At that moment, Zhuang Ya couldn't run away, she said angrily, "The children are together, why don't you care about anything, don't care about anything, throw it to me, throw it to me!"

"To make it clear, you yourself said that I can't figure it out, you have to do it yourself, why do you ...... now Let's go, go where you like, get out!"

No one knows that the "get out" after the quarrel, and the feeling of not having the slightest sweet words, all the sweetness was melted into naught by these words, and the sadness in the heart surged into the heart.

Zhuang Ya finally called her mother, "I'm at home, come and pick me up!"

No one knows her despair.

But my mother was very fast, she didn't communicate a few words, hung up the phone, but she began to prepare to come over, and in the afternoon of the same day, Zhuang Ya knocked on the door and stood in front of Zhuang Ya.

Only then did she know that she was really here, she was still thinking about it, just talking.

But I didn't think that the other party really came.

"You...... You...... Mom, what's wrong...... No, busy at home, this ......" Zhuang Ya was a little dumbfounded when she saw her mother, and she couldn't speak.

But Zhuang Ya's mother seemed to be in a hurry and breathing rapidly, and it was obvious that the other party was in a hurry, Zhuang Ya's mother calmed down, took a few breaths, and then said, "It's okay, let's go...... Your dad is still down there."

"You...... You...... Busy ......" Zhuang Ya still feels unbelievable.

"Let's go, let's go, where is the thing, where is it, I'll mention it!" Zhuang Mu was already looking around the room as she spoke.

In fact, Zhuang Ya is not ready to really leave, but she is in a hurry, talking in her heart, it is considered to be happy, and it also shows that she has a place to go, not necessarily here, but to leave, to be honest, Zhuang Ya has thought about it many times, but when she really wants to leave, Zhuang Ya is a little hesitant and reluctant.

That kind of reluctance, I don't know how to describe it, is more like a habit of nature.

may have been unwilling to leave countless times, and finally supported, she even at the moment, I don't know why I was inexplicably worried about Ying Hanchu, "Let's go, he, what should he do?"

Mother Zhuang looked for large and small packages everywhere, ready to pick them up, looked at them in the corner, and when she heard Zhuang Ya's words, she was a little stunned, and replied casually, "Such an adult, you can't die of hunger, you worry about yourself!"

The implication is obvious, you should worry about yourself, worry about others watching!

Zhuang Mu touched Zhuang Ya's face, that casual intimacy, but when Zhuang Mu's rough hand touched, the originally warm picture became a little stiff, and her face immediately turned to the side like a rejection, avoiding the hand, the sudden temperature, and the hairy * rough * feeling, so that Zhuang Ya naturally avoided it.

It's like a knee-jerk reaction after being burned, a feeling that is not governed by the brain

Mother Zhuang was also stunned, and then withdrew her hand a little awkwardly, "Uh...... I...... I see you're thin, you're skinny."

Mother Zhuang resumed her eyes looking for items again, and said, "Where is the thing, your father is still waiting, hurry up!"

Zhuang Ya didn't say that he was actually not ready to leave, and what he just said, that sentence, was actually not worried about Ying Hanchu's daily life, but thinking, will he leave by himself, he will not do anything under his nose, and he has an inexplicable sense of insecurity.

This is also the wonder that Zhuang Ya thought about later.

(1) Approval for yourself)

In her heart, she wanted to correct this psychology as if she were reading words to herself, and asked herself, as if a red pen was writing in her heart:

Correction: Why aren't you more worried about yourself, or your children, or your parents, coming all the way over, but wondering if you will do something while you are not there?

Will he do anything?

What will be done?

This is Zhuang Ya can't answer, and she doesn't understand her psychology at that time.

But she remembered that Ying Hanchu, who was originally playing the game, looked at Zhuang's mother and just said hello casually, without raising her head or saying anything, maybe she didn't want to explain politely, it was already like this, for him, it didn't matter whether he left or not.

But Zhuang Ya looked at Ying Hanchu for a moment, and she was inexplicably worried.

It wasn't until many years later that Zhuang Ya understood the reason in his heart.

Correction in mind:

Red letter * Revision: Because of the uneasiness in my heart, maybe I didn't realize it at that time, whether it was the so-called birth of a child, or the second child later, in fact, Zhuang Ya has always been lost in her heart, as if her heart is always empty and afraid, these realistic children, as well as people who can be seen, can touch things, in order to bring her some comfort, and a sense of security, to make up for the little panic in her heart.

The sense of security has always been not given by others, it should be given by oneself, which Zhuang Ya only understood after many years.

But at that time, she always hoped that she could hold something, she couldn't hold someone, she couldn't hold her heart, she couldn't hold her heart, she could always catch one, her heart would settle down a little, and then she relied on giving birth to a child, and she had a feeling of tying up multiple parties and tying each other.

But it was only later that I learned that it was only herself who was bolted, so Gong Hanxu appeared in the back, and no one knew her despair.

She reviewed herself in her heart, summing up:

"If you start over, you will be millions, millions, don't be like this again, love someone desperately, don't need it, don't do this, even if you love again, leave some for yourself, no, love yourself more, only if you love yourself first, it is possible, there are others who love you, understand? People who don't even love themselves, others won't love themselves, why should you be so humble at that time, humble to the dust like Zhang Ailing, but in the end there is still nothing, remember, in the future, don't be like this in the future, don't ...... Love yourself, love yourself more!"

But such a summary was too late, at that time, Dian Zhuangya was still bleeding in her head, and she couldn't tell what she was doing in her heart, as if she was used to it, as if she was unwilling, or for a promise, a promised home, and a better future.

Or in order to return to the original love, I don't understand why it is broken up in the end, and how to get together will become a forced and embarrassing one.

Why did a good relationship become like this, Zhuang Ya couldn't understand.

I don't understand what is called.

(2. Whether to go or not)

Zhuang Ya remembered that she looked at that time and Ying Hanchu was inexplicably worried, thinking, who was the girl in the game, she didn't figure it out.

I didn't figure out the voice of the girl who was in the game, whether it was something behind it and Ying Hanchu, not like everyone else, just a partner in the game who "rushed * sha" together.

But at that time, Zhuang Ya remembered that she couldn't help it and didn't say it, not wanting to expose some information in front of her, which made her mother worry about herself.

Zhuang Ya remembered the step she took back, smiled, squeezed out a smile, and turned her eyes to find Zhuang's mother, but Yu Guang still wanted to look at this man.

I don't know if I want to worry about whether to ask or not, or if I want him to say something and let me stay, or if I am afraid that the girl will have something to do with him......

She didn't know either, Yu Guang seemed to be used to paying attention to him.

It wasn't until she looked at her proudly and didn't see Zhuang's mother that Zhuang Ya took her eyes away and went to look elsewhere.

Finally, I saw Zhuang's mother in the room.

The scene in front of her, Zhuang Ya didn't know how to cry inexplicably, it was the feeling of being a little moved, a *bed* of clothes, already folded a little clothes!

Mother Zhuang looked at Zhuang Ya standing at the door, and said, "Don't be stupid, hurry, the car you call will ask for money, * time, more than a minute and more money!"

"Oh!" Zhuang Ya immediately helped clean up.

Yes, she felt that she was here to help, why did she think inexplicably that something was wrong, she hadn't figured out whether to beat her or not, why did she ...... now

In a blink of an eye, I packed up a base of clothes that were more than ten centimeters high, and they were neatly stacked.

Zhuang Ya looked at the clothes, as well as the mother Zhuang who was next to Mali, I don't know why, I always felt that something was wrong, and I couldn't say it.

Zhuang Mu also noticed Zhuang Ya's pause, "What are you doing, hurry up, how can you do things grinding, how can this ...... Come on, come on, I'll get it, go see the child, don't wake up, I can't see my mother, I'll cry, it's inconvenient to coax at that time, I haven't cried yet, I see I'm going to wake up, hurry up and tease!"

Zhuang's mother said and drove Zhuang Ya out of the room, in fact, Zhuang Ya was not ready to say anything, but was driven out first, Zhuang's mother shouted, "Hurry up, go and see, I slept very well when I came, the diapers are fine, don't change them for the time being, prepare, there must be urine when you wake up, no, I will give alms, so save a diaper, now the diapers are so expensive, go quickly, go back!"

There was a reminder from Zhuang's mother behind her, and she was worried that Zhuang Ya didn't hear it, and she heard it clearly, and she was afraid that the raised volume would stir up the child, and Zhuang's mother felt inconsistent hesitation.

But this sense of familiarity makes Zhuang Ya feel inexplicably intimate.

No, Zhuang's mother pulled Zhuang Ya and whispered next to the room, "Look, no, she woke up and called me, be quick, go home quickly and eat, it's too late!"

Zhuang Mu is in a hurry, hurriedly cleaned up, Zhuang Ya came back to her senses, by the way, was holding the hand, and looked at the room just now Zhuang Mu came out, the door of the room, there are already two or three boxes of size, Zhuang Mu said, "Look at the clean express box over there, the size is OK, just put (clothes), rest assured, the bottom of the box is padded with paper, bags, will not stain the clothes!"

Speaking, looking at Zhuang Ya's hesitant appearance, Zhuang's mother thought she was worried, so she said, "There are all clean boxes selected, it's okay, it's okay, don't worry, go home to wash and dry, I've seen it in the past few days, it's all good weather!"

Mother Zhuang said, ready to clean up this room, but looking at the child, she was ready to do a big job of strangled sleeves, put down a little, and *strangled* up, looking away.

Zhuang Ya timidly pulled Zhuang's mother, but still asked, "Do you really want to leave?" Actually, actually, we are fine, I just said, it's still ......."

Zhuang Ya wanted to say that she was not ready to leave, and she had not thought about it, but Zhuang Mu looked serious and serious, "What do you say: it's all here, the car is ready, anyway, go back and play, come again, it's not the same!"

Zhuang's mother seemed to have jumped away unintentionally, and went back because of the reason of emotional incompatibility, and became, going back to slip around, change the thinking, and change the mood of the words.

Zhuang Ya looked at Ying Hanchu again.

Ying Hanchu didn't say anything.

You may not have noticed it yet, pay attention to something, and concentrate on the game.

Even, Zhuang Ya felt that Ying Hanchu didn't see it, or didn't want to express anything when he saw it!

Looking at this busy man holding a computer, at a table.

(3. Memories of buying a computer)

Zhuang Ya inexplicably remembered that this computer was still her decision to run a good business and her determination to study hard, and there was no TV in this rented house, and the concept at that time was to watch TV or computers.

There is no such thing as watching mobile phones to play games, watching mobile TV.

Both are mainly TVs, and computers are also rare.

However, thinking that work is not a day, and it is inconvenient and expensive to go to the cinema to watch a movie on weekdays, so it is cheaper to watch a movie on average, of course, it is a free movie offline, which is also considered to pass the time, and then cooperate with yourself to check the information, study, etc.

It can be used for recreation, but also to help with study, of course, there is also because she imagined it, or when she was thinking about buying a TV or a computer at that time, Ying Hanchu said, "In this way, you can watch it together at home, you don't want to go out, it's raining, the sun is too big, you can stay at home, watch TV together, chat, and save money, it's not to pass the time!"

At that time, Zhuang Ya made a decision to buy a computer at that time, and the idea of buying a computer in her heart accounted for 200% at once, and she was still hesitant before Ying Hanchu said this.

There is no 30% idea of buying a computer, because a computer is naturally more expensive than a TV.

And the economic situation at that time, I was reluctant to buy a TV, and I also talked about computers, which felt fantastical.

But at that time, Zhuang Ya had a picture of expectation, after Ying Hanchu said that, looking forward to it, and also imagining it, there seemed to be a sense of face in front of him, they were in front of the computer, chatting together, watching TV, and searching for the scene of laughter in the show.

This fantasy scene supported her, and she was busy for two or three months before she finally had the spare money to buy a computer.

Of course, there is another reason, Ying Hanchu said to buy, just buy better, otherwise it will not cost two or three months of wages, thinking about a better life in the future, but also looking forward to, like Ying Hanchu said, if you want to buy a good one, so that the time is long, the quality is good, and the money is not the same, otherwise the general is always bad, card, not counted, the second point actually costs a lot of money.

That's why Zhuang Ya worked hard.

She did buy it, expecting that Ying Hanchu could also come out of the possible Yingying Yanyan, watch TV with herself every day, and cultivate more relationships.

Because what Zhuang Ya was thinking about at the time could also study and check information, in fact, there was not such a big *inducement* reason, and watching TV was not so attractive.

She just spent more time with Ying Hanchu, and this computer is just a medium, so she naturally focuses on what to watch, Zhuang Ya doesn't care so much.

It's good to have Ying Hanchu together, it's good to watch anything, even if you watch a movie you don't like, it's okay, watch it together, Lele, cry, and cry with the plot.

It's just that the truth is always crueler than imagined.

I bought the computer,At first, I did occasionally get off the TV together.,But with a few times of playing games with a mobile phone at the beginning of the cold is not very enjoyable.,Sometimes the mobile phone is out of battery.,Or the picture is stuck.,Or it's inconvenient to chat with friends and need to switch.。

Because of quitting the game, chatting, and coming back in, you may have to wait for a few minutes, or ten minutes, for the team members to start.

Naturally, at the beginning, Zhuang Ya also proposed to play with a computer, but as she spent more time playing, she later had a headset for the game on the computer.

While playing, you can chat at the same time, without affecting and no longer worrying about the regrouping game partner who quits, or in reality, the problem of missing the chat.

Ying Hanchu felt very convenient.

In this way, you can also play with a large screen, and naturally the computer you just bought is also fast, the response is good, and it is still a good quality store, and there are many games to search.

Slowly, Ying Hanchu began to rely on the computer to play games.

I don't want Zhuang Ya to watch TV shows anymore.

Slowly developing, Zhuang Ya waited for Ying Hanchu's so-called few games to finish, and then showed Zhuang Ya, but one game after another.

Sometimes Zhuang Ya is also disinterested.

And what's more, even if it is given, Ying Hanchu's kind of dislike, what to watch, Ying Hanchu feels bad, naturally there are many quarrels, and the computer is thrown to Ying Hanchu.

People, after using a good one, they naturally don't want to give in anymore, they have wronged themselves, they have used a better computer, and compared to the limitations of mobile phones, they are naturally reluctant to use mobile phones to play anymore.

In this way, the phone is put aside, you need to look at the phone, reply to the message, make a call, watch the game next to it, and chat with your partner, he feels, very comfortable and casual, don't worry about missing the information, and the limitations of the mobile phone card.

And at the last point, Zhuang Ya finally compromised, although she felt uncomfortable, but she thought "It's okay to play, anyway, is the game anyway?"

And Zhuang Ya's concerns, there is another point, that is, because of the time of use of the computer, there are a lot of quarrels, not to mention the destruction of feelings, Ying Hanchu has not touched himself for half a month.

And compared with before, the frequency of touching himself is lower, and life does not have the occasional warmth before, naturally Zhuang Ya will be suspicious of these changes, afraid that things will deteriorate, because she is pregnant, including giving birth to a baby, the xing life between them has become less.

If he didn't even sleep together, and the occasional sweet talk, Zhuang Ya felt that he was pushing him to someone else.

If the body does not recover, it is not possible to think about it or not, and whether the other party wants to or not are two different things, and women who have experienced life understand that this feeling of possible deviation from the relationship will be stronger.

It will be clearer in mind.

usually quarrels, and then, the other party sees himself several times like an enemy, at least even if there is no warmth before, he has a peaceful attitude, so Zhuang Ya panicked.

Searching, so much, the relationship changes after pregnancy, and the final separation, and even the end of divorce.

Therefore, Zhuang Ya decided, then let him be, anyway, it is also a computer, just a computer, don't affect your feelings for such a trivial matter.

So it was a tacit acquiescence, even if I couldn't bear it, all this was too different from the original intention I originally expected to buy a computer, Zhuang Ya still responded to the cold.

I didn't take the initiative to look at the computer, Ying Hanchu was polite to myself, sometimes embarrassed to show myself the computer to play, and I didn't urge myself, and even occasionally looked at the computer together, but I thought everything was fine.

But as the days progressed, it seemed that the child came out, and the mother of Zhuang took care of it in January, but I didn't feel anything, and the years seemed to be quiet, but the problem came.

After Zhuang's mother left, Zhuang Ya felt obviously powerless, and suddenly felt that she shouldn't force her mother to leave.

Knocking out your teeth and swallowing them in your stomach is like this......

Zhuang Ya silently picked up the affairs of the family, but she only noticed that this man had no sense of action, and he was reluctant to do anything, and he didn't do it well.

Zhuang Ya was very disappointed, but the triviality of taking care of the child made her immediately troubled.

Cooking, cooking, taking care of the baby, washing, all the idle things at home are all here.

Zhuang Yacai realized, oh, the original years are quiet, it's really like that sentence, you feel that the years are quiet, and someone is moving forward silently.

I can't tell how much I have done, but in fact, I have done a lot, and I remember that I have contributed a lot to my family.

But it's already like this, so what else can be done?

Doing it, playing it, that's what it feels like.

Zhuang Ya became more and more annoyed and depressed, and the two quarreled unconsciously, so there was something next.

developed into a quarrel with each other, as well as a hurry to leave, Zhuang Ya's phone, and Zhuang's mother came to clean up things.

(4. Reality)

Zhuang Ya thought about everything, as if her brain was wandering.

Finally, Zhuang Ya looked at the man's back, holding the computer, and looked hard at the table, Zhuang Ya smiled bitterly, as if nothing had changed.

Just like his game, it's just a change of occasion, a utility, and the frequency of use, nothing has changed, he still plays the game, he has been, has always been busy, and there is no end.

Zhuang Ya suddenly felt that she should stay together at the beginning of the cold, she was always busy, whether she was pregnant or post-pregnancy, she had been breaking down, and it was she who was crying, no matter whether this man was holding her or not, she had a certain feeling of wanting to burst into tears.

And he, as if he had been staying out of it.

Zhuang Ya stood beside him, aggravated, and the strength of his footing seemed to be some kind of deliberate reminder, but there was no reminder from ordinary people.

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