Nerd:

I have read your letter, and Sha Seng once wrote to me that your temper has not changed at all. Actually, I see you've changed a lot - your mouth is getting stinky :)

Who made me your senior brother, I will have a good talk with you today. First, you have suffered in the Nether, and I heard that you are no longer as thin as a pig. Everything is split in two. Actually, it's okay, someone told me before, you have a big belly like a pregnant woman, and it must be ** inside. It's been a long time since no one said that. You see, that's not a good thing? Besides, I once gave you advice to reincarnate and make a human appearance, but you just didn't listen. Think about it, although there are many strange shapes of immortals, but a pig arches back and forth in Tianshu, what is it like? Now pay attention to the image project, your dignity is indeed indecent. Although I am a monkey, I still wear a suit and tie every day. Actually, I wasn't used to it at first, because I didn't like to take a shower and tickle all day long, so I had to loosen my tie. Although those immortals were afraid of me, none of them wanted to approach me. Since I became a Buddha, I have gradually realized that if everyone is not close to you, and gradually everyone forgets about you, then when you are promoted, no one will say good things for you. I didn't know it at first, because I loved to tickle and people laughed at me in private. Later, Taibai told me the truth, and I was enlightened. Since then, I have placed large full-length mirrors everywhere in my palace, and even the office building has built a private bath. I also hired an image consultant, did plastic surgery, and plucked all the excess hair on my face (it hurts). Next, I'm going to pluck the hair off my body.

Hua Tuo, an old man, doesn't want to be a good vice president of medicine, but wants to be the Minister of Finance. Alas, the world is declining, and everyone wants to get rich. Look at him, he has a big basket of scientific and technological achievements, but 2000 years have passed, and he is still in tatters. But he can't be blamed, the president Zhuang Zhou only knows how to drink and sleep all day long, and of course the business is not good. Recently, he had sleepwalking again, and Hua Tuo couldn't be cured, so he suspected that Hua Tuo didn't do his best, so he gave Hua Tuo small shoes to wear. Of course, Hua Tuo has to find another way.

Look for an opportunity, if you have time to go to the Western Moroccan world, the foreigner's kung fu is really not covered! As long as you want, I will take you to the West when I have the opportunity, cut your pig's nose, and change your nose. As for the color of my hair, hehe, it's blonde in vogue these days. The post-born immortals who don't know the details of the bottom asked me to inquire which beauty hall was dyed their hair in, and I sold it and let them guess :) Hahaha.

The only pity is that the height is too low, alas.

You always look down on Sha Seng, it's your fault. You said that Lao Sun was arrogant, that was in the past. Now you are more proud and grumbling than I am. You should change it too. In all fairness, the sand monk has his strengths. Neither of us is an opponent. You said that when you learn from the scriptures, you run the most errands, which is good. But, if you think about it, why are you the one who runs the errands? Why do you still say you're lazy? I'm the same, why it's all up to me to subdue demons and eliminate monsters, but I've been punished the most? Why should you put the light of the mantra on me, and give me a warning from time to time? After becoming a Buddha, I thought about it a lot, especially after I heard that Sha Seng became the head of the organization. It turns out that the sand monk is the most scheming! Ten thousand times stronger than you, better than me! Think about it, the sand monk is rushing to carry the burden, and we are both impatient with such trivial matters, but how much can a burden weigh? Heavier than your nail rake? Needless to say, my golden hoop stick, even the weapons of the sand monk are all immortal weapons. People are willing to choose. The crux of the matter is not the weight of the burden, but the robe, which is the treasure of the master's heart and liver. In this way, there is not much danger of a life-and-death struggle. The hairs on my face have been burned so that they haven't grown up yet (okay, I don't have to pluck them). You have also escaped death many times, and the sand monk has suffered the least. The burden of the sand monk does not leave his shoulders for a moment, the master does not say anything, and he likes it tightly in his heart! Don't look at the youngest official named by the Buddha, the master has not forgotten. It is said that when promoting the head of the organization, Sha Seng's most powerful backer was the master.

Sha Seng is not only shrewd, but he also has one of the greatest advantages: no one can be offended, no matter who is wrong. Silent all day long, when the Buddha sent people to investigate, the comments he got were: deep and heavy, loyal and reliable. Enough, just those two sentences are enough. What better quality to be an organization minister than to be deep and heavy, not to talk nonsense? What could be more suitable to be your own cronies than being loyal and reliable, and not being a troublemaker behind your back? You're a smart man, I don't need to say more.

If you ask him to do something, don't always speak ill of him. Sha Seng has scheming, but of course his business ability is limited, and there are many people who are not convinced. In business, he couldn't find any better tricks, so he had to ask everyone to study politics. Everyone knows that talking about politics is false, and what it really means is to require everyone to obey the organizational arrangements. Alas, it's not easy for the sand monk.

I still have a lot to do, Taibai told me to drink in the afternoon, Laojun told me to go to Pindan in the evening, and tomorrow I have to mediate the dispute between the king of procrastination (:)) and his third son. It's annoying. Actually, I envy you very much, you are unofficial and light. When will I be able to retire? Alas, who made me a cadre of the Heavenly Realm. I had to do my best in the heavenly realm, and then I died. Don't go into details. I hope my brother will understand.

Brother: Fight to defeat the Buddha

(Official Seal)

Calendar year, month and day

And: I will advise the sand monk, don't worry. I heard that the Nether sells height-increasing insoles, so I have time to send me two. My shoe size is size 35.