The world is divided into nine states, and I live in the tenth state, called Taiping Prefecture. Taiping Prefecture and Zhixu State border, the war for many years, the imperial court then divided Taiping Prefecture out of Kyushu, so the historians can write straight: the emperor's grace is vast, the four seas are subdued, and Kyushu is peaceful......

My name is Sha Buqi, male, 17 years old, living in Block B, Unit 2, Qingxu Resort, No. 54, Development Avenue, Mochou Peak Scenic Area, Jiuqu Mountain Range, northern Taiping Prefecture. What I'm going to tell you next is some of the stories that happened in the time and space I lived in. You may have never heard of this plane, just as I know nothing about your world, maybe we are on two planets separated by hundreds of millions of light-years, or maybe we coexist in two parallel universes that are close to each other, or maybe I have traveled from a time ago a long, long time ago...... It doesn't matter, the important thing is that I've been on the pitch and introduced myself. Because before I put pen to paper, I received a kind reminder from many seniors in your world: "The protagonist must be introduced within 300 words at the beginning, this is a routine." "But I'm a slow-burning person.,I like to go step by step.,I really want to introduce the protagonist in the 301st word.,The seniors hate iron and steel:" Less TM pretending to be X, if you kid doesn't follow the rules, the people who read the story will be very unhappy, and we don't welcome you!

In life, there will always be many helpless things, and I was born in Taiping Prefecture, which is a helpless thing. Eighteen years ago, the peerless master Sha Ren and the female shopkeeper Bu Jianxue fell in love one night, which was also a helpless thing. These two things are the relationship between effect and cause.

That night, the martial arts heroes gathered in Zhuang Bilou to compete for the crown of "the most beautiful man in the world", which was even more helpless. Originally, they wanted to compare the "No. 1 Master in the World", but the activity plan was rejected by the Ministry of Rites, because the previous "No. 1 Master in the World" competition was too violent and had a very bad impact. In fact, the process of violence is quite in line with the audience's taste, but the result of violence is a bit troublesome, because as the name suggests, the key to the study of rivers and lakes lies in the word "absolute" - either let the other party cut off their children or let themselves cut off their children and grandchildren first, so countless eunuchs were created, causing strong uneasiness among the official eunuchs.

At the same time, the officials of the Criminal Department and the Military Department were also uneasy, and the reasons for this were rather tortuous. In order to make a name for themselves in the "No. 1 Master in the World" competition, martial arts people use their brains, learn from nature, imitate all things, and new martial arts and sects are constantly emerging. First of all, a martial arts master was inspired by the mouse and developed the unpredictable and powerful "Spirit Mouse Fist", which won several consecutive championships. The good times didn't last long, and soon someone researched the "Divine Cat's Paw", and every move was completed with the "Spirit Mouse Fist", so it was replaced. It didn't take long for the spirit of the "Divine Cat's Paw" to be compared with the "Wild Dog Claw", and the latter was defeated by the more ferocious "Evil Wolf Legs", so one thing descended from one thing, and after many tosses, there were still "lion heads" and "tiger feet" such as "lion heads" and "tiger feet" that were quite indistinguishable from each other, so the "lioness head" and "tigress feet" came into being, and joined hands to dominate the martial arts.

After a while, a new sect appeared on the rivers and lakes, the "Humane League", and the founder was a beggar named Lu Tianci. This man has mediocre martial arts, but he loves to invent and create, and once accidentally lost three fingers in an experiment to study a special razor for female men. Later, he participated in the evaluation of the senior beggar master of the beggar gang, and it stands to reason that he can get nine out of ten hardware advantages such as mutilated limbs and obscenity, but unexpectedly, the elders of the beggar gang canceled his participation on the grounds that he was not doing his job properly and was obsessed with strange tricks and tricks. Lu Tianci broke away from the beggar gang in a fit of rage and set up another portal, and used his skillful hands with only seven fingers to invent many strange secret weapons, such as the "enemy dog oil" that specializes in "wild dog claws", the "mad cow cake" that kills the "wild bull horns" in seconds, and the "search meat crystal" that completely explodes all kinds of beast-shaped martial arts, etc., which are easy to operate and powerful, and quickly change the pattern of martial arts.

The major "beast" sects were wiped out or annexed by the "Humanitarian League", and Wan Wangwang, the once prosperous head of the "wild dog claw", was also chased and killed by the enemy, and fled to the Lingxi Cliff on the Shiluo coast, where the enemy took out a bottle of black "enemy dog oil".

Wan Wangwang looked up to the sky and smiled: Hahaha! Thanks to the old man's cleverness, he secretly renamed the "wild dog claw" of his own sect last night to "wild boar trotters", and your "enemy dog oil" can no longer restrain me.

With that, he roared and used the eighth type of "Wild Boar's Hoof" "Soul Chasing Stomping" (this is a unique trick he realized during a robbery of street vendors), jumped several feet high in the air, bent his legs together, aimed at the opponent's head and stomped down.

The other party gave a faint "oh", unhurriedly opened a small sachet and threw it into the air. Thousands of cold stars flashed, accompanied by a scream, and I saw that Wan Wangwang's whole body was covered with snow-white and crystal "search meat crystals". At this time, he had jumped to the highest point, and before he could fall, the grains of "Flesh Crystal" made a crackling and popping sound, tearing apart Wan Wangwang's skin, and began to suck his flesh and blood like a locust, eroding his bones. In the blink of an eye, they actually squeezed the five big and three thick Wan Wangwang into a dried corpse, as thin as a piece of paper. A gust of mountain wind blew, and the "piece of paper" Wanwangwang hanging in the air was blown up and down, floating to the depths of the cliff, and the "wild dog claw" and "wild boar hoof" were lost.

The development of the situation has made the leaders of the Criminal Department and the Ministry of Military Affairs very unhappy: On the one hand, such disputes have caused chaos in all directions, the pressure on public order on the local government has increased sharply, and the rate of solving cases has plummeted, with the result that the three-year plan set by the Criminal Department has not been realized for nine years; on the other hand, the cheap and high-quality equipment invented by the "Humanitarian League" directly threatens the monopoly position of the Ministry of Military Affairs in the arms market.

In fact, when the "Humanitarian League" was first established, it attracted the attention of the local government, but the eradication of a small ninth-rate gang that had no influence could only be written in the year-end summary, and at most it was worthless verbal commendation, so it was not attractive to the catchers. They decided to raise and fatten this sprout according to the usual practice, and then serve it in a pot, maybe they can make headlines or something with a collective first-class merit. Unexpectedly, the "Humanitarian Alliance" grew fiercely, and by the time they were ready to harvest, they were already powerless.

Judging from the current situation, if the "No. 1 Master in the World" contest is held, the champion must be in the pocket of the "Humane League", therefore, under the triple pressure of the Ministry of Eunuch Punishment and the Ministry of War, the officials of the Department of Ritual and Cleansing Department waved their pens and changed the activity plan of the "No. 1 Master in the World" contest to a beauty pageant, and the problem was solved. This is well thought out, you must know that including Lu Tianci himself, the backbone of the "Humanitarian Alliance" is a group of technical nerds, most of whom are raunchy and highly short-sighted, and if they participate in the beauty pageant, they will be wiped out in the audition.

Regarding the Ministry of Rites' wanton interference, some stunned young people who have just entered the rivers and lakes still have a lot of complaints, thinking that "the affairs of the rivers and lakes, the rivers and lakes", why do we choose the first master in the martial arts, and still ask their government to point fingers?

At this time, the more sensible old rivers and lakes will be kind and seductive: "Fool, the rivers and lakes are all managed by the government, and the rivers and lakes are considered birds?"

The crux of the matter is that whether it is the "first master" or the "first beautiful man", as long as he holds this gold-lettered signboard that has been certified by authority, he will be embraced by glory and wealth, and he can take many detours in life. As a result, many martial arts masters who have been practicing all kinds of magic skills for many years had to temporarily cram, and ran to the Remnant Cliff to find the help of Jin Sanbian, the "Holy Hand Against the Sky".

In today's world, if you want to make a person's parents unrecognizable to him, in addition to making his parents amnesia, finding Jin San's disguise is the best way. Jin Sanbian is gifted and intelligent, has many teachers, and is eclectic, integrating Shennong's herbalism pipe micro-carving and Hua Tuo's bone scraping method into one, creating a unique way of disguise, which can turn decay into magic and turn sows into sables, and even often have customers who can't help but be fascinated by themselves after changing their appearance, drooling at the bronze mirror nymphomaniac, and clamoring to marry themselves.

Jin Sanchang's disguise technique is seamless, except for himself, no second person in the whole world can see through it - this is very fatal, as we all know, people in the rivers and lakes can be shameless in order to save their own lives, and they can also ask for the lives of others in order to protect their faces.

Soon, Jin Sanbian's body was found in the rocky hill under the Remnant Cliff, with one hundred and seventy-three weapons inserted in his body. This incident relieved all those who had been disguised, but it made countless people who had not had time to change their appearance feel more regretful and painful than missing their first love. Medical centers around the country sniffed out business opportunities and launched disguise businesses one after another. In any era, eating with your face is an easy, efficient and environmentally friendly way to get rich, so there are always people who are dissatisfied with their own skin, even if they are slaughtered to the fullest, they also regard the transfiguration master as a reborn parent who can change their fate, but they are willing to be a cow and a horse in the next life. The hungry market demand has attracted many blacksmiths and butchers to join in, and the professional level and safety factor can be imagined, and the result is that people who want to change their faces are often turned into cows and horses, and their vows to be cattle and horses in the next life are fulfilled in advance.

The follow-up problems caused by this are endless, there are often strange things where a person laughs and laughs and loses his chin or falls into the bowl while eating his ears, the most sensational accident occurred when the head of Emei and the Shaolin abbot competed, the two sides fought for several rounds, the Shaolin abbot's tall and handsome hooked nose suddenly disappeared, and then the whole delicate and smooth face also drooped down like boiled maltose, dripping to the ground. The head of Emei thought that this was the effect of being shocked by his deep internal strength, and he struggled to puff up his proud breasts to show his charm under excitement, and the breasts stuffed with filler exploded with a "bang", and the two masters were killed on the spot. >