'Are you married or not?' the phrase played in my ears like a spell, over and over again.

I know I'm a bastard, and I've failed to do my duty as a fiancé during this time. I also knew that Yi Xin was qualified to talk to me like this, but I was still annoyed, and there was even a moment when the phrase 'no knot' was on my lips.

But in the end, I didn't say it.

I saw a hint of nervousness in Ishin's eyes, she was obviously still angry, but she seemed to be more afraid of some of the words that came out of my mouth.

For example, the 'no end' that I didn't say.

I suddenly began to wonder—

'Am I really worth it to worry about losing me even if I'm angry?'

I don't understand how such an incompetent fiancé can make her so tolerant and make her care about me so much even when she is angry.

My mind was in a mess, and even I was asking myself, 'Is this knot or not?'

And to my surprise, I found that the answer was yes, I wanted to marry Ishin, even if there were still too many puzzles to solve, even though I knew that maybe she was also a real illusion.

But I love her.

I ran away because of what happened during this time, but I only realized today that I never wanted to break up with Yixin, not marry her, and in my subconscious I actually loved her.

The affirmative answer in my heart made me shake my mind and my expression numb.

Ishin couldn't see the slightest feedback in my expression that she was looking for.

Maybe it's to give in with her, or maybe it's to sit down with her and discuss the matter of marriage.

But I was expressionless, and I froze there, like a stake nailed to the ground.

"Chen Ye ......" Yi Xin's eyes were filled with mist, but I was too immersed in my own world to take care of it.

My lack of response finally made Yi Xin unable to help it, and she asked me with a crying voice: "Gu Chenye, do you love me?"

Her tears are like glass, showing a colorful and surprising beauty under the refraction of light.

'Do you really love me?'

From the day I started dreaming of Ha Yeon, I was like a balloon that was constantly inflated, my brain gradually swelled, began to swell and pain, and in the end, it was about to explode.

And this sentence is the thorn that punctured the balloon.

The moment she said it, my brain was buzzing, and all the emotions "boomed" and completely exploded.

My doubts, pains, struggles, depression, hardships and other emotions these days have an outlet at this moment, and my brain is pouring out.

I looked at Yi Xin with a hint of hurt in my eyes: "It's been so long, don't you know if I love you or not?" I reached out and pulled a few pieces of paper from the carton next to me and handed them to Yi Xin.

"Gu Chenye, do you love me now?" Yi Xin stubbornly blocked it with his hand, didn't take it, and wiped his tears with a few sheets: "We are going to get married next month, and you don't care about the wedding at all, I actually don't want you to do anything, I just hope you can care a little bit about it, but you don't." Yesterday you tried on the dress, you were late, and today I asked you about the list of guests, and you can only avoid or escape. Do you really love me?"

Ishin was right, she had done the best she could, and I had gone too far in that regard. But what about the rest? Does she really love me? If she loves me, why is she always lying to me, if she loves me, why is she erasing my past with everyone around her.

"Then do you really love me?" In this mood, there was a bit of sarcasm in my tone: "If you really love me, why do you lie to me along with those people around you? If you really love me, why do you erase all my past?"

"Yixin, I just want to know the truth, do you know how I've been these days? I dream every night, I have dreams about Xia Yan, those dreams are so real that I can't convince myself that they are fake, so real that my emotions are completely immersed in it, and my clothes are soaked when I wake up. I looked into Ishin's eyes and said seriously.

"I don't want to do this either, I also want to marry you without psychological burden and live our new life. I don't know how much you know about my past, but I know you've been hiding it from me. I want to know what happened to my past, what is the story between me and Xia Yan, is Xia Yan still alive? If she is still alive, then where is she now? Why does even my brother Xiao Jun have to hide my relationship with Xia Yan? And why is the turquoise notebook of Xia Yan that Xiao Jun gave me missing? These questions really drive me crazy, can you save me, tell me. "I poured out the questions that had been building up in my mind these days.

"Chen Ye......" The red look of my eyes scared Yi Xin, and her eyes were full of worry about me.

"Yixin, can you tell me everything you know about my past, I really can't accept that I don't have a past. I don't even know if what I'm going through right now is real or not, and your concealment makes me feel like a clown, kept in the dark, played by life. ”

"Chen Ye...... Have you been stressed out lately?" Ishin tried to reassure me, but didn't intend to tell me what I wanted to hear.

"Yixin, do you ask me if I really love you? I want to say, I really love you, I asked my heart, I love you. But I also want to know the truth of the past, do you understand? I don't want to start a family with you with uncertain guilt and an unknown past, please think about it, can you accept a husband who is forever burdened with guilt and is worried about his past?"

"Tatsuye......"

"Do you know Xia Yan, right?" I asked Yi Xin, and after watching her expression change, my tone changed to affirmation, "I even have a good relationship with her." ”

Ishin looked away, didn't look at me, didn't answer.

She walked to the sofa and picked up her bag: "Chen Ye, you've been too tired lately, and I'm also in a bad mood because of the wedding, let's calm down." ”

"You answer me!" I stood still, watching Ishin's back as he walked out.

Her back paused as she walked out, and after only a second, she continued to walk forward, opened the door to my house, and left.

She still didn't answer me, but I already knew the answer in my heart.

It turns out that I am really a fool and have been deceived by the people around me.