"Remember, of course remember, it's because of this place that I was planted in your hands!" I pursed the corners of my lips in frustration.

"That's also because you're too strange, who would have thought that it would rain in the middle of the night and there would be a strange person like you sleeping on the side of the road!" Mu Xichun disagreed.

But think about it, who would have thought that there would be people lying in the shadows of the roadside in the middle of the night when it was still raining.

"Even if my behavior is a little grotesque, can't you get off the lane and apologize! If you get out of the car and say sorry to me, there will be something to come! ”

"I got out of the car and apologized? Don't you know what kind of virtue you were at that time? If I get out of the car, it's hard to guarantee that you won't play your scum character. How can I, a weak woman, protect myself in front of a drunken scumbag? ”

Her words reminded me of that night, but I didn't know there was a beautiful woman in the car at the time, and if I had, I probably wouldn't have been so angry.

Then again, if you think about it from her point of view, she really didn't dare to get out of the car at that time.

Even if she just saw a vicious drunk outside in the car, she was already frightened, how dare she open the car door and come down to apologize?

This was evident from her speeding away. What's more, she didn't know at the time that the incident was caused by a drunk man on the side of the road who was driving her car and getting wet.

"Okay, what's the point of arguing about right and wrong now, anyway, I'm already pinched by you now, you can play as much as you want!" I said with a wry smile.

She scoffed and didn't speak, and drove the car back off. After a while, as if she had suddenly remembered something, she said, "Can you tell me something?" Her tone was tentatively cautious.

"What's the matter?"

"Why...... Why do you feel emotionally upset every time you mention your parents? Can you tell us? Her tone was more cautious, lest I do something unusual.

I was stunned, I didn't expect her to ask this question out of the blue.

I think she probably came to this conclusion from my first confrontation with her and my unusual behavior tonight.

It seems that her logical thinking ability is really good, and she can easily grasp the key points.

It's just that the question was asked so suddenly, I don't know how to answer her.

After a long silence, I finally spoke, "Can you promise me one thing?" ”

"What's the matter?"

"Don't mention my parents in front of me again!"

"Yes, but can you tell me why?"

I was silent for a while, but finally I spoke.

"My mother has died...... And my father, who left when I was two years old, has never come back after all these years. ”

"I don't have a memory at the time, so I don't know what he looked like. So no matter how bad I am, no one will worry about me. Do you understand? ”

I looked up at her, and laughed to myself.

“……”

"I'm sorry, I didn't expect ......," she said in a somewhat timid tone.

"Needless to say, I'm sorry, that's exactly what happened...... So the first time you said that my parents didn't raise me well, I would lose control of my emotions, because although I didn't have a father, my mother treated me very well...... She has lived a lonely life, she has not enjoyed a good day, and I cannot tolerate being blamed after her death......"

I don't know what's wrong with me, why I suddenly leaked my secretive words so easily, and in front of a woman I least want her to see my weakness.

It seems that alcohol is really not a good thing, it can easily break down people's defenses and make people vulnerable, or is it because people instinctively want to talk?

But why do I feel a sense of relief after release? Could it be that these memories of mine have unconsciously become shackles in my life? Why are there signs of loosening at this moment?

I haven't found the man yet, I haven't asked yet, I haven't got justice for my mother.

Shouldn't I be digging deeper and deeper in my heart? Why do I feel this damn light? …… My heart suddenly throbbed violently, and the alcohol was surging, so that I couldn't help but cover my chest.

Mu Xichun handed a pack of tissues to my head that was hanging down in pain, and it turned out that I was crying in front of her again on the same night.

I didn't take the tissue she handed me and slapped away the uncontrollable damn tears.

The car soon arrived at the Rhine community where I lived, I got out of the car and waved goodbye to Mu Xichun, and saw that Mu Xichun also turned off the car and got out of the car.

"What? I'll take you home, and you won't invite me to go up and sit down? She looked at me with an unpredictable smile on her face.

I hesitated for a moment, I didn't know what medicine she was selling in the gourd, and I was embarrassed to say no, so I pretended to say indifferently: "You can go if you want, it's just that the room of the single dog is very messy, you better be a little mentally prepared!" ”

I wanted her to tell from the tone in my voice that I didn't want her to let her into my house and leave, but apparently she didn't understand what I meant.

Like a mindless child, she looked happy and said, "It's okay, let's go!" "I can't figure out if she's wise or stupid.

I secretly smiled bitterly and walked in front of me, Mu Xichun followed me with a smile as if she had triumphantly, of course I didn't see her smile.

I staggered up a few flights of stairs to the floor where I lived, but before I could reach the door, I was stunned to see some messy things piled up in the hallway of my room.

However, when I saw the pile of things through the dim light of the stairwell, I became angry.

Because I recognized the mess as my belongings, some household items, clothes and suitcases, and a pair of shoes had been thrown out of the way.

It occurred to me what my landlord had told me a week ago, that he had given me a week to pay the rent, and that it was the last day of the deadline, but I had forgotten about it because of the florist's business.

But even so, the landlord shouldn't have done such a ruthless thing, at least he had to wait for me to come back, I thought angrily.

I took out the key and inserted it into the lock hole in a hurry, but it didn't open it for a long time, and after a closer look, I found that the landlord chain had been replaced with a new one.

I took out my phone with trembling hands and tried to reason with the landlord, but what he did was a little too unkind.

But when I took out the phone, I found that the phone had already run out of power and turned off, and I couldn't control my emotions in a fit of anger and threw the phone on the ground.

I stood in front of the door, gasping for breath, a feeling of powerlessness slowly spreading through my body, and staggered down the stairs.

In fact, it's not all the landlord's ruthlessness to blame for this, it's true that I didn't pay the rent on time to get to such a point, even if this phone call goes through, what can I say to give him a few more days? Then I'm too thick-skinned.

I turned around and smiled bitterly and said to Mu Xichun, who was standing aside, "I probably can't invite you in to sit down!" ”

"Did you ask me in the morning to pay my advance just to pay the rent?" Mu Xichun asked tentatively when she saw my scene.

I sat on the stairs in silence and didn't answer her question, but the answer was clearly clear.

"Laugh if you want! Wouldn't you really like to see my jokes? Now you see it? I lowered my head and said indifferently.

"Am I such a person in your eyes? If you tell me the truth, I might agree to your request! Mu Xichun stared at me, and his tone was a little unhappy after being blamed for no reason.

"It doesn't matter, anyway, you've seen my most depressed appearance, what does it matter to me what kind of person you are!"

"......" Mu Xichun wanted to say something, but in the end he was silent, probably thinking that it was a waste of his lips and tongue to say anything to me, an unreasonable person.

"Let's go!" I was silent for a while and I said, still hanging my head in frustration, never looking at her.

"You...... Is there anything I need to do? She said in a hesitant tone.

"No need, save me some face at the end, you go, I'll take care of my affairs myself!"

She said no more, stayed where she was for a moment and turned to go downstairs, lingering for a moment at the first corner of the stairs before finally turning and going downstairs.

The world fell silent again, and I sat on the stairs for a long time, looking at the messy objects in front of me and my heart cooled a little.

I know that the nest where I have lived for two years no longer belongs to me, to be exact, it has never belonged to me, it has only taken me in temporarily, and I have always been just a passer-by under the fence.

Like a lonely soul, he has never been able to find a place to belong, and now he doesn't know where he is going to drift away......

After a long time, I finally got up. From the pile of trivial things in front of me, I simply packed a few clothes and some daily necessities, packed them into suitcases, and went downstairs.

Before going downstairs, I glanced back at the pile of what's left, lying quietly on the ground, like a child waiting to be adopted, but I had no place to stand and no longer be able to take them with me.

Out of the community, standing in the hollow night made me a little helpless, and a straight road in front of me extended its life infinitely on both sides, as if it had been extended to the end of the world.

A gust of wind blew, and a few dead leaves on the side of the road drifted in front of my eyes and landed on the other side of the road. The street lamps are sallow, and a few moths that have broken their cocoons fly around, as if they never get tired.

My heart suddenly swelled up with a kind of loneliness that has never been there, the sea of people is reckless, I am like an ant who has lost its tentacles, in this spring splashing night, I don't know where to go.