In the first two days after returning to Xiangcheng, Jiang Zimu had a bad life.

First, the foster pet has not been close to the owner for too long, and as soon as he takes it home, he has a temper, and when he feeds it, he bites Jiang Zimu and does not say anything, and he secretly "escapes" while people are not prepared.

The second is that the community has just begun to classify garbage, and the enthusiastic aunts of the neighborhood committee are famous for their teachers, and you push me to grab the head and rush to the door, saying that they want to popularize the knowledge of garbage classification for Jiang Zimu and the corresponding measures carried out by the community on the new deal. "Xiao Jiang, this is a recent photo of my nephew, look, is it a handsome and chic?" "Xiao Jiang, let's add a WeChat to each other, my sister's daughter-in-law's cousin's second son is the same age as you, when the time comes, I will pull a group for you, and you two will definitely be able to talk." ”

......

Jiang Zimu is dealing with the warmth of the community and the red line army, while rummaging through the cabinets at home, desperately trying to find the traces of his pet from a corner, a few days later, not to mention the rest and rest of the jet lag to resume the factory settings before the trip, and even a serious lunch break can not be fished.

"Hey, go away you goddamn popularity!

"I didn't go to the community square to lead the dance before I knew it. ”

"People love flowers when they see flowers, and they blame me when they see flowers blooming? Is it my fault that I especially like the elderly?"

"Well, by the way, the meat bun that I took a bite of accidentally fell to the ground and happened to be stained with the nail polish that I just turned over, what kind of garbage is this?"

On Sunday, after Jiang Zimu received three matchmakers in succession early in the morning, he finally couldn't bear it anymore, took out the courage to send sheep into the tiger's mouth and never returned, tied a ponytail, stepped on his shoes, and ran to the neighborhood committee office with a menacing head.

In front of the director of the neighborhood committee and the property manager, Jiang Zimu didn't say much, with one mouth, like pouring beans into a bamboo tube, he memorized the official definitions, treatment methods, and main types of garbage fluently and fluently, and then glanced at the aunts gathered in the house with a smile on his face, and said pitifully: "I... I...... Garbage classification, benefiting the country and the people, starting from me, is duty-bound. ”

"That, Aunt Zhang, Aunt Ji, Aunt Liu, Aunt Zhao, don't bother you to run to my house all the time, I remember all the relevant knowledge, don't worry, you will never make a mistake." ”

The aunts were stunned for a moment, first staring at each other, and after reacting, they surrounded them with a smile, holding hands and holding arms, hugging arms, and their mouths were not idle.

Sure enough, the ginger is still old and spicy, and the skin is still old and thick.

The estimate of the enemy situation is too insufficient.

"I'm afraid I'm going to be here today. ”

I really regret not being at the beginning, crying bitterly .jpg.

Listening to all kinds of chatter and chatter in his ears, Jiang Zimu sighed and shed tears of discouragement, "I finally stopped for a while, why did you start introducing me to someone again? With your addiction to being a matchmaker is cyclical, and together, you are going to carry out a circle attack on me? Can you change your old people to exceed, no, change people for benefits? I am an old happy dog life, and I have never thought about dragging my family into a new chapter in my life!"

Two hours later......

Seeing Jiang Zimu's unmoved and embarrassed and polite smile, as a human blind date outlet that punches "Lily" and "cherishes", and dominates the industry, how can there be anything that does not meet the KPI standard? But now that it has happened, it is time to fight the pot skills. No, several gold medal salesmen began to blame each other and caused infighting.

Aunt Zhang shouted angrily at Aunt Liu, her son's rival in love, "Draw the knife, Bichi." ”

Aunt Ji crossed her waist and shouted at Aunt Zhao, the mother of the most powerful contender for her godson's lifelong happiness, "Come on, I'm afraid of you!"

Where has Jiang Zimu, a young man, ever seen such a big battle? After being stunned for about 0.03 seconds, the victim Jiang had an idea, and took advantage of the fact that several social aunts in the room were focused on the king's confrontation with him, and broke free from the kidnappers with great discernment, waved his little hand, and ran away without a trace.

At less than eight o'clock that night, after successfully moving the large wardrobe by three centimeters by relying only on his own strength, Jiang Zimu panted and shook his head, and threw himself into the living room sofa with the last remaining strength, and then scolded with a big tongue and slurred, "You just hide it, don't let your aunt find it! If you find it, your aunt will peel you and stew you directly in a pot, do you believe it or not?"

While speaking, he subconsciously took out his mobile phone, and thought about it for a while, in the past few days since he came back from Jiadao, he seemed to be so busy that he didn't even care about Xiao Li's two early live variety shows. However, just before clicking into Station D to watch the video, Jiang Zimu was slightly stunned for a while, his hand shook, but he first clicked on the album and flipped through the screenshots of the previous video one by one.

"As long as you don't open your mouth and don't scare people, just sit quietly and quietly, Xiao Da Idol's appearance and temperament are still exceptionally good. ”

"But it's a pity, it's a pity, that guy, he can't live without a poisonous tongue. ”

Just thinking about it, the mobile phone shook, Jiang Zimu shuddered coldly, and found that Xiao Lizao's video call came in no sooner or later.

Forehead...... Why "again"?

"This kind of thing happens to other people, it's called 'heart and soul', and the two of us can only be regarded as 'the road of rivalry is narrow', whether it is a physical road or an Internet, it is narrow everywhere. ”

"That ......" Jiang Zimu put one hand on the door of his head, and greeted the screen in a dumb voice.

"Hi, have you eaten?"

Xiao Li pouted early, "I was quite hungry after eating a lot of gas this morning." ”

"I said Xiao Da idol, can you be sunny, don't always call me when you are full of negative energy, okay?"

Jiang Zimu subconsciously looked at Xiao Lizao through his fingers, seeing that although he was a little tired, his entire mental state was still not bad.

"Where are you, are you at home?"

"Oh. Jiang Zimu agreed casually, rolled his eyes, and immediately asked, "Could it be that something happened to you in yesterday's live broadcast?"

Say, what's going on?

Xiao Lizao's eyes lowered, but he didn't answer Jiang Zimu's question directly when he opened his mouth, rubbed his chin with his hand, and asked rhetorically with a little temper: "You haven't watched my variety show in the past two days, have you?

"Dear, it's not that I didn't watch it on purpose, I also have to have the kung fu to watch it?" Jiang Zimu sighed, spread his hands helplessly, and replied honestly: "The community aunts send warmth one by one, come to the door to popularize the knowledge of garbage classification, and then introduce me to the blue pot friends." After chatting for more than an hour, I couldn't get rid of it. When I came back from the Galapagos, I was so focused on dealing with them, I was running out of time to catch my breath, and I still had time to watch TV?"

The corners of Xiao Lizao's mouth trembled unconsciously, his nose snorted, and he began to scare people indiscriminately.

"Your community, the appearance looks like all kinds of tall people, why do the people who live in it not have a very high IQ?"

"Could it be that those mothers think that throwing the right garbage a few times can exchange points for their daughters-in-law?"

Be their spring and autumn dream!

"Cut. Jiang Zimu smiled, and said in his heart, you always have the ability to stand in the office of the neighborhood committee and repeat the sentence just now, believe it or not, any aunt can smash you to the point where you can't take care of yourself with just a spitting star?

After the first reaction, Jiang Zimu gasped coldly, and secretly regurgitated Xiao Lizao's words just now, smacking his lips, feeling a little weird.

"How do you know what it looks like outside our community?"

"Oh, high-end community, very complete, 50 floors of high-rise, green security can be. Xiao Li pinched his mobile phone and looked to the side, "According to the direction, I guess your house can still see the river view, right?"

"Poof~" Jiang Zimu stiffened with a carp, his eyes were as wide as longan, and he trotted all the way to the entrance, "You...... You... You ......"

It's impossible, it's impossible, yesterday Saturday, the evening was the live broadcast time, the goods should still be in the field, and it is impossible to teleport back to Xiangcheng in a blink of an eye. Besides, the old lady lives in a high-end community, 24-hour security, even if the doorman can't stop you, what about the downstairs access control?

"Don't be afraid, not afraid. Jiang Zimu patted his chest, he simply didn't even look at the cat's eyes, closed his eyes tightly, covered his ears and stole the bell, and put his little hand directly on the door lock.

"Huh~" The door opened, and after a minute of silence, Jiang Zimu's eyes finally opened tentatively, and what greeted her was Xiao Li's jawline that had seen the explosion earlier.

On the side of the well-known idol's head, his eyebrows were lowered, and he grinned heartlessly, "Surprise?

"Bang!

Xiao Li didn't react much earlier, holding up his mobile phone, his arms still standing up by his ears and not dropping them.

"You...... Jiang Zimu, you let me eat behind closed doors again!"

Forehead...... Why "again"?

“What the ...... I said Xiao Lizao, what are you going to do?"

Jiang Zimu leaned against the door, little Jio Jio stomped on the floor vigorously, his voice was very low, and he asked into the phone: "Video is video, why don't you come to the door without saying hello?"

"I tell you, where should I go if you give me a slippery place, do you hear? Turn back, walk in unison, the sky and the earth are big outside, and you will be home all over the world. I said you listen......"

As soon as he was halfway through the sentence, Xiao Li outside the door had already hung up the phone. Jiang Zimu leaned his ear on the door, carefully discerning the movement outside, but he could hear it, and the most energetic thing was his own heartbeat.

"5001 Jiang Zimu, open the door and check the water meter!"

"5001 Jiang Zimu, open the door to receive the express!"

Jiang Zimu jumped twice in shock by the sudden sound outside the door, raised his hands on his shoulders, and looked like a cat who was caught red-handed for stealing dried small fish.

"I'll wipe it!" The next second, Jiang Zimu's hands trembled like Parkinson's, and he was busy calling back Xiao Lizao's phone.

However, the goose was hung up once and hung once, and the shouting outside the door intensified.

"5001, 5001 guests, please open the door!"

"Jiang Zimu, is Jiang Zimu at home?"

"5001, open the door!"

"Jiang Zimu, 5001's Jiang Zimu, you have the ability to make me angry, you have the ability to open the door! Don't hide inside and keep quiet, I know you're at home!"

Jiang Zimu listened to the noise outside the door, and suddenly felt that it was extremely inhumane to block a well-known singer who was easily soaring to G5 with a high-pitched voice with a mouth and was known for his full of temperament, iron lungs and iron voice, of course, from the perspective of protecting his hearing.

"Don't howl!"

Jiang Zimu opened the door again with a dark face, rolled his eyes, and pointed out the way forward for Xiao Lizao with the tip of his chin, "Shut up, come in!"

As soon as the words came out, he looked at Xiao Lizao again, but found that he shrugged his shoulders and shook his head, not advancing but retreating, pretending to take two steps back.

“You！”

“G-e-t ！！！ I-n！！！”

Jiang Zimu's body flashed, he let go of the entrance, and then looked at Uncle Xiao, who didn't move at all with his arms on the spot.

Jiang Zimu closed his palms together, and bent over at the Bodhisattva in front of him as if worshipping the Buddha, "Can I kneel down for you?"

As soon as the words fell, Jiang Zimu swallowed his saliva, took five steps forward, grabbed Xiao Lizao's arm with both hands, and was about to use his strength to pull the person into the house, but before he could exert his strength, his hands were tight, and then he reacted, but the soles of his feet were empty: yes, Xiao Da Aidou hung out a mouthful of big white teeth, swayed and floated to the front, and then effortlessly dragged Jiang Zimu off the ground, so to speak, the guest Xiao Lizao calmly hung a hand (house) arm (child) hanging (main) piece (person) into the house in a dashing manner。