Guan Cancan sat on the hospital bed in a daze, his mind full of the scene of Si Jianyu being pushed out of the emergency room, "I...... I'm going to see him!" she stood up again.

"Hey, Si Jianyu hasn't woken up yet, you might as well take a good rest first!" Su Ai said busily, wanting to persuade.

But Guan Cancan still insisted on staggering towards the outside of the ward.

"Alright, alright, I'll go with you. Su Aiao couldn't resist Guan Cancan's insistence, and helped her friend to walk towards Si Jianyu's ward.

The two wards were very close to each other, and they only walked a few steps to the front of Si Jianyu's ward, but Lu Lifang stopped at the door of the room, obviously not meaning to let people in.

"Ah Yu is still unconscious. Lu Lifang said lightly.

"I know. Guan Cancan said, "I want to see him." "Whether he is awake or unconscious.

Lu Lifang looked at Guan Cancan deeply, and after a while, he turned his head to Su Ai and said, "Can I have a few words with her alone?"

Su Ai looked at her friend with some concern.

Guan Cancan said, "Xiaoai, you go back first, I'm fine." ”

"But......" Su Ai was still a little uneasy.

"You've been with me for so long, and it's late now, and I'm not seriously ill, and if anything happens to me, Lu ...... At least he won't call a doctor for me, sir. Guan Cancan said.

Su Ai could naturally see that what Lu Lifang wanted to say to Guan Cancan was obviously not suitable for him to hear, so he didn't insist anymore, Su Ai just whispered a few words to Guan Cancan, and asked Guan Cancan to call her if there was any situation, and then turned around and left.

Guan Cancan stood at the door of the ward with Lu Lifang like this. Her cheeks, with fever, showed an abnormal crimson, and her body was shaky and weak, as if it required a great deal of strength to even stand.

"You want to see Ah Yu now, if it's just because of guilt, then I advise you, it's better not to watch it. Lu Lifang said mercilessly, "Ah Yu's lack has never been your guilt. ”

"I ......" Guan Cancan's hands fell to his side, clutching the pants of the hospital gown tightly. Is it guilt? If it was just guilt, then why did her heart hurt so much, and why did she look for him in the river regardless of life and death.

At that time, she didn't even think that once she spent too much time in the river, with her strength and water nature, she might not even be able to save her own life.

At that time, there was nothing in her mind, no fear, no hesitation, no family, not even ...... Even her favorite smile didn't come to mind.

All she had to think about was to find him and save him!

"It's not guilt. Guan Cancan replied.

"So what kind of feelings did you have when you came to see Ah Yu?" Lu Lifang asked again.

Guan Cancan opened his mouth, but he couldn't say anything, he was concerned, worried, wanted to make sure of his safety, and wanted to accompany him to wake up...... And all of that......

Lu Li snorted coldly, this hum was like some kind of sarcasm.

"Do you not want to say it, do you not want to say it?" or do you not even understand yourself?" he said, "You don't have to tell me, but there is another thing, I must ask." ”

Lu Lifang's voice paused, and his voice deepened and asked, "What happened between you and Ah Yu that made him fall into the river?"

This question, in the few hours that Ah Yu was in a coma, he thought about a lot of possibilities, and also browsed the relevant news on the Internet with his mobile phone, knowing that Guan Cancan held a press conference today, and even agreed to Ah Yu's marriage proposal in public at the press conference.

However, no one could have imagined that such a change would occur less than an hour after the end of the press conference.

Obviously, judging from the photos posted by others on the Internet, Ah Yu was so happy at that time, that kind of smile from the heart, when Lu Lifang saw it, there was a hot current in his eyes.

It had been a long time since he had seen Ah Yu smile like this, as if his life had regained some hope of living.

How much despair should there be for Ah Yu to take the initiative to give up his own life again?

Lu Lifang didn't know, so he had to figure out the reason.

Guan Cancan's body shook suddenly, her hands couldn't help but tighten tighter, her teeth bit her lip flap tightly, almost biting her lip flap to bleed, and after a long time, she said hoarsely, "I...... I said to Yu that I married him just because I was smiling, and there was no other reason for that, I ...... I won't love him. ”

Lu Li let out a sigh and looked at the person in front of him, "Guan Cancan, these words, you are really ruthless enough to say them! If you have never given him hope, then he may not be so desperate, but after you have given hope, if you say such things again, then the blow to him will be far greater than before!"

Guan Cancan lowered his head, and Yu's despair ...... It's all from her...... And why did she say that? Knowing that her words would be a kind of harm to him, she still said it so ruthlessly.

It's her selfishness, selfishness just wants to protect herself from harm, but she forgets to think about it, he is being hurt by her over and over again.

"Guan Cancan, the only person who can let Ah Yu die, but you are letting him die again and again! He survived two years ago, and now he has survived, so what about the future? Next time, do you say he can still survive?" Lu Lifang's voice pulled back her contemplation of self-blame.

Guan Cancan suddenly remembered that Lu Lifang had said before that it was not the first time that Ah Yu had done this.

Her lips quivered, and her voice asked dryly, "Two years ago, what happened?"

Lu Li raised his eyes to look at her and said sarcastically, "Do you really want to know?"

This feeling is as if there is a black cloth in front of her eyes all the time, all she sees is pitch black, and when this black cloth is revealed, when those facts that she didn't know are placed in front of her, maybe she will not be able to bear it.

But...... Even so, she wanted to know and wanted to know what happened to Yu at that time.

"Ever since you left, Ah Yu has been looking for you, and he often drinks a lot of wine, saying that he may be drunk and can see you. And his mental side is also becoming more and more manic, restless, and cold, and the reason for this is partly insomnia, and more, I think, is because of you. The more he can't find you, the more desperate he becomes. Then two years ago, the night of your car accident, I don't know how long he played the piano, when I went to look for him in the apartment where you used to live, his ten fingers were so swollen that he was bruised. Lu Li said quietly, and the vivid memory of that night seemed to reappear in front of him.

If he could, he would never remember what he saw, the room was full of wine bottles, and Ah Yu was at the piano like a dead man.

"Because of insomnia, Ah Yu usually takes some diazepam tablets every day, but that day, he swallowed all the bottles, and when I found him, there were only a few pills scattered on the ground, and an empty medicine bottle!

Lu Lifang's words, like a heavy hammer, slammed into Guan Cancan's heart, making her heart ache for a while. Laughing...... Laughing......

When Yu Zai fell to the river, he also faced her with a smile on the corner of his lips.

Such a gorgeous smile is like blooming the last beauty in the face of death. Or maybe for him, it is better to die than to live, because he lives and only gets pain from her again and again.

"And he still has the fable you left behind in his arms. Lu Lifang continued, "After you left, Ah Yu often read this book, read it repeatedly, and when he saw that every story could be memorized word for word, he was still watching. He said, "It's something you left behind, and looking at the book, it's like you can hear you reading to him." And when he was admitted to the hospital, he was obviously unconscious, but the book was still held very tightly and tightly, as if he was afraid that he would lose it. ”

At this moment, Guan Cancan's face was already covered with tears, and every word Lu Lifang said, not a word, was telling her about the facts she didn't know.

While she was in Vienna, quietly burying the past and enjoying a new life, he was here, constantly suffering and suffering. But he had never told her any of this.

Yes, a man like him, this pain, this kind of suffering, how can he say it?

What he said was that he would always love her very much, that he wanted her forgiveness, that he would start over with her, that he would give her a very happy life......

But she never wanted to believe it, and made him hurt more seriously again and again.

"I'm sorry...... I do not know...... I didn't know anything like this had happened to him......" Tears flowed down her cheeks, and she kept saying sorry.

I don't know his injury, I don't know his pain, and I don't know this despair, which has been wrapped around him from the moment she left.

"There's so much you don't know. You don't know, even though Ah Yu washed his stomach at that time, he was still in a coma, but he was able to wake up because of the words 'As long as you wake up, you will definitely be able to find Guan Cancan'; you don't know that he is getting worse and worse because of you, headaches and mental self-control; you don't know, what he said the most is how he should live without you!" Lu Li said, "Guan Cancan, if Ah Yu was really wrong back then, then the torture in the past five years is enough!"