Let's talk about the two people who changed the path of my life, in fact, I can't say that I met in this gap, because one of them is already very related, but the connection was cut off later. How to start writing, you have to start writing at Cong University.

When I was a freshman, I used to go to my uncle's school to learn speaking. Our school conditions are indeed limited, and there are no foreign teachers. My uncle asked the English teacher to open a slip, and then I was able to attend the foreign teacher class every Thursday. When I went to class for the first time, the foreign teacher told me to introduce myself, which was in English, of course. My psychological quality is not bad, and after I went up, I introduced myself in English with a strong accent, ^_^ is this an accent outside London? When I told me that I came from another school, the students below were surprised, and of course that's how I felt, because I didn't know if they understood what I was saying. It was only later when I talked to a few of them that they told me that there was no precedent for this before. Well, I'm number one again. When we came down to the podium, the foreign teacher told us to do situational communication, that is, to find a random person and communicate in English, and at this time, she came over. I thought about it for a long time, and I felt that it was better not to write her real name, although she is now in a foreign country, maybe these will not have much impact on her, and there are still many things I didn't know about at that time, since this is the case, then don't write it, change your name. It's called: Yongli. I forgot what we were talking about, anyway, I didn't quite understand what she was saying, and she didn't understand what I was saying. At the end of class, she walked behind me, pulled me, and asked what is your name? Dizzy, dizzy. It seems that my self-introduction on stage did not work at all. Actually, I believe in fate, I believe in the feeling at first sight, I don't have any feelings for Yongli, a very ordinary girl, not tall, white skin, ordinary facial features, not the kind of girl I like.

Later, I went to their school a lot, but I didn't see her very often, except in class. She is older than me, she was already a junior in my freshman year, and in the second semester of my freshman year, although I was not in the mood to listen carefully to the lectures after the incident in the examination room, I was still tireless in learning English, which is one of the reasons why I was able to pass the fourth level exam. This ordinary relationship lasted for half a year, and suddenly one day, she asked me, do you often watch movies. I'm right, it's no wonder that I skip class every day and don't watch movies. Maybe it's because I've watched all the films they talk about. She said when she would take me to see one. It's a bit of a suffrage... I'm not afraid to laugh at everyone's jokes, but as of that time, I haven't seen a movie with a girl alone. Even if there is a girl, it is someone else's girlfriend, and everyone is together. I asked, why? Why, she looked at me in surprise, why? Why? I know why?

Diagonally across from the main entrance of the school was the largest movie theater in the city at the time, and I forgot the name. That Saturday, I went to the movie with her, and we met in front of her school, and she naturally took my arm and my heart started to beat wildly. I'm a person, although I was quite able to tease girls at the time, but in the face of such a situation, I was not prepared at all. When I entered the cinema, I almost fell down several times. In the dark, she asked me, haven't you ever found a girlfriend? I said who said, I have more girlfriends. I heard her laughing, though I couldn't see her face clearly, and I didn't understand why she was like that. I watched it as a night scene, one after another, and then she fell asleep and snuggled up to me. I didn't watch the movie at all, it was about 3 o'clock in the morning, and she said I was sleepy, let's go. I said the dorm doors are closed, where are we going? She said let's take a look and see, which is roughly the line. I don't know if she will see this article in a foreign country, what kind of memories it will bring back to her, I didn't want to write about it, but that would be too abrupt for what happened later, and I'm sorry if you get confused. Walking out of the theater, it was very dark. She said to my house. I know she's from the city, and I said no, your parents are at home. She said that they were not at home, and that my dad had just been transferred to ×× (provincial capital) and that my mom had also gone. I'm almost there, too. I said oh.

I slept on the sofa in the living room that day, and she asked me to sleep in his parents' room, and I felt very awkward and sleepy, so I fell asleep, and by the time I woke up, it was already noon the next day. When Cong counted more than 2 months after she went to the provincial capital, a lot of things happened, so I won't write anymore. It's better not to wake up with some things.

I didn't think we would see each other again, because Cong never had contact again, she didn't call me, and I didn't think about looking for her, which was a strange feeling. Maybe I never thought about what would happen between us in the future, right? I didn't expect that many fates would be decided at that moment. What I didn't expect was that we would meet again on such an occasion.

I didn't expect to be able to write almost 30,000 words, and I remember that the first time I wanted to write a memoir was in a winter in a foreign country. At that time, all I had in my heart was ignorance and worry about the development of things, and I wanted to write down that feeling several times, but unfortunately, I would rather get drunk than leave a little ink on my emotions and thoughts. People are like this, they always tell themselves that they still have time to do it tomorrow, and this can be done tomorrow, but no one has ever thought about whether you can still open your eyes tomorrow, and whether you will still have a chance tomorrow. We are always busy with work and stress as an excuse not to pay attention to the people around us and not to pay attention to our families, but have you ever thought that one day, the person worthy of your care is gone, what kind of feeling is it, pain, despair, but what can be exchanged for it? Those who should go have gone, and those who are not there will never be there, "the son wants to raise but the parent is not there" What a sadness it is. Do what you want to do, there will always be time, as long as you think of a way, as long as you are willing to go in that direction, everything will be fine. Don't wait until you run out of time to look back, it turns out that there are many, many things that you haven't been able to do in this life.

When I saw her again, it was both accidental and inevitable. Because our company has been divided into two aspects: large customers and individual customers at that time, although I no longer take people on business trips, although I no longer face partners, but I am given other responsibilities by the company, that is, responsible for the development of individual customer markets. To put it in layman's terms, it is to talk about some cooperation with major enterprises, and we appear with the concept of financial management to preach some basic knowledge of financial management to their employees. Maybe it's because of this that although I got into a lot of trouble, I wasn't fired directly by the company. At the beginning, there were full-time financial advisors at each information session, but then the stall became bigger, and the manpower could not be mobilized. A lot of the time, it's just me who brings one or two assistants to deal with the situation. Therefore, you must pay attention to the various lectures in the future, because the person who instilled financial management in you may not even have a stock account, just like me at that time. ^_^ At that time, our A-shares were quite sluggish. I remember that it seems to be the autumn of 00, it should be this season, we and a very large company in the province at that time, I don't know what this company does, I know that everything is done, everything is sold, and there is a considerable government background, and the leaders are appointed by the province. In short, I have made it all official business. We got in touch with the company's trade union through some relationships, eating and drinking, staggering, they promised to send emails to employees, and made an appointment to hold a lecture in their company's conference room, at this time people have begun to popularize email communication, more advanced than our hall :) to talk about other topics, I was quite able to drink at that time, basically a pound of liquor, there was not much reaction, and some things were done at the dinner table. That afternoon, we arrived at the company's conference room early as promised, it should have started at two o'clock in the afternoon, we arrived an hour early, I was instructing the assistant to debug the machine, someone tapped me on the shoulder, I turned around, a mature, elegant woman stood behind me, I recognized her at first sight, but I was not sure, because the change was so great, the hairstyle completely changed. Dressed quite professionally, the skin on her face became more and more delicate, "Why, I don't know" she said, "That, how can there be, how can I not know" I was a little incoherent, she said, "I received an email a few days ago, I saw your name, and I am not sure if it is you" Email, what email, I remember, that email was drafted by me and sent by their trade union. Because I wanted to understand the following basic financial situation, and then summarize it and hand it over to our professional consultants to help produce the manuscript, which is more targeted, so I left my name and contact information.

"I wanted to call you and try it, but then there was no surprise" Yes, yes, I don't think it's a surprise, it's a fright. That's when I realized she was in this company, and I said you're over here? She said yes, I'll listen to your lecture later. At this time, a little girl from their union came over, and when she saw her, she called Mr. ×, and you are also here." ×, I'm dizzy. I don't want to write about the details below, some of the memories are vague, anyway, the lecture was about absent-mindedness, and she listened to it all the way to the end, sitting in the first row.

Maybe I've written too much in the past few days, and I'm starting to feel a little unwell, and I've been taking medicine. If there is a recurrence, surgery may be the only option. Take a break, maybe say goodbye for a few days, thank you to the friends who follow my article, your support has given me the motivation to write.

Sitting in the ** club of the capital airport and waiting for the plane, because I want to do a check-up in another city, in fact, Fuwai is already the most authoritative hospital in this area, but my friend made an appointment with a prestigious Chinese medicine doctor, in their words: physical problems do not appear alone, but problems as a whole, and then erupt at one point. This is also the reason why TCM treatments are all multi-target effects. Therefore, if you do not have surgery, you need comprehensive conditioning. In fact, judging from the current treatment theory of traditional Chinese and Western medicine, if the body is a structural lesion, it should not be effective to rely on drug treatment alone, and most people will choose surgery. It's not that I don't want to have surgery, it's that I'm really resistant to surgery, and I'm about to say goodbye to 20 and enter 30, which really makes me unacceptable to have surgery at this age. People always live in contradictions, remembering a sentence in the soldier's assault, life is a problem stacked on top of each other, solved one, and another comes. I think life is like a constant choice, and after choosing again and again, we have come to where we are today. Voluntary, involuntary, obtained, and unacceptable, each choice we make will determine our fate in 5 or 10 years.

Just now the waiter came to ask what to drink, I asked for mineral springs without thinking, since I was sick, quit drinking, also quit all drinks, only drink mineral water, now I like to drink 5100, is XZ, the taste is very good. In fact, people's quality of life is constantly improving, which is why we can live for a few hundred yuan when we just graduate, and at a certain stage, according to the annual salary system, we still feel that the money is not enough to spend. When people reach a certain stage of life, they begin to release their moods and hobbies, such as not liking photography before, but now they like to walk around and shoot everywhere. Because these need material support, I admire such a group of people who live, the theme of life is obvious, such as like adventure, then all the income is invested in it, I would rather live simpler, dress simpler, and pursue the value of my life in the process of each adventure. They are a group of people whose life themes are very concentrated and prominent, and they are very free and easy, but unfortunately I can't do this. Now I want to make my life healthier, so that I can have more time and more opportunities to do what I wanted to do before, but unfortunately I couldn't do :) I just heard a sentence in the big screen LCD, which is the promotional video of the Paralympics: "What I want to surpass is not only my body, but my will." Although I can't see the five-star red flag rising, I can hear the sound of the national anthem."

Security at the airport was particularly strict during this time, and people like me, who had to fly around the sky a lot, had to start adjusting their schedules. In the past, it was OK to arrive at the airport an hour in advance, but now it is not possible, it takes 2 hours, and you have to face multiple security checks in the middle. I remember the last time I got off the plane at the capital airport, I deliberately tested the security reliability of the Olympics :) After landing through the passage into the hall, I saw a camera, and then I deliberately stopped for a while, and then used the stopwatch in the watch to time, I brought the kind of special watch similar to the commando, which is relatively large and has multiple functions. Then look up and walk forward, with a regular pace, and then when it comes to the second camera, time again. I don't know if it's because of the feedback from the camera, or they think I'm suspicious, "Please show me your ID" The tone is more polite, my ID card is in the bag, and there are only passports and Hong Kong and Macao passes in my pocket, so I gave them my passport, "What about your ID card?" "I asked, can't this work?" Please show your ID. "Again, I noticed that the two of them were starting to get serious, so I had to untie my bag, and then I went all the way to the bottom of my wallet, and took out my ID, and one of them took my ID card and turned around and said something to the other side with the hand, probably verifying. Another police uncle asked some questions about where he came from and what he was doing at BJ. ^_^ It feels good, it seems that our Olympic security is in place.

Actually, for a long time, I avoided talking or dealing with the police for many reasons. After so many years of entanglement with the police, there are also many friends in the police world, for a long time, the police and the army are a big part of my life, not to mention these, some things should be buried in the galaxy of memory first, wait, maybe wait until many years later, when you can write it down and can be completely used as a memory.

Just now I heard a report on TV: Shenzhen has reported a temporary residence permit system for 13 years, and the residence permit system has been officially implemented. The good news, although I don't know if there is a deviation in the specific landing, but no matter how in terms of human rights and humanization, our society has made progress, at least there is a sense of progress:) everyone in the same city, are making their own contributions to the development of this city, in fact, no matter what you are doing, as long as you exist in the system of this city, you will be dissolved, you will become a molecule in the development process of this city, a gear, one day if you leave, The city is going to adjust itself to this change. You may think it's an exaggeration, but in fact, you are the builder of the city and the contributor to the city, not whether you are the city's hukou or not. Therefore, friends who are wandering in a foreign land, you should be respected by this city, and you should be treated by the people of this city. You shouldn't be treated differently when your children go to school and buy fixed assets!

It's really the environment that affects everything, I wrote so much, it was caused by the surrounding environment and then wrote down my feelings, the waiter said that you can board the plane :) It's time to go, so it's okay, write less every day, and you can go down, and it's also good for the body. A song comes to mind, 30,000 feet. ：）

The clouds outside the window are very thick, and after level flight, above the clouds, there is another scenery. The little girl sitting next to her, about 18 or 9 years old, looked out the window, very excited, cheering: Marshmallow, it's so beautiful, I want to take a picture. I wore sunglasses and sighed from the bottom of my heart, what a good age, what an enviable youth. My mind goes back to that afternoon many years ago with those 30,000 feet.

After the lecture, she came over and let's have dinner together in the evening. I said okay, there is no reason to refuse, and I have not thought about refusing. I'm waiting for you in the parking lot. Parking, oh. Thinking back to that time now, like a fool. I packed up my things, asked the assistant to take the things back to the company, and then asked the location of the parking lot, and then took the elevator downstairs, there were many cars in the parking lot, at that time I didn't go to study the mood of the car, I didn't know much about the brand of the car, but it was not much understanding, and it also allowed me to see a lot of well-known brands parked here, at least, I knew that the sign of the steering wheel was Mercedes-Benz... At this time, I heard the horn of the car, and she sat in the car and waved to me. It was a Honda, and I didn't have a concept of a car series at that time, so I thought that as long as it was a brand, it should be the same price, and if I later found out how much that car would cost if it was to pay tariffs, I would be surprised and couldn't keep my mouth shut. "What do you want to eat?" She asked, "You're not going to work, leaving so early" "The answer is wrong" She smiled and said "It's okay" It's okay, it's okay to go to work, it's just slipping away, there are too many questions in my heart, but I'm not the kind of person who can't contain my curiosity, frankly speaking, the feeling of strangeness to her at that time is beyond curiosity. "Whatever, you should be familiar with this side, you choose" She didn't speak again, kicked the accelerator, and played the wheel very skillfully. Speechless all the way, I wanted to ask something, but I didn't know where to start, she seemed to want to say something, but she wanted to stop a few times. "Let's go here," she pointed out the window, dizzy, it was a five-star hotel in the provincial capital that had just opened for less than a year, and I had passed by countless times and looked up there. The shape of the folded hands makes many people think of it, and the legend is that a Hong Kong tycoon invested in order to serve his hometown, representing the highest level of the provincial hotel industry. Okay, I haven't been in yet. Just don't let it out. I wanted to make a joke and liven up the atmosphere, but the inside of the car was still dull. She drove the car to the main entrance of the hotel, and a doorman came from the side of the car, through the window, "Mr. ×, hello!" "I fainted again, this is the first time this afternoon, I don't know anymore. She said, go, get out of the car. Then I went to get the handbag in the back row, and I got out of the car mechanically and watched the doorman drive away. She walked up to me and naturally took my arm. It's been a long time...

It can be seen that she is quite familiar with the place and the place is quite familiar with her, from the moment she walked into the lobby, there was always a very capable manager in front of her, and the service staff greeted her politely all the way. I remember eating Western food, and the name of the Western restaurant seems to be "Moulin Rouge", maybe I remember confused. I forgot what I ate that day, because it wasn't important, I just knew that I drank a lot of wine, talked a lot, and knew that her last year of college internship was in this company, and the owner of the company was his father's former comrade-in-arms, and now he is in charge of the company's marketing planning. I was like, what the hell are you doing? She was a little drunk and confused, and said what you want, we can sell it. I said at the time, "Can you get me a gun?" Totally a joke, she smiled and said okay, no problem. Speaking from the heart, I didn't take it seriously at the time, and when I drank to that extent, who could take this seriously? I don't have an idea of how long we talked about it, but I just felt that she wasn't happy, and I felt that there were many things in her heart that were suppressed. Is this still Yongli three years ago?

When she went to the bathroom, I asked the waiter to take the bill, the waiter's bill made me in a cold sweat at the time, a little bit of alcohol was gone, I remember it was more than 1500, at that time it was not as convenient as now, swiping the card was so convenient, and the cash on the body was estimated to be able to pay a fraction, how could it be so expensive, I took a closer look, a bottle of wine was more than 800, I was a little overwhelmed, this is the first time I didn't know how many times I didn't know what to do that afternoon. I asked the waiter, can I use a credit card here? He said yes.

Just then she came back, "What are you doing?" She looked angry and didn't wait for me to answer. She threw a tantrum at the waiter, and I was dazed and didn't understand what was going on. I've known her, I've been with her for a few months, and I've never seen her like this. Later, I realized that she had already signed the bill, and the waiter thought I just wanted to verify the slip again, so he gave it to me. When she came to see it, she thought I was going to pay. It's just such a simple misunderstanding, the waiter apologizes repeatedly, and you ignore it.

Yongli, maybe you will see this article on the Internet, in fact, I don't want to reproduce the scene of the year, I just want to tell you, see you again, you have really changed, the girl who was polite and soft-spoken in the past is no longer there in the past three years. I have always felt that it is not easy for people to live in this society, there is no need to be difficult with others, for you, your words at that time may change the trajectory of that young man's life. Maybe it was just because of alcohol at the time, but later I realized how easy it is for a person to change.

The flight attendant said that the plane was going down, and I was going to put away the computer too. I felt that my fingers were getting weaker and weaker on the keyboard, I didn't know if I was right or wrong to write that, yes, I used to complain, even hate, I thought, if I don't meet you again, maybe my life path will be very dull, maybe it will be quiet, but there will be no ups and downs later, there will be no family members who dare not answer any calls, there will be no my mother who has lost my news of me for many days and cried her face, and she can't cry when she receives my calls.

But Yongli, please believe, there is no more hate now, really, no more. That hatred I have carried for many years, I feel that I am stepping into a trap step by step, in fact, under the serious illness, looking back, it is not a trap, it is because I have too much desire for the so-called success in my heart, and I yearn for the so-called vanity, so I can't complain about others, that twisted soul, I am reborn from the fire, I only hope that my distorted soul in the past can rest in heaven.

The road always has to be walked, and the memories still have to be written, since you have thought about giving yourself a complete memory, a complete journey, then continue to write. Since that meal, we have seen each other more and more often, and each time it will be a café, a tea house, a health club, or something, until one afternoon about a month later. "Are you free at night?" She called me. "When did you ask me out of time?" During those days, the strangeness was reduced a lot, and there was more tacit understanding between the two. Her temper is still the same, although she can feel that I am annoyed by this temper, but the country is easy to change, and her nature is difficult to change. But I always feel that there is a kind essence hidden under her flamboyant appearance, because I don't believe that a person can change so much in three years, and I have met again for more than a month, as I become more and more familiar, sometimes I will ask some about her recent situation in the chat, such as feelings, life, and environment, but every time she is flickering, and never answers my questions positively. Later, I didn't want to ask again, we are friends, not lovers. Or, from realizing that at the end of the day, we have never said a word of love or dislove to each other, and we have approached each other in ways that go far beyond our peers. 22 years old, what a flower-like age, the age of daring to love and hate, and we have never chattered like many young people because of various issues, now looking back, at that time she felt as if she was living a day as a life, not asking the result, not asking if there is a future, like a wild dance in front of the phoenix nirvana. It is said that when people are most emotional, what they say is what they say in their hearts, I looked at the words written on the plane, and my heart undoubtedly still can't calm down, the Buddha said: Let go. Some things are born from the heart, can only be resolved by the heart, it is too difficult to let go, in fact, that memory has been precipitated in the bottom of the heart for many years, if it is not for this time to touch, to feel, it is difficult for me to recall in detail all kinds of things at that time, there is a knot in the bottom of the heart, open this knot, you will find that the memory comes from a steady stream. But it's okay, the last time I knew her news, I knew that she was doing well, she had a happy family, and she had her own BABY, how to say it? I was very relieved to know it at the time, very relieved.