When I got home and finished eating, I told my parents to leave me alone and that I had to do something, and then I locked myself in my bedroom. Then I opened the "Corolla", and it wasn't a beer with a lot of foam, nor did it have a strong beer flavor, but it had a faint fruity aroma.

I knew I couldn't forget her eyes, and from the time I saw her, I knew they were eyes that fascinated me, as clear and bright as the moon in the sky.

After that day, I couldn't access the Internet for several days, and my work was like snowflakes, and when I got home, I really wanted to do it, and that was to sleep, and I still didn't feel enough until the next morning.

About a week later, I went online again, and I was shocked when I opened my mailbox. There were two dozen emails and greeting cards in it, and my mailbox was almost full. No, I didn't offend anyone, so I wouldn't be bombarded with spam! Quickly close the office door and read them one by one, from the beginning I knew that it was all letters from "Fei Fei".

Drunkard: Hello!

I didn't see you online today, I don't know why, whether I was scared to see me, or drunk with beer. Oh, I really didn't expect you to be such a man, I thought you must be a tall and big standard man, but I really never thought that you would look thin like this, maybe you are not a man who can be remembered at a glance, but I know that you are like a book, there are deep emotions under the appearance that is not gorgeous. I appreciate and love it. The woman who is with you must be very happy, I really don't know why your wife left you, if I would definitely hold on tightly. Maybe I'm confused, I haven't asked your name for such a long time, and I can only call you "drunkard" until now, I hope you don't mind. All right?

I don't know why I will completely open my heart to you, in front of you I have an urge to throw into your arms, I really don't understand how it happened, I know that my thoughts like this are very bad, and even hurt your thoughts about me, but I hope you understand that it is just the most real emotion in my heart, life is not necessarily back to the same development as I expect, so I know that what I can do is to tell you what I think, I don't want you to accept it, But I know what to do and what not to do, and I just hope that when you have free time, I can accept the most truthful words from me, a woman who has few secrets in front of you.

Best wishes!

Fei Fei was talking about her mood like this, and there were many things like diaries. There were many, many of the truest thoughts in her heart, a pure mind and the most dreamy longing like many young girls.

Looking at it word by word, I slowly realized that she was really as bright as the moon in the eyes I saw. And it is not the moon that hangs in the sky, because the moon in the sky is bright and shining, but it is far away. She is like the moon in the water, and the moon in the water, although hazy, is very close and beautiful. Fei Fei is as simple as a child, and from her words, I see a girl singing and enjoying her spiritual space alone. Perhaps it was because her mother was accustomed to accepting her father's violent temper that she thought that the most important thing a woman should do was to accept it, and even completely obeyed her parents' wishes in marriage. Her parents are the kind of people who have no money but are bent on fishing for a golden beetle, perhaps because the Chinese are really poor. And she is also very filial, no wonder how she married her husband, this world is really not very fair to many people, of course, it can also be said to be fair, because what you get is always lost, but the person who pays the price suffers unfair treatment, which is just reflected in her body, perhaps to be precise, she is lucky, in addition to her husband who doesn't really love her, her in-laws may be very good to her! It's just that the discrimination and restrictions in her heart make her feel completely lost. She is as beautiful and close as the moon in the water, but like the moon in the water, she is not actually her real self, but she exists helplessly in this society. And you have to adapt and accept, and you have no choice but to accept it.

After reading all her emails, my heart was very heavy, and I knew that if she was by my side at this time, I would definitely hug her tightly to reduce the heavy grievances in her heart, which may be the only thing I can do. After reading her email, I knew very well that I couldn't really do anything for her, maybe only to listen to her inner anguish when she needed it.

The time turned out to be from noon to night, and there was no one in the office for a long time, only the aunt who did the cleaning was busy. The moonlight outside the window shone on me through the glass, and I suddenly realized that my own face was so pale reflected in the glass window. I don't know if I should do that, but there is a voice in my heart that keeps reminding me that I should call Fei Fei and let her know that her feelings are already in my heart.

"Good evening!"

"Is that you? It's really you," Fei Fei's tone was full of surprise, as if she had seen a certain hope in despair.

"It's me. I've seen your email, and I've been seeing it since noon today. Just finished reading. ”

"You're still in the office?"

"Yes."

"Have you eaten?"

"Not yet, I just finished reading your email, and I didn't know it was so late, because your email made me have to read it seriously."

"Thank you. I thought you wouldn't bother me anymore. ”

"How so? It's been a busy few days, and I want to sleep when I get home. I'm just a little free today. ”

Fei Fei was silent for a while and said, "That's the real me, can you understand?" ”

"I know. That's why I'm calling you right away, not wanting you to misunderstand. ”

"I really thought you wouldn't pay attention to me anymore!"

"I'm sorry. I am so

y”

"No, I don't want to hear you say such things, it's all my fault, and you haven't eaten yet."

"It's okay, I'm not hungry yet."

"Is this good, I'll invite you to dinner." Fei Fei suddenly said something that surprised me.

"Now?"

"Yes, now."

"Then he ......" I really don't know how to answer.

"He's not here. Don't you want to? ”

"No, it's not. Just ......"

"You just have to say good or bad."

I thought in silence, and despite the strong urge I had when I read her email, I couldn't think of a reason for me to do that, and I couldn't find a reason to say no.

"Where?" Emotions may be the most advantageous weapon against reason and harm in many cases, I don't know how many people can refuse, but my emotional factors prevail over all my thinking.

"Where?" I really can't think of a reason to say no.

"The old place, it's still McDonald's. All right? ”

"Okay. I'll clean up and go. ”

"See you in twenty minutes. Bye. ”

"Bye-bye."

When I hung up the phone, my heartbeat was inexplicably intense, and I don't know why. Looking at the moon outside the window, it seemed to be floating towards me, approaching, as if I could reach out and grab it in my arms.

I don't know if it's because each other's mood is not as relaxed and happy as the last time, this meal was quickly finished, and the moon in the sky was already bright and lovely when I walked out of McDonald's. I've always been accustomed to walking briskly, and I started to slow down under the moonlight, and of course I know that the main reason is because Fei Fei is by my side. Today she didn't seem as relaxed as last time, and she felt a little melancholy under the moonlight. We are not as talkative as we are on the Internet or on the phone, and the atmosphere today has become as solemn as the moonlight.

Just now, maybe we all had a passionate impulse when we didn't meet, but when we met, reason controlled our whole scene.

"He's not back today, is he?" Originally, I wanted to break this overly dignified scene, but as soon as I said it, I knew how wrong I was.

"I'm used to it, but I'll have to stay home and wait for him to come back." Fei Fei's tone was obviously very sad.

In the blink of an eye, the atmosphere between us was not only solemn but also sad. I stopped.

"Fei Fei ......"

"Don't say anything, okay? Walk with me. ”

"Okay."

"I know you love singing, can you sing for me?" Fei Fei looked at me with her bright eyes, a look of anticipation that could not be refused.

"What song do you want to hear?"

"I'll listen to whatever you sing."

Leaning on the sidewalk guardrail on the side of the road and looking at Fei Fei, countless lyrics flashed in my head, but to my mouth it was only the old song that I couldn't remember the lyrics at all, it was a song with a very beautiful and soothing melody, a little low: "Let me look at your eyes, see every beat in your heart, the sparse and ordinary bits and pieces, deepened at this moment; Let me listen to your voice, to listen to every beat of your heart, that gently fluctuating little bit of emotion, moving at this moment; I want to hold every breath of yours and I want to ......"

Before my singing was over, tears had already appeared in Fei Fei's eyes in the light of the moonlight, and her damp eyes were really as lovely as the moon in the water. I couldn't let my singing continue, for Fifi had already collapsed her whole body into my arms, and I naturally hugged her gently after a moment's pause, letting her tears wet my shoulders. Gently patting her on the back, I didn't dare to say anything more, I knew that that sentence would be a promise, and a promise that I didn't have confidence in keeping.

I'm not entirely sure if Fei Fei would have had insomnia that night, but I'm sure she'll have as much trouble falling asleep as I did. I may be able to do nothing for her, maybe I can do anything. But after all, she and I are people in two different worlds, and we are also two different life experiences. Maybe what I should do is to walk away, maybe that will keep her and me in a stable life for herself and her, I'm not stupid, of course I know Fei Fei's current state of mind, but I ...... At times like these, my proud heart realizes how powerless it is. In this society, I am actually so small, so small that I only know that I am just a gravel in the face of life, passively accepting with the ups and downs of the tide, passively surviving and disappearing.