"You mean the idea doesn't work?" I looked at the fat man very calmly.

"Nonsense! Of course not! If you want to be smeared and drowned by the audience! ”

"Hmm." I thought very deeply for a moment, and then calmly said, "Then let's write history!" ”

"History? Does anyone read historical themes? ”

"Absolutely!" I looked at the fat man very easily, "You haven't seen what has been popular in the past few years, what kind of personality, the emperor's micro-service, private interviews, or something, just add a little joke about historical figures." ”

The fat man asked me who I was going to write about, and I smiled very implicitly and said, "Li Bai, a swordsman poet." ”

The fat man didn't speak, he grabbed an old newspaper and went to the bathroom, and I sat down in front of the computer again and began to describe history.

I immediately began to write, Li Bai's horse is called Zhao Xianglu, and his daughter is called Ziyan, so I left a famous sentence through the ages: Zhao Xianglu produces purple smoke.

Li Bai himself is a killer. At that time, swordsmanship was admired in the world, and the most powerful sword book was called "Taixuan Jing". In order to compete for this book, Li Bai, like other people in the rivers and lakes, participated in the world's first martial arts competition held in Shushan every four years.

The fat man crawled out of the toilet, saw this text, was stunned for a moment, and then yelled: "What is this!" ”

"It's history." I glanced at him and said very calmly, "You put on your pants first, and let me tell you slowly." ”

"Li Bai is actually Russian, but he is named because of his skin color. After he was born, his father said to the child's mother depressedly, I wondered, they are also two yellow people, why did they make a little white?

The kid confesses, the truth is how and how.

The child's father sighed and said that the child was innocent, so let's call him Xiaobai, whose full name is Robert Baibai Driver.

Xiaobai's growth process is omitted. Anyway, people and cats and dogs are similar, thieves are cute when they were young, and they show their surnames when they grow up. ”

Because I'm talking about history, of course, I have to talk about Xiaobai's differences.

"When Li Bai was twenty-five years old, he met Zhao Xianglu. Well, when I was talking about this, I was a little confused, why does history always have deviations? The sins of those who narrate history cannot be punished. When they write about some indecent things, they consciously play a spring and autumn penmanship, which has a good intention, but it forcibly annihilates history.

The fact is that Zhao was originally a popular brand in Chang'an Dark Xiangyuan. The reason why she is popular is of course because she is beautiful, but there is also an important condition that she sells herself and does not sell her art, as long as she has money to incense, everyone can plug it, so her stage name is incense burner.

The asking price of the incense burner is very high, and Li Bai can't afford to pay the wind fee, but he has another way, which is to pick flowers. ”

When I said this, I seemed to see Li Bai sitting next to me and calmly said to me, yes, that's right, history is like this.

`

Li Bai's family first talked about this, and then there were poems about him.

Regarding the origin of poetry, do you want to trace it back to "Wind", "Ya" and "Song"? I don't think it's enough. Roughly looking at the information, it is more accurate to say that Mr. Wang Shuo and Mr. Feng Xiaogang's research is more accurate: since the emergence of the exploiting class, the imperial literati also came into being, and later produced a complete literary and artistic system.

If you want to talk about this literature and art, our country is really enviable, at that time, there were idle classes who couldn't speak well, and they paid attention to the mediocrity, if you can't understand, imagine the so-called aristocratic grammar in the French system, and you probably understand.

Yes, that's what you know, the *game that has been passed down for thousands of years and hasn't been lost—poetry.

`

"The woman who has the greatest influence on Li Bai's life should be Aunt Gongsun.

Although there is a sign hanging at the door of Gongsun's house saying that literati and dogs are not allowed to enter, in fact, Gongsun's aunt still accepted Du Zimei as an apprentice, and Xiaobai only met Gongsun Lin through Xiao Du's recommendation.

To say that Chang'an at that time, in addition to the Li emperor's family, the most powerful was Gongsun. The eldest lady and grandson are below, the second brother is grandson Bing, the third brother is grandson Dou, and then the next ones are the ones, all, array, column, in, front. Known as the nine heroes of the Chang'an Gongsun Group"

At this time, the fat man was a little uneasy to hear, and his eyes fell helplessly on the poster on the wall behind me. I wiped the foam from the corner of my mouth and looked back, and the poster was Yagami-an, with the shadowy Konitz, Chris, Shelomi, and the Seven Flail Society in the background.

To tell the truth, I panicked for a moment, and then thought of the sentence "death has no proof", calmed down again, and continued to return history to its original face.

Originally, Li Bai was chasing Tang Wan, but unfortunately Xiao Tang liked Xiao Du, she said to Xiao Bai very clearly, Xiao Du is deeper, and you are too frivolous. Xiaobai defended that I was a Pisces and was a bit romantic, but my ML skills were great.

Xiao Tang slapped Li Bai with her famous red crisp hand. Said indignantly, men are all animals who think in the lower half of shen, except for Xiao Du. Xiao Bai covered his face and said in surprise, doesn't Xiao Du usually use the lower half of Shen? Could it be that Xiao Du is all using his hands?"

I looked at the fat man's eyes, which were about to collapse, and hurriedly said, "Stop, stop, when it comes to details, history looks like popular fiction." ”

In the end, Xiaobai climbed Mount Shu and waited for the world's first Huashan sword.

"Wait!" The fat man said, "Didn't you say that you are in Shushan, how can you discuss the sword in Huashan?" ”

I took a sip of tea and stared at him with sharp eyes until he shrunk into a ball, and then continued, "Slip of the tongue, slip of the tongue, it's Shushan on the sword." ”

"That competition, the real situation was very tragic. Thousands of people died, and the blood not only stained the flowers and plants on the mountain red, but even the noonday sun shone a suffocating dark red, and the air was filled with a fishy sweet smell.

Li Bai got up from the pile of dead people and looked at the swordsman opposite him with a breath.

That man had been his best friend.

And now too.

His name is Wang Lun. That is, the Wang Lun who is 'not as good as Wang Lun to give me love'.

The fourteenth generation of the young owner of Peach Blossom Villa, an unborn fencing genius.

When he was five years old, he had already killed someone.

debuted with his uncle at the age of sixteen, with a slight name;

At the age of eighteen, he sniped Jinshan seven guns alone;

In an instant, he went out of the north of the Saibei, and the sky-destroying fire knife Gao Cheng looked at the door;

The twenty-one-year-old assassin Hu country's famous general He Mi was in the army.

Now he is twenty-three years old, and he has already made a name for himself.

He was young and strong, and a long red silk scarf was tied diagonally around his neck,

The wind blew, and the pounds fluttered, but his people fell.

He had shed the last drop of blood.

But he has come, lived, loved, and that is enough.

Xiaobai has no tears, heroes have no tears, only blood"

"Slow down slow !!" The fat man grabbed his hair and said, "Wang Lun, he's dead?" ”

"Dead." I say.

"Holy! You describe him like that, how can he die after two minutes of playing? ”

"If he doesn't die, who will die? I asked, you can't let Li Bai die, he's the protagonist. ”

"Why die?"

Why die? I'm also confused, love and life, aren't they eternal themes?

"So why did he play like that? It's too ancient dragon style, and I was depressed to death when I heard it. Said a friend.

"Because I'm familiar with the style of the ancient dragon." I replied simply and continued, "Later, on the top of the entire Shu Mountain, there was only one living person left, Li Bai, he threw away his long sword, staggered to meet the sunset, walked to the edge of the cliff, opened his arms and shouted, oh, i'mkingoftheworld!

I glanced at the fat man's murderous gaze, and quickly changed my words: "Oh...... Belch...... That's what he said, the world is so big, it's not the king's land! This sentence is closer to historical facts, but unfortunately it is not quite in line with Li Bai's surname and temperament. ”

"And then?" The fat man is completely dizzy.

Later, Li Bai found out that he had made a mistake, he killed so hard that even the organizer was not spared, so that the peerless sword book could not be obtained, although it was only in this mountain, but there were many corpses and I don't know who, it was a pity.

Li Bai wandered on the mountain for a month, seeing that the corpses were rotten, and a few who were not rotten were also infected with the Ambrera virus and turned into zombies, walking crookedly on the full moon night, speechless to each other, Xiaobai was shocked to see it, so he had to go down the mountain. ”

"And later?"

"Later, as you know, Li Bai walked the rivers and lakes, drank and wrote poems, and in his spare time, he was a petty official who killed and killed, danced or something."

"And later?" Damn, this dead fat man is still asking!

"Later, in fact, there is a living person on the mountain, he is a court official who is responsible for recording the events in the rivers and lakes, because he pretended to be a zombie to avoid Li Bai's poisonous hands, he found the "Taixuan Sutra", and published it with a little editing and annotation, the book is called "Jiuyin Zhenjing". The author's signature is Huang Shang, how is it? Do you still have to ask later? Later, I will say that Guo Xiao Tianqiu is in the south of the Yangtze River, and the seven monsters of the Jiangnan Song Bingjia and Jin Bing B, do you want to listen to it!! I replied viciously.

"Don't be angry," the fat man swallowed and said with difficulty, "Every time I listen to your story, in the end you are in a hurry, what are you anxious about, you waste my time in the afternoon, I am not in a hurry." ”

"I'm not in a hurry, I'm just sad." I took out my cigarette and said to the fat man very sincerely: "History is actually a bitch, anyone can do it." ”

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