In our work, the purpose of our initiative to ask questions is to elicit topics so that we can communicate with each other, obtain information, and change our own wooden image. The ability to ask questions in an appropriate way is the key to getting a perfect answer. Therefore, the following aspects should be paid attention to when asking questions.

●Give the impression of sincerity and modesty

When we speak, we should give people the impression of sincerity, humility and trustworthiness, and form a sense of honesty and trust, so as to have a sense of peace and calm with the answerer, so as to achieve the desired goal. However, the questioning, censorship, and continuous questioning are not very polite, which makes the answerer have psychological resistance and is not conducive to communication. For example: "What do you think about this issue?" This kind of question is a routine question that lacks emotion, and it does not necessarily get the other person's true thoughts. For example, "I would like to hear your opinion on this issue." Such a question appears sincere and modest, and the other party is willing to answer.

●Appropriate language when asking questions

For example, ask, "Has this red sausage gone bad?" The salesperson will definitely be full of unhappiness: "Don't buy it if you're afraid of spoilage." If you change the way you ask, "When did this red sausage arrive?" The salesperson will enthusiastically tell you, "It's just arrived, you see the production date is here." In addition, when asking questions, you should be aware of your role, see the occasion clearly, distinguish the object, and adapt to the psychology of the other party. The so-called role consciousness means that the questioner governs his speech behavior according to the speech behavior pattern prescribed by the language group. What kind of social role you are, what kind of character you are, what kind of character you express, and asking questions should be in line with your own role norms. A middle school student once asked Mr. Ye Shengtao, a leading figure in the language world, "How old are you this year?" Although this kind of question uses polite words, it is very inappropriate, because it does not fit the role of a middle school student asking Ye Lao, but like an adult asking a child.

●Do not impose or leave no room for error

For example: "Why did you come up with such a proposal?" "What else do you think?"

The first sentence is very oppressive, and the other party doesn't know whether his plan is right or wrong, so he doesn't know how to answer. The second sentence is ostensibly a modest question, but who would dare to answer it? Who can be sure that their opinions are superior? In the language art of questioning, it is much better to first change the content of the question into a declarative sentence, and then attach some interrogative affixes to the declarative sentence. Take a look at the following example:

A: "You need a truck?" We have. ”

B: "How much tonnage?" ”

A: "Four tons." ”

B: "We want two tons." ”

A: "What's so bad about a four-ton one?" Isn't it suitable in case there are too many goods? ”

B: "We have to settle the economic account, too!" Well, we'll let you know later......"

It seems that such a conversation failed. Try again if you change the way you ask questions.

A: "What is the average weight of your shipments?" ”

B: "It's hard to say, it's about two tons." ”

A: "Sometimes it's more, sometimes it's less, right?" ”

B: "Yes. ”

A: "What type of truck you need, on the one hand, depends on what kind of goods you are transporting, and on the other hand, it depends on what road you are driving, right?" ”

B: "Yes, but ......"

A: "If you're driving in a hilly area and you have a long winter, is the pressure on the machines and body of the car a little more than normal?" ”

B: "Yes. ”

A: "You go out more in the winter than in the summer, right?" ”

B: "Much more, our business is not prosperous in the summer." ”

A: "Sometimes there is too much cargo and you are driving in a hilly area in winter, is the car often overloaded?" ”

B: "Yes, that's true. ”

A: "Do you have any leeway when deciding which model to buy?" ”

B: "What do you mean?" ”

A: "In the long run, what makes it worth buying a car?" ”

B: "Of course, it depends on its lifespan." ”

A: "One car is always full and the other car is never overloaded, which one do you think has a longer life?" ”

B: "Of course it's the one with a lot of horsepower and a lot of load." ”

In the end, Party B decided to pay an extra 3,500 yuan to buy a four-ton truck.

In response to the question, Dr. Ralph Nichols of the University of Minnesota in the United States developed a set of key points, which can be summarized as follows:

1. Do not ask questions that you know the other person is unable or unwilling to answer.

2. Use the "communicative media" that the other party is more suitable for to ask questions, and do not pretend to be advanced or show off knowledge.

3. Use silent language appropriately. At the beginning of the question, don't limit the other person's answer, and don't disturb the other person's thoughts.

4. Avoid your questions or questions that cause the other party to "make an adversarial choice". He either avoided answering or walked away.