I sighed heavily and said, "You must have been very sad at that time, right? ”

"It's quite sad, I feel as if I'm back to that stage of depression, I can't get interested in anything, and I slowly start to degenerate...... Many of the students have gone out to work, some have entered the National Arts Center, some have become dancers, and some have become teachers......

I, on the other hand, was still in school, and I couldn't accept Master's departure, and I washed my face with tears almost every day. ”

I smiled bitterly and said, "It seems that your life is really up and down!" ”

Sun Xiaoxiao let out a long sigh and said, "Who said it wasn't?" It took me a long time to come out, but I had lost all kinds of job opportunities. During that time, I was confused for a long time, until I came into contact with self-media......

I started posting videos of my old dancing at school on Douyin, but I didn't expect it to suddenly become popular...... Then a company came to me, and that's how I began to embark on the road of self-media. ”

After listening to what Sun Xiaoxiao said, I had mixed feelings in my heart, and I couldn't describe the tastes and feelings.

It turns out that in this world, everyone has their own unspeakable secrets and regrets that they can't forget.

As far as Sun Xiaoxiao has experienced, he is no better than me.

As a girl, it is not easy for her to carry it and live so well now.

She asked me again for cigarettes, and I finally said to her, "Stop smoking!" I don't like girls smoking. ”

"You know, I don't usually smoke, but I'm a little unhappy right now."

"If you're not happy, say something happy, and don't smoke anyway."

"Okay, okay, listen to you, don't smoke."

After a moment's pause, she said to me again, "So, you should know by now why I have to let you live in my house, right?" I'm afraid you won't be able to think about it suddenly, because I'm from the past, and I understand the severity of depression too well. ”

I nodded and replied in a deep voice, "I know, but don't worry, I won't be so uneasy, I still have things to do." ”

Sun Xiaoxiao was stunned and said, "Is it the thing you said before that you want to earn 10 million?" ”

I nodded, and Sun Xiaoxiao said again: "It's not difficult for me, but why do you have to make 10 million?" Why? ”

"For Anlan."

Sun Xiaoxiao was stunned again, and said in confusion: "What does it mean, I don't understand." ”

So I told Sun Xiaoxiao about Anlan's courtyard that was sealed by the court, and the 10 million was to redeem the house.

After hearing this, Sun Xiaoxiao sighed: "You are really infatuated!" If only you were my boyfriend, there are really not many dedicated men like you now...... To be honest, there are not many women, and now love seems to be a game for the brave, and no one dares to say love easily. ”

I didn't want to talk about these things, so I digressed from the topic and asked her, "By the way, does the guy you liked in high school know about how you've changed?" ”

"I know for sure! I'm so famous now, but we're completely out of touch with each other. ”

"Then he should regret it!"

"What does it have to do with me, I still have to thank him, if he hadn't rejected me at the beginning and said so many ugly things about me, I guess I wouldn't have achieved what I am today."

"That's just as well." I nodded in agreement.

……

We chatted all the way, and although we stopped and stopped all the way because of the traffic jam, we still felt like we were at my accommodation in a short time.

When I was about to get out of the car, Sun Xiaoxiao stopped me and said, "Do you want to stop thinking about it and come with me to live with me?" ”

"No, I know you're kind, and I want to be alone."

"Okay, then I won't persuade you, bye."

I stood there and watched her leave before I slowly returned home.

On a rainy night alone, I was a little lonely, looking at the lights of thousands of homes outside the window, and I lost my mind for a while.

I cooked myself a bowl of noodles and just stayed in front of the TV, eating noodles while watching a boring TV series.

Whenever I am alone, I always think crankily, and the person who thinks about it is naturally Anlan, and I can't forget her, because she has given me the happiest time.

Did you really just disappear from my world? I don't believe it, and I still don't.

When I hear about what it's like to go to hell, it's going to be very painful.

But I'm not afraid to go to hell, I'm afraid to go down to hell only to find out that there is no you in hell at all!

Anlan, do you know?

Ever since I drank the wine you brewed with love, I would have been thirsty for the rest of my life if I hadn't refilled the glass.

Looking out the window at the bustling city, I suddenly resented the bustle and hustle and bustle of the city, which overwhelmed my Anlan with the coldness of reinforced concrete.

I don't believe your presence is a punishment from heaven.

I miss you!

Anlan ......

I don't believe you've just disappeared, I don't believe that you've sunk my world into obscurity after you poured a ray of sunshine into my empty and silent life.

Standing on the balcony, I looked at the city in the rain and fog, and the glow of those neon lights drowning out all the joys and sorrows of the city.

This is just a city suitable for selling youth, and love is only a luxury of youth after all, and it is unattainable.

Looking into the depths of the night sky, there is an impenetrable vastness, and I am floating like a ghost in the vast time.

Loss, ignorance, hesitation, and some unspeakable helplessness and sadness......

I knew that she wouldn't appear again, and I knew that she had completely left this world, but I was just unwilling.

Maybe this is love, even if there is a wound, even if there are tears, I look forward to the small possibility.

If you just meet and can't stay, it's really better not to meet.

I don't want to admit it and I won't be reconciled, she is a passerby in my life.

Thoughts come like a tide.

She gave me sunshine, she taught me to smile, so who can teach me to forget?

Anlan, I really miss you.

The night was completely silent, the neon lights outside the window were dimly lit through the glass, and the room was eerily silent.

I was dazed, lying in the corner of the couch like a dead dog, falling asleep......

I had a dream that was chaotic and psychedelic......

It was as if I had entered an unknown world, a world that was so unreal, just like in a painting.

Everything in the dream has a jagged outline, and the surface of all the fillers is covered with a very bright ink.

This world can be touched, even the air can be touched, and the stars in the sky can be touched.

As soon as you stir it, everything around you disappears, but soon new items appear.

I also saw An Lan in a dream, she was standing in front of me in a very plain white dress, she was smiling, and her smile was very sweet.

But I couldn't touch her, I could touch everything around me, but I couldn't touch her.

I was in a hurry, but she was so close to me, but she made me feel far away.

Far away as snow on an iceberg, crystal clear and holy.

I lunged at her, but I fell into the air, and she giggled, very real.

I was still unwilling, and despite the countless falls, I kept trying to catch her.

But she gradually began to disappear, gradually becoming transparent......

I was scared and woke up!