Half an hour later.

Jiang Zimu slumped on the sofa on his back, stroked his slightly bulging belly from time to time, and gently burped, saving a little food in his heart.

The so-called eating gas is actually the same as getting up gas. Jiang Zimu ate too fast at first, like a whirlwind, and couldn't taste the true taste carefully at all, but now everything is eaten, but the taste buds are still unsatisfied, but the stomach is already full, and he really can't stuff more food. This kind of self-contradiction combined with the principle of diminishing marginal effect has caused Jiang Zimu to look at Xiao Li even more unpleasantly now.

"Hey, Xiao Da idol, it's ten o'clock in the evening now, okay?"

How long will you be old?

Xiao Lizao, who was stubbornly sitting in the open space with a sofa bean bag, blinked calmly when he heard this, "Oh, I was about to come just now, but seeing that you ate so deliciously, I didn't dare to disturb you, so I didn't say anything." ”

"It's not too late to tell. ”

"Now ......" Xiao Lizao frowned, took out the peak acting skills of punching Al Pacino and kicking Daniel Dai Lewis, raised his hand to the top of his forehead but did not touch it, his neck was crooked, and he sighed helplessly and restrainedly, "I don't know if it is too much blood loss, now, I feel that my eyes are full of gold stars, and I am dizzy." ”

Jiang Zimu didn't bother to take care of it, and turned his head as if he was going to take a nap for a while. After less than ten minutes of silence, he stood up coldly and pointed behind Xiao Lizao, "Snake!

Xiao Li was a thriller earlier, his hair was so frightened that he didn't say goodbye, he jumped fast and high, both speed and strength could exceed the limits of the human body, and he felt that it was really tyrannical to not let him participate in the Olympics to win glory for the country.

"Where, where?"

Jiang Zimu pursed his lips, and his eyes fluttered towards Xiao Lizao's head, "Dear, are you still dizzy?"

Xiao Lizao's eyes darkened, and he crossed his waist and didn't answer for a long time.

"What's the matter? scared stupid?" Jiang Zimu was only halfway through his words, when he heard an irritating doorbell.

"Hello, Census. ”

Jiang Zimu turned sideways and climbed onto the back of the sofa, drumming a little in his heart: What are you doing? Go to the door at 10 o'clock in the evening to do the survey and register? Is this overly optimistic about the estimation of the biological clock of most people?

"Hello, is it convenient?"

"Come on...... Here it comes. Jiang Zimu was very helpless to have an eye contact with Xiao Lizao, the corners of his mouth twitched, and he muttered in a low voice: "If you still refuse to move, then please cover your face." Big night, don't be a demon for me anymore. ”

"Cut. Xiao Lizao raised his jaw and flew to the entrance with a wide eye.

"It's coming, it's coming. Jiang Zimu lazily walked to the door, looked through the cat's eyes, and after seeing that there was nothing unusual, he removed the door lock from three times and five by two, and as soon as the door was opened, he saw a simple eldest sister standing at the door very kindly.

"Hello, yes...... Census?" Jiang Zimu had just eaten enough, and his drowsy brain wanted to strike a little. "This ...... What time?"

"Hello, I am the census taker in our region, and my surname is Sun. ”

"Sorry to interrupt. Some time ago, we have already registered our community from house to house. But there was no one at home at the time, so I missed it. ”

"Oh, oh, Sun... Hello Sister Sun. What do you need from my side to cooperate?"

Sister Sun raised her eyebrows and smiled, and took out a document from her purse, "Please take a general look at this "Confidentiality Commitment" and sign it." I'll ask a few questions later, don't worry, we'll protect citizens' privacy in accordance with the law. ”

"Okay. Jiang Zimu responded while canceling the lock of the outer door, pushed it slightly, and was about to receive the document, but before his brain could react, he had been dragged by Sister Sun and tightly protected in his arms.

"Don't move! Don't move!"

Jiang Zimu's ears trembled, and only then did he realize that there were seven or eight policemen hiding next to Sister Sun.

"Little girl, don't be afraid. We are from the nearby police station. ”

How?

"Pie...... The police station?"

Jiang Zimu twisted his face, and he already found that Xiao Li had already been pressed by someone, his face was close to the ground, and he couldn't move. I know with my toes that Xiao Lizao's live appearance must be the pinnacle of his entertainment career, and the screenshot is a popular emoji that has reached the top of the hot search and bloodbathed station D.

The picture is too bloody, causing extreme comfort, how can it be broken?

"It's ...... What's going on?"

Xiao Lizao: Heart attack, shutdown and restart.

Five minutes later.

After the document review, Xiao Lizao and Jiang Zi sat in a row on the two bean bags in the middle of the living room, and obediently put their hands on their knees like children, staring at the policeman Shu Huang and the police aunts who were sitting on the two sofas next to him with a serious face.

Xiao Li tilted his head early, looked in front of him, and then glanced at Jiang Zimu with his spare eyes, his mind was blank, and he just asked himself: Who am I, where am I, what am I doing?

"Xiao Lizao?" said Sister Sun's expression of motherly love, "My daughter likes you very much." ”

My daughter has a good eye, and next time she is crazy at home, she will howl "Mom, I want to marry him", and my mother will definitely give you an encouraging hug to support you in your brave pursuit of love.

"But," Sister Sun took her eyes off Xiao Lizao's face with difficulty, and instead looked at Jiang Zimu on the side, feeling that support is support, and her daughter should have the heart to chase stars but have no power to return to the sky.

Indeed, at this time, the two good-looking faces in front of him, coupled with the wonderful magnetic field that cannot be seen or touched but interacts with each other, is not the only one who makes Xiao Lizao and Jiang Zimu into CP.

Xiao Lizao nodded, cautiously raised his hand and patted it on the top of his head.

A policeman next to Sister Sun, Shu Xiao, coughed, "Two, that's the case - we received a report call, saying that there is a vicious case of burglary here, let's send someone over to ensure the personal safety of the homeowner." ”

Jiang Zimu was stunned for a moment, swallowed his saliva, raised his fingers, and pointed to Xiao Lizao's nose, "Enter the room...... Murder?"

"Hehe, police officer Shu Huang, there's no matter, where does this start?"

"Those bloodstains, what's going on?"

Xiao Lizao grinned, looked at the blood-stained tissues on the table that he hadn't had time to clean up, and felt that his brain hurt very much, "I was attacked at the performance site before, and I had a wound on my head, and I accidentally bumped it just now, and the wound collapsed." ”

Sister Sun still smiled calmly, "It's so late, why are you here?"

"Business!"

Xiao Lizao and Jiang Zimu showed an unprecedented tacit understanding, and swallowed this proposition in unison.

"Sister Sun, that's the case, Mr. Xiao Lizao and I have a purely simple employment relationship. Jiang Zimu froze and nodded at the contract on the table.

In view of Mr. Xiao's grand willingness to deeply develop the Middle East market, as one of the few universities in China to carry out Arabic language teaching, Nanshi F University is undoubtedly the most authoritative and powerful, and I, as the most outstanding graduate of the Arabic language department of F University, naturally received the olive branch from Ms. Gu. ”

"It is a great honor to be Mr. Xiao's full-time Arabic tutor. ”

Xiao Lizao listened to Jiang Zimu's gentle statement tone and the official wording to the point, and couldn't help but snort, saying in his heart You are a goddess, and there are several faces, this rhetoric can be directly pushed out to make a speech on foreign affairs.

Jiang Zimu was keenly aware of Xiao Lizao's eyes, slowly looked sideways, nodded arrogantly and with a sense of distance in response, and then put on his trademark professional smirk, and continued to explain: "If a few of you are suspicious of my qualifications and don't trust my qualifications, I can provide the contact information of several well-known professors of Arabic at F University for your reference and confirmation." ”

The policeman Shu Huang calmly flipped through the employment contract, and ate it with Jiang Zimu's words, feeling that there was nothing wrong with it at all.

It's just that Sister Sun, in line with the professionalism of breaking the casserole and asking the end, slightly indulged her gossip soul.

"To send a contract, you don't have to be such a famous big star to do it yourself, right?

Jiang Zimu smiled, "Actually, I won't hide it from you, Sister Sun-the reason why I accept this job, in addition to the generous salary, the most important thing is the student." After a pause, Jiang Zimu clenched his fists with both hands and lifted his cheeks, "The teaching object is the famous Xiao Lizao! Looking at all the female creatures that exist on the surface, are there any fans of Xiao Lizao?"

"Look at it, look at this ......" Jiang Zimu carefully interpreted the fancy crying of the rice ring, his face bulging like a chipmunk, and the rainbow farts floating out, "This makes the skin of mosquitoes slippery, and makes the world become a luminous beauty of eternal daylight, which is like Pangu opening the world to create a new era of beauty and prosperity......"

A crowd of onlookers: Now the little girl is chasing stars and cults, right? Bart, it's really cute and lovely~

Xiao Li had already looked at Jiang Zimu's nymphomaniac, and couldn't help but sigh in his heart: Hey, false artificiality, wood's soul. With this kind of acting, you can't grab a hot box lunch when you go to Hengdian as a group performer, okay?