(Lao Shang's grandmother)

Author: Long Zun Tingbo

The wind is sluggish and the water is cold, and the urine is held for a long time and cystitis.

I have caused a lot of trouble, and I am really a tragic man.

Just when my hair stood up, about to be scared to pump, my sluice gate because half of the water was released, suddenly closed, so that the other half of the ** dropped, gushing out, this splash of urine was not forbidden at all (Northeast dialect waste), all shot on Ya's body, only to hear a scream, at this time look at it around the body, as if it was poured sulfuric acid, white smoke repeatedly floated out, and then rolled all over the ground, and kept shouting: Worship the moon god save me. Then the body evaporated with the white smoke without a trace.

Hallucinations must be fucking hallucinations, these two days of night surfing, hallucinations caused by lack of sleep, let's catch up with them! Then I went back to dream of Zhou Gong, and I kept comforting myself in my heart.

So I put my pants up and chased after my friend in the direction my friend was walking. I caught up with my friends and then came to the bridge with them, my heart was much more steady, because more people can be stronger, and the shape of the four of us, coupled with the same tilt of the head and waiting to watch the meteor shower, is really a bit like a tiger resting and lying down to sleep. In the end, we went from tiger to sb, and we didn't see a single meteor for a long time, so we didn't wait any longer, because the winter night was very cold, and we went back to my old house, and the three of them lay down and snored like dead pigs. But I couldn't sleep, just imagine who experienced such a strange scene just now, and could still sleep, I thought about whether this was real, or hallucination, if it was an illusion, how could it be so real. Then I thought about it, I fell asleep groggily, that night I had a dream, I dreamed that the roof of my house, leaked a boxy hole, I lay on the kang, looking at the sky floating over, a cloud of white clouds, there was a person standing on it, this person said to me: the gods of the three realms, the six souls, know the reason, Shang's door. At this moment, I saw a yellow skin crawling on the edge of the exposed hole, with a wisp of white-gray hair on his back, and his eyes looked at me with green light, that is, three or five seconds of effort, the yellow skin pounced on me from the room, and he was about to pounce in front of me, I suddenly sat up from the kang, it turned out to be a dream, and I was scared to death.

It was already dawn outside, I woke them up, got up and washed their faces, and the four of them were tired of running away because they skipped class, so we went back to school and came to the class, and the teacher saw us, and he didn't speak and continued to read his newspaper on the podium, because there was no need for us to reinvest in our class, so the teacher was mixed up day by day, as long as the salary was in hand, and we were leaned on until graduation, his task was completed. The principal and director have no way to take this campus scenery class, and the teacher just turns a blind eye.

Sun Danren, Zhao Zhiqiang, and Shi Houjian continued to lie on the table and make up for sleep.

I was thinking back to what happened last night and that dream, why that dream was so real, even the old man who stepped on the white clouds, I could remember what he said, I was thinking about it repeatedly, what was going on with the old man's four sentences.

At this time, the glass next to me made a clanging sound, (because I was sitting in a seat by the window, for the convenience of smoking) our class was on the third floor, I opened the window and looked down, only to see, a little boy, take a small stone, throw it up, I asked: What are you doing, there is something wrong with the three madmen.

This man called the Three Crazy Men is also a good friend of mine, the one of our 5 good buddies I mentioned earlier, his name is Shang Kaifeng, one year higher than me, and he has graduated, because he doesn't want to go to school, he didn't continue to go to high school.

Shang Kaifeng (nicknamed the Three Madmen) Because, this kid has a peak character in his name, so we call him the Three Madmen, but this nickname is also well-founded, these three Madmen have three Crazy, crazy riding, crazy fighting, and crazy pickling girls. Usually ride his oil to death rush (road racing motorcycle) in Harbin City, have to run a hundred and twenty or thirty miles, and are not afraid of crashing to death, may be genetic, I heard that when his father was young, riding a motorcycle is the entire Taiping District of Harbin City, famous to the death, many little girls are very, worship his father, his father is also the same as him, pickle girl skills emerge in endlessly, and then when he is older, he opened a motorcycle repair department, I heard that his father has a very good heart, Repairing motorcycles (road races) for those losers has always been half repaired, so that those losers, it didn't take long for them to come to his dad to repair the car, fooling those losers' money, but for some, the poor people who ride the three-wheeled solicitation of Gangtian have always been, one step in place, between washing the car for others, only charging a little money, if the parts are changed, his father will at most, collect a part money, and the manual fees are free for others. Compared with those high-ranking government officials who talk about people and don't do things, eat people and don't people, I don't know if they are tens of thousands of times better than them, so we also respect his father very much.

I saw Shang Kaifeng say to me: You come down! I'm looking for you.

As soon as I saw his eerie smile, I knew I was going to have another mouthful. Ha ha

I walked out of the school building, then came to him, and asked, "There is another offering of fruit to eat, haha."

He was stunned for a moment and then said to me: Relying on you is better than my milk, what is it that you can pinch it.

I said to him, "I'm going to be a fart, and when I look at your bad smile, I know what you're going to."

He looked behind me and said, "It's up to you!" He's it.

I said to him, "Sleep upstairs!" I watched a meteor shower yesterday and didn't sleep well at night. What's good for you, hurry up.

He said to me, "The thing that my grandmother gave to my family has a roast chicken, and we will steal it later." Save it for tomorrow when the five of us go to the riverside.

I thought to myself: I grass, tomorrow the food will be down again, haha.

Accustomed to it, Shang Kaifeng, his grandmother is a horse, that is, to invite the immortal to come up, the family for a family immortal (I don't know if it can really be invited, or fool which people) to give people a fortune to see a doctor, we have been stealing his family's Baojia immortal's fruit to eat since we were young, not so much stealing, it is better to take it, because since he was a child, his grandmother has spoiled him, anyway, the old people say that the child is in good health when he eats the fruit, and his grandmother does not say anything about him when he sees it.

I saw that at this time, he took out a, a big brick mobile phone, at that time it was already very awesome, because I was born in 85, an authentic 80s, when I was in middle school, who had a mobile phone was always looking for crazy, and the return rate was brushed, his family conditions were not bad, he also liked to play, and did not go home all night, his father gave him a mobile phone for his safety, so it was convenient to determine his location. I remember that it seemed to be a card of Shenzhou at the time, and it cost 6 cents to make and receive calls, these are all nonsense for the time being, but I saw him say to the phone: Grass get away, come to me again, for you to step out, I haven't heard my name, Harbin, Boss Shang. He is an only child in his family, his grandmother's side is all younger brothers and sisters, and his grandmother's side is also younger brothers and sisters, no matter where he is the eldest brother, so he calls himself still the eldest to the outside world. There are also some elements of pretense.

I saw him say into the phone again: When you hear my name in the future, quit 10 miles away for me, do you hear it? When I was done, I saw him with the phone in his pocket.

I asked, "Who called, and I didn't hear your phone ring?"

He replied: Do you understand the grass! I'm shaking, where are you listening?

I said to him: "Grass, I believe you have turned on the vibration, if you don't adjust the vibration, and the phone rings again in the middle of the call, it will be difficult to explain."

He glared at me, and didn't refute, because once he was too, when a group of us and a few girls were present, he suddenly picked up the phone, and this scolded the street, as if he was awesome, who knew that when he was about to pretend to be round, the phone suddenly rang. A scene of pretending to be forced suddenly became the scene where he ran naked, and his face turned red all of a sudden, and we all thought he was making a fake call in front of the girl, pretending to be exposed, and blushing in embarrassment. Later, I learned that he was frightened at the time, and these are all later words, let me talk about it later.

We went to his house, and his grandmother was telling a fortune for a guest, and it wasn't the first time I had seen him.

His grandmother sat cross-legged on the kang, her head down and fiddling with her fingers, and then she yawned, and when she looked up again, she began to sing to the guest, and I heard it very well, his grandmother's lyrics. (Huang Guilan came to you and asked about something, please speak bluntly) The woman began to tell his grandmother about herself, it turned out that the woman was suspicious, her husband had another woman outside, and then Shang Kaifeng's grandmother sang again: This person is the life of a son, and he is destined to commit a peach blossom, depending on his sexuality and evil, he must have a good wife to solve the knot.

Hey, this song made you sing, isn't it a two-way block? The meaning is: that woman's husband is the fate of the son, of course there are some ** sluts around him to seduce him, if you want him not to be seduced, it depends on whether this woman who comes to tell the fortune is a good wife or a shrew, if she is a good wife and a good mother, her husband will not cheat, if she is a shrew at home, she is not filial to her in-laws, and she will be angry with her husband at every turn, her husband will be greedy, and the wild flowers outside will also be seduced by the outside world, in fact, Lao Shang's grandmother is still very kind, if you say to this woman that your husband has a woman outside, This woman will go home and her husband, quarrel, or even divorce, if you tell this woman that there is no woman outside her husband, it will not solve her suspicions, only in this way can she be persuaded to let the two husbands and wives know how to respect each other, and blindly lose their temper will lead to her husband's cheating. It all depends on how this wife behaves. Having said that, every man wants his wife to be a good wife and mother, if his wife is to himself every day, gentle, virtuous, and birdy, who would want to cheat, but it is not excluded that those animal personalities, eating in the bowl and looking at the cheating garbage in the pot.

I thought to myself: This old lady is really well-intentioned, and I don't know if he is really being topped or pretending to be topped.

I saw the woman, thanked his grandmother, and then put it in front of his grandmother, and turned away.

I looked back, Shang Kaifeng, he was standing on a stool, one hand stretched out to the roast chicken in front of his family Baojiaxian, just when he was about to touch the roast chicken, I only heard his grandmother, called, junior to your family my grandmother put down, Lao Shang was stunned, turned around and smiled, and then said to his grandmother: You haven't eaten yet! I thought you'd be done eating!

I'll it, what's going on, how did his grandmother tell her that she was his grandmother! Bad guys! And his grandmother didn't let him take it just now, why did she let him take it now? My head is full of question marks.

I saw his grandmother smiling at me, giving me the feeling that her smile was more erect than before.

At this time, his grandmother said to me: "The young man is not small! Disciple of the Moon Worship Gate, you dare to move

Grandma, you don't know me anymore, I'm Jia Jieyi! I replied a little inexplicably.

I thought to myself: This old lady I have been playing at his house since I was a child, why is he talking to me today, upside down, and what is the moon door

Wait? Moon worship door moon worship god wow I only feel that every tissue in the body is shrinking in an instant, and then it is brushed by cold sweat, and my head is dizzy, isn't this what happened last night! How could his grandmother know, it was difficult

I don't dare to think about it, I really don't dare to think about it anymore, it's not a hallucination, it's all true.

I wowed, Lao Shang, the uncompetitive guy, was startled by my shout, and then fell off the stool, and then got up and asked me: What's wrong?

I saw his grandmother, and said to me with a smile: Don't be afraid, young man, this is also your fate, let me answer your doubts! If you want to know what happens next, and listen to the next chapter.

(Thank you for your support, I'll get into the story right away)