Chapter 65: Remembrance Before Death
He fell, the moment he fell, he also completely let go of his obsession, the so-called obsession is just inferiority, when he really faces death, how can there be any obsession? Everything is just a flash in the pan, so what can't be put down? After all, people are going to die, and everything that is remembered in life is going to be lost after all, but what can he not let go of if he has never gotten it? It's just a relationship, the obsession of his youth has lasted to the point where he is now, how can he be qualified to maintain his obsession. So in the snow-capped mountains, he chose to close his eyes peacefully, this world has nothing to do with him, he is a passerby in this world, everyone is, and he ended his journey and fell on this snowy peak, maybe it can be regarded as a good beginning and a good end.
There is no action, no thoughts, no meaning of existence, the signs of his life slowly disappear, and the people who care about him are nothing more than a few people, but no one knows, so Zhen Hua is also doomed to die in a foreign land, is it a pity? For Wen Zixin, maybe yes, there is nowhere to put the soul that can't return to the roots, but for Zhen Hua himself, instead of announcing his death in the operating room, it is better to die quietly in this snow-capped mountain, which is already the best ending, just like the saying "After I die, no matter what the waves are", Zhen Hua is like this, he has nothing to do, and he can close his eyes with peace of mind and quietly wait for death to come.
Between life and death, if you look down on everything, you let go of your obsession, you have nothing to pursue, and your life has no purpose. He has a daughter who is like a flower, but the daughter has grown up and is about to become an adult, so he doesn't need to worry about it, not to mention that this last year is also taken care of by Wenzixin; He has someone he loves, and he hasn't let go of it for decades, but so what? It's not his, after all, he has to let go, he has to forget, and he wants to return to the most ordinary friendship, so why should he be obsessed? So he was lighter, there was nothing worth thinking about in this world, and the two people he valued the most would also have their own belonging, and they would have nothing to do with him after all, so whether it was heaven or hell, what did it matter?
Maybe his corpse will be swallowed by this sky of ice and snow, and even the Chinese people believe in the soil for peace, but does Zhen Hua care? Perhaps it is this mentality of putting life and death aside that he can accept this kind of ending. Before going up the mountain, he didn't think that he would die here, and even he was still afraid of death, but an inexplicable force pushed him, allowing him to climb the mountain, and he really saw death. Why bother with tradition? What's more, he has never been a traditional person, let alone the so-called rotten thoughts, and he doesn't believe half a word of the soul, so what can stop him? After all, they are trapped in this world, even as the ancient books say, there are thousands of souls who have nowhere to rest, because this world is a prison for the soul, and true freedom is everywhere, and it is content to breathe, so what is this?
Before death came, he met a new friend, visited a snowy mountain, compared to those who could only pray from the hospital bed, he was much luckier, at least he died on the journey, even if no one knew, so what, he knew where he was, where his home was, where he had his friends, he had in the hearts of those people, and that was enough, and the rest didn't matter. When a person reaches his level, what he values is just the deepest memories of the past, and he has already visited them all, his best friends in high school, his friends in life and death during his journey, and his seniors during work. Maybe it's enough, but there is one more person, the only old person who has not been visited, there is only one, but Zhen Hua will not see her, because it is an unbearable past, and Zhen Hua plays a ruthless man, which is only between the two, and no one else knows.
Zhen Hua can be worthy of everything he has done, but only the emotional part is Zhen Hua's permanent pain, no one knows Zhen Hua's previous marriage, even Wen Zixin has only seen the woman a few times, and he doesn't know the situation at all. But Zhen Hua and that woman officially married, Zhen Hua was poor and white, did not hold a wedding, just registered a marriage certificate and hastily understood, and the subsequent life was also a mess, just to prevent the friends of both sides from misunderstanding, in front of outsiders, they showed great affection, but the actual relationship broke down a month after marriage, and Zhen Hua never even paid any feelings to that woman, on the one hand, the marriage of the year was to try to forget Wen Zixin and start a new life, On the one hand, it was to give Zhen Wenxin a reasonable identity, so that marriage became a victim, and that woman also became a cover for Zhen Hua.
Maybe this is a cruel practice, but Zhen Hua didn't think about it so much at that time, how young he was at that time, and he didn't have any psychological burden to act recklessly, but a year later, both parties couldn't adapt to this kind of life without any feelings, the woman left a sentence "I will never see each other again in this life", so they officially announced their divorce, and the divorce was just a simple divorce certificate, Zhen Hua was just a poor boy at that time, and there was no family property to divide, so Zhen Hua could not give any material compensation, and when Zhen Hua made a fortune, that woman disappeared without a trace, maybe he never wanted to have anything to do with Zhen Hua anymore, this is the first time Zhen Hua has hurt a woman, and he has also broken a woman's injury, but he can't make up for it, which is also the regret of his life.
If it was before death, who was the person he wanted to see the most, maybe it was not one of Wen Zixin and Zhen Wenxin, but the nominal ex-wife, Zhen Hua wanted to make amends and make up for his sins when he was young as much as possible, but he didn't have this opportunity, and who knew whether that woman was alive or dead now, she lost her news more than ten years ago, and asked all her friends, but no one knew, it was like the world had evaporated, of course, Zhen Hua didn't have it at this time? He was buried in this snow-capped mountain, no one knew about it, and he didn't evaporate from the world, and he evaporated more completely, because his illness was known to someone, so his life was limited, so after the best treatment time, no one would care about his whereabouts, he was a dead man after all, and there was no point in looking for a corpse.
It's a pity, he should have thought that someone would cry for his life, he could even imagine Wen Zixin's haggard appearance after learning of his death, and he could also imagine Zhen Wenxin's appearance of instantly collapsing after knowing it, but he was going to go through it after all, nothing could stop the pace of death, since he had come to this point, then he had to Wen Zixin and Zhen Wenxin be ready to face this news, even if they couldn't do it, they had to grit their teeth and do it, this is Zhen Hua, A cold-blooded and ruthless Zhen Hua, maybe this is what he was originally like, otherwise how could he hurt a woman to the point that they would never see each other again in this life? It was all his sins, so there is now retribution.
In fact, the woman back then, Zhen Hua was about to forget, and she couldn't even recall the other party's name, but she vaguely remembered the outline of her face. The regret when he was dying, but he didn't recall the woman's name after all, and after a complete coma, he lost the ability to think, and it was impossible to recall the past, after all, he was also an old man who was wiped out in the gears of time, maybe Zhen Hua just hoped that the woman he had injured already had her own home, as for other evil thoughts, Zhen Hua didn't dare to have them.
A love, a memory, is Zhen Hua's fault, but also the sin of youth and frivolity, if you can make a new decision, maybe Zhen Hua will choose to break off the contact between the two after the first meeting, and it will not create those unbearable things in the future, but unfortunately there is no if in life, it is an unforgivable sin after all, and it is also the pain in Zhen Hua's heart, but no one knows about this past, he was still too young back then, and now he may be mature, but his life has come to an end, so he can't do it, He longs for the other party's forgiveness, so as to get redemption, but redemption cannot come, all he gets is karma, if that woman knows Zhen Hua's situation at this time, she may feel very happy, the wicked person has finally received the punishment he deserves.
But is that really the case? Where is that woman? Maybe this is a question, what if the woman is on the snowy mountain at this time? Even when Zhen Hua stepped into this ancient town, he had already noticed where Zhen Hua was? What kind of person will Zhen Hua's former wife be? Maybe even Zhen Hua himself can't say clearly, because Zhen Hua has never really understood his ex-wife, but Zhen Hua has never paid attention to the details after he lived in the inn, maybe his manic mood does not allow him to think about the details around him, but if he looks closely, there are too many things wrong.
That small inn, according to Brother Snake, is it run by one person, but a two-story inn with more than 20 rooms can be managed by one person? Furthermore, no matter how hospitable the innkeeper is, will he take the initiative to enlighten and persuade a traveler who behaves quite strangely? Of course, the most obvious flaw is that the second floor of the inn has a sign prohibiting entry after Zhen Hua lives in the inn, and the balcony in the corner of the second floor has been hung with women's clothes, so how can there be only one person in that small inn, Brother Snake, so who is the person who can hide? Zhen Hua wouldn't know, because Zhen Hua had forgotten her name, so why should he have the luxury of knowing that the woman was still watching him? He closed his eyes peacefully, but there were two people on the snowy mountain who were shouting his name in tears, trying to save his life.