I opened my eyes in the silent darkness, looked at the black hole around me, looked at the window with the curtains half-covered, and I suddenly felt a panic, it was a strange feeling to be alive, am I alive? In what capacity and in what kind of body am I living? Is it the body of only twenty-one years old who lives to feel the world and feel all the feelings?

Under the onslaught of this panic, I couldn't sleep, my mind was in chaos, body, body?

Suddenly, I thought of the scars on my body for no reason, the scars that Li Yun found, those scars that I usually don't pay attention to at all!

When exactly did these scars appear and how did they come about? Why am I unremembered and have no memory?

I couldn't sleep even more when I thought of the inexplicable scars on my body, and when Li Yun first found those strange-shaped scars, I didn't pay much attention to it, thinking that maybe I had forgotten the experience of childhood injuries.

But now, in the dark study, I suddenly remembered them. Every scar must have its history, its memory, and the meaning of its existence.

But why can't I remember where they came from, do they really belong to me?

I jumped up and rushed into the bathroom without hesitation, then found the mirror, removed it from the wall, and picked up my clothes. The light was dim, and I couldn't see exactly what the scar on my back was, but I could vaguely see that it was a long, faint mark. However, I could clearly see the crescent-like scar on the back of the shoulder.

This is ridiculous! I roared to myself, this scar, it's just—it's bitten out with my teeth! To be precise, this should be the teeth of a human being!

I was dizzy and stood in the middle of the bathroom for a long time.

Then my sanity came back to me, and I hung the mirror back on the wall, and looked at myself in the mirror again, yes, this should be me, just younger than I would be.

I quietly walked back to my study. In the dead of night, there was no sound around, but my doubts and fears surrounded my mind more and more. I could only close my eyes and wait helplessly for the nerves in my brain to fall asleep after exhaustion.

It's not clear at all when I fell asleep, but I woke up when the morning sun shone on my face.

The faint sound of firecrackers outside reminded me that it was the last day of the Lunar New Year. The sun was shining outside the window, and it was the warm sunshine of a delightful winter day, enough to restore a little life to the icy earth. Yet my heart was as confused and melancholy as last night, and all of it suddenly seemed strange to me.

Obviously, when you find out who your body really is, or who I am and who I am, you will naturally be deeply suspicious of your own existence.

Going back to the past is not the same as simply repeating it, I don't seem to be repeating my own history now, so whose history am I repeating?

I have been worried since I got up, this mentality was quickly noticed by my mother, she said Xiaoxu, did you not sleep well last night, why are your eyes red?

Li Yun also looked at me with concern and said, "What's wrong with you, are you uncomfortable?"

I smiled and said, "It's nothing, don't worry, I was inexplicably excited for a while at the thought of the Chinese New Year, haha." ”

The old mother said strangely: "This child is really weird, he has to celebrate the New Year every year, and he doesn't have any New Year's money for you, what are you excited about." ”

I whispered at the root of Li Yun's ear, "Don't you think you can't sleep?"

Li Yun was so shy that the roots of her ears turned red all of a sudden, as if my words had directly acted on the roots of her ears.

In the Chinese New Year's Eve, the whole family began to clean up. This year was no exception, and the four of us each took over a piece of the area and started working on it.

I kept looking nervously at my dad and then at my mom, as if to verify something. By the way, the image in my memory is like this, my parents are not much different from my parents of nineteen years, that is, they are younger. After thinking about it again and again, I finally couldn't help but call my mother to the study and say that I had something to say to her.

My mother watched me bang on the study door and close it inexplicably, her face heavy. She asked, "What the hell is wrong with your child?" Is something wrong?"

I said, "I'm fine, but, Mom, I want to ask you, have I ever had such a shoulder and lower back injury before?"

My mother was so shocked that her face changed, and she said nervously, "What, are your shoulders uncomfortable?" Show me!"

As she spoke, she approached me, and I quickly stopped her and said, "No, no, I'm in good health, no problem." I just had a dream last night, and I can't remember it anymore. ”

"Oh," said my mother with a sigh of relief, "I'm scared to death, it's okay." By the way, when you were a child, you were really like a living treasure, and your father and I treated you as a treasure, and spoiled you too much. ”

My mother smiled and said, "I'm really afraid of spoiling you." You say hurt? How is that possible, you have never been seriously injured since you were a child, I remember that you were cut on your finger by a knife before, and you got a long wound that scared your dad to death. The rest seems to be gone. Alas, this is not good, the flower bones in the greenhouse will not bloom for a lifetime. ”

My mother was chattering there, but I felt colder and colder, as if the strong sunlight outside the window had completely disappeared in my heart.

I said okay, I know, I'm going to work as a greenhouse flower. With that, he went to mop the floor.

The Spring Festival is still the same as the Spring Festival, and it is similar every year. Firecrackers, sumptuous dinners, Spring Festival parties, melon seeds, sugar, chatting, playing cards, over the years, the form has not changed much.

I play the role of a happy son and a happy boyfriend all day long. My mother has basically regarded Li Yun as her future daughter-in-law. My mom has always been more straightforward and open-minded, and to be honest, I just bring any girl home to show her, and she basically has no opinion. Only my dad seems to be still missing Han Meiling.

Is this really relevant to me, though?

What's going on with those mysterious scars?

After the Spring Festival, Li Yun said, aren't you looking for Qian Haiping? Let's get in touch with Guo Ming.

So I called Guo Ming's home, first paid a New Year's greeting, congratulated him a few words, and then told him, Qian Haiping and I want to get together with you, I don't know if it's convenient for you.

Guo Ming hesitated on the phone, and then said: "I'm too small there, and it feels too crowded when there are too many people, so let's go to Manjuelong's place for tea." ”

I said, dude, it's winter, is there any tea there?

Guo Ming said: "Don't worry, that place is good, I'll call Qian Haiping in a while, he is absolutely familiar with that place, haha." ”

Guo Ming said that he could go when he contacted Qian Haiping, and said that he wanted me to call him again in the afternoon, and if there was no accident, we would meet tomorrow.