Although Youjiang keeps saying "I don't understand why I want my left eye", and she didn't have a left eye in the first place, I'm pretty sure that the eye of the moon will become her left eye again if she needs to, but, on the other hand, she should be serious when she tries to get my left eye. Although she "didn't understand", she had actually been guided to know how to get the left eye.

"Eat it." Youjiang looked at me and urged: "Eat meat, eat meat, eat meat, eat it all, eat it all in one go, bite the bones, swallow them, squeeze out all the blood in them, and drink them." ”

When they saw that I didn't move, they said, "Don't you want to eat?" Is it because eating meat that looks like human hands makes you feel psychologically uncomfortable? It doesn't matter, I have a better reason. The hideous smile resurfaced from her face again, "You who are barely here can only have more possibilities if you eat this right hand, don't you want to defeat me?" Or kill me? It's fine no matter what, but if you don't eat it, it's absolutely impossible to do it. ”

Yes, possibility. I am also very aware of the possibility that Youjiang said. My thinking and intuition tell me that it is precisely because I have a left eye that I can eat this right hand and gain the power of this right hand. Youjiang made a heavy bet, not a risk, but she was confident that she could win the blockage bet, in theory, her idea of this is unstable, and it is indeed the only hope that I can hold on to while the four heavenly courtyards are silent.

Even so, I didn't eat it.

The fourth-level magic pattern constructed a long knife in my left hand. I swung it and chopped off my right palm. Then, with Youe's surprised and malicious smirk, I attached the palm of her right hand to the severed limb - just as Mae gouged out my old left eye and installed hers. From now on. My right hand is also "Jiang".

Just as I was thinking this, my left eye began to twitch, as if it had experienced a hundred thousand times of severe pain, as if the optic nerve had a consciousness of its own, and with its own strength it took root in the muscles. Spread, this penetrating, wisps of pain spread downward, around the back of the head, over the cheeks, into the neck, to the shoulders, and then to the arms, to the bones. The muscles, the blood vessels, the nerves, all began to twitch in this painful force, and half of my body was already paralyzed in pain, but the presence of my wrists and palms became clearer and clearer, and what spread from my arms connected to my wrists. The fingers involuntarily move quickly, and the swing of the anti-joints makes people feel it. Whether the knuckles are broken, or whether there are no bones at all.

I don't think it's my own subconscious behavior, hidden in the depths of my body and consciousness, in such a weird way that I can't deny its existence. However, I also don't think it's Youjiang. It is definitely not Youjiang who controls the movement of the fingers.

I was in pain, still staring at Youjiang, and she really showed a look of surprise, but. The emotionless pupils made people feel that this kind of surprise was just a show.

"I didn't expect it, I didn't expect it." She said, "I didn't understand it, and I didn't expect this kind of thing, but you really have a part of me...... No, it's not so much a part of me as something very similar to me. Isn't that left eye really my delusion? Although I have heard that the Doomsday Shinrikyo also has a similar existence to me, no, it should be said that it is the same thing, which has been divided into parts, and then the part here that has made me. But, Takakawa, judging from your intelligence, you shouldn't have touched that thing at all. ”

She looked thoughtfully at me, who was curled up in pain, and asked again: "Although I have already asked and you have answered, I still want to ask again, Gao Chuan, Gao Chuan in front of me, what are you from?" Maybe you don't want to admit it, but, in my opinion, you're more like me than like what you think you're human. What do you call me? The ultimate weapon? Well, in my eyes, at least 60% of them are also the ultimate weapon. ”

"Do you want to say, I'm your kind?" I endured the pain, because I had endured similar pain in the past, so gradually I felt like I could adapt. The will that drives the left eye and right hand is also receding, putting control back into my hands. I moved my fingers, feeling like I was finally myself again. I am not subjectively disgusted with it presented to me in this way, and even, because I know that it is "Jiang", therefore, I love "Jiang" deeply, of course, I will not resist her, however, as an independent individual, the inherent instinct is obviously a kind of resistance. I sometimes think that it is precisely because of resistance that it is painful and fearful, because this resistance is too small and powerless in the face of its power, like a dying struggle.

"No, of course not of the same kind. Even if there is 60% similarity, it is definitely not the same kind in terms of species. You Jiang said: "Moreover, I have no kind, or in your eyes, the final weapon and the final weapon are the same?" However, here I am indeed an independent individual, not a doppelganger, nor a class of many species, I am one, one, unique. ”

"In that case, why do you want my left eye? Why would you be surprised by my situation? I'm good, and my left eye is similar to you, but it's different. Although you mean that this left eye, as well as the ultimate weapon of the Doomsday Shinrikyo cult, plus you, are independent individuals diverging from the same root being, what is the significance of this relational cognition to you, who do not need to be of the same kind, and do not think that there are kinds? You're a monster, not a human, mentally or physically, you don't need the support of a race, do you? ”

"yes, why? Actually, I don't understand either. I said it, I don't know why. Youjiang repeated: "I just wanted to do this, so I did it, and as for the deeper reasons, I neither thought about it nor planned to think about it." Like now, I can talk when I want, I can talk when I want, no, sometimes. I even did these things without knowing if I really wanted to do them. ”

"No kidding!" I couldn't help but say, "Is your essence a blank slate?" Is it muddy? ”

You Jiang put down the hand that opened his bangs, and his voice did not fluctuate, but he calmly said: "Blank and muddy, aren't they all subjective standards set by people based on people's thoughts and behaviors?" I'm not human. So, any words and meanings used to describe human beings are wrong for me. ”

"So, what the hell are you? If you're speaking human language, you're talking human language that I can understand, so tell me and make it clear in a way that people can understand! "My left eye twitched, but not because of conscious activity, but only by physiological instinct. The pain had not yet fully subsided, but I could already feel the powerful force running through my left eye and right hand at two points and one line, restoring consciousness to the paralyzed half of my body.

“…… I think you're just ignoring a point. You Jiang was silent for a long time, and the voice once again came into my ears from the cosmic void that should have been silent, as if it was the only voice left in my world: "What do you think. When you talk to me, are you talking to people? You hear my voice. Is it human language? ”

"I heard ......" I wanted to say, "Of course we were talking in human language, in human ways", but this self-confidence, after half a sentence, disappeared without a trace—or rather. I thought it was a matter of course, but at this moment, it suddenly felt that it was not so natural.

"Noticed, right?" Youjiang said: "There are no human beings here, and human beings have been lost as a reference. So you don't know how you're changing, you can observe yourself, but the object you compare with after observation is just me. So, let me ask again, Takakawa, do you really know what you are like now, how you are talking to me? I am obviously a monster, but in your eyes, the image of a human is reflected, so am I a human being, or are you a monster and still think you have a human element? ”

Speaking of this, her smiling face became gloomy again, sarcastic, and full of malice: "Obviously, there are only monsters left around, and I obviously admit that they are monsters, but I don't doubt why I can communicate with monsters." It's so funny, you deserve to be a clown, Takakawa. ”

I don't want to think about it, but whether I think or not is no longer a question of whether I want to think or not. The doubts that arose because of Utsue's words piled up, and perhaps as she said, I could still observe my own existence without a reference, but I could not be sure of what kind of situation I was, but from another point of view, because I was not sure what kind of situation I was, I was actually in an intermediate state where I could have become something that was not human, but I could still be human.

Although what she meant was probably that monsters and humans were at both ends of the dividing line, and they couldn't communicate with each other, and it was people who could communicate with people, and only monsters could communicate with monsters. However, in my perception, there is no concrete evidence to prove this. After all, my perception has always been limited to my stupidity. The actions I can take, the ideas I can implement, are limited to my meager understanding.

If there had been an objective, omniscient third person, perhaps I would have been able to determine what kind of situation I was. But even if my experience is a story, a novel, as the third observer of the author and the third observer as the reader, I still am not omniscient and omnipotent for this story, because the story also has the limitations of the story, and it is impossible to present all the details on paper, and the author cannot think through everything thoroughly before writing the story, because even the author who seems to be the "creator" has his own cognitive limitations. Therefore, it is also possible that the author and the reader do not know my real situation at this time.

So, what I call the objective and omniscient third observer is only in the imagination. Until it appears and tells me about it, its existence is both universally meaningful and subjectively meaningless.

I shouldn't have been thinking about this kind of thing at such a time, but my mind was out of control, and it was all in this moment, concentrated in this range, and it was constantly expanding.

Since I had never given up defending with the power of conscious walking from the beginning, my mind was still fragilely linked to vigilance even as it swelled within the confines, and I made it clear to me that I was actually attacked again.

-- This is, mind locked

I didn't want to be in a trance, I wanted to act, but my thoughts couldn't give a clear command to act, and even my body became heavy, as if I was half asleep, trying to wake up, but I couldn't even move a finger.

What a ruthless enemy. Even if I'm not sure if I'm talking to Youjiang or not, it's okay to understand the hidden meaning in those incomprehensible words, and it's not wrong to characterize such behavior as "talking." And the purpose of this "conversation" itself is not to understand the other party, nor to understand one's own situation, but only to judge the situation, and make a containment behavior.

However, "talking" has different effects on each other.

Obviously, it had a bigger impact on me. When the torrent of thoughts I couldn't contain rushed in the same direction, I knew I was going to suffer.

Youjiang disappeared because I couldn't focus on her, so I didn't even realize how she disappeared. Fortunately, there is still a left eye. Under certain circumstances, the left eye, which is not controlled by my subjective consciousness, seems to have self-awareness, and at such times, it is activated by the other party's behavior, which is like a life-saving straw.

In the sharp pain of the convulsions, the left eye turned drippingly, looking to the left and then to the right, not catching up with the disappearing figure, but it made me realize that Youjiang was "not in the field of vision of the left eye", and my intuition told me that she was behind her.

Intuition, at the last moment, launched a quick sweep.

My involuntary body, pushed by the invisible high-speed channel, galloped forward. If Youjiang is behind me, then she must be "unable to catch up" with me, so-

As I thought, when she reappeared, she was already right in front of me.

It's like repeating the last time, we are facing each other, in the same straight line, and we are sprinting towards each other without missing a beat. (To be continued.) )