I used to hear that 'those who are close to Zhu are red, and those who are close to ink are black', and even more (the company's gossip sister) once told me: If you want to make yourself beautiful, the most money-saving way is to be with beautiful people more, people's appearance can be 'infected' after a long time, and after a long time, they will naturally become beautiful. In order to prove the scientificity of what she said, she also cited two examples: first, husband and wife, after two people get along for a long time, their facial features and feelings will be close. Second, pregnant women only look at the photos of beautiful babies after pregnancy, in fact, they hope to give birth to a cute baby through visual edification.

So after accepting her disguised brainwashing, I completely accepted her absurd beauty theory at first glance. And I can't wait to start with the beauties around me, and I want to practice it myself. However, my friends all belong to the standard of passers-by, although they are not sorry for the audience, but they are also the type that is easy to disappear and cannot be found in the crowd, which caused my beauty plan to be ruined. I was annoyed for a long time, and even self-examined, lamenting that I had too few friends.

But now if anyone is telling me about this beauty method, I will definitely smack him hard, reward him twice, and tell him righteously: Sister! Even if you die ugly, it's not uncommon to be in the company of beauties!

Since I was personally transferred to Mingzhiyuan to serve by Lord Shizi a few days ago, I have proved the ironclad truth with my own blood and tears: the gossip in the company is all about killing my father! Not to mention becoming beautiful, if it goes on like this, I guess I don't need to bring a knife when I go out to rob, just seeing that I don't look like a human or a ghost now, it's enough to make the person faint and search the body directly!

The beauty of the prince is definitely a fight with his horror level! If his beauty is shocking and captivating, then his horror level cannot be said to be earth-shattering, at least it is also crying ghosts and gods!

Case 1: The name of the prince is given

When I first arrived at Mingzhiyuan, the prince of the world officially gave me the name of Bajie on the grounds that I was the eighth close attendant by his side and that I had to guard against arrogance and rashness in dealing with people!

Hearing this resounding name, the corners of my eyes twitched. The master is wise, and on the first day, he made me rank in the immortal class, and he is still the most ugly pig immortal in ancient and modern times! Since then, this name has been widely used in the palace, when I am called into the eight precepts by mouth every day, it really makes me feel embarrassed: I am a young girl with the same name as the pig, and my heart is really dark! If I could, could I tell them that calling me Wukong is better than Bajie? Although the face is not human, but the figure is still slimmer?

Case 2: The son has a serious habit of cleanliness, and everything he can touch must be kept spotless.

Seeing a hair on the ground, Shizi spoke: "Bajie, clean up!" ”

I immediately diligently lay on the ground and picked up the hair and threw it away, but I didn't expect the prince to stare at me motionless with those cold and shining eyes, and I flattered and explained: "Master, the hair has been cleaned up." ”

"Sprinkle all the floors in the study with water and mop them up!" Shizi said expressionlessly.

What the!? Just a hair! Want me to clean all the floors? The study area here is 200 square meters, is it necessary!? I looked at him with my mouth wide open in disbelief: "Master, just one hair, are you sure you want to sweep all the ground once?" ”

"Hair meets wind...... It moves. Shizi's slender eyes were half-narrowed, and the light in his eyes escalated from cold to dangerous.

"The master is jealous and hateful, clean and self-conscious, respectable and admirable! Minions, let's do it! "Succumbing to his terrifying gaze, I swept and mopped the entire floor five times for a hair, under his perverted standards! Lying in bed at night, I really want to eat a whole bottle of calcium and high calcium tablets, so that my waist and legs will not hurt, and I will go up to the fifth floor in one go! 'Wishes.

Case 3: The prince likes to be quiet and taboos all noises.

One day, the prince of the world took a lunch break and suddenly spoke: "Bajie, it's too noisy!" ”

"Back to the master, there is no one else in the room, only a slave, and no one is making noise." As soon as he went to sleep, I went into petrification mode, and the atmosphere didn't dare to come out.

"Garden......" Shizi opened the bed curtain and looked at me with a wicked face.

"There's no one in the garden either, the minions are sure!" His old man's habits and preferences are well known to the people around him. As soon as he was ready to rest, everyone scattered outside the garden in the form of birds and beasts, for fear of accidentally disturbing the prince and setting himself on fire. Only I, the 'brave man', stayed behind to wait because of my status as a close attendant.

"It's not a human, it's a worm!"

"Worms?" As I listened, I noticed the faint chirping of cicadas outside. Could it be that once this person looks evil, he will even hear differently than ordinary people, and he can receive ultrasound!? If you don't subdivide such a sound, it's so weak that you can't feel it, okay!?

"Go clean up!"

I looked at the garden in despair with all my facial muscles twitching: not to mention that the area of the garden is comparable to that of a modern People's Park, just the lush vegetation in the garden is enough to make me crazy!

Seeing my sluggish reaction, the cold voice sounded again: "Give you half a pillar of incense time!" ”！

Looking at the flashing ghostly light in his eyes, I didn't even have the courage to confirm it, and I slapped my chest: "This bold insect dares to disturb the master's dream, and the slave is looking for it desperately!" I don't want to give you life or death, and the slave will never come back to see the master! He ran out of the room in a duel stance.

And this time, I miscalculated the strength and cunning of the enemy, fell from a tree, bruised my arm and sprained my foot, and almost did not become disabled!

Case 4: The standard of tea drinking by the prince is harsh.

The prince only drinks five points of hot tea, one more point is hot, one less point is cold, but if it is not satisfactory, it will be restarted. I have to run more than 30 times a day just to serve tea! And the whole palace is big to death, although Mingzhiyuan has an independent tea room, but it is still far away from the wing room and the study, a round trip to say less there is a 500 meters! I believe that if I can get lucky, I will definitely be able to have no food and clothing for the rest of my life, and at least it will not be a problem to win an Olympic long-distance running championship!

Case 5: The son of the world is diligent and gets up every day to exercise in the morning.

What do you say he is doing in the morning? Saying it scares you to death! He got up as an old man, and he didn't do anything but meditate! You said that it was his own business that he didn't go to sleep with a high bed and soft pillows, but why did he bother me, a person who was originally 'just fighting for one more second of sleep, and was often late', and had to arrive at the post at three o'clock in the morning every day to accompany him to stand in a daze? The most blood-vomiting thing is: he is a fairy wind bone, and he is refreshed like this every day. And I am getting more and more haggard day by day, and the dark circles under my eyes can make the panda sigh to himself, dwarfed!

I really can't list too many examples of these kinds, and I want to cry when I think about it. I now understand why there are seven predecessors in front of me, and if I die like this, I will probably have a ninth servant soon! Now as soon as I walk into Mingzhi Garden, I will feel the yin wind and panic, and when I see Shizi, I can't help but cramp in the corners of my eyes, my legs and feet are weak, and his voice has become my life-seeking Sanskrit sound, which makes me restless. What made me even more devastating was that even when I was sleeping, I could have auditory hallucinations, and I felt Shizi say to me in a cold voice: "Bajie, clean up the ......"

Although these experiences made me tired and miserable every day, they were much easier than accompanying my son to the school at Hakufuin, because Bofuin is a place that truly embodies the true meaning of the saying that life is more hell than hell. For me, it's definitely a realistic nightmare, a purgatory of reality!

Bofu Yuan is one of the six courtyards, and it is a family school located in the palace to teach the children of King Jin's family. Now, in addition to the prince, there are other related relatives and children of the palace, a total of 12 people are admitted to the hospital to study. In addition to the normal coursework, he will also teach subjects such as piano, chess, calligraphy and painting, as well as the art of war and martial arts. And the master hired is either a Hongru or a top master, and the standard is naturally impeccable.

Originally, as a close attendant of the prince, I was very happy to have the opportunity to enter the Bofu Temple. Why wouldn't I be happy because I could get a free learning opportunity? But after only one visit, my mind changed, and I paid a terrible price for my original simple thoughts!

The first time I accompanied Shizi to Bofu Yuan, I was just in time for the master to check his homework. When asked about the son of the world, the great master of my family gave full play to his iceberg nature and was silent. After the Master's good-natured guidance and questioning several times to no avail, the Master was finally completely enraged.

took out an iron ring ruler more than a foot long, and the master shouted in a loud voice: "If you don't want to forge ahead, why is it a heavy responsibility?" ”

There was a burst of ecstasy in my heart: what a brave master, not afraid of the powerful, and really a great man! I'm sticking with you! Hit hard! You must give this cold-blooded imp a taste of power, and let him know that Shandandan is blooming red and gorgeous!

When I couldn't hold back my excitement and trembled slightly, the Master came to us with a square pace. This momentum, this body shape, can't resist this aura if you don't even open the killing ring!

"Reach out!" The master raised the ring ruler in his hand and said loudly.

With the excitement of watching a good show, I stared at Shizi sitting at the desk in front of me, he still looked calm and relaxed, and he looked indifferent. Hmph, what's the spirit? Wait until you get the board, and then see if you can keep this stinky fart!

"Reach out!" The Master raised his decibel level, but the Son of the World still sat and did not respond.

"I'll let you reach out!" Master's face suddenly enlarged in front of my eyes, stretch out his hand? Why is he yelling at me? It's not that I'm wrong. I blinked at my master in confusion, only to see that his face was flushed and glaring at me angrily, and even his eyes were about to come out.

"Bajie, reach out!" Shizi's half-drooping eyelashes, and his voice sounded without any emotion.

I? Why me? I'm innocent! Although it was unbelievable, I was still forced to stretch out my little palm tremblingly. As a result, when the ruler fell, I did not hesitate to praise the Master, and sure enough, I did not disappoint, and I did not hesitate to let out the best treble comparable to that of Pavarotti!

I later learned that the reason why every master would bring a servant to school was that although the children of the nobility were taught here, they were children after all, so it was inevitable that there would be mischievous, naughty, and not serious about studying. It is supposed that they should be punished, but because of their status and status, the master is not able to punish them directly, but they still need to criticize and educate, so they will kill chickens to show monkeys, and reprimand and punish the attendants or scholars who accompany him, so as to serve the purpose of vigilance. Unfortunately, I am the one who plays the role of this unjustly killed 'chicken'.

What really made me angry and hurt was not my innocently beaten and swollen hand or my miserable life as a scapegoat, but the night of the incident.

On the night of the beating, I waited for the prince to learn calligraphy in the study. When serving tea, he accidentally found that the book written by the prince was the answer to the question raised by the master during the day, and he was unique and thoughtful. I didn't understand and asked, "Master, don't you know the Master's problem?" Why not? ”

"I don't want to talk." The prince continued to practice calligraphy without raising his head.

"But if you don't answer, the master will be angry and want to hit someone!" I exclaimed.

"I know," he gracefully picked up the teacup and took a sip: "It doesn't hurt!" ”

The corners of my mouth twitched, and I couldn't answer. It doesn't hurt! It's not you who hit! It's me! Of course you don't feel pain! But what about me? Am I the reincarnation of the invincible Iron and Gold? Eldest brother! I haven't practiced the Vajra Cover Iron Cloth Shirt, I'm just a mortal, I'm dying of pain! Ten fingers connected to the heart, do you understand!

And today is the day of the world's son going to homeschool, and I am already so frightened that my whole body is about to convulse! If this continues, I will be stimulated every day by not eye cramps, crooked mouths or facial muscle spasms, and I am really afraid that in the long run, I will end up with facial paralysis sooner or later, and the chance of stroke may be much higher.

Although there are a thousand or ten thousand in my heart, I don't want to accompany me to Bofu Academy. But what can I say? The master is heaven, do I have a position to refute it? Moreover, this master is still a very difficult master to mess with, and if he is displeased, it will not be as simple as suffering flesh and blood. People have to bow their heads under the eaves! Go and go, I can only pray that Lord Shizi is in a good mood today and is willing to cooperate with the Master, otherwise my little hands will ...... Alas!

I have to say that being a man should really have some backbone, and you can't simply succumb to obscenity! If I had come to my senses earlier, I wouldn't have made another wrong choice that would have derailed my life and drifted away from the happy life I had planned......