Let's talk about the second thing. This matter is closely related to Buli.

As another year passed and the years grew, my mother became more anxious about the marriage that seemed to be a long way off.

Bu Li observed his words and looks, and was naturally very careful at home, and even put down his figure and rarely accompanied his mother to the blind date corner in People's Square several times.

The mother has been a frequent visitor to the blind date corner for several years, not only know many old parents who come here to blind date for their children, but also know a lot about people from some marriage agencies.

It's just that I don't know if I don't go, and I'm really shocked when I go. I went a lot, and to sum up, Bu Li was particularly impressed by the real situation of the blind date corner.

First, there is a serious imbalance in the ratio of men and women in Shanghai's blind date market.

"I'll tell you the truth, it's a men's market now, and there are 5 to 10 people to grab a boy." However, for particularly excellent girls, some matchmakers in matchmaking companies often "endure the pain of cutting love" and refuse to accept them. Some matchmakers even set a strange "rule": girls who have been divorced or whose monthly salary exceeds 10,000 yuan will not be accepted.

Their reasoning is that "a girl's time is precious. You leave it to me, full of hope that I will help you get the match. But if I can't, then your precious time will be wasted. Three months, half a year delayed, and time passed. Simply ruthless, let you go elsewhere to refuel. ”

"We have a handful of excellent girls here, and the best ones have an annual salary of more than a million. There is a girl who works in a large group with an annual salary of 1.2 million yuan and graduated from a prestigious school, but the boys here generally earn a monthly salary of several thousand yuan, about 10,000 yuan, how do you say this match? Different consumption views and different interpersonal circles will eventually cause differences in understanding! ”

Secondly, in the blind date circle here, there are not too many leftover women over the age of 35, and the conditions are really much better than those leftover men hanging on the sign.

It can be seen from the information that most of the leftover women are returnees, highly educated, beautiful, rich, highly intelligent, and have good jobs. And those leftover men of the same age can't stand it, junior college, under 170, fat and ugly, poor, and even without an independent marriage room.

The third impression is that the forest is big, and there are really all kinds of mothers-in-law.

Whether it is from the information or from the conversation, it can be clearly concluded that the "mother-in-law" here attaches great importance to the hard conditions of the man, including economic conditions, and many aunts are "housing control", "income control", "education control", and they are surprisingly consistent in preferring young men with Shanghai hukou.

Selling phase control: In addition to physical fitness and appearance, some mothers-in-law will hope that the height of the hairy foot son-in-law is not less than 175 cm, and it is even better not to wear glasses. This is a typical "selling phase control" and often becomes the first barrier for many young men.

Material Control: Do you have a house? Do you have a loan? Is the house in Central? Do you have a car? Audi or BMW? Do you have a monthly income of more than $50,000?

Although it is a fact that the cost of living in Shanghai is high, and it is understandable to find a stable support for her daughter, some mothers-in-law's too straightforward expressions still make many potential hairy feet sons-in-law unbearable.

Local control: In addition to appearance and materiality, many Shanghai mothers-in-law have a strong sense of locality, and most local boys can be valued. But Bu Li has seen many times that her mother-in-law has condescendingly scrutinized and questioned men from other places. "House control", "education control", "height control", etc., and so on, "material requirements are very high, money worship or materialization is becoming more and more serious, and boys are required to have a house and a car unambiguously."

In fact, if the two conditions are matched according to the information, the conditions are often matched, but the people are not matched; People are worthy, but conditions are not worthy...... It seems that it will never be right.

The mother-in-law looks at her son-in-law, and the more she looks at it, the more picky she becomes?! This made Bu Lidu feel more tolerant of these mothers.

Marriage requires a certain economic foundation. But there is no doubt that the basis of modern marriage is the affection of both men and women, but in today's society, the material basis of marriage is emphasized as never before.

But Bu Li always can't help but think, it is true that marriages without material foundation are often not happy, just like Lu Xun's Juan Sheng and Zijun. But what is the probability of happiness in a marriage that attaches too much importance to material things and ignores the feelings of both men and women?

The last point comes from the mother's re-understanding of the matchmaking when she took the cloth to register the information.

In the process of matchmaking, the most common sentence of the matchmaker is: "The most important thing is to pick someone, and you must be able to live." Marriage is about giving to each other, not taking from each other. If you ask for each other, it's like withdrawing bank deposits, and the relationship will be empty one day. ”

They often cite many relevant examples.

For example, in a successful match, the conditions of the girls are quite good, there is a three-bedroom and one-hall dowry room, when I met the boys, the other party's monthly salary was only 1,500 yuan, but after the college upgrade, after studying for on-the-job graduate school, the annual salary is now 300,000 yuan. Married for many years, the couple has always been harmonious and respectful of each other.

There have also been cases of failure. A "three-high" girl who works in the financial industry married a boy whose conditions were not as good as her, and a year later, the other party had a new love, and the two parted ways.

However, the most impressive thing about Bu Li still comes from the "rumors" that those marriage staff persuaded hard:

------, opportunities are for those who are prepared. If you don't look for it, there is no hope in this life. Many people say that they have no opportunity and no fate, which is not true, if you don't look for it, you can only become a leftover dish in the end. The truth is hard to hear, but it's the truth.

------, you have to find the right signs, find someone who can treat you as a treasure, and find someone who is self-motivated.

------,Every man wants to find a young and tender girl, and I don't know what man likes an old woman in her 30s!

------, some leftover women are also in their 30s, why don't they understand such an obvious truth, are they still living in their dreams?

-----,Even if you are very good, it is an indisputable fact that age is there. If you are over 35 years old, you can only be regarded as a suburban house, and you must be respected as "Monkey King".