Self-affirmation is the foundation of human existence.

When a person begins to doubt and deny himself, he becomes repulsive to himself, to others, and to the world. He will doubt, he will question, he will have distrust of himself, of others, of the world, and distrust is actually the beginning of negation.

Or deny yourself, or deny others, or deny the world.

When negation begins to sprout in the bottom of the heart, people will fall into negative emotions, and naturally quarrels, depression, and various mental illnesses will follow one after another.

The reason why IU was emotionally relapsed during this period was because she had doubts about her self-worth and began to deny herself.

And Lee Seung-woo was preaching and accusing more than affirming IU before, although in his opinion he didn't break up with IU, and he put up with IU's noisy and petty nature, which has proved IU's status in his heart.

This is actually a common problem for most men.

I feel that no matter how sweet words and tender words are, they are just empty words, far less real and powerful than actual actions.

But.

It's just a man's opinion.

Women are sensual, or, more essentially, women are far more self-centered, selfish, and less temperate than men.

They are more in tune with the current state, the current mood.

So.

They want men to affirm them at all times, focus on them, and put them first.

This kind of psychology is called 'emotional', but in essence, it is just more 'selfish'.

So from this point of view, 'love' is actually not a very beautiful word, and it is far less than 'respect' to maintain the relationship between people.

What is love?

It doesn't make much sense to delve deeper into its original intention, but in the current society, the definition in the hearts of many women can actually be equated with 'selfishness'.

What is love in this definition?

Love is to ask the other party to be unconditional, uncomplaining, not to care about gains and losses, life and death, friends, relatives, can not care about any consequences, even if you pay all including life, you can't have the slightest hesitation and regret to give, otherwise, if there is only a trace of can't do it, there is a trace of hesitation and hesitation, that is not enough love, or, not so love.

That's why do some women often ask – if your mother and I fell into the river, who would you save first?

This is actually a manifestation of extreme selfishness and selfishness.

Because the subtext is that I am the number one, and you have to give up everything you have for me, including you, even the mother who gave birth to you.

If you can't, then it proves that you don't 'love' me, at least not enough to 'love' me.

So why do women often talk about 'love', and why do they often instill the concept of 'love' in men...... Human nature is profit-oriented.

It's like men being indoctrinated and given the word 'responsibility'.

What is responsibility?

To put another similar word or meaning is to give without complaint.

Therefore, compared to the word 'love', the word 'respect', this concept is actually more able to maintain the relationship between people.

Because respect is mutual affirmation and mutual giving, not just a one-sided request. …

Confucius said that it is rude to go back and forth without coming.

In fact, the ancients, or Confucianism, have long pointed out how people can interact with each other for a longer time. ——In courtesy, respect, and mutual respect.

This is true between people, and it is also true between men and women.

Lee Seung-woo didn't understand these things before, so in getting along with IU, with Lim Yoon-a, with Park Ji-yeon and others, he was actually more self-oriented and selfish.

Of course.

Now that he understands this, it doesn't mean that he is not selfish or selfish.

He just knows better how to deal with the relationship with IU and others, or how to meet the expectations and needs of IU Lin Yuner and others. - That is to give them the affirmation and respect they want.

Not only in deeds, but also in words.

Less denial and accusation, more affirmation and respect, so that the people around you are happier and you can be more comfortable.

Raising his hands lightly and wiping away the tears on both cheeks of IU, Li Chengyou smiled warmly and said gently: "Why are you crying again, crying at every turn, your face is crying." ”

IU sobbed, grabbed Lee Seungwoo's hand, and said half-coquettishly and half-resentfully: "It's not you who provoked me, if you had told me like this earlier, how could I be angry?" ”

Lee Seung-woo: "......"

Get!

It's my fault again.

Women can never be wrong, only men can be wrong.

But these verbal victories and defeats, rights and wrongs, Lee Seung-woo has already seen it, and he has lost sight of it, and he has no mind to compete with IU for victory or defeat.

With a dumb smile, Li Chengyou nodded calmly: "I did a lot of things wrong before, and I want to apologize to you." I promise to correct it in the future, and I will respect you more and care more about you. Of course, you can't be petty anymore and mess with me at every turn. If I am really wrong and you are justifiably angry, I will sincerely apologize to you and make amends with humility.

But if you're petty......"

"Whoever is petty, it's not all because of you." IU wiped her tears and opened her mouth to refute.

Li Chengyou smiled: "Okay, I admit my mistakes, and I blame them." ”

"I'm to blame you." IU couldn't help but mumble again.

After the words were spoken, he seemed to think of something again, and suddenly asked: "By the way, I almost forgot, you just said that I am neither as smart as Lin Yun'er, nor as high as her emotional intelligence, nor as beautiful as Zhiyan, and not as good as Zhiyan, so why do you like me, what do you like about me?" ”

What do you like? Like you stupid.

Lee Seung-woo secretly smiled, but he wouldn't really answer like that. - Although it is true that IU attracts him, and it is the main reason why he likes IU.

Actually, stupid.

In a derogatory sense, it is stupid and unintelligent; But when you look at it in praise, it is simple and sincere.

Blessings and misfortunes depend on each other, and pros and cons complement each other.

Being smart is a plus, but it's also a disadvantage.

Smart people are often too calculating, too calculating, too calculating. The more things you think about, the less sincerity your heart will have.

Unless it is those who are really smart enough to be enlightened and wise, the smarter they are, the more intelligent they are, the more they will be guarded, the more vigilant they will be, and the more they will not dare to really communicate with each other.

This is like the difference between Lin Yuna and IU.

Lin Yuna is indeed smart and emotionally intelligent, but she is too smart and cares too much about gains and losses, so she has known Lee Seung-woo for more than two years and collaborated on two works, but so far they have not really come together.

And IU is not as beautiful as her, and her IQ and EQ are not as good as her, but she caught up with Lee Seung-woo a long time ago.

Why do men mostly like stupid women?

Plainly.

Human nature is 'selfish', whether it is a man or a woman, they prefer and want each other to give more.

People are self-centered, and this is true for both men and women.

It's just that women are more serious than men.

But although I know it and understand why I like IU, I can't say it so bluntly.

One can be selfish, but not so selfish as to think that others are not selfish, and take it for granted that others should obey themselves, understand themselves, and serve themselves.

The result of thinking like this will only be to get yourself in trouble.

So.

As soon as the thought turned, Lee Seung-woo did not answer directly, but borrowed a famous saying.

"There's one thing I think is good, and we can both encourage each other. - Albert Einstein said: Everyone has talents, but if a fish is judged by its ability to climb a tree, it will think it is stupid for the rest of its life. ”