One

The monkey monkey grandson of Huaguo Mountain asked in surprise: Great Sage, how did you escape from the palm of the Buddha's hand?

Wukong replied: I put a second-hand gold ring on each of the Buddha's fingers, and each ring is set with a 300-carat diamond.

Two

The mouse struck the cat's skull with the barrel of his pistol and said, "I can't get along with me, and I don't have your good fruit to eat." I want you to know me, I am the pet of the Buddha, the immortal rat offered by the Great Leiyin Temple.

Three

Sun Dasheng was stuffed in the Laojun furnace, burned by the true fire of Samadhi for seven seven and forty-nine days, and jumped out without burning a single hair, the reason is: there is no private room with air conditioning in the furnace, and the lady brings cold beer and ice cream from time to time. 、

The reason why the Great Sage received such preferential treatment was that he approved Laojun to contract Huaguo Mountain.

Four

Sun Wukong was scorched with monkey hair in the Flame Mountain, and carried a fake banana fan to settle accounts with the Bull Demon King.

The Bull Demon King smiled and said: The fan can still extinguish the fire! It's common sense. Brother, your fiery eyes can change seventy-two times, but you still owe a little, and you are confused by the media hype.

Five

Tang Seng took the scriptures and returned to Chang'an, and Tang Taizong asked him: How many Buddhist scriptures have you retrieved?

Tang Seng replied: Five hundred and sixty-seven parts.

Taizong Dao: Good! Wonderful! With these scriptures, the country and the people can be safe.

Tang Seng said: It's not enough, there is one more important scripture in all the scriptures, I keep it in mind.

Taizong asked in surprise: What scripture?

Tang Seng replied mysteriously: Tight mantra. Come over with your ears......

Six

A martial arts academy recruited super martial arts instructors, and Sun Wukong and Zhu Bajie applied. The examiner asked about the origin of Bajie, and Bajie said: I used to be the generalissimo of Tianpeng before the Jade Emperor, and the personal bodyguard of Miss Universe Chang'e. Ask Wukong, Wukong said: I jumped out of the crack in the stone.

As a result, Sun Wukong was defeated.

Seven

The publisher said to Tang Seng: If you return to Chang'an from the Western Regions, you will be locked up in this Ci'en Temple to eat and translate Buddhist scriptures, how much can you earn for manuscripts? It's better to write a memoir, you are the scoop, the plot is made up by you, and the title of the book is "A Monk and a Naked Girl in a Hole". I have covered your book, pay the start-up fee of 10,000 taels of silver first, and then pay the manuscript fee of 1 million taels after the book is completed.

Eight

The reviewer said to Wu Chengen: You wrote that Guanyin Dashi used a water purification bottle and willow branches to revive the sacred tree that can bear ginseng fruit, which damaged the image and exaggerated the dark side, so it should be deleted.

Lord Wu Chengen: However, if you don't steal or pull out, where will you be saved?

They looked at each other dumbfounded.

Nine

Ask the six-eared macaque: You have such great skills, why do you want to pretend to be the Monkey King?

The monkey smiled: If you don't hype it up, you can't get the reception of the Buddha, and you can't invite Mr. Wu Chengen's favor to write it into his masterpiece. If it's not so hyped, how would you know that there is a little monkey spirit who once pretended to be Monkey King?