Author: Tang Tang (Le Yun)

"Ruilong Yin: Feelings"

Hengfen Road. The shadow of the blue fog is with the waves, and the sky is wide and the trees are low.

The river is like a light dust, fragrant, and sparkling.

Hesitate. Because of the weakness and sadness, the chime wears through the court.

The color of the cup and the sorrow, the truth does not change, and the words are vine.

In front of the book window, I dreamed, smiled, and danced when singing.

Only those who are idle, the voice is the same.

Spread the paper and pick up the pen, still remember the heartfelt sentences.

In the smoke night, the cone was unintentional, and he stopped frantically.

Even if the end of the world goes. Turning his head, it was desolate and chaotic.

Sigh a thousand wisps. It's far away, and I'm thinking about listening to the rain.

The ileum is nine curves, and tears are like fluttering.

——Tang Tang (Le Yun)

Everyone wants a better life, and few people want to be a better version of themselves. Actually, I know everything, I just want to prepare myself. I did everything I could, but I didn't get to my satisfaction. It's so contradictory, then don't try, give up.

Yesterday I was too tired, when Xue Jie was busy with the enrollment of her aunt's dance studio and dragged her tired body back home, Xue Jie was so tired that she lay on the sofa and didn't want to move, Xue Jie felt that her two legs were about to break, and it was very difficult to even squat. Xue Jie didn't think about it, so she sent a message to depression to complain. After getting off work depressed, I was distressed when I saw Xue Jie so miserable, and I called Xue Jie to comfort her, and we chatted for more than an hour.

"Morning, Bao'er." When it was almost nine o'clock the next morning, I sent a message to Xue Jie, "I'll go, thinking that today is Valentine's Day, I wrote a word for you just now, and I will look at next month, haha." ”

"I want you to come early. Early, handsome. When Xue Jie talked to depression on the phone last night, she kept asking when depression would come, and then when she looked at the calendar with depression, she suddenly saw that the calendar showed a "Qiqi", Xue Jie mistakenly thought it was Tanabata, and happily called depression and cloudy days to come to Sichuan. Depression has already booked a ticket, so I'll fill in the first word for you on a cloudy day. If it weren't for depression today, Xue Jie wouldn't know that this Qiqi was not Qixi Festival. Haha, it's a shame, this is the end of never being in love, it feels like every day is Tanabata.

"It's coming soon, it's coming in a few days." Depressed and happy replied to Xue Jie, "I just brushed Xiu'en love to death quickly, I think we should keep a low profile." How happy you were at the beginning, how miserable the result was, my dear, love is a trickle. ”

"I'll rely on you anyway." Xue Jie's next sentence will never change, and she sent a message again in depression, "The two of us walk a little slower, and we can see a lot of scenery, I don't sprinkle dog food anymore." ”

Xue Jie changed what she had just written that would never be changed and replaced, "Okay." ”

I often get drenched in the rain because I haven't met it yet, and I'm willing to take care of my umbrella. Just like walking in the rain, some people learn to buy sturdy umbrellas, and some people learn not to go out on rainy days. I'm the one who chooses not to go out again on a rainy day. My mind is too delicate, and my mind changes too quickly. Many times, even if someone only says a few words lightly, I can clearly understand all the meanings of his words. I often feel cold, but I've always kept my mouth shut. Like and love can't be compromised; Love and love can't be hidden. By generously acknowledging my relationship with you, I am telling the world that I am yours. If this sincerity is not reciprocated, I would like to be silent from now on, and no longer have illusions about love.

After more than ten minutes, Xue Jie sent a message to depressed, "In the future, I won't write anymore." ”

Yes, I don't want to write anymore, and I don't think it's interesting to do this when you think it's pointless. Thirteen lines of incense, I don't want it anymore; A million-word novel, I don't want to break through. In the future, we will write about flowers, grass, sky, life, trees, birds, towering mountains, and magnificent sea ......, but we should not write about each other.

"No, it's not, Bao'er," depressed hurriedly sent a message, "what do you think, you're angry again?" ”

"Poetry, if you don't want to write it, don't write it, just do what you say." Xue Jie said straight to the point, "What I was forced to write is not what I want." ”

"No, baby, it's love." Depression explained, "There should be something or something, but it should be in line with your own heart." Fool, I was wrong when I saw that you were unhappy. ”

"I now have more than 4,000 fans of novels." Xue Jie didn't answer positively and was depressed, "But I don't want to write anymore." ”

"Honey, are you unhappy? I was wrong, dear, and should not have said such a thing to you. "Depressed and worried about affecting Xue Jie's mood, after all, today is another day for Xue Jie, and she has to help her aunt enroll.

"It's fine." After Xue Jie returned to depression, she pressed the switch button on her phone and turned off her phone.

I don't dare to say that a girl's "nothing" is something, but my "okay" today is indeed "something". I can't express the desolation in my heart, the feeling is like someone bringing a basin of cold water filled with ice and pouring it on my head, making me shiver from head to toe. I want to go to the beach to get drenched in the rain, but the rain in my heart has become a house.

Dancing, explaining, handing out leaflets, handing out cards, demonstrating to strangers, teaching strangers simple dance moves..., Xue Jie keeps herself busy like a spinning top. Only when she gets busy will Xue Jie not think of the rain in her heart. Who can make me willing to stay in the rain without regrets? Rather than being blessed with an umbrella that doesn't love me so much, I'm more willing to get in the rain and be willing to catch a cold.

After lunch, Xue Jie silently turned on her mobile phone and saw that she had sent a message to herself at 9:52, "Well, how hot is your temperature?" ”

Xue Jie did not reply. You are a teenager looking at the sea and don't wear a raincoat. Originally, I had an umbrella that was willing to shelter me from the wind and rain, and I took good care of him to prevent him from getting hurt, but this morning's heavy rain was given to me by the umbrella.

Well, I'm not so reluctant to wear long jeans in the summer because I haven't met shorts that I can wear with yet. I want to endure the gnawing of the long night of loneliness, and I don't want to laugh against my will. A lot of people are doing the same, and they're all capitulating and insisting on jumping back and forth. Later, some chose to persevere, and some chose to surrender. Speaking of surrender, why not want to win? It's because persistence doesn't necessarily lead to victory.

After lunch, Xue Jie stared out the window in a daze. After pondering for a long time, Xue Jie took out her mobile phone and made a final summary of her novel: All fans who love Xue Jie's novels, I'm sorry, the novel has been interrupted again. Thank you all for your continued support and encouragement! No matter how good the experience is, it will be a thing of the past, and no matter how deep the sorrow, it will fall on yesterday, just as the passage of time is merciless. Life is like a healing process, we get hurt, we heal, we get hurt again, we heal again. Every healing seems to be for the next injury. Maybe you have to despair once again before you can live again.

I have long seen the power of living life, the light that embraces death happily, and dispels all the gloom of the past. If everything before was gray, then the splendor that has been silent for a long time at this moment illuminates the whole of my life. Yes, my absence is meaningless, and death has become my noblest delusion. Maybe at that time, the world really stopped being noisy and fell asleep like a baby. And I could watch quietly and smile.

I didn't feel hopeless, I didn't feel hope, and I told myself not to plan for the future with the current mood. After reading "Alive" seven or eight times, I understand a little bit of the meaning of life, I think of a sentence that Jian Yuan said, "The morality of life is better than the world's Huadwelling", when we can abandon bad sorrow and take all pain as the strength or stone for our own progress, we will be able to find our true self and live a real life.

Maybe you can try to enjoy the solitude. If you don't have anyone to accompany you for the time being, it's also a good choice to be friends with books. If you can make a cocoon and bind yourself, you can turn a cocoon into a butterfly. The thousand words surging in the wide silence are many humble lives, telling themselves. Full of hope but not knowing what hope is, expecting too much from life, but not being able to tell what you are looking forward to, or even what you want. When a star falls, it can't dim the starry sky, and I want to be the falling star, and I will be lonely into the sea from now on.

People live as if they are living in a fog, and nothingness is the master here. All his life is to fight against nothingness. You may live in the fog, but everything you do, whatever you think is meaningful, will become a sword of rebellion. Raising this sword and singing about freedom is all you can do.

May you not be crushed by nothingness, not confused by weakness, and may you be able to smile with relief when you look back on your life, as if you were seeing the stars.

Good bye!