After getting off the bus, I didn't go home, but came to the place where we started again, without the reflection of the stars and the moon, the night sky seemed so gray and gloomy.

The crowd was bustling, passers-by were hurrying, and it seemed that everyone was moving forward according to their own established life trajectory. It's just that in the crowd, who will notice the boy staring at the night sky on the side of the street?

Sitting on the cold steps, my heart clenched tightly, made me feel so painful. Maybe this is not mine, there is no end to my soul here......

Before going back to school, I decided to give Lin Hui a call.

"Xiaobei, don't worry, if there is any situation, I will contact you as soon as possible. Although Lin Hui's voice was very soft, it had an irresistible power.

With Lin Hui here, what do I have to worry about?

Finally he left, leaving everything behind, without stopping at all, and never looking back. I was determined to completely discard the past that I didn't want to talk about anymore, to leave this sad city, to leave this city full of memories, to leave this city that gave birth to me and raised me, and I wanted to speed up, but the pace was so slow, so heavy.

Is it reluctant nostalgia, or is it a temporary unaccustomed? I don't know, and I don't want to know......

"Chen Yuan, can you let me be alone outside for a few days?" Chen Yuan, a classmate who shared a room with me in Student Street, sat on the bus to school, and I sent him a text message.

"Well, it's okay, then I won't be there for the next few days. "A few days ago, through a text message chat, Chen Yuan already knew about Lele, so he could understand my feelings at the moment.

Just as I was about to put my phone back in my pocket, the phone suddenly vibrated again: "Xiaobei, I'm coming to your school today, let's go out to play together at night!"

"Well, I'm not in a good mood, so let's do it next time. I politely declined, then put away my phone, quietly pressed my head to the window, and silently watched the receding scenery outside the window.

The bus crawls slowly down the rugged winding road, and as long as you climb over the hill is the school.

I got off the bus at the entrance of the old student street and didn't go back to the dormitory, but went straight to the rental house. None of the others who shared the house had returned, and the huge room was empty. After all, it had been seven days without occupancy, and the furniture in the living room was covered with a thin layer of dust, but now I had no intention of cleaning it.

When I walked into the room, I locked the door and threw myself on the bed without turning on the light.

Holding the pillow, he kept muttering Lele's name over and over again, but Lele could no longer answer me, smile at me, cry at me, and be coquettish to me......

Because of my parents at home, I still have some worries, but now that I am alone, I can finally cry freely.

I don't know how long I've been crying, I'm tired of crying, I took out the big head sticker that I took with Lele during the summer vacation from my wallet, looking at Lele's bright smile in the photo, I couldn't help but feel sad again.

The backpack still has the tea dog that I gave when I went to eat KFC with Lele last year, and the tea dog that has accompanied Lele for a whole year. Gently untied it, put it in front of my nose and smelled it, and there seemed to be a green apple fragrance unique to Lele on it.

"Beizi Pig, is this tea dog quite a match for your backpack!" Vaguely, I seemed to see Lele who was tying a tea dog to my backpack again, "Pig head, usually not by your side, if you miss me, pinch this tea dog, I will naturally know!"

I subconsciously pinched the tea dog in my hand, Lele, I miss you!

"Xiaobei, are you back?" suddenly there was a sound of footsteps outside the door, which seemed to be Yangyang. I didn't answer, just squeezed the tea dog tightly in my hand and curled up motionless on the bed.

The room was pitch black, and I couldn't see my fingers, but I didn't want to close my eyes, because as soon as I closed my eyes, I would see Lele's face covered with blood......

The next morning was a microeconomics class, and the teacher would take a roll call for each class, and I had to go out of the room despite all my reluctance.

Zhang Qi was sitting on the sofa in the living room munching bread, while Yang Yang was still brushing his teeth in the bathroom, and when he saw me coming out of the room, both of them invariably stopped the movement of their hands, and then focused their eyes on my hand wrapped in gauze.

"What's wrong with your hand?" both men were stunned.

I didn't answer, just smiled apologetically at them, then turned to open the door and ran down the stairs as fast as I could.

I cried all night, and now my eyes feel so sore that I almost squint and walk to the classroom. Because I came early, there were only a few girls in the classroom who were reading in the morning, so I walked quickly to my seat in the back row without saying hello and went straight down.

After a while, the students came one after another, and everyone gathered in groups of three or five, happily talking about all kinds of interesting things about the National Day, and I was not in the mood to listen to it at all, so I simply turned my head out of the window.

"Lele, how are you doing in the sky?" Looking at the clear blue sky, I couldn't help but think of Lele again, and tears once again slipped from the corners of my eyes, although I repeatedly told myself that men don't cry.

"Li Xiaobei, you come to answer my question!" Just when I was deep in memories and couldn't extricate myself, the teacher suddenly called my name, and I came back to my senses, hurriedly wiped a handful of tears, and stood up with my head buried.

Peanut habitually turned around and glanced at me, and then quickly turned to Xiao Lang beside him as if he had discovered a new continent: "Xiaobei seems to be crying?"

"Cut, it's none of your business, why do you care so much!" Xiao Lang pushed a handful of peanuts angrily, signaling him not to meddle in his affairs. Peanut pouted reluctantly and returned to the table.

I couldn't help but look at Xiao Lang gratefully, although he didn't notice it.

"Li Xiaobei, can you answer?" The teacher waited on the podium for a long time, but he never saw me speak, and finally became a little impatient.

"No, it won't. "I kept my head down, for fear that if I looked up, the whole class would see my embarrassed appearance.

"Sit down and listen carefully!" the teacher waved his hand helplessly and motioned for me to sit down.

......

No. 10 is Lele's first seven, I bought two white candles from the supermarket, and set up a small simple mourning hall in the corner of the room. In the photo, Lele is still smiling happily, but against the backdrop of the flickering candlelight, the smile looks unusually pale.

I'm sorry Lele, that's all I can do now.

(2010.10.11 This chapter has been revised)