"I returned to China in mid-July that year, and my plan was to stay in China for a month and spend time with her wherever she worked. I thought at the time, after knowing each other for a year, the relationship and relationship between the two have not made much progress, all because the online love is too illusory to communicate at a deep level, and if they meet face-to-face, they will be more aware of each other's personalities and thoughts. If you don't get along, at least you don't have to waste each other's time, if the development goes well, you will return to China next summer to get married, and if the relationship grows by leaps and bounds, you will get married directly. ”

"I really didn't think at the time, there was another possibility, she would suddenly lose interest in me. Shao Chengzhi smiled self-deprecatingly.

Just before she graduated, her relative was finally willing to take action and arranged for her to work at the provincial TV station as an entertainment program editor. She never dreamed that such a big pie would fall from the sky, because at that time, the classmates who were looking for good jobs were about to go to report. She told me that there was still a three-month probationary period after joining the TV station, and she had to perform well before she could be retained. I am very happy for her and encourage her to work hard. She asked me, what should I do? I said it didn't matter, I went to live in a rented room in the county for a month, and I was busy with my own business during the day -- I was writing my first paper in the United States, and I would go to her in the evening after she got off work. ”

"But just two or three days before I returned to China, she suddenly told me that I didn't have to go back to China, saying that she had just started working now and wanted to behave well, so she was very stressed and busy, working overtime until late at night every day, and had no time to accompany me, so she asked me not to come. I was stunned and didn't know what was going on, but the ticket was no longer refundable. I had no choice but to tell her that I was going back to China to visit relatives, and I just went to visit her by the way, so I wouldn't disturb her. She repeatedly said that she didn't have time to see me, and finally reluctantly agreed to let me stop by to see her. In fact, it is not a good way to go back to my hometown from Beijing to the provincial capital, but I can't take care of it so much. I spent a week in Beijing, met up with friends and fellow villagers, and booked a train ticket to hers. ”

"I stayed in the provincial capital for a total of seven days, and she saw me three times. The first meeting was the night after I arrived, it was almost 11 o'clock, and she came to see me at the guest house where I was staying, and we sat for 20 minutes. I wanted to take her back to the TV dormitory, but she wouldn't let her, and a year ago, every time I dropped her off at her door, she insisted that I go in and sit for a while. The second meeting was a day apart, also after 10 p.m., and I sat for less than 20 minutes without saying a few words, and the third time was the same. She was very cold and reluctant to me, and she said that she was busy and tired as soon as we met. After seeing them three times like this, I knew that there was no point in me staying any longer, in fact, from the first time we met, I knew that I was out of play, and I didn't understand why I was still there for a few days. ”

"After I bought my train ticket, I called her and told her that I was going back to my hometown. She said goodbye to me on the phone, saying she was too busy to drop me off. I said, "Okay." ”

"I stayed at home for two weeks and then went back to Beijing to board my flight. Li Zhao gave me an analysis, he suspected that someone on the TV station was pursuing her, and she was a veteran of the love scene, she was dizzy, otherwise even if she didn't want to marry me, she should be polite to me and use me as a spare tire. I said not necessarily, maybe she felt that it was too risky to marry and go abroad with a man she didn't really know, and the job of the TV station was so good, it was better to work her own to earn a more reliable future. Li Zhao scolded me for being stupid, she didn't want to be a star, wasn't she just a backstage editor, she couldn't be famous, she couldn't even know this. She may have been overjoyed when I said that the job had fallen from the sky, and that I had never made a clear commitment to her, so she felt that she should focus on what she had already done. We can't discuss anything, and there's no need to discuss it anymore, anyway, the ending is there."

"Whatever her reason. Your friend is right, she should be polite to you and use you as a spare tire. Ling Ran said lightly, "However, girls who have just graduated from college, after all, are still stupid, not so experienced, and tactful." ”

"When I went back to the United States, a few friends took me to the capital airport. Just as I was about to board the plane, my heart suddenly moved and I called her," Shao Chengzhi said.

"She told you not to go, she will book a plane ticket to Beijing immediately" Ling Ran was excited, and her mind was opened.

"It's not. Shao Chengzhi smiled bitterly, "She was very cold to me, and she said a few polite words to me on the phone, wishing me a smooth journey, and hung up the phone." ”

"Oh. Ling Ran was greatly disappointed.

Her reaction was what I expected, I didn't expect her to be nice to me again, I just couldn't control myself from wanting to hear her voice one last time. Shao Chengzhi explained, "I was amazed by myself: the moment she hung up. I suddenly had the feeling that I had never been before—I wanted to marry her, I really wanted to marry her right away. For the first time in my life, I felt heart-wrenching and painful because she had rejected me. And if she hadn't rejected me, I wouldn't have had the pain of not being able to marry her, and I might not even want to marry her right away. ”

Ling Ran rolled her eyes: "It's really cheap." ”

"Yes, that's a shit. Shao Chengzhi also thought it was funny.

The two were silent for a few seconds, and Shao Chengzhi continued, "But then, she took the initiative to contact me again, half a year after I returned to the United States. ”

"Although I wanted to marry her at the airport, it was only a momentary impulse after all. When I returned to the U.S., I had calmed down. I can accept her sudden indifference, after all, we haven't really dated, and we don't have any feelings at all. When going abroad is no longer attractive to her, I naturally lose my attraction to her, which I can fully understand and accept. I just thought we'd never be in touch again. When she suddenly contacted me again on q-q, I had actually forgotten about her. Shao Chengzhi stopped again.

"Why, she wants to continue the edge. Ling Ran said.

"Yes, she wants to restore the old relationship. Shao Chengzhi smiled bitterly, "I really don't know how to deal with it."

"She didn't explain why she changed and didn't even make a transition in between?"

"Well, I didn't ask her, but she explained. She still said the same thing, during that time, she had just started working, she was still in the probationary period, and she wanted to stay, so she was very busy and didn't have time to be with me" Shao Chengzhi shook his head, "Actually, she didn't need to explain at all. ”

Ling Ran smiled: "Actually, she didn't tell the truth, what tempted her back then, made her suddenly feel unattractive to marry you, and now what setbacks have made you her the best choice again." To put it bluntly, even if you can't get back to the old ways, at least you can come to an understanding. ”

Shao Chengzhi sighed: "Yes, in fact, she might as well put it bluntly." I don't mind that the girl wants to marry me because I graduated from a prestigious school, studied in the United States for a doctorate, and can go abroad if I marry me. If I don't have these, what does a beautiful girl like about me, does it look like my family is poor, I don't look tall or handsome, I look boring in the field of mate selection and mating, males are always in a position to be chosen, and only those who can prove their excellent quality are qualified to let their genes pass down. All my advantages in the marriage market are spread out on the table anyway, how can I have any idea because the girl looks at or does not look down on my conditions. ”

"When she rejected me so bluntly, I had a lot of respect for her, whether she met another man, or for the great future of the TV station, anyway, she rejected me, so I didn't hesitate to lose the opportunity to go abroad by getting married. No matter how lost I am, I still have a layer of respect for her. But she came to me again and said that she wanted to restore her old friendship with me, but there was no real explanation. All of a sudden, I "

Ling Ran nodded: "The whole person, the whole thing, including her IQ, is all underestimated by you." ”

Shao Chengzhi nodded: "Yes." If I had known that she would contact me, I would have blocked her on q-q, then I could at least keep a beautiful back, there was a girl who arrogantly abandoned me"

So you immediately blocked her. Ling Ran speculated.

"No, I really don't. I'm embarrassed to block her, and there's no need for that - I've put this thing down in my mind, and I care about having one more Q-Q contact. Later, she began to contact me on q-q every day, and I replied casually when I had time, and told her that I was busy when I didn't have time, and there was nothing to do anyway, so I was just an ordinary netizen. Shao Chengzhi paused, "But in a blink of an eye, it's almost summer vacation again." She asked me if I would go back to China again, if I would go to see her again, and she said that it was not that I wanted to fulfill my promise and marry her, but that she now had a stable job and time, and that we could meet again this year and develop a relationship. ”

Ling Ran laughed narrowly: "Did you agree? Did you agree in one bite, so as to fulfill your long-cherished wish and marry her." ”

"How is it possible, why should I go back to China for her again?" Shao Chengzhi couldn't cry or laugh, "And I can't return to China again and again, spending so much time, money and energy, just to develop a relationship." She and I both understood that if I went back to China for her again, it would be only to get married, because I had already paid so much for nothing. ”

She may not understand that some girls think that a man's toss back and forth from the United States to China for her is just a small test of love. Ling Ran smiled, "Then what should you do?"

"I don't know what to do, I haven't been in a relationship with a girl, and I don't know how to say no to a girl directly. I had no choice but to stop talking to her. I didn't block her so she would find out that I didn't want to hurt her self-esteem. I just don't reply to her anymore. Later, when I contacted China, Skype became popular, and the Q-Q account was completely abolished, and we broke off contact. Shao Chengzhi said, "Isn't it a little unkind?"

"I can't talk about it. Ling Ran said indifferently, "Anyway, no matter what you do, she will be dissatisfied." If you reject her directly, she will say that you have hurt her, why don't you be tactful; if you refuse tactfully, ignore her, she will say why don't you give her a clear answer and let her wait in vain; if you block her, she will say why you are so ungentlemanly, it is simply unreasonable, in short, what you do is wrong. ”

"Well, yes, I know that, so I don't want to talk any more nonsense with her. I took what I thought was the most tactful, and I didn't care what she thought. Shao Chengzhi said.

Ling Ran understood, Shao Chengzhi's personality is calm and low-key, he does things sharply, and he doesn't leak, but the girl's personality is not so sensitive, and she was deceived by Shao Chengzhi's gentle and wooden appearance, and she thought that she really had the possibility of recovery, so she had to inch in, thinking about what was wrong, and still thinking about Shao Chengzhi's promise of "returning to China this year to develop a relationship, and returning to China next year to marry you", hoping that his love will be fulfilled, in fact, people have already sentenced him to death, and they don't tell you directly, just to save some face for you.

Ling Ran suddenly discovered that in fact, Shao Chengzhi was just like he said, with a stubborn personality and limited room for change. This man is very cautious when he encounters something important and dilemma, and will not make a judgment easily, but will observe it carefully over time, and even call his close friends to provide advice from his advisers, but once he has made a judgment, it is the doomsday judgment, and it is difficult to change it; moreover, this man does things very step-by-step, not impatient, and develops steadily, once the plan is formulated, he will not easily change the direction of action until it is proven to be unworkable; but once the plan is abolished, it will be completely abandoned, whether there is any nostalgia at all, and under the surface of mildness and obedience is an iron heart that will not give in。

At the same time, Ling Ran also understood why Shao Chengzhi said to her last time: "You went abroad to study because you want to keep this love in your heart forever?"

It turned out that he had such a painful pain - the old love affair that had died in his heart suddenly reappeared in the most unsightly image, and directly destroyed all the memories.

That day, when Shao Chengzhi asked Ling Ran if he forced him to leave China to avoid his enthusiasm for Ye Ling from fading. Ling Ran's first reaction was to deny it, but in the deepest part of her heart, an intuition floated from the darkness, and instinctively told her: Shao Chengzhi's statement was right, although between him and Ye Ling, in order to conquer him, seduction and scheming, passion and pain, madness and hatred, Ye Ling could not hang her for a lifetime, no matter how fragrant the bait was soaked in the water for a long time, it would be tasteless When she ran out of calculations, when she understood that Ye Ling would indeed not marry her, when love lost and finally had his beautiful phantom support, she couldn't maintain her enthusiasm。 In addition, both of them understand that such a love-hate obsession, such a game of chess against opponents, can only be played once in life. Therefore, she can only leave, only life and death, only far away from the ocean, can the pain and passion that cannot be loved be eternal

At this moment, Ling Ran had a new feeling: Ye Ling, may we never see each other again in this life, let you always be the unpicked rose in my heart, let me always be the back of the arrogant departure in your heart, let us cherish the beauty in our memory, and never see our former lovers again.

We want to freeze love, eternal memory, because we are loving, but one day, we no longer love, and the * that wants to keep love will decline. So unconsciously, forgetting has come, and what we thought we would never forget, so unconsciously abandoned by us, and man's instinct to find happiness, let us be ready to devote ourselves to the next love before we realize it.

After Shao Chengzhi finished speaking, the two fell silent. Ling Ran took a sip of the slightly cold coffee, thoughtful: "You have been in such a relationship, and no other girl has left a trace in your heart?"

30 years old, that's too little.

"Well, I don't have much chance of interacting with girls. Shao Chengzhi was embarrassed, "Are you going to try me out today?" Okay, I also had a crush on a girl, but I never fell in love. Even Li Zhao didn't know about this. ”