do with you, you can go with confidence!" ”

"Eh, you can't partner up to bully me, beware of me suing the teacher for you!" Fat Willow smiled lewdly at me, then twisted his big ass and left.

After Fat Liu left, Dongdong sat down, shook the tape he was holding in front of my nose and said, "I recorded a few classic old songs, do you want to listen to them together?" ”

"Scared me, I really thought it was for me to listen to English."

"I'm tired of listening to the English of this tape, and it's a pity to throw it away, so it's better to record it as a song."

"What a hard boy, look at it, I'll just say you're okay with English!" I have already plugged in the headphones while talking, and it cost more than 1,000 yuan for the boy to buy a walkman, but the high-end goods are good, there are two headphone jacks, and one person and a pair of headphones do not need to pull the wire to share.

We both lay on the table and looked at each other, I winked at Dongdong, who grabbed the book and still said on my head, "Don't be, listen to the song!" ”

I pressed the play button and listened to the prelude from the headphones, which was the ending song "Dream Chaser" of "Snow Mountain Flying Fox", maybe this song touched my nostalgic mood, maybe it was the lyrics that infected my thoughts, at this moment I stared blankly at Dongdong's long hair hanging down and fell into deep thought, at this moment she exuded a kind of breath that fascinated me, I really wanted to fall asleep, a dream that never woke up.

The next thing I put on seems to be "Always Hello in the World" from "The Legend of the Condor Heroes", and then I have no memory of what I played, and I completely fell into the tune of "Dream Chaser" and couldn't extricate myself.

Fat Liu's Walkman is a high-end product that doesn't need to be changed manually, but after a brief break, I woke up from my contemplation and found that Dongdong had been blinking at me with her big eyes flickering.

I took off my headphones and said to her, "I still want to listen to that dreamer, let's rewind and listen again, okay?" ”

Dongdong straightened her hair and said to me, "That's what I just wanted to say to you." ”

In this way, the two of us kept rewinding and relistening and relistening silly, until the fat man came back from eating.

Fat Liu took off one of my earphones from behind and put it in his ear: "What are you listening to, when you eat, aren't you hungry?" ”

I stretched and stood up and said, "You're so annoying!" ”

After listening to it for a while, the fat man threw the headphones to me and said, "You still listen to such an old song, it's boring!" I knew you two were tired of it, but I didn't expect to really haven't eaten, look at what I brought? ”

Fat Liu threw the plastic bag on the table, I opened it to see that our dormitory students love fried chicken nuggets, small dragon buns and siu mai, I gave a thumbs up to Fat Liu and said, "Interesting!" ”

"Okay, let's eat and go to class right away, I'll go to the toilet and tell the beauty to make room for me when I come back."

I put away my Walkman and headphones, and began to clean up the delicious food brought by the fat man, Dongdong ate with oil all over my hands, wiped it directly on my face several times, wiped it clean and giggled and ran back to my seat.

My embarrassed state happened to be seen by the fat man, and the laughing fat man clapped his hands: "You also have today, it's really happy!" ”

As soon as the fat man shouted like this, Tian Da Donkey also saw it: "Brother Long, it's not a shame to have a little lipstick mark on your face, you don't need to wipe it so hard." ”

"Donkey, what's the matter with the red on your neck?" I threw the paper that wiped my face directly at Tian Da Donkey.

The big donkey dodged my paper ball, touched his neck and said, "You said this, you were bitten by mosquitoes last night, where did you want to go!" ”

Tian Dadonkey's facial expression did not fluctuate when he spoke, and he couldn't guess the truth of his words at all, I think this kung fu is not practiced, but innate, and others can't learn it if they want to.

Tingting heard me say this, and glanced back at Tian Da Donkey, who quickly retracted his neck and sat on the chair.

Without waiting for Tian Da Donkey to sit firmly, Chang Jian said: "The mosquito bite should be a bag, what is the matter with your neck not only not being a bag but still being red?" ”

"Eh, I said Chang Jian, you are really cheap, can't I wrap it up?"

Master Xiao couldn't stand it anymore, and stood up for the big donkey and said: "Donkey, you don't have to hide anything with the little, what you need to explain is why a mosquito can have a mouth as big as a human!" ”

I laughed and said, "You're going to be embarrassed, you'll have to find a biology teacher to give the final answer." ”

Chang Jian still said cheaply: "It must be a female mosquito that bites you, do you know why?" Donkey skin Ejiao is a big supplement! ”

Tian Dadonkey was ridiculed by a few of us so miserably, and finally had to say: "I said a few brothers, is there any end?" After a while, Brother Tai came in and it was all over! ”

……

If one day you find my dream, please be kind to him, because I will spend my life trying to find it until I die!