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There are three things a man should not do to his close girlfriend: First, don't compare her to a beautiful woman. Second, don't tell her that you have private money. Third, don't wait for a woman to change her clothes. A man who does the above three things wrong, you will be accompanied by troubles for the rest of your life, regret for a lifetime, and the hair planted on your head will fall out very little, your forehead will be radiant, and you will be a faceless person behind your back.

Tao Xiaozhi did the third thing wrong, he shouldn't be a woman to change clothes, especially a girl like Silly Xingxing who is in a crush period (Tao Xiaozhi was still spinning in her head just now) and is very confident in her appearance (otherwise, she wouldn't always talk about "beautiful cousin" and "cute cousin"). People who are in a crush tend to be very invested in love: the man invests money and jewelry, while the woman bets all her money on her looks. The investment in appearance is, of course, an investment in cosmetics, so if a girl does not have dozens or hundreds of cosmetics, then it can be concluded that she must be Zhu Bajie's sister or Diao Chan's sister, the former is useless if she wears makeup, and the latter is not necessary. So, Silly Star is worried about a lot of cosmetics on the table, and of course, there are a lot of colorful clothes waiting for her to choose.

Therefore, the unfortunate Tao Xiaozhi waited outside the bathroom window for an hour, and still had to continue to wait. Waiting for a woman to change her clothes is like waiting for the boss to pay her salary, from the beginning of the year to the end of the year, and finally deducting your bonus and overtime pay on the grounds of poor work; waiting for a woman to change her clothes, just like waiting for the teacher to announce the end of class, from sighing to drowsiness, and finally on the grounds that she deserted from class and did not listen carefully to the class, she will keep you in class and punish you for thinking about memorizing poems and memorizing texts; waiting for a woman to change her clothes is like waiting for a patient with diarrhea to come out of the toilet, from the smell is so strong that there are no flies at all, and finally I can't help it, and my pants are full of feces。 After playing these three metaphors, everyone must have experienced Tao Xiaozhi's mood, and must have thought that Tao Xiaozhi was anxious to find a short-term view, but in fact, it was not. Tao Xiaozhi is Tao Xiaozhi after all, all the stones blocking the road, when they reach his feet, they will always roll away inexplicably, all the fog, in his eyes, will always spread inexplicably, and all the dead knots will be inexplicably dissolved in his hands, because one by one he is Tao Xiaozhi, Tao Xiaozhi, who is omnipotent and can do nothing. At this moment, he was asleep and snoring.

The moon went from one side to the other, hid in the clouds and slept, and the stars stopped blinking affectionately, and covered themselves with the quilt and fell asleep.

Silly Xingxing finally couldn't hold back Tao Xiaozhi's snoring, pushed open the window and said angrily: "Tao Xiaozhi, can you be quiet?! You disturbed my makeup! And what should I do if my father and cousin find out that we are about to escape!"

Tao Xiaozhi was sleepy-eyed, wiped the saliva from the corner of his mouth and said, "Why are you so loud?!What if your father and your cousin hear it?"

Silly Xingxing blushed, put a finger in his mouth and said, "That's right, you're still smarter!"

"Have you changed your clothes?" Tao Xiaozhi yawned, "Can we go?" Suddenly, I felt a lot older, have I been waiting for a long time... ”

"Did you notice anything different about me?" said Silly Star, blinking with big green eyes.

"It's no different. Tao Xiaozhi rubbed his nose that was a little stuffy and said, "It's as stupid as before!"

"I'm wearing a purple dress!" Silly Star danced and spun around, "Isn't it beautiful?"

Tao Xiaozhi looked at the stupid star stupidly, and suddenly felt that she was more like a person (except for blue skin and an incorrigible stupid head), purple clothes... Qin Churu?!She also likes to wear purple clothes!

Tao Xiaozhi shook his head and said with a wicked smile: "It's still good-looking without clothes!"

Silly Star stomped his feet and said, "I'm going to kill you! ”

Silly Xingxing jumped over and grabbed Tao Xiaozhi, Tao Xiaozhi dodged left and right, and stuck out his tongue and said: "Come on, come and chase me!

Tao Xiaozhi ran, Silly Star chased, they were already far away from home, and came to a forest. At this time, the sky began to turn white, the air became a little colder, and it seemed that it was almost dawn.

Tao Xiaozhi said: "Do you really recognize the way to the old man who forgets his feelings?"

"Yes!" said Silly Star, "I've been to his house a few times." ”

"Is his house far from here?"

"If we walk," Silly Star counted, "it would take five or six days." ”

"What?!Five or six days!" Tao Xiaozhi said, "Why didn't you say earlier? We should go on horseback, or we won't be tired before we get there!"

"Why didn't you ask earlier?" grunted Silly Star, "and we don't seem to have taken anything: we didn't have any coils or dry food, and we forgot to bring the little melons!

Tao Xiaozhi sighed, sat on the ground with a depressed face, and said: "It seems that my Tao Xiaozhi's head is a worm! I just care about finding the old man who forgets my feelings, and I forget everything, I'm really stupid!"

"You're not stupid, you're not stupid!" Silly Xingxing comforted Tao Xiaozhi, "At least you're a little smarter than me, although it's a little bit, you can still sing!"

Tao Xiaozhi was so angry that he held his head in his hands and kept hitting the ground.

"You two are stupid!" said a man who came out of the shadows of the woods, brushing his braided beard, "it's hopeless, even I can't cure it!"

Tao Xiaozhi exclaimed: "Old man with pigtails!"

Silly Star smirked, "Dad, why are you here?"

The old man with pigtails was so angry that his nose curled up and he said, "Why are you here?

Tao Xiaozhi smiled: "Don't get me wrong, we are basking in the moon." ”

"Basking in the moon?!" The old man with pigtails pulled Tao Xiaozhi behind a tree trunk and whispered, "Did you trick the little fool star into coming out and wanting to fight in the field?"

Tao Xiaozhi shook his head vigorously and waved his hands, his legs made waves, and hurriedly said: "No, absolutely not! I am a yellow race! There is reproductive isolation between us, and it is impossible to mate... No... There's no way to do that!"

"No, we are all human beings, we should be able to mate!" said the old man with pigtails, "Don't hide it from me, in fact, I used to do this kind of thing when I was young!"

"Fighting in the field?!" Tao Xiaozhi exclaimed, he discovered another shocking secret.

"Yes, when I was young, I was a handsome and handsome man who was very popular with girls. At that time, as soon as I walked out the door, a large group of beautiful women knelt at my feet and begged to kiss my toes... The old man with the braided hair talked about his beautiful history, and his huge nose stood up, and the brush-like nose hairs inside were almost curled up to his eyebrows.

Tao Xiaozhi looked at his nose and sighed: "I don't look like it... ”

The old man with pigtails put his arm on Tao Xiaozhi's shoulder, his brush-like nose hair pierced Tao Xiaozhi's face, and said mysteriously: "Do you like silly stars very much?"

Tao Xiaozhi was itched by the nose hair of the old man with braids, and he didn't listen to him, and said, "Itchy, itchy... ”

"I know you're itching in your heart!" the old man with pigtails pressed Tao Xiaozhi's face tighter and said, "I'm going to marry her to you, how about it?"

"Itchy, itchy。。。。。。。 Tao Xiaozhi was so itchy that tears rushed out, and he kept laughing, "Don't get so close to me!"

The old man with pigtails was not in good ears, and he heard Tao Xiaozhi's words as "yes, yes... ”

"Do you want it, do you want it?" the old man with pigtails simply put his face on Tao Xiaozhi's face and said, "Do you really want her?"

"Itchy, itchy。。。。。。 Tao Xiaozhi was itchy with tears and snot.

"Great!" The old man with pigtails patted Tao Xiaozhi's shoulder excitedly and said, "Great! I've always been worried that she won't find a good son-in-law... ”

"What are you talking about?" stuck out the stupid star from behind the trunk, "what kind of field battles... What the hell is it?"

"Fighting in the field is ... ”

"It's to hunt wild ducks in the wilderness!" Tao Xiaozhi added with a smile, "When you see one, shoot one with a bow and arrow, and shoot it all over the sky!"

The old man with pigtails twisted Tao Xiaozhi's ass hard, and whispered: "Don't say it so explicitly, teach her badly!"

Tao Xiaozhi said with a smile: "Anyway, with her intelligence level, she won't understand what it means." ”

Silly Xingxing clapped his hands excitedly and said, "Sounds very funny! Brother Xiaozhi, let's go to the field battle when we have time!"

The old man with pigtails knocked on Tao Xiaozhi's head and said, "It's all your fault!"

Tao Xiaozhi changed the topic and said: "Great doctor, why are you alone in this wood, do you really want to ask an old woman to fight in the field?"

"Fart!" said the old man angrily, as if his nose hair was burning again, "It's all your fault!

"Our fault?"

"Why don't you tell me that you're going to run to find the old man who forgets his feelings?" said the old man with pigtails angrily, "you don't take my words to heart!"

"How do you know?!" Tao Xiaozhi exclaimed.

"How do I know?!" the old man with pigtails sneered, "What are you thinking in your hearts, can you hide it from me?!"

Tao Xiaozhi exclaimed: "You are really like a god! Not only did you expect us to go to the old man in the middle of the night, but also expected us to take which route! It's amazing!"

"Hehe, it's not a big deal!" the old man with pigtails looked up and laughed, "Who told you to make such a noise in the bathroom that even the deaf can hear it!"

Silly Xingxing scolded Tao Xiaozhi: "It's all your fault!

Tao Xiaozhi ignored Silly Xingxing (who told her that it was a waste of effort, because she couldn't even figure out who was making the loudest noise in the bathroom), and said to the old man with pigtails: "Since our actions have been exposed, what are you doing here? Do you want to stop us?"

"No!" said the old man with pigtails, "I'm here to see you off." I am indeed angry that you have said goodbye, but I think that since you are determined to go to the old man who forgets you, how can I, an old man, be embarrassed to stop you? However, I thought: maybe the structure of the yellow man's head may be different from ours, maybe it's because it's too simple... ”

"How is that possible!" Tao Xiaozhi clenched his fists and said angrily, "I don't carry that thing because I am a human being, a free person! What kind of Demon Domain Code, let the hell fuck it! I swear: One day, I will overturn the Demon Domain! I will liberate the oppressed people here and liberate the entire Demon Realm !!"

Liberate the oppressed people here and liberate the entire Demon Realm!!

Liberate the entire Demon Realm!!

Demon !!

Tao Xiaozhi's oath echoed in the woods, sweeping the entire forest like a violent wind, the shadows of the trees swaying in the wind, and the "salsa" sounded incessantly.

The old man with pigtails and the stupid star were completely shocked by Tao Xiaozhi's angry words, and they stood there like wood, motionless, the boss with his mouth open.

At this time, Tao Xiaozhi clenched his fists, looked at the distant starry sky with resolute eyes, and the wind blew his hair, like a statue of a great man, domineering, and stood there motionless.

The old man's lips trembled, his legs barely trembled, and he said, "Are you 。。。。。。。 Really?!"

Tao Xiaozhi scratched his head and said with a smirk: "It's just a joke, don't take it seriously!"

The old man with pigtails said angrily: "Are you kidding?!I thought you really had the appearance of a bully。。。。。。。 ”

The old man with pigtails jumped over and knocked on Tao Xiaozhi's head, Tao Xiaozhi smiled evilly, dodged left and right, jumped everywhere, and the old man with pigtails chased after him.

"Don't you run。。。。。。。 See how I fix your head!"

Silly Star laughed so hard that his stomach hurt and tears flowed out.

Silly Star smiled: "Don't make any more trouble, it's almost dawn, it's time for us to go!"

Tao Xiaozhi hid behind a big tree and said, "Yes, it's time to find the old man who forgets his feelings!"

The old man with the braided hair was out of breath, holding on to the trunk and shaking his head constantly.

Suddenly, an angry roar came from the depths of the woods: "Yellow race, if you dare to escape, I will have to break your body into pieces, just like chopping tofu!"