"Ayuki...... You're so stupid. I hugged Ah Xue's little head, unable to suppress the turmoil and ups and downs in my heart.

"I'm stupid......" Ah Xue stuck to my arms, twitching in a crying voice, "Brother, you have a good brain, I have known since I was a child, if there is one person who can bring hope to our family, it is you." Brother, you are 100 times smarter than me, even if you are disfigured, you are still a hundred times smarter than me, and there will definitely be a way to make money to support your family in the future. ”

I closed my eyes and sighed faintly, but I didn't speak.

Ah Xue's words have touched me completely.

This is the voice of Ah Xue that I have never heard before.

I always thought I knew Ah Xue well, but I never considered her thoughts.

"Brother, I know, in fact, you have a lot of things to hide from me. Including the origin of Sister Hu Xian, you and your friends have done some mysterious things, I know all of them...... However, I will not come to blame you and will not ask you. Because I know that brother, if you don't tell those, it must be for my good, and you have a reason. ”

My heartstrings were tugged at by Xue's delicate and soft voice. Although I knew that Ah Xue had some insight into some of my little secrets, I was still deeply moved when she forgave and forgave me even though she knew my secrets.

"Ayuki...... You...... "......I sighed heavily, my fists clenched, and finally I let go weakly.

A pair of soft little hands held the back of my hand, and from that small palm, I felt the warmth that was transmitted.

Ah Xue's voice came into my ears one after another:

"Brother...... Do you remember the story of the 'Rebirth of the Eagle' that you told me and Sister Yanyan when you were a child? I want to hear that story, and you can tell it to me now, okay?"

The Rebirth of the Eagle......

Hearing these incomparably familiar but distant words, my body shook slightly.

Thinking about it, when Ah Xue and Yanyan were young, my brother, who read poetry and books, did tell them countless stories.

And in the story of the vast sea of stars, there is indeed this story.

"Ah Xue, I know what you mean, but it's inappropriate to say this now......"

"Brother, I want to hear it. Tell me, okay?" Xue held my little hand tightly, but there was a bit of stubbornness in her voice. "I like to hear your stories the most. When I was a child, as long as I listened to my brother's story, no matter what kind of trouble it was, I could forget it. Now, I want to hear your story. As it used to be. ”

Tell another story.

This is Ah Xue's request to me.

Even the requirements for me.

I can't say no.

I was silent for a moment, and finally sighed softly, then reached forward with my right hand, and carefully landed on Ah Xue's head, and then calmed down the turbulent heart, trying to let my thoughts fly to the distant past.

At last, I finally opened my mouth and began to tell the story of the eagle in a deep tone like an old man.

"'The Story of the Eagle', this story comes from the article "The Rebirth of the Eagle" published by the President of TCL Group. Others say it comes from the Book of Comfort by the prophet Isaiah. The truth is not exquisite, but it is borrowed by many people. ”

I narrated it unhurriedly, meaningfully:

"The eagle is the longest-lived bird in the world, it can reach 70 years of age in its lifetime. ”

"But very few eagles live that long. To live that long, they have to make difficult but important decisions at the age of 40. By that time, their beaks had become long and curved, almost touching their chests, their claws had begun to age and dull, making them unable to catch their prey effectively, and their feathers had become thicker and thicker, and their wings had become so heavy that it was difficult to fly.

At this point, the eagle had only two choices: either wait for death, or go through a very painful process of renewal—a long metamorphosis of 150 days. They have to work hard to fly to the top of the mountain, build a nest on the cliff, and stay there and are not allowed to fly. ”

"The eagles first hit the rock violently with their beaks until the bleeding breaks and makes it fall off completely, and then quietly wait for a new beak to grow. The eagle will use its newly grown beak to pull out the aged toenails from its talons one by one, and the blood will be spilled drop by drop. When the new toenails grow, the eagle uses the new toenails to pluck the feathers off its body one by one.

"This experience will last for five months...... After 5 months, the new feathers have grown, and the eagle is able to start flying again and live 30 years of glory again. Until 30 years later, when they are so old that their feathers fall off, their flesh hardens and can no longer be resuscitated, and they understand that their death is approaching and they can no longer fly in the blue sky, they will burn out their last strength at the last moment of their lives, rush hard, fly to the blue sky, and then reach the closest place to the blue sky, and fall weakly to the bottom of the lake, and die quietly...... The eagle's obsession with the blue sky is something that even the biological and scientific communities cannot explain......"

This is undoubtedly a shocking and inspirational story, but the authenticity of the story itself has been questioned by many people.

Of course, I never told Ah Xue that it was a fictional story.

Because I want her to get a motivation to fight and work hard when she is desperate.

And I also understand the intention of Ah Xue to choose to let me tell this story at this time.

She wanted to encourage me and motivate me.

Cheer me up.

Even though...... That's almost impossible.

"Brother, you really remember this story. Then you should know the truth of this story, brother?!"

"Know, there is no rest in life, make a comeback, and be reborn in Nirvana. The flowing water in front of the door is still able to go west, and Hugh will sing the yellow chicken with white hair. Who has no tiger to fall on the day of Pingyang, when I make a comeback...... That's probably what it means. I said quietly.

But I know that these are just self-consoling jokes

It's just that at this moment, I understand Ah Xue's mind, even if I know the naivety and hypocrisy behind these inspirational words, I won't show it in front of Ah Xue.

Just like most people in the world know that Helen Keller is blind, deaf and mute, but very few people know that she has a super memory of remembering 20,000 words an hour and that her father is from a famous family or most people only know that Lei Feng does good deeds without leaving a name, only leaving photos and writing down his good people and good deeds in his diary, at this moment, I need to pretend to be the most people who are ignorant and obedient and are penetrated by the public's thoughts, to satisfy the kindness of Ah Xue's bitter words.

"Look, you know all about it. Since you know all this and have taught me this, then you can't give up! If the eagle is still like that, why do you give up on yourself like this? Brother, promise me that you must live well and stop doing such things to hurt yourself, I really feel heartbroken to see you like this. If you want to kill yourself again, brother, I'm ...... I'll die with you, too!"

Ah Xue's last words really scared me, I didn't expect Ah Xue to threaten me with such cruel words.

"Ah Xue, what are you talking nonsense, don't do anything stupid. I took Ah Xue's hand and clenched her tightly, but found that her hands were also trembling, obviously, Ah Xue's emotions were quite excited and nervous.

Feeling the trembling of Ah Xue's little hands and the blazing temperature of her palms, the guilt and uneasiness in my heart became more and more intense.

"Then brother, cheer up, brother, you are smarter than me, even if you are disfigured, as long as you have eyes, you can still achieve great things. And, your eyes ...... It can definitely be recovered!" A Xue heard a sobbing sound from the tip of her nose, and I was worried when I heard it.

Ah Xue held my little hand with more and more force, and the whispered and delicate whispers were like a spring breeze blowing across my cheeks, making me like a cloud:

"Brother, as long as you live, there is always hope, right?"

"......" My heartstrings trembled slightly, and the hand holding Ah Xue also shook unconsciously.

Alive? Hope?

I laughed at myself in my heart, but on my ugly face, I tried my best to smile comfortingly:

"yes. There will always be hope. Xue, what did you say...... Right. ”

How desperate does one have to be to say such a thing?

In the end, I finally didn't have the idea of self-determination, but because I was worried that I would be duplicitous after staying alone in the ICU for a long time, and I restarted the idea of dying, Ah Xue stayed by my side, talked to me, and recalled with me the days when the family was happy together.

“...... When I was young, our family was still a little down in Nanchang District, an urban village on the side of Cao Po Bridge on Yongfeng Road, and our family was really small at that time. The urban village is full of handshake buildings, veneer buildings and kissing buildings, and the cramped and humid environment is so bad, even in broad daylight, you can't see the sun, brother, you still call the place where we live 'a line of sky'. ”

Xue tells the story of our childhood. At that time, we did not live in the shantytown area in the south of the city, but in the more dirty and gloomy urban village, and after living in it for three years, by chance, a policeman surnamed Liu, who took over the community in that area, knew the conditions of our family, and out of a little sympathy, gave us information about the shantytown, and we moved and have lived in that area ever since.

Ah Xue's words greatly evoked my memories, and scenes of childhood stories came to my heart.

In addition to the thieves who steal, there are also rotten dwarf mules who specialize in extorting shops and retail stores, and the dark places where dirt and dirt are hidden, and there are two types of people who gather the most, one is the gamblers who carry snakeskin bags in the storage vault for underground gambling, and the other is the street women and women who move out of the stools and sit in front of the foot bath parlor, massage parlor or hair salon to solicit customers, and the women who have lost their feet all day long shouting at customers to go in and knock on their backs.

"yes, it was bitter enough back then. Fraudsters, thieves, hooligans, gangsters, and gamblers are everywhere in urban villages, and counterfeit money, black talk, human trafficking, fights, kidnappings, and ticket tearing also occur from time to time. It was really bitter at that time. It's really not easy for Mom to take care of us. "I feel a lot of emotion when I think of the slums where psoriasis is everywhere and the walls are covered with family planning and corn-pulling advertising slogans. Wuxi City has the largest number of urban villages in Jiangsu Province, and it can be regarded as the most chaotic place.

“...... Although it was hard at that time, the family was able to be together every day, Sister Yanyan was with us, and my mother's body was also healthy...... And brother...... At that time, it was wonderful. Xue said in a tone of extreme longing, as if her thoughts had gone back to that distant and warm era.

"It would be nice to be able to go back to the way it was......"

Ah Xue said sadly, and the faint voice was like a drifting wind, gently swirling around the root of my ears.

The warmth coming from the palms of the hands, the pure words, the faint fragrance, and the sadness that unconsciously infected the heart.

"yes, it would be nice to go back to the way ...... before"

Back in the days when there was no sadness.

In other words, I don't understand what the sad age is.

Ah Xue was next to my shoulder, and I was stunned for a while, and after a while, I felt a soft snoring sound in my arms, and Ah Xue actually fell asleep in my arms.

I smiled helplessly, and gently leaned back, leaning back against the head of the bed and falling into deep thought, letting Xue take a nap on my lap on the bed.

During the day, the police once asked me to take a confession, but at that time I chose to remain silent and tight-lipped, they were not able to get much information from my mouth, and finally under the advice of the doctor, the police chose to wait for my physical condition to recover before coming to me to take a confession.

While Ah Xue was asleep, the caregiver came in and pulled out the needle for me, and changed a bottle of glucose drip to replenish my nutrients after three days without eating. She didn't notice that I had ever tried to kill myself.

After the caregivers closed the door and left, the ICU room became extremely quiet again.

I lay there quietly, my vision dark, my eyes couldn't catch the light, the only thing I could feel was sound.

As the 5% concentration of glucose water slowly entered my body, I felt the sleepiness in my brain gradually surged, everything in my memory became extremely blurry, and I don't know how long it took me to finally fall asleep.

I had a dream.

A long, deep dream. In the dream, I saw Yanyan and Ah Xue, and I also saw my mother wearing an apron, with a simple complexion, and extremely healthy, and I also dreamed of the tall back of the man who ruthlessly left our family and left, and at the same time, there was also a peerless shadow that was so beautiful that I was suffocated that flickered in my dream, and the fluttering hair shuttled through every corner of the dream, and the fragrance that was as thick as ink rhyme, even in the dream, lingered on the tip of my nose......

I don't know how long it took, but there was a gentle back thrust on my back, and at the same time, a soft sound drilled into my ears and woke me up.

"Brother, brother, wake up, wake up. Fast. ”

It's still Axue's voice.

It's just that this time, Ah Xue's voice seemed to be a little eager and happy.

"What's wrong, Ah Xue?" my brain gradually cleared up, and I turned around and asked where Ah Xue's voice came from.

"Brother...... That one...... I have corneas! Brother, I have contacted someone! It was someone from the Wuxi Red Cross Society who contacted me through the hospital phone and said that there was a gentleman who was willing to donate corneas!" Ah Xue's voice was filled with extreme excitement and joy. Even my heart was pounding.

"Someone...... Would you like to donate your cornea?" I frowned, "Who is it? There are very few people who donate corneas alive, and corneas have always been one of the most scarce transplanted organs in China. Who can provide...... Not much, right?"

"That...... It was a gentleman surnamed Yao, his wife died of stomach cancer, and his wife took the initiative to donate her cornea before she died, saying that she wanted to donate ......" Ah Xue grabbed my hand and cried with joy.

"Liar. "It's just that when I heard Ah Xue's words, I sank down.

"What, what?" When I said this, Ah Xue was suddenly startled, and her words became a little incoherent. "How did I lie, it's true!"

"Ah Xue, you lie. "Hospitals and institutions like the Red Cross donate corneas from people with cancer. So, you're lying to me. Let's be honest. ”

When I said this, Ah Xue suddenly fell silent, and the little hand holding me became hot.

After pondering for a moment, Ah Xue paused, and said with some embarrassment:

"That...... In fact, a migrant worker from Guangzhou who came to Wuxi to work was beaten to death, and then ...... The body was unclaimed, and someone got the retina through unclean channels and said that they would sell it to me for 100,000 yuan......" Ah Xue's voice was obviously low, obviously because the previous lie was exposed by me on the spot.

"Still lying. I said lightly, "In that case, Ah Xue, you can tell me the name, age, ID number, specific place of work, occupation, phone number of the person who contacted you, when did he contact you, how long did you talk to him, where did you answer the phone, his age, voice characteristics, residential address, professional background, by the way, tell me all the content of your chat with him? ”

I said lightly.

"......" was asked by me, and Ah Xue's side suddenly became hesitant. "This ...... Brother ......"

"Hehe, are you still lying to me? Tell me, what the hell is going on with this cornea. ”

I said sternly.

Ah Xue grabbed my hand, but the palm of the hand was warm, and I could even guess Ah Xue's nervousness through the beating of the veins in Ah Xue's wrist joint.

"That...... Brother ...... "Ah Xue is stumbling, secretive, and seems to be looking for words that can deal with me.

"I sold it to her. At this moment, a thick man's voice sounded in the ward, and the sudden sound shook my heart.

The man's voice is a nasal voice with both lips, when pronouncing, the lips are closed, the soft palate is drooping, the airflow is poured out from the nasal cavity, and the airflow is blocked, and the nasal voice is heavy, which is a sign of acute rhinitis or sinusitis, the rhythm and speed of the other party's language are normal, but there is air leakage of the lips and teeth when speaking, so it can be inferred that the other party's front teeth may be missing.

In general, the front teeth are rarely missing. If the other person's front teeth are missing, it is likely that they were beaten or lost because they were too reckless. From this, I can probably infer that the other party's personality may be more reckless and impatient, and may even be a hot-tempered character in a fight, or even a gangster bastard and other gangsters.

"Who is he?" I asked in a deep voice.

"Brother...... That, he's Mr. Zhou, the person who contacted me and sold my corneas......" Ah Xue said beside me with some embarrassment.

I asked in a hoarse voice, "What conditions did he offer?"

"450,000. The other party said lightly.

"Huh. I smiled. I finally understood why Ah Xue refused to tell me the truth. It turned out that someone had blackmailed such a high fee. I turned my head to the place where the man's voice was, and said with a sneer:

"It's a lot of money. I guess the source isn't very clean, right?"

"You don't have to ask about that. I'm just offering this opportunity. It's not convenient for us to disclose the source, but I have the Red Cross's "Voluntary Application Consent Form". In short, whether you want to buy it or not depends on you, and whether you want to have surgery or not is your own business. The price issue, this is not negotiable, 450,000 is already the average price. ”

"Huh. I smiled, but didn't say anything. This is indeed a non-negotiable price, after all, compared to the brightness of a person's life, 450,000 is too insignificant. After all, corneas, which have no market value, are illegally traded.

"Brother, I know it's expensive...... But you agree...... As long as your eyes can recover...... Anyway, you won the lottery to get the money at home, right?"

Ah Xue's words were very careful, and her tone was soft and tactful, but I couldn't argue with what she meant.

If...... My eyes were really able to recover.

Then, perhaps, my soul hooking technique can be used again.

And if I can use Soul Hooking, then no matter how much money I invest now, it's definitely worth it.

And even if the soul hooking technique can't be recovered, at least, my eyes can regain their light, it's just a little more expensive.

After sorting this out, in the end, I nodded and said:

"Xue, thank you for taking the trouble to contact the cornea for me. The price...... I accept. ”

"Great......" Ah Xue's cry of relief came, as if relieved. "Brother, that's great. In the slightly comforting voice, I don't know why, but there is still a trace of crying.

It's just that from Ah Xue's slightly crying voice, there is a trace of uneasiness in my heart.

"Ah Xue, are you ...... What did you hide from me and not tell me?" I asked, frowning.

"No...... No, I don't. I lied to you because the cornea is too expensive, and I'm afraid that you won't want to......" Ah Xue heard my questioning and hurriedly denied it.

"Axue, give me your hand. I said lightly, then held out my right hand.

"Brother, what are you going to do?" asked Ah Xue worriedly.

"I was able to tell if a person was lying by the beating of a person's pulse. Give me your hand and I'll take the pulse. I said lightly.

"Brother...... What is this for...... Don't you believe me?" Ah Xue didn't hand me his hand, but asked me angrily.

"Yes, I don't believe it. My tone remained the same. "Ah Xue, give me my hand. ”

"This ...... Brother!" Ah Xue screamed with some dissatisfaction.

But I repeated it again and waved my hand:

"Give it to me. If I don't get it, I won't get a cornea transplant. ”

My words that I can't disobey seem to make Ah Xue embarrassed. And the doubts in my heart are getting heavier and heavier. Even, I had a very ominous premonition. If Ah Xue really refuses to give me her hand, it means that she is indeed lying to me. Meantime...... It also shows that she paid more than 450,000 yuan for my cornea transplant.

Just when I was suspicious in my heart, a small and cold jade hand suddenly fell into the palm of my hand.

It's Axue's hand.

I subconsciously grabbed her hand, and my thumb quickly pressed the vein area of my wrist, only to find ...... The pulse beat was unusually gentle, and there was no sign of disorder or agitation. I took my pulse for 20 seconds, and I didn't feel a single pulse disturbance caused by the accelerated blood flow caused by lying.

"Brother, how is ......it? I didn't lie to you, did I?"

Ah Xue's voice came, and then I felt the cold in my hand, and the slender hand retracted.

My hand was still in mid-air, but my mind kept recalling the cold touch on the tips of my fingers when I took the pulse just now, and I couldn't recover for a long time......

After a long pause, I paused and said slowly:

"Got it. I underwent surgery. ”

"Great......" Xue said in a relieved voice, and I was also slightly relieved, my right hand clenched into an empty fist.

Can my eyes really be restored to their original state?

Even if I get back to normal, can I still use my soul hooking technique as usual?

And, why, I have an indescribable sense of insecurity and guilt in my heart, which ...... Why exactly?

And so my corneal transplant was decided.

Corneal transplantation is currently the most successful procedure among organ transplants, so I don't have much to worry about whether the surgery will be successful.

Even, after I agreed to undergo corneal transplantation, Ah Xue filled out the "Surgical Consent Form" for me as soon as possible, because my disfigurement incident is the most serious incident in Wuxi Third Hospital in recent days, so the hospital has also opened the door for my corneal surgery. Because Ah Xue told me that the gentleman surnamed Zhou had already provided the cornea from the hospital, I could go directly to the cornea repair surgery without waiting for surgery.

In one morning, the surgeon from the ophthalmology department of the hospital did an OCT examination of my eye, and checked the lower eyelid conjunctiva, inferior fornix, upper eyelid conjunctiva, and superior fornix to confirm that I had no bleeding and moved to meet the conditions for surgery, and quickly decided on the operation plan.

The surgery was scheduled for 3 p.m.

Because corneal transplantation is often done as early as possible. If I delay for too long, my damaged eye nerve will become a clump and heal on its own, which will make the operation more difficult. So my surgery was urgent.

At 2:40 p.m., Zhang Yijun, the chief ophthalmology doctor in charge of my corneal transplant, arrived at the ICU ward and asked Ah Xue and several surgeons to carry me all the way to the operating car and push me all the way to the operating room.

My surgery was a penetrating keratoplasty, which is a method of replacing a full-thickness cloudy cornea with a full-thickness clear cornea. The EPI-LASIT laser cutting technique was used to remove the part of the diseased corneal tissue that was corroded by sulfuric acid on my original cornea, and then a new cornea was attached to make the new and old corneas reunite and restore my vision.

During the operation, Ah Xue, who was pushing my operating cart all the way, waited outside the operating room, and the process was very fast, the surgeon first gave me a surface anesthetic with 0.5% elcaine eye solution, and then directly used the surgical instrument to prop up my eyelids and move.

The whole process takes less than 15 minutes.

But in those 15 minutes, my mind went back and forth between hell and heaven countless times.

In particular, I have thought countless times of being able to see Ah Xue's clear and transparent eyes again, and I have an inexplicable sense of comfort and anticipation, this feeling, for no reason, perhaps, is purely because I have been immersed in the dark for too long, and I want to see something bright and pure.

Ah Xue is right, if my surgery can be successful, even if I am destined to become a spurned ugly monster, but at least ...... I was also able to give the rest of my life for her, so that she could live happier and not let her suffer anymore.

Perhaps, only when the grandest dreams and ambitions come to naught will one discover the preciousness of the smallest happiness.

"Alright. The surgery was a success. Not a big problem. Fortunately, the sulfuric acid did not go deeper. The doctor in charge of my surgery let out a long breath. Hearing his words, I also secretly breathed a sigh of relief in my heart.

After waiting for another three minutes, I was put on an eye patch and sent out of the operating room, and the moment the door opened, I heard Ah Xue shouting in my ear:

"Brother...... How is my brother? Can he see it?" the voice was so anxious, and so nervous.

"Rest assured, the operation was a success. As long as the maintenance is fine, the recovery is proper. The doctor replied in a dull tone.

"Really...... That's great...... That's wonderful......" Xue's crying voice sounded again, and then I felt a warm little hand gently covering my left cheek.

"Ayuki ......"

"Brother, you will definitely get better, you will definitely get better...... Then we can be the same as before......" Ah Xue cried, and her delicate voice seemed so weak.

If I could cry at this moment, I would definitely burst into tears.

Because of the day's recuperation and first aid, my injuries have improved, so I have been retired from the ICU intensive care unit to the general ward, and Ah Xue also grabbed my operating car all the way and followed me into the general ward.

I lay back on the bed, because the effect of the anesthetic had not passed, and my articulation was not clear.

During this time, Ah Xue sat on the edge of my hospital bed, put her two hands on my body, gently stroked the back of my hand, and kept asking me "how do you feel" and "are you feeling better". I also comforted myself and repeatedly said that I would definitely get better, and I would definitely do stupid things like that.

I don't know why, after I had the operation, Ah Xue's uneasiness became more and more intense, and she began to chatter, and even her voice was constantly shaking. I asked her several times if it was cold or what, but Ah Xue insisted that it was okay, and for several hours, Ah Xue sat beside me all the time, not moving an inch, as if she had taken root.

Ah Xue's behavior made my heart heavier and heavier.

A somewhat worrying thought began to wander through my mind:

Is it possible, Ah Xue...... Gave me her cornea?

Such a terrible and crazy thought flashed through my mind, and even with it, I couldn't help but open my mouth:

"Xue, get me a glass of water. I said tentatively.

"Oh...... Okay, wait a minute. Xue replied weakly. Then I heard the sound of Ah Xue getting up and walking, and after a while, I heard the sound of pouring water, and then, the edge of the cold glass was attached to my hand, which was the cold water that Ah Xue gave me.

I felt the coolness in my hands, but my heart relaxed a lot.

It seems that I am thinking too much...... How could Ah Xue give me the cornea. If it was given to me, how could she serve me tea and water like a normal person?

I laughed to myself, shook my head, took the teacup from Ah Xue's hand, and then took a sip to moisten my throat.

[8500 words, such a number of words should be stamped with flowers is not too much, right?