After sending my parents back to my hometown, I would go home with them almost every weekend. On March 10, 2012, my mother called me to my father's bedside, and my father handed me a will written on half a slip of paper and said: "Son, you are right! Dad suffered a big loss when you didn't listen to your opinions and suggestions when you were studying, and I can't suffer such a loss again, so I decided to leave a note in case I need it, you can take it!"

I took the half of the note and wrote three clarifications on the ownership of the house: 1. I have a set of 99.78 square meters of existing housing, and the house I bought at that time was for my son, which was for his marriage, and the property belonged to my son after my death, and my three daughters did not enjoy it. 2. The loan from the bank was 40,000 yuan when the property was redeemed, and the son helped repay 20,000 yuan, and the other daughters did not repay it. 3. During my 6 years of suffering from cancer, all the medical expenses were borne by my son, and my three daughters did not bear them. In addition, my widow's living and medical expenses are still borne by my son...... His name and date: March 10, 2012. My mother wrote her name and the words "obey the above opinions" on the side, although the illness tormented his body, but it did not affect his clear thinking in the slightest, although it was said that it was a will, but I felt that it was my parents' affirmation and recognition of me.

As the cancer cells continued to spread, he also began to lose weight day by day, "Cancer is actually painful to death in the end, your uncle was in pain and wanted to be electrocuted to death, and we stopped him." He seemed to have a premonition of his doomsday pain, "However, I am already very content, you and your daughter-in-law are very filial, and you have spent a lot of energy and price for your father." ”。 He also seemed to feel that his time was getting less and less, and his mood couldn't help but be complicated, thinking of the teachings he had taught me step by step, the example of words and deeds, sitting on the edge of his bed, I could no longer hold back the tears in my eyes: "Dad, these are all you deserve, my son has known since he was a child that you are very filial to my grandmother and grandmother...... Dad, son hopes that you can know that your son has really tried his best, son, I have written an article for you "Behind the Happiness", I will let you live in our hearts forever, I will ask the next generation to read this article once a year!".

In order to have more time to accompany him and accompany him to the last journey of his life, starting from the Qingming Festival in 2012, after I arranged to settle down at work, I have been with him in my hometown for a long time to stay in the hospital, I hope to spend more time with him to repay his nurturing teachings, and he has been persuading me to return to Kunshan:" Son, go back, there are still two companies to deal with, two children to take care of, what is there on Dad's side, what is the situation to call you again, you can rush back to your hometown in time!".

I looked at him again with tears in my eyes and said, "Dad, now I don't want my son to earn $10,000 a day, I just want to accompany you, accompany you!" I saw his slightly trembling lips and the tears that came out of his eyes before he had time to hide them, and then he slowly lowered his head and nodded vigorously, I think we all understand what it means, the greatest pain in life is life and death.

Perhaps knowing that his time was running out, he began to ask me about taking care of the aftermath: "Son, don't buy such a luxurious cemetery, you will be old in a few decades, and there will be no point at all! The portrait will help me choose a better kind and easy-going one, and show it to myself when I get it done, I don't want to wear that kind of old man's clothes when I leave, I want to wear a suit and leather shoes? After I leave, according to the rules of the family, you have to rush back to your hometown in the countryside to your uncle. Uncles report the news, remember, you have to kneel on one leg in front of the elder's door to report the news! , I couldn't cry and lowered my head and nodded vigorously, let the tears drip down my pants like threads, I bought the best and biggest in the local cemetery without telling him, the portrait I chose to sit on the threshold of the villa and hold the granddaughter with his surname The happiest one, I went to the suit store to buy him a full suit and leather shoes and shirts, and when he insisted on taking a look, my tear ducts blurred my eyes again.......

At noon on the weekend before the Qingming Festival at home in Kunshan, I was drunk and said my heart to her third brother-in-law, who was drinking with me: "I swear, before my father closes his eyes and leaves, if my father-in-law does not go to visit him in his hometown, I will return it to him in the future!" Although the third brother-in-law is a plumber with little education, but he appreciates me very much, when my father-in-law reluctantly sold the house to us, he ignored it, but it has always been her third brother-in-law to help me decorate the plumber and electricity, so much yellow sand, cement, etc., he picked from the first floor to the sixth floor of the interior, never said anything to me, Later, when my conditions were good, I often invited him to his house to drink and chat like a friend, and on his 60th birthday, I prepared two bottles of good wine for his birthday. Drunk, I said to the third brother-in-law with tears in my eyes: "My father has always taught me like this: son, don't take what you give to others to heart, but you must always remember what others have helped you! This is also the reason why I have never forgotten the kindness of your brother-in-law......", the third brother-in-law was very surprised that his father-in-law did not visit his in-laws who gave up treatment, and that night he had dinner at his uncle's house with other elders, and it is said that he took advantage of the noon wine to bring this matter to the table to criticize his eldest brother (my father-in-law).

Two dumb sisters have been in their hometown, plus after the Qingming Festival, I have been accompanying my father to be hospitalized in the hospital, and the pressure on my mother is much less, she has been taking care of her father in Shanghai for so long, even if we discuss asking a nurse to replace her, she still refuses, after all, the relationship between the two of them growing up together is long-lasting, after all, in order to give birth to my big fat son, he still did not dislike her who had stopped menstruating at the age of 28, even at the peak of his career, there was never any scandal about his life style, and even my wife once praised his father-in-law in private: "Your dad is really good, so great!".

On May 19, 2012, my father-in-law called me and said that he had arrived at the bus station in our hometown, maybe his brother-in-law had already received the weighing, and he still decided to visit the in-laws he had despised and disdained. Your body is not very good, your blood pressure is still high, and people with high blood pressure cannot be excited and fluctuate, it is best for you to maintain a peaceful and stable mood for yourself, and let them decide for themselves what happens to young people!", I don't know if the person sitting on the opposite side of the hospital bed comes to the stool like a child, and a strong "Mmmmmm......" 's father-in-law understood Dad's words, did he hear what he meant, Dad made eye contact with me when he finished speaking, I have seen from his thin eyes: I heard and witnessed the first and second fights between Weng and son-in-law, which parent will be uncomfortable, Dad He is teaching and educating his father-in-law, all this is so natural, not so abrupt and sharp, people who don't know the ins and outs of it simply think that the in-laws are caring for each other! It wasn't until the Spring Festival after my father left that my father-in-law said in front of me and other elders at the same table: "My in-laws are really a good person, but unfortunately the blessing is not good, hey......!"

After sending my father-in-law away the next day, I and my eldest sister Zhao Juqin spent the night in the hospital, on May 21, the dawn was relatively early, he was tortured by the pain and couldn't sleep, and sat on the bed early in a daze, and I slept on an empty hospital bed next door, seeing that he was in unbearable pain, I was also sleepy, so I sat up cross-legged and chatted with him across the bed, in the process of chatting, I secretly turned on the mobile phone video recording function, across a bed and sat cross-legged on the leg of the diagonal to shoot at him, I wanted to leave as much precious clip as possible, he slowly opened the conversation folder, and then he leftWhen I didn't have time to see my daughter-in-law sitting next to the coffin, I opened this video, and her tears fell like a thread that I had never seen before, crying silently, this is the last life counseling my father gave me, and it was also my last lesson:" Son, you are also 36 years old, you have children and daughters and a happy family, you can't be contaminated with the bad habits of flowers and plants outside, live a good life, the hardest and most tiring days have passed, be kind to your daughter-in-law, don't always be so fierce to her at work, the economic power in the family is in her hands, she gave birth to a son and a daughter for you, if you don't let her take care of anything, what's the point of her living?! 10,000 or 20,000 yuan, you let her spend it, if she involves a large amount of more than 100,000 yuan without consulting you in advance, it is not too late for you to manage the money! For my father-in-law, I pay 30,000 yuan every time I see a doctor, she has never complained a word, I don't think this child will be the kind of person who spends money indiscriminately, there is no problem; the education of the two children should be done well, not only the academic performance but also the character and moral character, but unfortunately I am sick, otherwise my grandson's grades will definitely be able to improve, and my parents can't stand you, hey...... If something unpleasant happens to your father-in-law, let it all pass, he will always be your father-in-law and elders, and you should respect him as you always respect your own parents. When I heard this video again when I sat next to her, I looked at him in the coffin with unusually firm eyes, and silently said to him in my heart: Father, I will do it, I have always taken you as an example!

When our father and son finished chatting these words, my mother also rushed to the hospital with the porridge brought from home, and the dumb eldest sister Zhao Juqin also got up, busy cleaning up and preparing for breakfast, just as our family was about to finish eating, my uncle and aunt also rushed to the hospital early in the morning to visit his brother. After breakfast, my father deliberately cleared his throat and coughed, and I knew what he was going to say at a glance, so I brought a bench to my father's bedside and beckoned my uncle to sit down, while my aunt sat on the empty bed next door. My mom and I sat on the bench that we used to accompany the patient.

"Ball, do you know how you got to where you are today?", Dad called out his uncle's nickname and opened the conversation clip.

"Okay wow, what's the point of saying this, it's fun, isn't it?", as soon as my dad spoke, the aunt sitting next to him was about to interrupt him. My father also told me when he was seeing a doctor in Shanghai before: every time I open my mouth, my aunt will cut it off, because she told your uncle that it was my aunt and her brother-in-law, and the accountant of the production team helped your uncle, and then bought all kinds of gifts every year to give her brother-in-law New Year's greetings and festivals, so I have never had a chance to tell your uncle, Dad, I really don't want your uncle's gifts and returns. (The festival refers to an important festival every year, and it is a local custom for juniors to visit their elders.) ）

"Auntie, you shut up for me and listen well, my dad is already like this, I don't want him to leave with any regrets!", maybe I felt deeply with my father, I actually unscrupulously interrupted my aunt's words rudely, my shocking words, in addition to all the people present holding their breath, I also saw my father's approving eyes.

"When you graduated from junior high school, you had nothing to do, and you were empty at home, I heard from the old secretary general in the township that there was going to be a training course for private teachers in the red teacher class, and after receiving and recruiting some young people with a little cultural foundation for retraining, cultural poverty alleviation education, and soon after taking up the post, they turned into private teachers. He continued, "I tried to keep an eye on the old secretary-general, invited him to drink and eat, grind and soak hard, and inserted you into the training class if you were not qualified in age, so the old secretary-general would ask my brother every year for some new rice, waterfowl specialties or something, brother, I have never told you!".

"Ah, that's not what I know!", the uncle, who was listening to his father with bated breath, turned his head to stare at the embarrassed aunt, and suddenly realized as if he had just woken up from a dream: "I'm sorry, brother, I really didn't know you were helping me!".

"Then after graduating from the training class, I first let you go to the village primary school of the Zhoushe brigade to be a private substitute teacher, and then I tried to ask the old secretary to help you transfer you to the village primary school closer to the door of the brigade as a private teacher, and when you turned over, you were already a formal private teacher, in 1985, I heard that there was a group of private teachers in the township to transfer the quota of public teachers, and I tried my best to find the old secretary general to help, prepared a variety of good dishes to invite him to eat at home, and finally he asked to move all these good dishes to his house to eat...... Once and twice until I promised him to take care of at least 200 catties of new rice and agricultural and sideline products every year, I drank him until he got drunk and came back, and he finally agreed to leave an indicator for my brother, and that day I vomited everywhere as soon as I entered the house, but my heart was so happy! My brother can finally have an iron rice bowl!", he poured it like sesame seeds, refreshing and continuous, and the uncle sitting on the stool next to the bed could no longer hold back, "Woo, woo, woo......" He cried out like a child, while the aunt sitting on the edge of the bed bowed her head in shame and was silent.

"After transferring to a public teacher, I continued to find a way to transfer you to the town center primary school, found the leader and found Principal Chen Xiaogeng, and Principal Chen also gave me face, and you were transferred to the town center primary school in half a year. He didn't care that there was another party (aunt) sitting next to him, for fear that someone would not let him say the same thing again, and wanted to quickly tell him all the details and experiences of his younger brother, "In the second year of being transferred to the town, I bought two boxes of Hongtashan cigarettes to go to the cadres and school branch meetings in the public relations township, and agreed to let you join the party and promote you, step by step until you were promoted to the position of the school's teaching director." My brother and sister-in-law have never asked you for a penny, have they? I just want to make my brother's life better and better, so that all the brothers in our family will be better!"

"Woooooooooo......oo My good brother, it's all my brother, I'm not good, it's all my bad!" said the uncle, who seemed to wake up from a dream, confessed to his father.

"Okay, okay, brother, I accept your apology, don't cry, these words have been in my heart for many years, what I want to say today is finally all said, my heart is much more comfortable, brother, brother told you this today, I hope you can be a person who understands, knows how to repay, and knows how to be grateful is the minimum requirement, but you have to thank the right person! Principal Chen was so helpful to you, so good to you, and trusted you so much, but you spread those rumors outside that had no factual basis and were extremely unfavorable to Principal Chen, which was really not on the stage! Are you worthy of Principal Chen?"

"Brother, those things that are not good for Chen Xiaoxiao are not what I said, I was told by ***!", he is still making senseless justifications and denials in front of this dying man like a child.

"Uncle, that also came out of your mouth! Understand?! Your mouth is unstable, and Chen Xiao's potential enemy deliberately used your mouth to deliberately spread things that were unfavorable to him, and then spread out through your "trumpet," and then you were framed and used as a gunman by others, and it was difficult to argue with your mouth! Can you say that you still can't see the problems inside?" , Seeing that he was still arguing with his critically ill father, and his father was already very difficult to talk about these things, and he seemed to be endless.

"Oh, I think it makes sense to hear my nephew say that!", he seemed to find the stairs down, smug.

In fact, uncle's personality is too different from his father, it can be said that a day and a place, he is a guy who always likes to take advantage of small advantages, selfishness, maybe as a junior I say this about him, it seems that he shouldn't, but what he does really can't be called bright, the nephews and nieces in this family have never been willing to borrow money for school; , 4,000 yuan pension, uncle is a school cadre, that will not be retired, dad found him many times to discuss with him: "fifth, the two of us have economic income and sources, every year at the end of the year, our brothers help the two brothers above, each of them take out 600 yuan a year to let the two brothers who are farmers buy a dress or buy some New Year's goods or something during ......the New Year."

My father later told me: "I asked him at least three or four times, he didn't say a fart, there was no way for me to come alone, I gave 300 yuan a year to each uncle, this is my affection for my brother, there are some things that money can't buy, as long as I live I will always give ......." I got this later: in 2018, when I went back to my hometown to visit the 81-year-old second uncle who was paralyzed in bed after a stroke, he was excited to scold him for not being a thing when he talked about his uncle (the fifth child), and when he returned to the village, he only came to visit the second uncle, even if he talked to him, I asked him on the side: Is your fourth brother (my father) okay? The second uncle, who was lying on the bed and couldn't move, immediately burst into tears: "The fourth brother is good, but my fourth brother is gone, no, my good brother......" , and then the old tears couldn't stop twitching...... When my uncle first got married, my aunt always quarreled with my grandmother and got angry, and he cheekily said to my father: "Brother, mom should go with you, mom and your brother and daughter-in-law won't come!" That's it, grandma has been living with us, grandma's maiden relatives and these grandchildren come to grandma for the New Year, every year all are dad volunteer hospitality, never care, and grandma is also very happy with this four daughters-in-law (mother) who grew up watching from a young age, my mother never quarrels with my grandma, my mother told me:" When your grandmother gave birth to your little uncle, she was hospitalized in the hospital, there was nothing to eat at home, your uncle was hungry and cried, your grandmother was in charge of cooking in the canteen in the production team of the brigade, I was 10 years older than your uncle, so I asked your grandmother to make some porridge and soup to feed your uncle, and your grandmother always asked me to come back and continue to fight after I finished drinking!".

A few years ago, when I went home to pay New Year's greetings to the elders, my third aunt took the initiative to talk to me: " Dragon, the third mother told you a thing, in 81 years our family built these three bungalows, at that time there was no money, and I couldn't afford to eat, the house was built by the relatives themselves, when the completion of the project, I asked your father to buy a cheap big pig's head from the town back, and buy some vegetarian and boiled some eggs, so a big pot of braised stew, treat the relatives in the family to help, it is a thank you wine, your father and your uncle also sit on a big table, your father sandwiched a piece of vegetarian table, eager to drink three taels of wine, asked him to eat meat, but he said I like to eat soy productsAnd the uncle who was sitting next to your father came up with three big pieces of fat meat and gobbled up his mouth, barely swallowed it and then stretched out his chopsticks and said, I can still eat three more eggs, your father pressed his chopsticks with a chopstick and said: You are embarrassed, right? There are so many nieces in the third brother's family who have not eaten yet! So as long as he speaks, the old and young in this family will listen to him, and sit upright, and on the other hand, your uncle, no one will pay attention to his words, this is the difference between people!"

What's even funnier is what my cousins say, the happiest thing to do during the Spring Festival every year is to go to my grandmother's place to pay New Year's greetings, because you can eat all kinds of game in your house; yes, then our family will have all kinds of game in the refrigerator every year, everything, and as long as my father's nephews or grandma's relatives come, it will be a table full of game and good wine hospitality. One year, our three nephews were going to go to the town to pay New Year's greetings to their grandmother and pass by the door of the little uncle's house, but he stopped him in his house to play cards with him, and there was no food until 12:30 noon, until finally we were so hungry that we couldn't bear it, and shouted out: Today's New Year's Eve, I was going to go to the fourth uncle's house to eat good goods, and you pulled me to accompany your uncle to play cards until now, don't you even have a meal to eat?! That's it, everyone got a bowl of boiling water to soak dry rice and added a water egg, and your parents got a dish and waited for us in the air, hey, I lost my life, and I never went to my uncle's house again!

In fact, my uncle's character even my brother looks down on him, every time I return to my hometown my good brother Zhang Jianjun will ask me to go fishing with him to chat or something, because uncle he often complains that no one invited him to fish, then I don't care, just go to pick him up and call him to go fishing together, once two or three times, who knows that my brother directly said to me in person: don't bring him in the future, small material goods (referring to stingy ghosts or people who don't go on the stage), take a closer look and find that he put the fish fry in the fish pond that has just been put down in the net bag, and every time it is so, although don't pay, you also leave a good impression on the boss of the fish pond。 And the contradiction between him and me is slowly beginning, and he is really the little material described by my brother Zhang Jianjun, and he really despises him a little, because he is an elder, and he can't say it.

Because Dad's condition is getting worse and worse, the situation is getting worse and worse, as for Dad's posthumous affairs, or Dad's funeral business, Shubu and Aunt used their brains again: "Your dad is already like this, don't be sad, you have done your best, I think your dad will set up a tarpaulin downstairs and call the chef to cook the rice, 850 yuan a table is also very good!" In fact, before they officially told me this, I had already heard my mother and third sister tell me about this, and I categorically denied it: I firmly disagreed, I told them why," Dad at least estimates that it will take a month or two months to leave, and now it is the end of May, downstairs to set up a tent to cook food and there is no water, there is no electricity, such a high temperature plus flies and mosquitoes flying around, the dishes that are burned out can be eaten, and the eldest aunt, the second uncle, the third uncle They are all about 80 years old, in case these elders eat down, how can I explain to my cousins and cousins in the family, what are the consequences, you can know the consequences with a little thought about it, even if it is 2000 yuan a table in the restaurant, I am not short of this money and do not save this money"My mother later secretly told me that your uncle was going to wrap up a tarpaulin for his brother-in-law to cook tofu rice. I told my mother: Although the third sister is dedicated to helping this uncle and aunt, I will decide all the things about the tofu rice behind my father!

My uncle and aunt saw that I was silent, and then spoke to me in a threatening tone: "Don't think that you can be the master of your Lao Tzu's affairs alone, don't take us elders into account, there are some things that you still have to agree with our elders!", I saw my aunt say this on the side, so I told her about my concerns and scruples," I can give your brother a table at a higher price of 1000, no problem, but he must write a written guarantee to me, there will be no problem, otherwise all the medical expenses for food poisoning will be borne by him!", I retreated to advance their army, and the two of them knew my temper, so they were silent for the time being.

Why did Dad insist on asking for his uncle's name? In fact, there was something in his heart that he always blamed my uncle and aunt for sowing discord and juggling right and wrong. My third brother-in-law and sister are classmates, in 1995, the two of them fell in love in school and were caught by the school, and they were going to be expelled. After they graduated, they went their separate ways, my sister was assigned to Liyang Yuanfu Feed Group to be a salesman, in 1997, she had a monthly salary of more than 3,000 yuan, even more than 4,000 yuan, it can be said that she is definitely a white-collar worker, of course, the sale of this feed is all about the father's relationship network to help her cover, income and results are taken for granted, and just when the father was ready to find a mother-in-law for the third sister, she found that she was still reluctant to be a classmate (now the third brother-in-law), and the brother-in-law's family is poor Jingle can not be said, not even a marriage house, but these two people are difficult to break off this relationship, one has never been married, the other has never married, for this thing dad drinks every night I don't know how many wine glasses are broken, which parent in the world doesn't want their daughter to marry better! But this impasse has been unable to be solved and broken through, and my sister has formed a bond with my father, and she has always been stupid to think that this marriage is agreed by her uncle and aunt, and even ......; At that time, the third brother-in-law secretly came to our side when they didn't dare to go to my house, but secretly hid in the country little uncle's house and my sister to meet the tryst, and later saw that the stick beat the mandarin duck and couldn't break up the two of them, the little uncle and the little aunt also came over to persuade my dad to nod and agree, to be honest, the third sister was already 29 years old that year, and it really couldn't drag on, and my dad could only agree to the two of them getting married...... I don't know why my sister and brother-in-law always obey my uncle and aunt, and I don't know what ecstasy my uncle and aunt have on my third sister and third brother-in-law, and I am lukewarm to my parents and uncles and aunts. Dad has said to me more than once in private: "I am such a talking daughter, but the hearts of the people are enveloped by your uncle and aunt, although I was against it at first, but this is what parents all over the world do, but then I still agreed, and helped them bring their third nephew to your brother-in-law's house at the age of seven, if I still object, will I still help them take care of the child?" He said so sadly, and his words were mixed with dissatisfaction and grievances against his younger brother for sowing discord, until more than two years after my father left, at the family gathering, the third sister still expressed her appreciation and beauty to my uncle and aunt in front of me, and I unceremoniously scolded her: "Do you have a little brain, the brain is full of shit, you have been your uncle and aunt since you were a child, and your uncle and aunt paid for your education? Your children were brought up in your hometown to the age of seven, and your uncles and aunts helped you raise them? You never seem to be able to hear or understand your parents' thoughts and thoughts, do you? You don't even have the basic ability to discern and judge? Later, when their children's third nephew was admitted to undergraduate university in 2017, she said that she would invite her uncle and aunt to her house to celebrate and celebrate, and her mother was furious: "If you call your uncle and aunt over, none of my own children will come to participate!", I replied to her clearly: "I know who my parents are, I obey my mother's orders, you can do it yourself!"

It was because of this incident that Dad insisted on nodding this selfish brother and his wife before he left. After my father and uncle and aunt met one after another, on the afternoon of the 21st, although he looked very thin but in a good mood, as if everything had been done, he had no worries, and said to me with a relieved face: "Son, I want to get a haircut, and then we will be discharged from the hospital tomorrow and go home and wait!" I used the car to drive him to the barber shop he had been going to in the community, and sat on the barber chair with his weak torso; on the morning of the 22nd, I went through the procedures for being discharged from the hospital and going home according to his wishes, that is really the process of waiting for death, although I have been with him since the Qingming Festival until now, but after he went home until the day he left for half a month, every day is like a year, and he is tormented! But for his father, why not?

I could feel that he was trying to restrain the torture of the disease, clenching his teeth and enduring as little as possible not to make a sound to affect his family, while I kept going to the people's hospital to get him morphine and other analgesics, and then said hello to the hospital doctors, and directly changed to the whole box to take it, for which we all learned to inject subcutaneously, from the beginning of half a day to 2-3 a day, the dosage is getting faster and more frequent. The cancer cells have blocked his voice when he walks all over the place, and his voice that he has no strength to speak has also been closed, and only bones are left in his torso, as if he is running out of oil, because his eye sockets have collapsed deeply, so he looks at people and gives people a miserable feeling, so that when his grandson and granddaughter came back from Kunshan, they didn't dare to look at him or approach him. I never shied away from his miserable eyes, I still saw the kind and kind eyes, which were the window of communication between him and me, and only I could understand the meaning of his eyes...... Once he was lying in bed at noon and was woken up by pain, opened his eyes and gritted his teeth to endure it, I quickly took a morphine analgesic and leaned forward, he turned to look at me, I already understood all the meaning in his eyes, I asked him softly on the side, "Dad, do you want your son to inject you with this whole box of morphine, so that you can walk a little easier?!" He vigorously nodded his thin head like a chicken eating rice, and then held out a thumb of his right hand to me. My heart immediately wept like the flood water of the mountain gorge dam, and after hesitating again and again, I still felt that I had to ask my mother's opinion on this matter, after all, this matter should be illegal! My mother came over with the third sister who had just come back a few days ago, and the third sister said in front of me that this matter should still ask for the opinion of the little uncle, and I ignored her angrily, and walked out of the room directly to the community to breathe a sigh and relax; of course, every thing my only sister who can talk will tell me about the selfish uncle in every detail, and even when I asked her to accompany the eldest sister and the second sister to pick a cemetery for my father, she also had to say to me: "Take your uncle with you!". Dad occasionally turned on his voice, and at noon one day at the end of May, his blocked voice occasionally turned on, and I heard him say clearly and clearly while I was guarding him at the bedside of his room: "Son, I miss my second brother, can you go and pick up the second and third uncles?" Coincidentally, my uncle and aunt were also in the countryside, and when I told a few elders about my father's request, they immediately got into the car with me, but as soon as the four elders got into the car, I heard my aunt and uncle pressuring me in front of the two uncles: "Your father's funeral is not what you say you want to do, but it still has to be agreed by our elders!" As soon as they said it, I knew that it was still his brother-in-law who wanted to cook with a tarpaulin to cook rice, and the two uncles didn't say anything in the back, and they didn't say a word, and I didn't squeak and drove quickly.

When I got home, when my uncles went to my father's room to take pictures of him, I prepared the sofa and bench in the living room, and my mother and my third sister, who I couldn't figure out, were also beside me, and I made my attitude clear to them: " Elders, thank you for your care and care for your father, some things are definitely not my disrespect for you elders as a nephew, for example, my father's posthumous affairs to do the things of eating, I have my considerations and plans, considering the realistic conditions in all aspects and the age of the elders, I will never allow the canopy downstairs to cook and cook, so I will not discuss this matter with you elders here, so this is the end! As for the details of the operation of other things behind my father, please communicate with my mother and have a unified opinion, and my mother will tell me that my body is skinny, and I am also ordered by my parents, and there are so many elders in the family and my mother's uncles, aunts, etc., so please understand the difficulties of my nephew. After I finished speaking, I stood up and bowed to them, and both uncles said that they had no opinion, no problem, and I did not deal with this matter in a consultative, consultative tone at all, so my uncle and aunt could only stare at me.

After June, the weather began to get hotter and hotter, almost every night, his brother (uncle) and brother-in-law (little uncle) who my father had helped him would come to see him, of course, they were also from the same village, very familiar and warm, but my uncle did not change his selfish face, completely a villain, since every night I walked to my house to see your former benefactor, Your own brother, since you also felt his help back then, then you should be honest, he has to pick something out. That night, my father's room sat side by side with my uncle and aunt, uncle and aunt, my wonderful uncle didn't know which one was wrong, so he inexplicably stood up and walked to his father's bedside and said to his brother: "Brother, if you want to leave, leave early, so many people are also in a hurry to accompany you, Xiao Mao (the nickname of the third sister) has been back for a few days so far, and he still has to go to work at home, take care of the children!" , Father, who was lying quietly on the bed to rest, heard him say this, and immediately became excited, his hands arched slightly, and his feet kept tapping on the cushion on the bed in a small way, and the kind of "En~~" happened in his voice like when the old cow was provoked. The voice, immediately opened his eyes that were already slightly closed, stared at him tightly, the living treasure brother, said psychologically, I really want to go up and smoke him, it is not my turn to do it for my father, the uncle was so frightened that he took three steps back and sat on the stool, knowing that he was in trouble, he quickly instigated the little uncle to persuade his father to calm down, he is such a selfish guy who sow discord, the little uncle stood up and walked to the side of his father's bed, and said to the root of his ear: " Brother Yun Geng (Dad's nickname before his death), I know you are waiting for your grandchildren and grandchildren to come back, you hold on a little longer, it's going to be the weekend soon, they will all come back!", a sentence jumped up when people said, and laughed at what they said, that's the truth, after the uncle finished speaking, Dad's just spasmodic body gradually calmed down.

In 2010, when he returned to Changzhou from Shanghai Dahai Hospital for stimulation sampling and laboratory surgery, he happened to give his nephew to Changzhou Qianhuang Middle School to pay the tuition fee, the weather was still very hot, even I was sweating, and he insisted on queuing up for his nephew to pay the fee, and he couldn't persuade him to live or die. Actually, I knew: he knew he couldn't do anything more for this kid, but he still wanted to do the last thing for him---- queue up to pay the fee, and he wanted him to know. After paying the tuition fees and returning home, he said to his eldest grandson standing in front of him: "Prepare to repeat your studies for a year, for your future and dreams, when you graduate, just kowtow in front of your grandfather's cemetery!" Soon after, he made several more requests to me, and asked me to agree to him anyway: " One, the eldest sister and brother-in-law are mute, they don't even have a set of property of their own, you have to help the eldest sister buy all her house with mixed public-private property rights no matter what, they have a house in their hands, and the son and daughter-in-law will not ignore them in the future; Third, your sister is mute, and you have to check and handle this child's lifelong events!" And this grandson didn't have time to see him for the last time on the day his grandfather left, he secretly hid in his room and shed all the tears that he might shed in his life, and Dad's cousin found that he wet the quilt on his bed, and we knew that; yes, my grandfather tried his best to create a warm and warm childhood full of laughter, from the 18th day of birth until he was 20 years old, so many warm pieces, worthy of so many tears to set off!

The third sister basically came back to visit my father on the weekend, and I have stayed from the Qingming Festival to the end of May, in order not to let my father leave, the family does not know, our four sisters and brothers take turns to watch the night, my eldest sister and I are in the first half of the night, and the second sister and the third sister are on duty in the second half of the night. My father, who was already unconscious, was still shaking in bed by the pain, and we had already learned to inject him with morphine to relieve the pain. On the second night before he left, I was napping in a chair next to my bed when I was woken up by my mute sister, who told me in sign language that my father was shaking and aching, and I should give him painkiller injections. While the eldest sister woke me up, she also woke up the second sister and the third sister, because it was time to change shifts. I was taking out two sticks of morphine and scratching the lid of the glass bottle, just scratched one potion, and the other one was still scratching, when the third sister stood beside me with sleepy eyes and stopped me and said: "Uncle Xiao, don't give him anesthetic, let him dry up as soon as the oil goes out, let's not give him painkillers!"

"This is your father, our father! You know that my father always told me that this illness will hurt to death in the end! How can you bear to let your father still be guilty of such a crime before he leaves?!", I heard her use the third-person pronoun "he" when she said it, and I unceremoniously slammed it back, I never imagined that this would happen.

"You let him spend it endlessly, when will it be a head?!You also have a family and children, I also have a family and children, if you don't take care of it, I still have to take care of it?!", he even spoke in such a tone as his uncle, no wonder my father kept saying several times when he was healthy: his heart was enveloped by him.

"I've been with my father at home since the Qingming Festival, and you earn more than me every day, right? My two children have one more child than you! You are as selfish as your uncle, don't you still know who your parents are, who supports you to graduate, and who helps you take care of your children? If you take care of your family, then you can go home now!" I looked at her face that looked like that uncle, and the more I talked, the more angry I became, the more annoyed I became, and my voice became higher and higher unconsciously.

"Don't give him morphine anyway, now it's my turn to be on duty, you guys go to bed quickly. The eldest sister and the second sister, who were standing on the side and watching, also sensed that the two of us were arguing, and pulled us apart, and she told me in a dumb voice: "Don't quarrel at Dad's bedside, Dad will be very sad to hear it." But after learning that her sister was not allowed to give her father an injection, she was also excited.

"Even the dumb sister knows better than you, one day we will all be old, and we will have to pay it back sooner or later!", just like that, my eldest sister and I were pushed out of the room by her. That was one of the two most wrong things I did when my father was dying: I didn't have to argue with my third sister, but insisted on going to bed after the injection. The other thing is what I have always wanted to help my dad do but didn't do: secretly inject all the integrated morphine into my dad to make it easier for him. It won't make him walk so hard and painful on the last leg of the road.

The day he left was June 8, 2012 at 12:20 noon, I went to the station to pick up the third brother-in-law and nephew who rushed back from northern Jiangsu, I just entered his room, saw him swallow his last breath, the whole body weakened, even though the weather in June was already very hot, I still clearly saw a white steam-like ball, slowly drifting into the wardrobe next to the bed, I know that he is still reluctant to give up this home. I then drove to the village where I had grown up as a child, knocked on the door of my uncles and uncles, and told them the etiquette that my father had taught me when he was alive: the moment they opened the door, I knelt on one leg and bowed my head...... He is such a person who thinks about others all the time, even if it is something behind him, he has to teach his son that he is afraid that there will be mistakes in his son's etiquette, and even the first seven, three seven, five seven and other things behind him have to be explained, "I am a member of the **, don't do so many things, you are separated by such a distance, it is not safe to go back and forth, just grab some rice and throw some money in front of the incense burner, I will buy it myself and eat it......" , He even his sons and daughters came back to cook him a meal for the first seven, three seven, five seven, he felt too troublesome children, I know that he is everywhere for our sake, the third sister is 180 kilometers away in Taihuang City, northern Jiangsu, we are 170 kilometers away in Kunshan, he is afraid that we will have an accident in the traffic back and forth, so everything can be simplified and simple, he ...... Later, after I heard something that my mother told me personally, I didn't choke on the spot, and I burst into tears and couldn't cry.

On the night of Dad's departure, his four nephews stayed up all night to keep a vigil for their uncle, but told us both to go to rest and sleep first, and it was indeed very tiring to run around during the day, his mourning hall was located in the living room of the house, and the four cousins played cards in the dining room on the side, originally he agreed to keep it in the hospital until the end, but his strange brother who was telling right and wrong came to him every three or five times and said to him, how could he not go in his own house, and finally Dad listened to his slander and asked to be at home, if according to our original plan, he could hold on for at least another 2-3 months。 It was almost 12 o'clock in the evening, and I threw a pack of cigarettes to them with a tired face and climbed into the bed in the room, and fell asleep, and at about two o'clock in the morning, my father suddenly appeared in my dream and said to me: Son, get up and scatter, your brother has no cigarettes, hurry up and distribute cigarettes to them. My mind suddenly came to my senses, and I walked to the side of the restaurant and asked my brothers if they still had cigarettes...... In the evening, when I invited the mage to come over and his crying spirit, I carefully walked to the temporary ceremony table downstairs with his spirit card, and he finally heard the voice of his mute daughter who wanted to hear again, my second sister, who was dumb due to medical accidents when she was 6 years old, lay in front of the spiritual platform "Dad, Dad...... Crying, but because of the loss of speech function, she can only and can only shout these two words, maybe because Dad's love is too thick, she has not been able to forget it, when she cried Dad for the third time, I found that all the neighbors and relatives around were wiping their tears, I knew that he must have heard .......

The matter of the banquet guests, I did not agree to his uncle and aunt's persuasion to set up a tent to cook to save money, but put it in the restaurant, and notified all the relatives to go to eat after removing the mourning number, the owner of the restaurant is still the son of a cousin of my mother, so it is not taboo about this, but on this last thank-you banquet, there was a sudden power outage in the kitchen and then a fire, the distant cousin (the boss) said that he had never encountered this thing, and the shelf of the eight-tone drummer who played the trumpet suddenly fell down, and the whole table and the dishes on it were just resting on the laps of those people and did not even spill a drop of soup, All this happened almost at the same time in an instant, so that all the relatives present were frightened to drop the dishes and chopsticks and run outside, everyone ran out at a loss, only I knew that he was "targeted" Mine: Because the little uncle who sowed discord was vetoed by me for the first time for his brother-in-law's kitchen to cook under a tent, he went directly to a dying person to complain, not to say that he could save a lot of money by cooking with a tarpaulin, and my father also told me about this ten days before he left, and he could save money by cooking with a tarpaulin, I knew that his thinking and logical judgment ability was gone, but I still patiently and sadly explained to my father: In case the uncles and aunts fall down, I can't face the brothers and sisters in the family, and this medical and medical expenses will also be a lot of expenses。 I really can't know what my selfish uncle is capable of making my father agree to his shady brother's request, just as he can easily win the heart of my only talkative third sister, but in fact the owner of the hotel only charges us 800 yuan a table.

The selfish and stingy uncle did too much, because he was the elder of the family and a teacher, and all the gift money collection and bookkeeping were done by him, but he did a good thing, maybe he saw that all the people were paying more than the three hundred yuan he paid, he actually felt embarrassed and inappropriate after paying the account to my mother, and after paying the account in the morning, it is estimated that he took out three hundred yuan and handed it to my mother after a fierce ideological struggle, and my mother looked confused:" What do you mean by this? Are you cursing me to death? How can this money be given twice, ah? You are still a person who has studied in school, been a teacher and a school leader, bah...", my mother was originally covered with special diseases, she was originally angry with this little uncle who has been selfish and calculating since she was a child, and her husband was in an extremely bad mood just left, so she directly scolded her back. Standing on the side, I saw that my uncle's face was blue and purple, and his face was full of gold and stiffness, and he vigorously denied it: Sister-in-law, I didn't mean this, I didn't mean this......

After my father left, we put money and rice in front of his spirit tablet, and when all the incense in the incense burner was extinguished, I took my mother to Kunshan to live with us. After waiting for the "Five-Seven", we considered renting it out, and renting it to my mother, who has no retirement pension, as her pocket money. Since our rent requirements were not high, we soon rented it out to a couple who were doing business in their hometown, with a son, a daughter, and two children, the boy was about 20 years old with my nephew, and his son lived in the room where my father was dying, but we had thrown away the original bed, and they prepared their own bed. One day, four years later, when my mother returned to her hometown to collect rent, the couple told my mother: "My son was half frightened to death, and for three nights in a row he said that an old man in clothes was standing by his bed, waking him up and asking him what he wanted to eat." At first, we didn't believe it, and then we were also made by the child had no way, and we didn't dare to go back to the room to sleep, so we invited a Taoist priest to come and take a look, and the Taoist priest calculated and told us: There is indeed an old man walking in this room, but he didn't break the "seven" when he left, so he was hungry and wanted to ask you for something to eat, and it would be fine, don't be afraid that this old man was a good person before he died, not an evil ghost, you burn some paper money and give it to him, it's fine!. Later, we actually bought two packs of paper money and burned it at the top of the staircase, and never came out again, so we never told you." When my mother came back and told me this, I burst into tears and wept silently, and immediately said: When I move into the villa, I must go back to my hometown to invite him.

From the diagnosis of cancer cells in September 2010 to the diagnosis of cancer cells metastasized to the lungs on June 8, 2012, although as the saying goes, there is no filial son who has been sick for a long time before bed, if conditions permit, I am really willing to live 10 years less to give it to him, my mentor and friend, father......! His departure made me feel that I no longer had such a strong desire for a career, and it took me almost half a year to slowly come to my senses, and I began to think about what the meaning of life is? Slowly I began to realize: I decided that no matter what the future holds, I asked myself to do only four words to my family, friends, relatives, classmates, business partners, etc.: I have a clear conscience! Strive to follow my father's example and benchmark, lead by example, teach my next generation by word and deed, and never disappoint his ardent expectations!

You have left us a heavy and inexhaustible spiritual wealth, and I will definitely let it be passed on!