(20) I want to cry without tears
By the time Su Mu woke up to chat, it was almost twelve o'clock in the middle of the night. Before she could open her eyes, she felt that the light in the room was stinging her eyes, so before she opened them, she first pulled the quilt on her head and covered herself completely, and then muttered to Ledo how long she had been asleep.
Le Duo was playing a game on the other side of the bed, and when she heard Su Mu's question, she said directly without thinking about it:
"In my words, you'll sleep for a while. ”
"Don't make a fuss, what time is it, have you eaten?Is there any water? I'll go, why do I hurt all over......"
Su Mu originally wanted to turn over and stretch her waist and get out of bed to find water, but before she could turn over half of her body, the soreness caused by the muscles of her whole body directly inhibited her movements. She lay back in her original position, shocked and a little tearless, if it weren't for the quilt now on her head, and she didn't want to move any more, then she would have bitten the corners of the quilt and cried hard again.
It's over, just now in her physical state, no three or four will definitely not be able to rest, according to the recovery speed of the last time she climbed Mount Tai, she wants to fully recover in this situation, the fastest time has to be five or six, but if there is no accident, she will appear on the Great Wall after three, so isn't this her life?
Leduo didn't know what Su Mu was thinking, but she knew that it was normal for Su Mu to have this situation, and as early as when she was sleeping, she and Weiyang had already guessed that this situation would occur, so everything Su Mu needed, she and Weiyang were ready.
"At the head of the bed, Weiyang in your thermos cup has filled you with water, and the thermal insulation effect of your thermos cup is not very good, it is estimated that the temperature of the water should be just right now, and you can drink it directly. If you don't want to eat these, then order takeout, because at this time, you want to go out to eat, then the two of us can only find a hotel to jump, and then you can make do with a fruit plate. ”
If it was Su Muhao, then when she heard Le Duo's words, she would definitely fight her to the death, and more importantly, if she was fine, Le Duo would not have a chance to say these words. It's just that now Su Mudu is already in this mood, and she doesn't want to listen to Leduo at all, she doesn't even want to drink water, she just thinks about how she can survive in the process of climbing the Great Wall.
Ledo waited half a day without any movement, which forced her to withdraw from the game. She poked Su Mu through the quilt, as if to confirm whether Su Mu was alive, and after seeing that Su Mu didn't react to this, she kicked Su Mu without leaving a piano, almost kicking Su Mu directly off the bed.
"What are you doing, there is no movement, aren't you thirsty, is it possible that you can't finish pouring water for you, and you have to feed me?"
"Why don't you have anything?"
When he had to admit that there was no way to change the status quo, Su Mu also gave up struggling, just silently shed tears in his heart, looked at the flower board without love, and asked Le Duo. When Le Duo heard this question, he cast a contemptuous look, then picked up his phone again, and replied to Su Mudao while playing:
"You still have it, you taught me all kinds of things before climbing the mountain, but your physical strength is not as good as mine, and you make yourself like this, you are too empty, I thought I was weak enough, but I didn't expect you to be even more weak. I'm really supposed to be exercising, and now like this, your body is really not schooling."
"Do you think I don't want to? I'm dying of weakness now, and I didn't go back to work with a high fever during the Chinese New Year, and my heart hurt so much that I sometimes felt as if I was going to die. ”
"That's not to blame yourself, it's really not your family, how can you work so hard? And I didn't pay you much salary, what about you? Who didn't feel distressed when he looked at you at that time? When I went to see you with your boss, when I came back, your boss wanted you to resign, you and I are both like this, how can your family be better? Fortunately, you have made up your mind to resign, otherwise we will have to protest collectively and let you quit your job. ”
As soon as she mentioned this matter, Le Duo felt so angry that she didn't think there was anything wrong with Su Mu's family's attitude. Maybe what they did was a little extreme in their approach, and they didn't use the right way of expression, but these things that Su Mu did were indeed a bit too much for them, and it was really not too much to have such a reaction.
No one would want to watch someone who hurts on the tip of their hearts spoil themselves like this, Su Mu bears all their love, everyone hopes that she can live happily, but she spoils herself like this, who is it, looking at her like this, she can't feel better.
Didn't Su Mu understand these things? No, of course she understood, and no one knew better than her how much those who hurt her loved her. But although she also knew that she was not doing this well, and had told herself many times what to do in dealing with this kind of thing, every time she thought about it was good, and when it came to practice, it backfired.
Doesn't Su Mu hate her character of being too easily soft-hearted? How could that be? Who would feel very happy when she knew that she had been wronged? Even she felt that it was because of her soft-heartedness that she had suffered so many grievances, how could she want to continue to be soft-hearted?
But maybe it's really "easy to change and difficult to change", even if she knows this, when it happens, she still can't control herself. Sometimes she has already thought of rebuttals in her heart, and even the words have already rushed to her mouth, but as long as someone is blowing the wind next to her, or she herself is not able to control and make excuses for others, then her efforts will be in vain. So Su Mu was always thinking about whether someone could take care of her problem, if there was someone by her side to stop her, maybe things would get a lot better.
However, what disappointed her was that these girls around her were all very good at talking, and when they taught her, they were more and more powerful than the other, and they were almost the same as the teaching director when they were in school, but when it came to putting them into action, they didn't hesitate and did a long ideological struggle before running with Su Mu, then sometimes they immediately disarmed and surrendered, and they did what Su Mu decided.
It's because of this that Su Mu sometimes feels very aggrieved, obviously these guys are the same as her, why can't they understand her a little more, and have to be embarrassed for her, really, do they think that if she changes first, they can follow suit? Then why can't they change it first, and then influence her to change it again?
Thinking about this, Su Mu became more and more aggrieved, so her facial expression gradually became hideous, and then she almost gritted her teeth and said to Le Duo:
"You're embarrassed about me, what kind of bullied you by your store manager, you lied to this and that, never said a good word from you, all the dirty water was poured on you, you didn't just endure it, only with me, and I didn't see you resist in reality. ”
"How can you be so picky about this girl, am I the same as you? I have a son to raise, I have to provide for him to go to school, and I have to save money for him to buy a house, buy a car, and marry a daughter-in-law in the future, and I have to ensure my own food and clothing, even if I am wronged, can I resign? I resigned, who will raise the child?"
When Leduo heard Su Mu's quibble, he was so angry that he almost threw away his phone and went to screw her ears. After finishing these words, before Su Mu could do anything to refute, she continued:
"Do you think he can be reliable? We have known each other for so many years, have you ever seen him? Yelling at me to go home, let me go home What if I can't find a job for a while, he doesn't give me a way to solve these things. I am a father and a mother by myself to take care of the children, and my husband is like a giant baby, except for going to work, playing games, and making me angry, do you see what he has done? If you want me to go back and not live in a different place with him, then it's okay, he can find me a suitable job so that I can find a suitable salary, what can I do when I can't make money and go back? I advise you not to do something, because I have experienced it, and I don't want you to have the same experience, if there was someone who had taught me like this, I would have done everything according to her, and I would not have resisted at all. So if you have me, you can listen to something and be content. ”
In fact, Le Duo has been holding these words in her heart for a long time, she has always hoped to find a chance to talk to Su Mu in person, but she has been dragged down by the work of the two Rao, and she has not had a chance to meet alone. This time she finally had a chance, and Leduo wanted to think about everything she thought about in one go, but when these words came to her mouth, she didn't know what should be and what should not be. picked it up, and pieced together such almost all the words, and in the end, Leduo himself didn't know what kind of mood it was. She looked at Su Mu, and she didn't even know what kind of mood she should use to face her. And it's okay if it's not, she also began to feel aggrieved together, and the idea of divorce continued to deepen in her mind, making her eager to call her husband now, and then discuss things related to divorce.
Regarding the divorce, Leduo did not joke with Su Mu. Su Mu didn't know what the relationship between the two of them was, she only knew that her husband really didn't care about her, but Su Mu didn't know, it didn't mean that she didn't know either. In the past few years of separation from him, she also felt a little reluctant at first, but in order to be able to give her children a better living environment, she had to find a job that could give her a higher salary. Her husband is not enterprising, and his salary is not enough for the children's expenses for a month, and if she is the same as him, it is really hard to imagine what their family will become. What made her even more unbearable after that with their current economic conditions, it was already very laborious to maintain this kind of daily expenses, and her husband usually had to rely on the family, but this person didn't even ask her opinion, so he bought a car on his own initiative for the convenience of commuting.
It's not that she doesn't know her husband's route to work, she usually takes the bus to get to the station in less than ten minutes, and counting the time it takes to walk back and forth, it takes 20 minutes at most, and buying a car doesn't make any sense for them to come at all. What's more, at this time, the child is already attending various interest classes and tutoring classes, when she wants to buy a drum kit for the child to learn, and her family conditions are not good, so just pick a convenient, ordinary, and can make do with it, but he bought a car, which is the mother, I guess there is no way to bear it, right?
At this time, even if she is an infatuated girl, she should no longer want to continue to persevere, Le Duo has also thought of giving up countless times, but every time she hears her son crying and shouting that he wants his father, she will always be soft-hearted and reluctant to let her child have no father, so although she has thousands of reluctances in her heart, she can only endure it, and at the same time, she keeps daydreaming, expecting her life to become better.
And it is precisely because of this unpleasant experience that when dealing with Su Mu, Leduo's expectations will increase unconsciously. She will want Su Mu to find a reliable man, not to repeat her old ways, and she will keep giving her those experiences that she has experienced, for fear that Su Mu will experience these pains again, but sometimes Su Mu will listen to her opinions, but most of the time, Su Mu does not believe in evil, thinking that she will not get the same fate.
Some people's happiness is the same, but there are all kinds of misfortunes, but no matter how things develop, there are only two kinds of final results. At first, Le Duo tried hard to get Su Mu happiness, wanted to drag her on the right track, and let her suffer less, but after a long time, she found that for Su Mulai, there were some things that she would not have listened to advice if she had not experienced it herself. After chatting with Weiyang this time, she also completely changed her mind. So she will only say these words this time again, and in the future, she can only play the role of accompanying her to bear the pain.
When two people get along, one party needs to choose to compromise, in the past, Su Mu wanted to work hard to change herself and integrate into her life, so change it to her to adapt to her ideas after drinking once, and go down with her.