As for why I left Zhao Yilun and why I didn't wait for my dad to pick me up, I took everything for granted. I said that Zhao Yilun didn't like me at all, he was only with me for fun, and he didn't want to stay and take care of me, but he didn't want to be judged.

Listen, how annoying this reason sounds, no matter how broad-minded my dad is, he won't tolerate me and Zhao Yilun being together anymore. He jumped to his feet in anger, picked up the cloth handle with the pestle on the wall, his eyes widened angrily, and he shouted as if he was about to eat people: "I have to teach that bastard a lesson, see what he can do, dare to dump my daughter!"

I said that I was also so heartbroken, as if my life had been ruined by Zhao Yilun, "I don't want to see him anymore, I don't want to at all, everything is his fault, if he hadn't been pestering that woman and didn't stay with me, would I have chased the thief alone?"

I told myself in my heart that it wasn't his fault, I knew it. It's not his fault.

In order to round a lie, I had to tell more lies to make it look as seamless as the truth. And what's even more tragic is that from now on, I can only live in lies.

For the next three days, the only thing I did was to hold on to my newly purchased phone and wait for news from the policewoman. I became so sensitive that even if the screen lit up, I had to pick it up immediately, for fear of missing a moment.

My stepmother often came into my room and reminded me to open the window for ventilation and bring a change of clothes. As soon as I heard that I was nosy, I was hurt, and I had to count them down once I came.

She pushed open the window and saw me sitting on the floor, and she sat down cross-legged and handed me a freshly washed apple.

"You kid is fine, go out for a walk, don't stay at home, it's boring. "I'm just like a kid who only knows how to do homework seriously and doesn't know how to go out to play, old-fashioned and sluggish.

She began to count me down on what she had said a few days ago, and I couldn't help but feel annoyed after listening to it too much. I waved my hand, and she continued to herself.

She said she remembered me when I was a child, the year my grandfather died when I was in sixth grade.

"That's how tall she was then," she said, "she grew so fast, and in a blink of an eye, she became a big girl." ”

"yes, that's fast. I replied to her. My heart fluttered on the string of wind chimes hanging on the balcony.

"At that time, your grandfather had cancer, and he was about to die, so I had to wait until you came back, met him, and asked how many people had taken the exam? Your father lied and said that our little cocoa is very good, and this time he was in the top three in the exam. When he heard this, he departed. ”

My mind was pulled back to the winter when I was thirteen years old, and the mountains were cold and the water was cold, just like my grandfather's body. When I was a child, he often hugged me, a pitiful one, poor our family Xiaoke, since I was a child, I didn't have a mother, grandpa loved you, we don't have to come back.

"I miss my grandfather. ”

Tears somehow crawled all over her cheeks disobediently.

"Then go out for a walk, you are so bored at home and don't speak, when will it be okay? When it doesn't rain the day after tomorrow, you go and sweep your grandfather's grave and see your grandmother." ”

She handed me a wad of tissues, and there was not much love in her eyes. But we have feelings, and after ten years of getting along, except for those unpleasant quarrels, even if I say that I don't like her the most, but I hate her, I can't stick to it.

After so many years, I didn't treat her as family, and I don't know what kind of feelings she has for me. But I don't dare to look forward to it, thinking about the person I have been waiting for for fourteen years, how dare I look forward to it?

When the door closes, the wind chimes on the balcony ring intermittently, making people sleepy, but unwilling to sleep.

In the evening, it was raining lightly, so I listened to my stepmother and followed her out to buy groceries. Stepping on the potholed concrete road, she walked very fast, and I inevitably stepped in the water in order to keep up with her. She inevitably complained about the weather and turned to me, saying that I shouldn't have come out in a white dress, that it was from the muddy water, and that it was difficult to wash it.

It was so stuffy in the supermarket that I didn't stay in for five minutes and somehow felt like throwing up, and my stepmother pushed me out to get some air.

After the nausea subsided, the whole body was left with cold. I huddled in the corner and waited to get my groceries and cook home. Think about what I just said in the room, I want to see my grandmother, then I have to buy a ticket a day in advance, call my grandmother, and ask her to pick me up, it's been too long, I can't remember the way.

And the easel in the room has been used for a long time, and when my brother comes back in the evening, he will blackmail him and ask my father to buy paints, and he himself said that I should draw a picture of the extremely vulgar lucky stars and hang it in the living room......

...... What else can I think about? What else can I think of? I have to think of something, I can't stop.

"Excuse me, let me pass. ”

Someone was talking, a familiar voice. I looked up and made eye contact with the man. My heart missed a beat, and for a short moment, my heart was full of mixed tastes, joy, and sorrow.

Zhao Yilun, he's here.

He's coming, where should I hide...... How could he come?

He was dressed in black, his nylon jacket was dripping with water, his hair was soaked, his eyes were full of exhaustion, and even a little angry.

He's so close to me, what should I say? I don't want you to delay you leaving? Or should I be more thorough and say that I hate him, and that if he had stayed by my side in the first place, it wouldn't have been like this.

In the end, I didn't say anything.

He stepped forward and took me into his arms. The ground was so tight that it became difficult for me to breathe.

I pushed him so hard that I couldn't do anything. Right now...... What is this?

"Zhao Yilun, you let go of me, you strangled me, it hurts, let go, you let go!"

"Didn't I say, when I am discharged from the hospital, you can leave, don't worry about me anymore!"

"What are you doing now, it seems that I am too pitiful, and I have to find someone to comfort and comfort me in order to live? Or do you think that I have no one to want, and compassion is overflowing, and good people do it to the end?"

He hugged me tighter, buried his head in my neck, and said in a pitiful low voice, "It's not as complicated as you think, it's just ...... Missed you. ”

"I miss you. ”

I thought I was ready not to accept anyone, but he simply spied into the cracks, saying that it was impossible for me not to be soft-hearted.

I miss you too, Zhao Yilun. Su Ke, who still longs to be loved, told me this.

The rain was a little heavier, and I remembered the day when I was whipped in the face with a belt in the dark room.

In a panic, I pushed Zhao Yilun away.

I long for him to like me, I want him to love me, I want all the good things in this world. But I can't just take and take, I have to give. When a person likes you to 100 percent, what right do you have to pay only 50 percent for him?

In fact, I can't even reach for this fifty percent, and I've lost the expectation of a person, or rather, of myself.