Send the information about this thing to Mr. Lu, he called me, his voice trembled: "Tian, Boss Tian, what kind of goddess is so terrible, how can there be that, that kind of thing?" "I smiled and told him that this is the characteristic of Southeast Asian Buddhist cards, there are all kinds of raw materials, and the positive material is the one that was sold to you before, and the evil material is like this.

Teacher Lu asked, "If you buy this goddess of Iba home, will you be able to transfer it to me?" Don't be like last time, it doesn't work. "I laughed and said it was a bad card. Whoever worships it has an effect, but there is a difference between strong and weak effects. As long as you are sincere in your offerings, don't break the rules and taboos of offerings.

"Will the ghosts in the Buddha cards run out and harm people? I still have a wife and children at home, although this wife always scolds me. Teacher Lu said.

I replied, "Don't worry, you've watched too many horror movies, you can't see ghosts, they exist in another form of the world, don't worry." I've sold so many evil yin cards, if all the ghosts come out to harm people, then I won't be a professional killer. "When I said this, I thought to myself that the Buddhist cards sold over the years, even the little ghosts and lowered their heads, have directly and indirectly killed many people, what is the difference between this and the killer.

Probably thinking that what I said made sense, Mr. Lu dispelled the last trace of fear, and was ready to make a deal with me. Just as I was asking him to send me money as soon as possible, Mr. Lu suddenly asked, "Boss Tian, you have a lot of customers, do you have people from all walks of life?" ”

"That's right, there are all kinds of things, even stars from Hong Kong and Taiwan, what are you going to do?" I asked.

Mr. Lu smiled and said, "Do you have any customers from the publishing house, introduce me to a few." "I thought to myself, I want to recommend his book again. I've loved reading since I was a child, and I suddenly became interested in this book, and although I knew that he was just bragging, or that he was obscene, I still wanted to read it. So I said not yet, but you can send me the manuscript to see, and if I encounter this kind of customer in the future, I can consider recommending it for you. Teacher Lu was very happy and said that he would send it to my QQ mailbox immediately.

In the afternoon, I found another 6,000 yuan remitted on my computer, and hurriedly informed Fang Gang to help me deliver the goods to Shanghai. At the same time, I also found Mr. Lu's one in the mailbox. When I opened it and looked at it from the beginning, I didn't even vomit my lunch.

This is a bit of a fantasy story, telling the story from the opening of Pangu to the beginning of the earth until China became the hegemon of the earth. Good guys, all the celebrities in the world have made cameo appearances, and they are also mixed and matched, Joan of Arc fell in love with Cao Xueqin, Li Qingzhao married Hitler and had children. Not only is this not correct, but the writing is very naïve, I think when I was in the sixth grade of primary school, the summer essays I wrote seemed to be better than his, and I even wondered if it was ghostwritten by his son. I barely read more than 100,000 words, and I really didn't want to waste time, so I turned it off.

In the evening, Mr. Lu called me and asked me how I felt after reading, and I said that I had never seen such an awesome book. Mr. Lu was very proud: "The editors of dozens of publishing houses also say the same, it seems that I am really good." It's not that I'm bragging. I remember that the female editor of a major publishing house in Beijing called me and said that the president had read it, and that the publisher did not dare to publish it because it was too advanced and powerful, and suggested that I take it to the United Nations Press for publication. But I don't know anyone. I don't know where the UN is, so how can it go? Mr. Tian, do you know anyone from the United Nations? Help me introduce, send cigarettes and alcohol, please eat, I will reimburse. ”

I thought to myself that the female editor of that publishing house was really lacking in morality, and she actually used this kind of words to entertain Mr. Lu, knowing that he would take it seriously. Hurriedly said that he didn't know him, so as not to be glued by Teacher Lu.

A few days later, the amulet was sent to Mr. Lu's house, and he confirmed with me again how to make offerings. I said, "Say the mantra on that piece of paper three times at midnight." Be out loud and try not to mispronounce it. If you have a sense, you will have strange dreams or strange illnesses these days, but don't worry. It'll be fine in a few days. ”

As I expected, Mr. Lu called me a few days later and said that he had a low-grade fever for several days and felt groggy, but his body was not hot. I've seen this kind of thing too much, and I've seen it no longer weird, so I say it's normal, which means that the Buddha card has a sense with you. Teacher Lu asked, "The Buddhist card you are talking about, is it this goddess of Iba without clothes?" She's a female ghost, right, what if she sees me? It is said that if a man has a relationship with a female ghost. It's going to be unlucky, and besides, will I pass on some strange disease to my wife? ”

I laughed: "You think too much, not everyone can encounter ghost friendship, so you can worship honestly." ”

Teacher Lu asked: "Is it true that as long as I make offerings, the effect will come out, and I can become a famous writer and receive the Nobel Prize in Literature?" "I said not necessarily, and if you have that illusion, you might be disappointed. Teacher Lu didn't understand. I said, "Do you know how much the Nobel Prize for Literature is equivalent to RMB?" ”

"This ...... Quite a lot anyway. Teacher Lu replied.

I said, "A few million RMB!" If I spend 6,000 yuan, I want to become a great writer and win the Nobel Prize in Literature immediately, so why do I still sell Buddhist cards? Wear ten or eight by yourself, and sooner or later you will become the richest man in the world. Teacher Lu said anxiously how to see the effect. I said, it will definitely work, but it has to be realistic. For example, if you want to win the lottery, you must at least buy a lottery ticket, otherwise how will the money fall. Ghosts and gods help people, but also require people to cooperate with hard work, and the power of the yin spirit only makes you lucky, not suddenly falling from the sky.

Mr. Lu seemed to understand something: "Okay, you mean, I continue to submit articles everywhere?" That's effort. "I'm right, and don't stick to that one in the end, usually write more and submit more, the effect will definitely be there. Teacher Lu said energetically, I understand, you can see my effect. I thought to myself that your joke was pretty much the same, and you'd better never look for me again, anyway, I've made the money, and of course, I'm okay with you continuing to ask for cards.

Later, my cousin and sister-in-law came back from Malaysia, so I went back to Shenyang to stay for a few days. After that, Mr. Lu often texted me about how hard he worked, first wrote short stories to test the waters, and submitted them to major newspapers in Shanghai. I asked if it had been successful, and he said not yet. I told him to be patient, and there will be a process to success.

Of course, I didn't have any hope at all that this Teacher Lu would succeed. I even think that this kind of person can succeed. His books can also be published or published, and that is a strange thing in the Chinese literary world.

But as it turned out, I was fucking wrong.

That night, the lease of my Buddhist shop to a merchant had expired, and the shopkeeper was from Shandong. I wanted to go back to my hometown to get married, and after I quit the store, I found someone to clean it up, posted a rental notice and continued to ask for rent. Lying on the bed in the back room, I remembered the bits and pieces that happened here, in addition to Wang Jiao and Sun Xicai who had performed countless Zhou Gong gifts here, Bai Mei and I also had a good time on this bed.

Just when I was thinking about it, a text message rang on my mobile phone, and the sender's name was "Mr. Lu - the world's first writer". That's the name I gave him on purpose, just to satirize him. The text message reads: "Success. I've finally made it! ”

"What's wrong? Do you have a publisher that wants to publish, or has the Nobel Prize organizer just called you? I replied.

Mr. Lu replied: "No, but one of my short stories was published by a pure literary journal in Shanghai, and the manuscript fee was 50 yuan, and I didn't ask for a page fee!" "I was about to laugh, but I thought to myself that this was a zero breakthrough for Mr. Lu, and I couldn't laugh at him. I said I wanted to see what the name of this publication was. Mr. Lu asked me for the address and said that he would mail me a copy immediately. I happened to be in Shenyang, so I asked him to send it to Shenyang by EMS.

I received the publication in a few days, and to be honest, there are fewer and fewer readers of pure literature and poetry in China, and the main reason is that it is detached from reality, moaning without disease, not to mention those poems, which cannot be read and understood, and are becoming more and more niche literature. But there are still many excellent literary and poetry publications that sell well, such as Shanghai's "Harvest".

I won't mention the name of this publication, so as not to be ironic, but it can be seen from the typography that the circulation of this publication is estimated to be the smallest among niche literature. On the last page, I saw the poem published by Mr. Lu, although a few years have passed, I still remember it. The name of the poem is "Helpless", signed by Lu Zi, and the content is:

"Would love to poop,

Just go into the toilet,

Take off your pants,

Sit down

Stand up when you're done,

going out to work,

But I feel like I still want to. ”