I took a photo from under the glass, scanned it on my computer, did some repairs, printed it out, put it in my wallet, and still carry it with me.

This is my little dreamy yearning for the warmth of family affection.

I always felt that something particularly tragic or terrible must have happened that made Su Mosen look like the fierce and hard-hearted devil he is now.

Maybe I caused it, which is why he had a cold hatred for me, and tortured me so hard for many years.

But I don't remember anything like that, I can't remember anything about it.

Xiao Hai came back from the attic and saw me standing in front of the desk in a daze, and also walked over and lowered his face to look at the photo under the glass.

I pointed to myself in the photo and smiled at her, saying, "Look, I was very ugly when I was a child, and I really fulfilled the old saying, a woman has changed eighteen." ”

She looked at the picture and turned her face to look at me. Look at the photos again, look at me again. Suddenly asked, "When were these photos taken?" ”

I chuckled in my heart and wanted to slap myself twice, but I still had to make a very normal expression on my face and replied to her, "I took it when I was a child." ”

She scrutinized my face and then looked at the picture.

I prayed in my heart, but I don't see anything wrong, or I can't explain it.

Fortunately, she didn't see anything, straightened up and went back to clean up the closet.

I glanced over at the table and thought to myself, though these pictures were very old, they weren't to the point where they would make people suspicious.

I thought again, for the sake of peace of mind, let's put it away, lest she stare at it if she has something to do, and really see the problem.

While thinking, I hurriedly moved the glass and the fleece board of the substrate to the attic and put it into a large cabinet for old clothes and old things.

But sooner or later, she has to know this problem.

Because from a certain point of view, her father and I are the same kind of people.

Then I had to clean up the house with her, but she wouldn't let me go and told me to do my job. I had to help, saying, "I'm going to have nothing to do." ”

She said, "Don't you have to go to the Public Security Bureau?" ”

I twisted my face and smiled at her while cleaning up the things in the drawer: "I'm not a police officer who officially works, so why don't I report every day." ”

She lowered her head, continued to take out the clothes in the cupboard, folded them into the box, and whispered as if talking to herself: "I wanted to ask you yesterday, you are not a policeman, how can you go in and out of the public security bureau, and those policemen still respect you very much?" ”

I flattened my mouth and smiled, and said, "Because I'm smart." ”

She looked at me and said, "I'm serious." ”

I picked up the book and notebook in my hand, turned around, and said, "I answered the right answer." ”

As she spoke, she didn't pay attention to her feet, her knees hit the chair, and the things she was holding in her hand slid two books on the ground, and a few pieces of note paper slipped out of it, which landed right at Xiaohai's feet, she picked it up and looked at it a few times, and handed it back to me, I stuffed it back into the account book and clamped it, put it into the box, and half-squatted to explain to her about my relationship with those policemen and my role in the Public Security Bureau.

This time she believed it, with a thoughtful expression on her face, as if she was planning something.

Sure enough, within a few seconds, she spoke.

She said: "Can you ask the police to help me check, where is the north ditch?" ”

I nodded, "Okay, no problem." ”

She looked up at me and smiled. This time, it was a smile flowing from the heart, bright and warm, like the best sunflower of the season.

After several hours of scrambling, I finally cleaned up the room, and then wiped all the hardwood floors in the house, waxed them, and sat on the stairs like a dog.

I rolled my eyes at her and said, "Little sea girl, for the sake of me being so tired, say two nice words to praise me." ”

She came out of my room with dirty clothes to wash, and said, "If you don't do it, I won't complain, if you want to do it, I won't stop you, you have to be obedient, no." ”

I held my breath in my chest again, and I couldn't let it go for a long time.

Xiaohai's spirit of washing clothes is very touching, each piece is carefully touched, and the clothes that are very tender and fine to the touch are picked out and washed by hand, and jeans and coats are thrown into the washing machine to stir. I looked at it and felt moved, and then I began to indebted, especially wanting to be nice to her, and wanting to give her something. Looking around, there are indeed a lot of new clothes, pants, skirts, shoes and so on, but she can't wear them. So I dragged two bags to her, and I forgot to buy her a bag yesterday, and I guess she will have to carry the blue homespun bag when she goes out later.

I shoved the bag into her hand and said, "I haven't used it since I bought it, and I don't want it anymore, so I'll give it to you." ”

She took it, flipped it around in her hand and looked at it a few times.

I noticed that she was looking at the price on the label instead of the bag itself, and I felt bad about it and wanted to beat her up.

Sure enough, she snorted twice from her nose and said, "As far as you are a loser, it is not enough to build a mountain of gold and silver." ”

After speaking, without waiting for me to react, he went upstairs with one hand in one hand and said, "Give it to me and I'll laugh." ”

I looked at her fat but light body, and I was very confused, I had to have a smiling face to be called a smile, I didn't see her smile at me.

The whole day was very peaceful, eating lunch outside, shopping for an afternoon, and working up and down after I got home, I always had to help, she was not polite, let me help collect clothes and quilts, help put the washed dishes into the cupboard, help lock the windows and lock the door. These are all things she should do for me with my money, I helped her do a good part, she doesn't feel anything, up and down is still faint, no smile. I always wonder what kind of upbringing, how much suffering, can deprive a person of laughter in his nature.

It was already half past nine in the evening, and it was dark and quiet outside. We sat on our backs on the sofa in the living room staring at the ceiling in a daze, she didn't turn on the TV, probably tired enough to choke enough.

The two of us sat on the sofa at a distance of half a meter, with our hands spread and our faces up, blinking at the ceiling, at the chandelier, at the empty air.

For a long time, she opened her mouth and asked me what I did on a normal day.

I told her, "If you go to the Internet, read books, go shopping, or go to the public security bureau, you can basically do nothing." ”

She said, "Oh, you don't have to do anything serious, don't you have to grow hair?" ”

I said, "No, you see my body seems to be in a panic, but my mind is very busy, think about this and think about that." ”

She said, "Then tell me what you have been thinking about in your spare time today." ”

I told her to let me think about it.

I think about what I've been thinking about in my free time today.

Hehe, this question really stumped me a bit.

I really didn't think much about the things I usually thought about all day today, such as aliens, genes, unregulated reverse growth, abnormal longevity, unexplained diseases, etc., I didn't even think about them. Together with the three murders that happened in the past few days, I didn't think much about it.

It feels like the whole day, so quiet, a little bit of poetry, what a beautiful day, I was working in the garden, hummingbirds perched on top of honeysuckle flowers, there is nothing in this world I want to possess......

This is a poem, written by a foreigner. When I was in college in Hangzhou, a boy from the next class pursued me, standing at the bottom of the dormitory building and playing the guitar and reading it. The sun was shining that day, the breeze was warm, and he was wearing a black turtleneck cardigan and dark jeans, a particularly handsome and clean boy, but unfortunately, I didn't like him.

For so many years, I haven't loved anyone, I don't know if it's because I don't have the opportunity, or because I don't have the ability to love. Once I asked Bai Yafeng what it feels like to love someone, and he said that one day, the person you thought about before going to bed, he was still in your mind after waking up, and you just loved him. When I listened to it, I thought it was very weird, and I thought that a man like Bai Yafeng, who was rough and even obscene, could actually understand love.

I asked Xiaohai if he had ever been in a relationship.

She laughed coldly, so to speak, cruelly, without saying anything.

I didn't know whether I was alive or dead, and I asked her if she had any boys she liked.

She laughed coldly, cruelly.

I felt that this conversation could not go on, and I was about to change the topic, but she suddenly spoke, her voice was full of hatred, and she replied word by word: "Yes, dead." ”

I didn't dare to ask anymore, but I didn't take it too seriously. At this time, I thought that Xiaohai's so-called "dead" was just angry words, and it was about the boy who was a childhood sweetheart in the past, and later fell in love with someone else, so she said that she was dead in her heart. It wasn't until later that I realized that Xiao Hai spoke straightforwardly, never with metaphors or tricks, she said that if she was dead, she was really dead, dust returned to dust, and her soul went to the kingdom of the Heavenly Father.

Then they all fell silent, and for several minutes no one spoke, but they were not embarrassed, as if this was what we were used to.

I got up and went to the bathroom, made two cups of tea, and when I came back, Xiaohai was still sitting on his back on the sofa in the same posture as before, almost calming down.

I handed her the tea and asked her what she was thinking.

She said firmly: "I'm thinking about those dilapidated houses in the countryside, and if I don't go back, those relatives will definitely rob my house." ”

I asked, "Is your house worth a lot?" ”

She said, "It's worth a lot of money, it's deadly." ”

I couldn't figure it out: "Since it's worthless, why are your relatives still bothering about robbing?" ”

"They are looking for land, and if they have land, they can build a new house," she said. ”

I nodded confusedly, "Oh, it's complicated. Is there any way to keep them completely out of mind?

She said coldly: "Unless the world destroys everyone, everyone dies." ”

I thought about it for a while, and said: "No matter how worthless it is, there is a price, so you have to go back empty, ask for a price, I will buy the house for you, everyone will sign and draw, the money and goods will be cleared, and no one will hinder anyone's business in the future." ”

She suddenly stopped ringing.

It took a long time before she said with a serious face: "I'll just say you're a loser." ”