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There's a bunch of bastards who are so brazen as to treat my house as his own, and it's impossible for Liu Yuan to stop tonight.

Originally, it was a good choice to sneak away to Wenxianglou for the night, and now the boss has been replaced by Tulip and Flower Demon Niang, and Diao Xiaosi himself still accounts for most of the shares.

It's a pity that after the New Year, I will marry Zisu, and then go to the Qinglou at this time, it seems a little too ostentatious, maybe Sun Qianjin will refine him into Cordyceps sinensis when he is angry.

Diao Xiaosi thought about it and felt that he should have a good chat with the god who claimed to be a heavenly immortal as soon as possible.

Who knew that in his expectation, at most, he would only need to have a good time to catch the wind and wash the dust, and the banquet would not be eaten until midnight. There's no way, the battle of the Daotian of the Enlightenment Hall that happened in the Emei Golden Dome Buddha Realm a few days ago was too sensational, and everyone wanted to know the details.

It is rare that Donald Taijun also has a humble heart to ask for advice from others, Diao Xiaosi naturally has to shake his spirit, know everything, and say everything endlessly, and tell the ins and outs of the matter once or two or three times, which is inevitably added to the vinegar and boasts.

In fact, although it had only been a few days, the various sects of the two realms of the righteous and demonic realms had already known about this matter through their respective channels. As early as the battle of Liyangcang, the Jinding Divine Monk had torn his face with the Longhu Mountain Zhengyi Sect, and now it broke the news that he assassinated the Yuding Master Yuanshen and replaced him, and it was even more indignant that the people and gods had become the public enemy of the righteous path.

In particular, Princess Jincheng invited the Jinding monk to fight on Longmen Gorge in order to take revenge, which added more and more color to this story.

Speaking of Princess Jincheng, Li Yifeng was curious: "Brother, why didn't she come back with you?"

Diao Xiaosi said with a smile: "She likes to be quiet, and as soon as she returned to Chang'an, she found a good place to retreat and cultivate, and she didn't see anyone except Lao Tzu." ”

Tang Xueshang snorted and said, "That's what the toad said too. ”

Diao Xiaosi saw that she didn't believe it, and said hesitantly: "What if Lao Tzu finds her?"

Tang Xueshang said disapprerovingly: "Even if you don't look for her, we can see her on the first day of the first lunar month." If you really have the ability, let Princess Jincheng respectfully hold a cup of tea for her aunt and grandmother in front of everyone, and call 'second sister', and I will really obey you." ”

Diao Xiaosi suddenly lost his voice. Among the three wives he personally circled, if you ask which one you like the most, you may not be able to say clearly, but the most feared must be the princess and little lady.

Give tea to the second grandmother, this kind of thing can be changed to perilla, and you can do it without bothering yourself. Although Wan'er is more difficult to do, it is probably no problem to stalk and coerce and lure. But if it's Princess Jincheng-

Diao Xiaosi shuddered, his head was numb and his buttocks hurt like a conditioned reflex, and his skin all over his body was itchy.

Seeing that he looked like a frosted eggplant, Tang Xuesheng raised her eyebrows and said, "Sure enough, you just talk about it, and you don't dare to do it with others." ”

The green tendons on Diao Xiaosi's head jumped suddenly, and he slapped the table and said: "Joke, is there a woman in this world who can't do what Lao Tzu can't do?

"If you can really do it...... Tang Xueshang glanced at Diao Xiaosi's hair, which was as short as a brush, and said, "I'll shave my hair!"

"Okay, let's just say it, tomorrow Lao Tzu will go to her!"

"What if you lose?"

"I'm not going to lose. Diao Xiaosi replied confidently, and secretly added a sentence in his heart: "In case of losing, Lao Tzu can always come up with seventy, eighty or ninety methods, and it's a big deal to shave his head again." ”

Tang Xuesheng was not fooled, and said with a smile: "If you lose, every time you see me in the future, you have to immediately run over and kneel on the ground, and then say, 'Grandma is auspicious, and the slave Xiaosi'er is here for you'." ”

"Goo......" Li Jing finally swallowed a mouthful of tea in his mouth, and looked at Diao Xiaosi with pity, obviously not optimistic about him.

Li Yifeng and Murong Xiaobai, you look at me, I look at you, and silently raise the wine glass to cover your face. secretly prayed that Diao Xiaosi could be more, and maybe he could avoid the catastrophe of bowing to the tough second wife.

Concubine Tang Fan said with great interest: "Okay, I'll be the referee, whoever dares to play Lai Lao Niang will reward him with a kick!

Diao Xiaosi smirked on his face, screaming in his heart, thinking that he had to ask Father Ning to pass on his "full house of children and grandchildren" no matter what, which also made Old Taijun Tang lose convincingly.

After the banquet dispersed, he returned to his room half drunk and half conscious, closed the door and sat on the bed, took out the string of small bells that Cheng Tieniu gave him from the belt of the dragon, and shook it with a jingling sound, while chanting in his mouth: "The gate of heaven is open, the door of the earth is open, you haba come quickly!"

"Uh-" just read the third time, the space in the room suddenly shook, like glass burst open a crack, from the inside "click, click" burst out of the round and violent thunder, Cheng Tieniu mouthed a pacifier, waist around the belly pocket, dragged half of the diaper behind the buttocks, still holding a rattle in his hand, after hitting the void, his head jumped out of the murderous left and right, and shouted inarticulately: "Old bald donkey, where are you fleeing?

I saw that all the furniture in the room turned into a pile of black charcoal in an instant, Diao Xiaosi shrank in the corner, a roasted potato that was charred on the outside and tender on the inside, and kept smoking out, and was glaring at him angrily with the string of bells in his hand.

If it were someone else, most of them would apologize for their reckless and rude behavior, but Cheng Tieniu would never think so.

His eyes searched around the room and found no trace of the Jinding Divine Monk, turned his head to Diao Xiaosi and glared angrily: "Your mother, give me an explanation first!"

"Explain, right?" Diao Xiaosi suddenly rushed forward, grabbed Cheng Tieniu and pressed him on his thigh, picked up his slap and crackled his snow-white and pink little buttocks, and beat him fiercely: "Wait until I hit your ass first!"

Cheng Tieniu was blinded, since the beginning of the world, when has Da Luo Jinxian ever been spanked? Could it be that the years have been long and handsome, and the nether realm has been a god who will rush to the street, and the fairy has begged for a collection and changed the world?

At the moment when he was depressed, Diao Xiaosi viciously grabbed his fat neck and carried it in front of him, and said: "There is a debtor who is wronged, and there are birdmen in the country-remember who hurt you so badly? Brother, the opportunity for revenge has come!"

Cheng Tieniu's eyes lit up suddenly, and he immediately threw the idea of finding Diao Xiaosi to settle accounts outside the Nantian Gate, and hurriedly asked, "Do you know where that old bald donkey is?"

Diao Xiaosi smiled without saying a word, put down Cheng Tieniu slowly, and put a hand under his nose.

Cheng Tieniu was stunned, confused and said, "What do you mean?"

"You know what is most valuable in this world—intelligence. With intelligence, Xiang Yu will not be able to play the Hongmen banquet, and Zhuge Liang will not be able to sing the empty city plan; with information, I will be able to know which local tyrant is the richest and whose girl wants to get out of the cabinet; with information, you can immediately ascend to heaven ......"

"Your mother, dare to knock on Lao Tzu's bamboo pole!"

"How can you say that it is a rip-off, it is Lao Tzu who exchanged his life for it. Seeing Cheng Tieniu's anger, Diao Xiaosi said confidently: "Think about it, as long as you take out a little bit of your belongings, you can change to being a new person...... It's a chance to become an immortal again. It's not cost-effective, you can do it yourself! But it's okay, Lao Tzu won't wait for it to be outdated!"

"Phew! When Lao Tzu went down to earth, he was out of the house, where did he get his belongings?"

"You baba! dare to love that you are not a god, you are a bachelor!"

The old bald donkey is a key criminal wanted by the Heavenly Court, and if you can help me to correct him, it will be a great merit. ”

"How much money is a pound of merit, can it be eaten as food?"

"You don't understand this, do you? Although merit cannot be eaten as food, it can be exchanged for heavenly rewards. If you're lucky, you might be able to change a fairy as your wife. ”

"Really?" Diao Xiaosi's heart was moved, remembering the story of Dong Yong and the Seven Fairies.

"I'm a fairy, can I lie to you? When the time comes, just write your wish on the rune paper and burn it, just wait for the fairy to come to the door!"

- Fairy? It seems good, it would be nice if there was something more affordable.

Diao Xiaosi was thoughtful, suddenly grabbed the bell and shook it: "Dead immortal, I was almost deceived by you." If you leave the house, where did you get this thing?"

"Stupid, Lao Tzu is also a fairy, isn't it a piece of cake to refine a few magic weapons?"

As long as I shake it in my hand and shake it twice, the beauties within a radius of eight hundred miles will throw themselves into their arms desperately, crying and begging me to marry her, and if I don't agree, they will hang themselves. ”

Cheng Tieniu looked at the bell in Diao Xiaosi's hand for a moment, gritted his teeth and snatched it, used his divine power to recite the incantation, tossed it for a long time, and then handed it back, and gasped and said, "Intelligence!"

Diao Xiaosi was like a treasure, and said: "On the first day of the first month, the old thief of Jinding will make an appointment to fight Princess Jincheng in Longmen Gorge. ”

Cheng Tieniu suddenly realized: "Your mother, after making trouble for a long time, it was Laben Daxian who went to be a thug." ”

Diao Xiaosi smiled and said: "Everyone is responsible for Tianxingdao, how can I be embarrassed to swallow such a great good thing with immeasurable merits?"

"What do you mean......"

You look at me, I look at you, an old god, a little villain, in the little dark room let out a creepy smug laugh.

The plan has been decided, Cheng Tieniu was worried about going home to drink milk, and tore the void with his bare hands and slipped in.

Diao Xiaosi waited until he was gone, and then remembered that he hadn't asked Cheng Tieniu to compensate for the loss in the house, but fortunately, he had made a string of bells, and he didn't know if it was good or not.

He picked up the bell and tried to shake it, the sound of "jingling" fluttering in the wind in the still night, and he looked out expectantly.

After a while, I saw a beautiful woman with no eyes rushing over like a lightning speed, "Bang Dang" kicked open the door and stepped into the house, and couldn't help but pick up the big stick and slam Diao Xiaosi's head and face.

"Gua Wazi, my aunt and grandmother let you stay awake in the middle of the night, and you didn't ring the bell in the middle of the night!"