Think about the fact that it has been more than 4 years since I arrived at BJ in the late autumn of '04. Under a serious illness, I have the mood to see the road I have traveled and the difficulties I have faced.

In fact, it should be said that the snow day still has a lot to do with me, I remember the middle of winter that year, the city in the north of the heavy snow, that was my birth year, life fell into difficulties and difficulties, I remember that there was an evening class arranged at that time, it seems to be Mr. Zhao's data mining, after the class in the face of the vast snow, there is no money in the pocket to take a taxi home.

Our college was built on the mountainside, at that time I had to walk down the slippery stairs step by step, when I was about to reach the gate of the college, I suddenly saw the vast snow, under the dim street lamp, snowflakes falling, my heart did not know what it felt like at that time, people say that men need a family to characterize, facing the first 23 years of life, maybe that moment is the source of my thinking about stability.

Later, he graduated and stayed in school. To be honest, I never thought that I would be associated with the title of teacher, so I began to be busy as a teacher, I have two career ideals in my life, one is a soldier, and the other is a psychiatrist, but so far, and these two professions are passing by.

Strictly speaking, I have not experienced the history of the army, but when my peers were in high school, I tried the reserve military school, and I remember that someone said that if a man has not experienced divorce, the army, and prison, then life is incomplete.

What about my life, is it not complete? Thinking of this serious illness again, when I fainted, the colorful appearance in front of my eyes, the numbness of the body made people feel that it was not their own body, and the heartbeat of 180 beats per minute had begun to lead to myocardial ischemia, and the blood test troponase was seriously high.

In fact, the pressure is not without it, the hardest time may not know whether I can continue to lie in the same bed tomorrow for the next night, and even don't know which city I will go to tomorrow, complicated life, many people are reluctant to look back on their lives, to be honest, I too, there was a long time when I couldn't even face my own life, and I didn't even know whether the decisions I made should be made, whether they made their own decisions.

The memories left during that time are complicated, and I have read some psychology books during this time, saying that the more distant people's memories are, the clearer they are, and they can even be connected into pieces, and the actual life they have lived is not what they remember, and they have added too many elements of their own later imaginations.

Having said so much, there is no beginning, in fact, I feel that I am writing memoirs, originally memoirs are supposed to be written by successful people, but what is success, money is success?

Or has status is success, this society's definition of success is becoming more and more narrow, a person's dull life, manage their own love and family, how is it not a kind of success?

It should be a memoir, and perhaps there are many elements of conception in it, without which life often does not seem so satisfactory.

From the summer of '99....I couldn't write today.,The doctor told you to rest at 11 o'clock every day.,For the sake of your own body.。

I was accustomed to seeing a doctor in a military hospital, but as a result, the surgical advice of Fuwai Hospital, which the director had contacted for me, was not adopted.

Write it, maybe something will be written out and the mood will be better. Chinese medicine practitioner said

"Heart-brain connection" I believe, so recently began to study Chinese medicine and hypnosis, China's ancient culture is broad and profound, Chinese medicine is the essence of the essence of it:) When I was in school, my parents used to have great hopes for me, my academic performance, at that time it seemed that the language was very good, every time I could be more than 120, we had 5 courses at that time, 150 per class.

As a result, my parents were disappointed, I remember that my father sent me to college at that time, and I still remember the heavy rain that day in my mind, and I clearly remember my father's eyes when he saw the broken glass in the school dormitory.

When I saw my dad off, it was morning, he took a taxi, I don't know why, I'm not a boy who loves to shed tears, the green square left me more strength.

Looking at his back, I cried at the time. In today's words, tears, gurgling. My father has been engaged in personnel work since he changed jobs, and most of the children of his comrades-in-arms and colleagues are the same age as me, and the last two of them have been admitted to Tsinghua University and the other to Tianda.

As the only child in the family, that moment was really full of guilt. The college years were muddy and wasteful, and one of them once went to the army's hospital because of emotional problems, which can be regarded as a big innovation.

When I was in college, some of those things I didn't dare to think about before, but now I don't know if it's because of a serious illness or if I'm brave.

Looking back, my heart began to calm down. Let's get back to the topic, the year of graduation. At that time, it was not easy to find a job, and my family gave me two choices, one was to enter the electricity bureau, which seemed to be the title at that time, and the other was to go back to the tax bureau, all because of my family's work.

If I had chosen to do so, I might not have been able to witness many thrilling moments that seemed more thrilling at the time.

But to be honest, I didn't go back, because I didn't want to go back to the small city where I used to live, I felt that my wings had grown stiff, and I felt that computer science was almost good :) Then fly, think of a song, and fly freely.

。。。