"It is dark in the West Mountain, every household closes the door, the foot handle type runs to the inn, the bird returns to the mountain and the tiger returns to the mountain, the bird returns to the mountain and the forest has a habitat, the tiger returns to the mountain and the beast is safe, one step two, two steps three, three or three see that the nine numbers are not complete, it is said that there is still a door that is not closed, whip the drum and invite the gods, hey, hey~~~!!"

Knock knock knock, knock, this set of words in this year I don't know how many words I have sung, that is really open to the mouth, due to the growth of age, plus the relationship of smoking, my voice is becoming more and more mature, not as soft as before, becoming a little hoarse, Han Wanchun said that this is good, the more hoarse people believe.

Sure enough, after singing the first sentence, Nie Baozhong and the old man seemed to be a little flustered, and looked at me with two big eyes, I was not nervous at all, smiled slightly, and sang again: "Hey~~Hey, hey~~~!" The left hand picked up the Wenwang drum, the right hand picked up the whip, the drum is not an ordinary drum, the whip is not a nameless whip, the Wenwang drum, the bamboo whip, the adze, the word round, and then tied to the Nezha mind King Kong circle, and Qianlong's match Kaiyuan, hey, hey~~!! ”

To say that this set of fake words has been repeatedly revised by me and Han Wanchun, it is close to dramatization, bluffing people can bluff people, but they can't bluff ghosts, but they can bluff people, because we don't expect to attract ghosts, I glanced at Nie Baozhong with my afterglow, and I saw him looking at me, as if he was still a little nervous, and his second uncle looked solemn, probably thinking about what he should say when his 'old wife' came up.

So, I sang again: "The bird returns to the mountains, the forest and the tiger returns to the mountain, the thousand-year-old king returns to the beach, the drums tremble, the soldiers move the ghosts today, point to the city god you get, point to impermanence to listen to the words, put two hundred pressure on the hall money, money can make the ghosts grind, all the ghosts sent by the ghosts hey hey~~~~!! ”

After singing, I bowed to Nie Baozhong, he gestured and took out two hundred yuan, pressed it on the table, I smiled, and then sang again: "If you have money, you can do things well, help the soldiers to help you move, all the ghosts, please listen, hurry up to the front of the hall, if you don't go, it's not good, the helpers can only continue to move, the primary school students who moved don't read their books, the migrant workers who moved don't go to work well, the old men who moved sighed, the little widow who moved couldn't sleep in the middle of the night, and her tears rubbed against the edge of the kang, and she was smoking. Hey, hey!!! ”

This word is Han Wanchun, the old guy wants to add, he said that it is so powerful, it is smoking, I have nothing to say about it, so I have to continue singing: "The drum beats three times to invite the ghosts, the ghosts and immortals hurry up to listen to the words, what I invite is the big disciple of the ancestor of Yinshan, the eight hundred ghosts are almost impermanent men, hey, hey, hey!! ”

Knock knock knock, knock, sang for a while, Han Wanchun seemed to feel that the time had come, so he screamed, and stood up with my drum beat for a crazy disc, while Nie Baozhong and his second uncle were stunned, watching Han Wanchun twist his body and couldn't say a word.

I saw that the time was almost up, so I sang while beating the drum: "The drums are beating and knocking, please come to the ghost fairy to go down the mountain, which way the ghost fairy comes to the road, hurry up and give us the name, what do you need to catch the wind, what do you want, it's all ready-made, oops~~~!! ”

Han Wanchun twisted his body, the bell on his body rattled, with the drumbeat, forming a strange music, I saw him singing: "Shouting to help you hear and hear, please go down the mountain peak at our house, ask me for my name, it's not that I don't have a name, I am, Jizang sat down to practice Buddhism, talked and laughed in front of the Yama Palace, Yin Mountain 404 Caves, Yellow Wind Cave in the ascetic practice, the clouds came quickly, the tired back and legs also hurt, hurry up and hurry up, first come to the 'Ha Laqi' to face the wind, hey, hey, hey~~~!! ”

Hara Qi'er is Hongliang fine water, that is, liquor.

I smiled in my heart, thinking that the old bastard was indeed hungry, and I was embarrassed to care about this family, so I made up for it here, so I turned my head to the old man and said, "Hurry up, the old man of Yinshan is here, hurry up, hurry up!" ”

"What is he doing here?" The old man said to me a little inexplicably while worshipping, "Didn't you recruit my daughter-in-law to come up?" ”

Qian Zha paper on the side smiled, I rolled my eyes, and then pretended to be anxious and said to the old man: "Don't you know, the ghost in the underworld wants to recruit when he says it?" Even if it's a human world, don't you have to ask for a temporary residence permit to go to Yanjing? This Yinshan master specializes in ghosts, and wants to ask you for tribute, and if you give it to him, he will put up the ghost of your daughter-in-law, if you don't give it a bad night, maybe it will make trouble for you. ”

I did change, and I said it as if it were the real thing, and when the old man heard me say this, he said with some hesitation: "That...... Just give it to him, what does he want, just wine? ”

I said to him, I'll help you ask, and then turned back to Han Wanchun, who was twisting Yangge, and said, "Is Moutai okay?" ”

"Medium." Han Wanchun shouted in a sharp voice: "I want silver too!" ”

I smiled bitterly, this old bastard's ears are quite good, so I asked Nie Baozhong to take Maotai, poured three small cups, the old bastard drank this one by one, and the five hundred yuan was pressed on the hall, so he shouted: "Call the helper, you hear clearly, I took your money to drink your wine, this will help you do things, the soul of the Nie family has been brought, what is the matter with the matter, hurry up, the old fairy rests on the side, and when the rooster cries three times, the old fairy will take the soul back to the mountain, hey~ Hey, hey!! ”

Speaking of this, I saw that Han Wanchun 'smack', as if he was angry, and sat on the chair again, just when everyone didn't know what was going on, Han Wanchun suddenly said gloomily: "Dead old man, why are you asking me to come up so much~~?" ”

I have to say that this old bastard is indeed an acting school, this ventriloquist makes him play, as soon as he looks up, whether it is his expression or tone, he looks like an old lady with small feet.

I turned back to the second uncle in the Nie Bao and said, "Old man, hey? Old man, grandma is here, hurry up, say anything quickly. ”

"Is this my wife?" The old man said in surprise.

I nodded, and then said to him: "Of course, Master Yinshan specially brought it to you, hurry up, ask any questions." ”

"But...... My wife is from Tangshan, so the accent is wrong? The old man said to me.

Dizzy! Hearing him say this, he suddenly secretly said bad in his heart! I didn't expect that old lady to be a Tangshan ghost! What can I do? If one sentence can't be rounded, then it's miserable, and we liars can't be beaten out?

The situation was critical, but fortunately, Han Wanchun had an idea at that time, and I saw him shouting in a shrill voice: "Nige is terrible~ Zi (you bad old man), the Mandarin I learned below is not good?" What's the matter, am I dead and you're looking for a little wife again this time?! Believe it or not, I'm going to kill you?! ”

I clearly heard that the money on the side of the paper could not be held back, laughed, this is not to blame him, in fact, I also want to laugh, admiring this old bastard's wit at the same time, I can't help but sigh, it seems that this old guy's ventriloquist is really ruthless, and immediately Mandarin will change to Tangshan London accent, at first glance it sounds like Zhao Lirong teacher.

Seeing that this old guy's Mandarin changed to Tangshan dialect and then to Mandarin, plus Han Wanchun's preemptive words broke his flowery intestines, why didn't the old man believe it? I saw him sigh, and hurriedly stepped forward and said, "Daughter-in-law~~ I was wrong, no, I really didn't want to find it, it's just ...... That's it...... Oh, Ershen'er, Ershen'er, help me persuade me! ”

I held back a laugh, then regained my seriousness, turned to Han Wanchun and said, "I said...... Grandma, don't be angry first, drink a glass of wine to suppress the shock, okay? ”

"Hmph, that's what people say." Han Wanchun cocked the orchid and drank another glass of wine in a girly manner, and then I said to him: "What, you see that you have passed away for so long, the underworld is different from the yang world, the old man is so old, how can you pity the poor family, the old wife, the old wife, you have to have a companion when you are old, right?" ”

Han Wanchun pretended to think for a while, then sighed and said to me: "Young man~ Actually, your grandmother and I are not unreasonable people, who doesn't have a ...... That need, right? I also know, I just can't go along with this tone, this dead old man, if he has a new love, he must forget his old love, thinking that if he marries his daughter-in-law, then I will be lonely below~~!! ”

After that, the old guy actually wiped his tears, and the actor's anger was overflowing, this performance should be magnanimous and magnanimous, deep and deep, just like the aura of a crying man with small feet and small feet.

"No, no, no!" The old man hurriedly said, "How could I forget you, I will definitely burn something for you, and then I will spend the rest with you when I die, okay?" ”

"Really?" Han Wanchun said.

"Really, really!!" The old man said.

"You plague old ghost and still have a conscience............"

So, the two of them picked up the family routine, I watched in the middle, and suddenly felt that Han Wanchun was also a big man from a certain point of view, this old man was like money and paper, and he had been played with between applause.

But I also understand that I can't say more, and it is inevitable that there will be mistakes if I say too much, so after Han Wanchun put forward various conditions, I hurriedly beat the drum, which was like the bell at the end of the second half of the boxing match.

After singing a play, he slammed a drum at Han Wanchun, only to see Han Wanchun sit up with an 'ah', and then pretended to be extremely weak and said to me: "The old lady is invited?" Got it done? ”

I smiled, and then said to him: "It's done, it's done, the old lady agreed, uncle is tired, you can rest for a while." ”

After finishing speaking, I turned my head to Nie Baozhong, who had not yet returned to his senses, and arched his hand to the old man, and said, "Congratulations, congratulations, old man." ”

"This ...... That's it? The old man obviously didn't understand, so he asked me, I nodded, and then said to him, "It's over, the old lady should be on her way back by now, didn't she just say it, and she has agreed." ”

"Really?!" The old man said.

"Uh-huh!" After I said this, I thought to myself that Han Wanchun agreed anyway. So he whispered to the old man: "Old man, this time this job is really difficult, you see my uncle is sweating profusely, it took a lot of effort, that Yinshan old man is not a small foot, but it is finally worth the hard work, old man, you can rest assured now, right?!" ”

How did they know that the reason why Han Wanchun was sweating profusely was that he jumped out.

"Oops!" The old man seems to be old, and he reacted when he heard me say this, only to see him slap his thigh, he was so happy that his dentures almost popped out again, he said to me and Han Wanchun: "Great, this time I and ...... Haha, great, great, a few people are affected, hurry up, let's go to the small restaurant at the entrance of the village to drink something, and bring this bottle of Moutai! ”

Nie Baozhong nodded hurriedly, and then took us to eat a meal of game in the village, during the banquet, the two of them kept praising Han Wanchun, Nie Old Man said, thanks to you, I will finally have a peaceful sleep in the future, Han Wanchun looks like a master, very modest, but his heart is happy, this vote, counting the fraction, we earned about more than seven thousand, which is really a lot.

And the old man Nie is still very happy, speaking of which he seems to have found a suitable one, his good friend is also an old lady in this village, after Nie Baozhong knew, he said that it would be done by the way, the old man was happy, and he agreed after a while, and decided to marry the old lady on Sunday, and let us stay together to be lively.

Eating and drinking for nothing, Han Wanchun liked it the most, so he didn't shirk it, so he agreed, at night I burned the pair of boys and girls outside the courtyard with Qian Zha paper, the firelight reflected the dark night in the village, the wind rose, the distant woods whined, and a few crows cries were mixed in, at that time we couldn't think that the happy event after these two days was accompanied by a funeral one after another.

(The two watches are over, and I will continue tomorrow, thank you for your support, thank you~~~!! ）

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