After laughter.

Qu Xiaoyun continued: "I love the story I told today, because of what? Because it's scary! I don't know if you guys are bold or cowardly? ”

"Daring !!"

The audience responded in unison.

Qu Xiaoyun nodded, pointed to the exit of the theater, and joked: "Okay, if you are bold, please go out!" ”

"Appeal !!"

The audience laughed and booed.

Qu Xiaoyun smiled and waved his hand: "The so-called cowardice is said to be like that, and it can't really scare you all into anything, at most, you don't dare to go to the toilet alone in the middle of the night after going home at night!" ”

"Hahaha~~"

Qu Xiaoyun put away his smile and said: "Today's story happened in Jincheng, it is a strange case in the Republic of China, I may say half of it later, you go to search on the Internet when you are done, you search according to the person's name and storyline, you may not be able to search it today, next time I say this, you can still come!" ”

"Appeal !!"

"The name of the story I'm going to talk about today is "The Human Meat Shop"!" Qu Xiaoyun accentuated his tone in the last few words.

"Good !!"

The audience, who loves to listen to stand-ups, likes this kind of story with a bit of horror elements, and they have sent applause and applause.

Seeing that the audience liked to listen, Qu Xiaoyun was very happy, nodded and said:

"Nine rivers under the tip of Tianjin Wei, three pontoon bridges and two passes. First of all, a brief introduction to this place, Jincheng is the place of retreating from the sea, the retreating place is the sea falling down to expose a piece of flat land, until the king of Yan swept the north of Jincheng began to be inhabited, slowly there were troops stationed here, and then there were ordinary people to come, gradually more and more abundant, there is Jincheng! ”

"So it shows that there is no history of Jincheng before the dynasty, the unique water and soil have a unique folk customs, and the people of Jincheng have three rules in their old age, one is not allowed to ask where you live, why? There is no fixed place to live, that will be in addition to the particularly rich owner to buy a house, most people are renting a house, renting a house to make a lot of money and turn around and leave, the same reason, maybe the owner suddenly fell down, originally lived very well, and now moved to a poor place, so you ask people where to live is not suitable! ”

"The second is that you can't ask people what they do, because Jincheng has a unique job called playing eight forks, the so-called eight forks is to do everything, in the morning as a buddy, in the afternoon to sell fish, and in the evening to Nanshi to say cross talk, all the money is earned, so it is not appropriate to ask what to do!"

"The third is that you can't ask people how much money they make, it is possible to earn 30,000 yuan a day this month, and 350 yuan a day next month, so it is not appropriate to ask how much money you make! It is such a unique folk style! ”

This is also a major feature of stand-up comedy, broken and crumpled everywhere to tell the audience in place, just telling the story is the story counselor.

Speaking of this short paragraph, the audience was very quiet, and the audience listened to it and looked forward to the next story.

Qu Xiaoyun continued: "In addition, there is a special product in Jincheng, that is, gangsters, I don't know which of you is familiar with this industry, there is still a difference between gangsters and hooligans, he is mixed in all walks of life. The gangsters in Jincheng have unique regional characteristics, such as his love of self-harm! You see, the ruffians and hooligans in the place fight each other, but the gangsters in Jincheng beat themselves! ”

"Poof~"

The audience laughed after hearing this.

"Look at this thing, he turned his face when he met and talked about it, he stretched out his fingers and cut this meat at you with a knife, are you afraid! If you look at you, you will panic, and you will be afraid of him! ”

"There is also a fight between the two sides to grab the dock, and other places may be fighting each other with axes and knives. Jincheng is not, put ten oil pots, grab the people on both sides of the dock, one person jumps into the pot on one side, and in the end, which side does not dare to jump, which side loses, and this place will be let out! ”

"It's right to say it, history knows Chentangguan, Chentangguan is in Jincheng, Nezha and his father fought, cut his own flesh and returned it to his father, this thing it has been taught!"

"Hahaha~~"

The metaphor is very funny, and the audience is amused again.

Qu Xiaoyun continued: "The gangsters in Jincheng also talk about the rules, generally speaking, once in three or five years, all the gangsters in Jincheng will fight together, for example, tomorrow it is agreed that the fight will start on a certain commercial street, and these gangsters will notify all the buyers and sellers the first day, for example, the fight will start at ten o'clock and finish at twelve o'clock, they will do what they say!" ”

"The gangsters don't knock on the door, don't open the door, because they want to clean the battlefield, sweep it clean, splash it with water, and make it all good, and then knock on the door to inform the merchants, and speak very politely, this is a very unique culture!"

"But this will inevitably alarm the government sometimes, the lord generally does not dare to provoke the gangsters, you hit him after you catch one, he doesn't shout pain when he hits, the gangster's internal industry has a requirement, it has to be happy when it is beaten, if anyone shouts out the pain, this is over, it is spurned by the industry, and he is not qualified to do this business in the future!"

"Thank you while being beaten, after beating him, his wave of more than 100 people and 200 people are here - please, sir, beat us too, the rain and dew are all wet! There are about 40 people at your yamen, and he has 300 thugs, can you beat them? So this official let them get it too! ”

After listening to this, the audience couldn't help but give a thumbs up, and many first-time listeners didn't expect that although the young man on the stage was young, he really knew a lot!

Qu Xiaoyun changed his words and said: "But he can't let you be so rampant forever, later the Qing Dynasty had a severe crackdown, and the officials were very powerful, and they arrested a lot of big gangsters and small gangsters in Jincheng, and gave them two ways after being arrested!" ”

"One is to repent and rehabilitate and let you go, how can you repent and rehabilitate? From those low-grade weathered places in Jincheng, find some women who have lost their footing, and you have to find the one who is not enough to identify, and find them to stand in the lobby with an open crotch pants, if you say to reform yourself, you will get under her legs, drill over and shout your mother, this stumbling woman promises you, you hit this climb to the lobby to go out of this door, you will be acquitted and go to a new life! ”

"This is a great insult to the thugs, but if you don't agree, the other way is to kill your head on the spot! You pick, or recognize your own mother, or kill your head! This thing, people really want to live when they die! At that moment, almost all the big and small gangsters in Jincheng recognized their mothers, of course, it is impossible to do this business from then on, and you will not be allowed in this industry! ”

Qu Xiaoyun stretched out a finger and said in an accentuated tone: "There is only one person, this person's surname is Wang, called Wang Er Ruthless, if he doesn't agree, then kill the head, on the execution ground, his wife watched, this lord cried once!" kowtowed to the old lady, and she died with a knife! Who is the most powerful person in Tsujo since then? It's this king and two ruthless! ”

"Wang Er has a younger brother, named Wang Jinhua, who is famous and delicate, because his brother is too horizontal, I hope this child is stable like a girl, so he gave this name! has grown up, and he has arrived in the Republic of China in a flash, this kid is thirty years old, his job is a patrol officer, he helps out on the street, and he has a bowl of Anle tea and rice anyway! ”

"On this day, the above informed him, saying that he would shoot the prisoner in a few days, let him keep an eye on the point, the location is in Xiaowangzhuang, the place was very desolate in the past, and the shooting prisoner was there. Wang Jinhua has a friend who sells livestock at home, and this friend came to him and wanted him to do a favor! ”

"What's the busy? The condemned prisoners were tied with a rope, and after the shooting, the rope was stained with blood, and his friend wanted the rope, and wanted to use the rope to tie the livestock, thinking that it would ward off evil spirits, and now we all know that it is nonsense, but in the early years, everyone believed in this, they were all friends, and Wang Jinhua agreed! ”

"The book should be short, after a while, the condemned prisoner was pulled to the execution ground, this kid also did bad things and was heinous, tied up with a rope, a large group of soldiers pressed, the whole execution ground was full of people, I love to see this!"

Qu Xiaoyun gestured as he spoke: "It's time, press the prisoner there, the person next to him is holding a gun to fight, Wang Jinhua is very close, just wait for the gun to go over and untie the rope." A gunshot rang out, the prisoner fell, the rope was stained with blood, and a man who examined the dead body came over with a small iron rod and stabbed him in the back of the head, and if the person did not react, it proved that the person was dead! ”

"It's all over, Wang Jinhua went over to untie the dead man's rope, and untied it in three times and two times, and he was quite satisfied with it in his hand, and there was a lot of blood! I thought in my heart, I would give the rope to my friend for a while, and let my friend invite him to a meal. ”

"I'm happy, 'Teng' all of a sudden!" Qu Xiaoyun was startled.

This is a trick he says this kind of story makes good use of it, and it is a pleasure to interact with the audience.

The audience listened very attentively, and suddenly came to such a voice, and was startled, and many female viewers were frightened and patted their little hearts and adjusted their breathing.

Qu Xiaoyun was very satisfied when he saw this, and said with a smile: "You scared me!" ”

"Appeal !!"

There were bursts of boos from the audience.

Qu Xiaoyun nodded with satisfaction, then put away his smile and continued: "Someone said what's wrong with this? The dead man who had just been shot suddenly stood up, face to face with Wang Jinhua, glared at Wang Jinhua, and stretched out his hand - return my rope! ”

The scene fell silent, and immediately after a bang, Wang Jinhua lay down. This is something that no one could have imagined! Wang Jinhua was lying on the ground, even more trembling than just now! ”

"Hahaha~~"

The audience in the audience made up the picture in their heads, smiling forward and backward.

After laughter.

Qu Xiaoyun continued: "A large group of soldiers came over, kicked this dead man to the ground with three feet and two feet, and followed them to replenish the gun!" We don't know how to explain this situation from a medical point of view, maybe it's not dead, anyway, the soldiers were stuffed later! This scene is messed up, it's okay, a few good buddies came over to get Wang Jinhua and sent him home! ”

After being sent home, the old lady was scared and asked what was going on, Wang Jinhua's buddy told her about it, and asked the old lady not to worry, after giving Wang Jinhua a kang, pour some hot water, and the person eased up. Please come to the doctor, the doctor said it's okay, the conditioning is good, this is also a work injury, give him a few days off, during this period of recuperation, good buddies have also come home to see him. ”

"This afternoon, there was another string of doors, this person's surname is An, called An Lao Liu, the two of them are small, and the relationship between the small ones is very good, An Lao Liu himself works in the shop that sells sauce goods, the craftsmanship is good, and he is very free and willing to go to the water to help people."

Seeing that the audience was at a loss when they listened, Qu Xiaoyun explained: "The Water Club has existed in Jincheng for two or three hundred years, and the so-called Water Club is the guild that fights fires. ”

"There are many houses in the Jincheng Water Society, until later, there were more official fire brigades, and there were still forty or fifty in the Jincheng Water Society! It's also very interesting, every year on June 23, the fire god celebrates his birthday and everyone gathers together to make offerings, and then scatters invitations, and gathers rich people in the place to invite them to dinner, in fact, it is to pull sponsorship, and that money is the fund of the water club. ”

Qu Xiaoyun said that this is fun: "Jincheng is very interesting, for example, where is the fire, this group of water will go there, and if the people who belong to the water club of that segment do not arrive, the first person will not be able to work, and he will not be able to press other people's places." If you arrive, the local water will be working, and when you see the helper coming, the local water will be withdrawn, so that the guests can put out the fire first! ”

"This guest is extinguishing, another wave of people is coming, this wave of guests also has to withdraw, let the new one put out the fire, just because this is not a little delay!"

"Hahaha~~"

"An Lao Liu is a braised meat shop to work, nothing to do when he gets old and can play in the water, I have laid the groundwork for these, because the later books may be used, why do you say it is possible? Because you may not be able to say that! Qu Xiaoyun said this, revealing a wicked smile.

"Appeal !!"

The audience booed again.

Qu Xiaoyun nodded with satisfaction and continued: "An Lao Liu heard that Fa Erxiao was frightened, and he went to visit the dim sum and fruit he bought, and the two brothers chatted about gossip, and An Lao Liu confided in the current situation, saying that he hated the current shopkeeper of the braised meat shop. Buddy Wang Jinhua gave him an idea and suggested that he do it himself. ”

Qu Xiaoyun kicked his hand in his sleeve, imitating the scene of the conversation at that time: "An Laoliu sighed - how easy is it, if you do it yourself, you have to find a face, you have to buy this and that, you have to hire a guy, there is no money!" ”

"Wang Jinhua waved her hand - don't call it a problem, I will give you how much money you calculate, even if I am a shareholder, I will make some money, you have craftsmanship, you find a place, don't hire someone, you come by yourself, get a small door, you can set up a stall at the door, you can stew meat in the house, count the business of the two of us, if you want to earn it, you will share it with me, and then pay me back this book when you get rich, if you don't earn it, you will talk about it, I feel uncomfortable watching you like this!"

Qu Xiaoyun gave a thumbs up and said: "This is a true friend, as soon as he said this, An Lao Liu was moved, so he agreed, he really went to find a place, and two days later he found a place, Wang Jinhua also spoke, and said briefly, the house was rented, the things were purchased, and the business was opened, working for himself was different from working for others, the mood was different, and he was very happy!" ”

……

Romance