After that, Jin'er smiled sarcastically again, "Didn't you say that I can do whatever I want?" Didn't you promise that as long as you can afford it, I can ask for anything? ”

At this moment, Jin'er is becoming more and more unfamiliar, "My aunt used to say that as long as the great cause is successful, she will allow me to stay with my cousin, keep me food and clothing, and give me glory and wealth." So now...... I don't want that status, I don't want the so-called glory and wealth, I just ask my cousin to give me a child, it shouldn't be too much. ”

"You're crazy!" This is the first time I don't know how to respond to Jin'er's topic, because what she thinks is so ridiculous at this moment.

"I'm not crazy...... I just don't want to kid myself anymore. Jin'er gritted her teeth and responded word by word, "Since I know your intentions, I can no longer live with illusions!" ”

After that, Jin'er told me the words she had buried in her heart for many years, "Cousin, in fact, you are not stupid. In the past ten years, you know my mind better than anyone else, but I haven't opened my mouth to tell you, so you will assume that you don't know. ”

"Jin'er" I stood up on the table, trying to interrupt Jin'er's words, "It's not early, let's rest." ”

But who knows, the quiet and understanding Jin'er in the past grabbed my wrist at this time, and refused to let me go, "What are you afraid of?" You have even done such a ridiculous thing as falling in love with Murong Yuqing, are you still afraid of hearing my heart? ”

"Let it go."

"I don't!" Jin'er glared at me, her eyes unwavering, "Today, you have to listen to my heart no matter what is in your heart before leaving." Otherwise I'm afraid...... I'm afraid there will never be a chance again. ”

I looked at the tears in Jin'er's eyes again, and I was a little helpless.

I used to think that she was too sensible and gentle, and I once fantasized about how she would be if she was willful. Unexpectedly, now she is rarely willful, but I can't resist it.

"We haven't done great things yet, and we still have a long way to go." I closed my eyes, and for the first time I felt that the pressure given to me by Jingren Palace was no less than that of Cining Palace, "Jin'er, rest earlier today." We still have a long way to go, and there will be opportunities to tell you what is in my heart in the future. ”

"No......" Jin'er smiled at me with tears on her face and shook her head, "Qianqiu Baye, it's yours." The road is yours too. These things...... It won't matter to me anymore. All I have is this opportunity tonight, if you can understand it, and that's another matter. If not, the relationship between us will end there. ”

"Jin'er!" I let out a low growl.

"I love you, I've loved you since I was a child." Ignoring the anger in my words, Jin'er said to herself, "Since the first time I knew that I had you as a cousin, I have been hopelessly dependent on you. You have a full stomach of learning, and you have everything that a humble gentleman should have.

You will nervously lift me up when I accidentally fell to the ground, and you will praise me for my cleverness in the mouths of 10,000 women who are not talented and virtuous. You're going to spend all your time with me and teach me to read and write......"

"Jin'er, that's just a love for childhood friends, and it has nothing to do with men and women."

Everyone said I was a murderous demon and a ruthless man. But at the end of the day, I'm still a flesh and blood person. It's just that...... Because of his experience since childhood, he is a little colder than ordinary people.

If I say that in this world, I want to have people who do not want to be disappointed. Then the most unbearable thing for me to hurt is this cousin.

It's not just because of her dependence on me as a child, and it's not just because of appreciating her intelligence. What's more, she has been paying for me and my mother all her life.

Regardless of how she was rescued by her mother after her uncle's accident, she was sent to An's home. I'm sure that even if she was really affected by the queen mother's mother and left out. Or be taken in by ordinary people, or fall into the land of fireworks. Each ending may be stronger for her than it is now.

So, I moved my face away, and I couldn't bear to look at Jin'er's expression anymore. He just sighed and interrupted her.

But who knows, Jin'er cried and shook her head, "Once upon a time, I had the same idea as you. At that time, I was sent to An's house by my aunt, and you had already had an accident. The two of us can't see each other as often as we used to...... So...... I've always missed you.

I used to be young, and I didn't know what feelings were. I thought that the reason why I wrote a large number of beautiful words every day and carefully treasured them, and then looked forward to meeting you, was because I didn't want to lose a childhood friend.

But later, when you and I grew up, I realized that my feelings for you were not so simple at all. So much so that when my aunt found me and asked me if I would like to enter the prince's mansion as a concubine for you, I nodded and agreed without even thinking about it. ”

Jin'er's words, every sentence can be sung and cried: "As long as it is for you, even if I am asked to serve other men, so that I can only live in secret for the rest of my life, I am willing!" I entered the Prince's Mansion and spent all day fighting with those side concubines. Later, when the emperor ascended the throne, I became Concubine Hua again. The harem is also much larger than the previous backyard of the Prince's Mansion...... Women, too, began to be more.

I am still hiding in the dark, and on the bright side I am a virtuous woman who does not fight and does not fight. But in fact, it was a femme fatale who had done all the bad things. Every time my aunt came to me, she told me that you were in the barracks, and you lived a life of licking knives.

But I'm in the harem, is it easy? In addition to protecting myself every day, I also have to build up my power and plan for the great cause. But I'm willing...... What's the solution! You are the man I admire, the man I can never stop falling in love with. As long as it's for you, I can do whatever you want!

In fact, every time you have come to see me over the years, you have been able to see my joy in your eyes. You know my heart for you, it's not just that my cousin likes my cousin. It is a kind of companionship that you want to be tired of being by your side for the rest of your life, and it is a love that wants to be your own child.

But...... You see everything in your eyes, but you never take it to heart. Every time you look into my obsessive eyes on you, you always vaguely promise me something. You take advantage of my feelings for you, and the extravagant desire I want to be by your side, to make me work hard for you in the harem.

Actually, I know all of this, but I never want to say it. First, I firmly believe that you will understand my mind. You have been more expensive than others since you were a child, and it is impossible for you to fall in love with other women easily. I have paid so much for you, and I am your most distressed sister since childhood, if one day you need a woman by your side, I am the best choice.

Secondly...... It's because I'm not clean anymore. Although becoming the emperor's woman is for your great cause, in my heart, I am no longer worthy of you. That's why I've never dared to tell you what I mean...... I've never been afraid to ......."

"Jin'er" Listening to Jin'er's words, my heart was full of helplessness, "I won't mention the past......"

"I beg you, let me finish." Jin'er's tone became more and more pleading, "Over the years, it's because I haven't been able to tell you what is in my heart, so I have watched you be tempted by Qing'er." Right now...... I never want to miss anything again. ”

After that, Jin'er said again, "Cousin, I always know that you are very picky, and I also know that you will fall in love with someone else one day." That person could not be me...... But why is it Qing'er? Although she is fine...... But why, it's her. ”

Jin'er is a very sensitive woman, and she trusts her instincts very much. She has recognized that I am attracted to Qing'er, even if I tell 10,000 thousand lies, she will not believe it.

So, I had to generously admit, "I don't know why it's her...... If I could, I would prefer that my heart would not be moved by anyone. But love is coming, and I can't refuse. ”

"Does she know what you want?" Jin'er saw that I finally relented and asked again.

"Yes."

How could she not know? How many times have I shown my love to her, she is not blind, let alone deaf.

"She doesn't love you." After Jin'er got my answer, she said decisively, "If she loves you, how could she choose to re-enter Kunning Palace." ”

"......" faced with Jin'er's words, I don't know how to respond. only felt that her mind was seen clearly, and together with her own dignity, she could feel it clearly.

"Cousin" After a long silence, Jin'er finally mustered up the courage to speak to me again, "It's been so many years, it's the first time you've been in Jingren Palace for so long, and you've listened to me say so many confidant words. I...... It's really fun.

You don't know, I like you and I love you for how long I've been holding back the words in my heart. Now that I've finally said it, I feel a lot more relaxed. ”

...... "I only feel sorry for Jin'er, but I don't have love."

So, I couldn't answer her words.

It's just that for Jin'er, there is no difference between me speaking and not speaking. Because what she wants to say has already been said, and what she wants to ask, she will always take this opportunity to ask.

"Cousin" After another long silence, Jin'er bit her lip and asked me, "If one day the only woman who accompanies you is me and Qing'er is left, who will you choose?"

It is for the sake of commitment, choose me who has always paid for you. will still choose the Qing'er who makes you rare to be tempted for the sake of the love in your heart. ”

Hearing this, I raised my head and looked at Jin'er deeply, and moved my mouth, but I never made a sound.

I know that the queen mother is unwilling to give up Jin'er. The reason why she asked me to come to Jin'er was to persuade me. If I want everything to go in the direction of the queen mother, then on this issue, I can only tell Jin'er that I choose her.

Even if this answer is against my will, even if it is a deception, as long as Jin'er is happy to hear it, she will continue to work hard for me. She will eradicate the child in Concubine Zhuang's womb for me, and even do it to the third prince, the fourth prince and others for me.

All she wanted was a promise I made in person, and before she and Qing'er, I told her clearly that I would choose her. And not like in previous years...... Vague.

However, I could not blurt out these words.

If she had compared it to another woman instead of Qing'er, perhaps the choice would have been very easy for me. But I can't step this hurdle in my heart.

I know it's a fatal heel for someone who wants to achieve great things. But who knows why my heart is not controlled by myself......

Jin'er saw that I hadn't answered her question for a long time, and finally sighed, "Actually, when I asked this question, I knew that I was humiliating myself. But I'm not reconciled, even if I want to gamble the last dignity, I must get an answer. ”

After that, Jin'er smiled bitterly and said, "Cousin, you don't want to choose me." But I still want to tell you...... It's impossible for you and Qing'er! She...... She ......"

"She's going to fall in love with me" I listened to Jin'er's words, and finally said ruthlessly, "I've been with her for four years, she's neither deaf nor blind, and one day she'll understand my mind." ”

I didn't want Jin'er to be sad and sad, and I felt that if I could delay it for a day, it would be a day. First, it's because I really feel sorry for her, and secondly, I have selfish intentions and want to continue to use her. I've always felt that time is the best medicine. As long as we can get through, many problems will be solved.

But now that Jin'er already knows my mind and understands my choice, it's not too much to say some ruthless words to her.

"I've been by your side for more than ten years and have done so many things for you, don't you understand my intentions? Or is it ...... You're blind, you're deaf! Jin'er sneered, shook her head and said bluntly, "I'm so good to you, you can't fall in love with me." Why do you think that these short four years of companionship can make Qing'er fall in love with you?

Cousin, in fact, over the years, even if I have suffered many grievances and done many bad things, I have no regrets. It wasn't until I found out that you were in love with Qing'er that I gradually began to get disheartened. You can love someone, anyone, even a little palace maid. I prefer her...... No way! Your relationship with her is too delicate, and falling in love with her can be a disaster for you and her. You'll all ...... You'll regret it. ”

I don't understand what Jin'er means by disaster, but I never think that I will regret falling in love with Qing'er.

If a planner falls in love with his own pawn, it will cause the whole event to deviate from the direction it should be. Well, I think!

"Jin'er" I sighed helplessly, "I have seen what you have done for me for so many years, you can rest assured, I promised that what you promised will be given to you." Even if I can't regain the throne, I can't walk back to the Forbidden City openly. I will also try my best to keep you safe, so that you can have no worries about food and clothing, and live a prosperous life. ”

"Who is scarce and has no worries about food and clothing, and who wants prosperity and wealth?" Jin'er's two lines of tears are like spring water, no matter what, she can't stop "What I want is just to be by your side." If not, then give me a child.

You didn't listen to my advice, and you fell in love with Qing'er all your way. Would it be nice to keep me a baby? At least later...... In every cold night, there are still your flesh and blood by my side to accompany me......"