On October 5, 2016, because of some things, I talked to Judy and Ender about my first love. A few days later, when I was chatting with her, I accidentally talked about this topic as well. She said she would love to hear my previous story.

It was an incredibly long story, so long that even a rough one could take hours. I didn't want to say it, but in the end, I took screenshots of their conversations with Judy and sent them to her one by one.

Brother, you're so stupid. That was the first thing she said to me after looking at all the screenshots.

After reading it for so many years, don't you think you're hurting yourself? That was her second sentence.

If you think about it again, if you can't let it go, you have to try to live your own life. Don't live in the shadow of the past, others will not know, only your own pain. She added.

She advised me not to fill my life with unhappy things, and she wanted me to live happily.

On the evening of November 2, 2016, I was chatting with her when suddenly, she said that she was in a bad mood today. I asked why. She said she had a quarrel with her family. I asked why. She said it was because of the money.

After listening to this, my first reaction was that something happened to her family again.

She said: I asked them a question today, whether as long as they have money, it doesn't matter to them whether I live or die.

I was a little confused and asked, "Who are you asking?"

She said, "My brother and they." I told them that I would find a way to make money, even if it was a loan shark, I would not let them pay a penny.

Me: Faint ......

She said, "My dad is on their side, too."

She said: They say that as long as you have money, you can talk about anything.

I asked her: why, why do you owe money?

She said: My family borrowed money, my dad was sick, and now he urgently needs a sum of money for my dad's treatment.

I was speechless.

That's not your business alone, since you have a brother, you should also help!" I said indignantly.

My eldest brother has to repay the mortgage, and my second brother owes hundreds of thousands of dollars for business. She said.

Is my dad important, or is something else important? I was extremely speechless at her two older brothers and felt that they were very inhuman.

They blamed me for everything. Then, my dad was also upset with me, and I didn't know what I was doing wrong. She said: I told them that I couldn't make any money and I wouldn't go home!

Listening to her words, my heart hurt inexplicably. I really don't understand why her family could bear to be so ruthless to a girl.

Sometimes it's really tiring. But he was not willing to give up easily. She said.

Great work. I didn't know how to reply, and it took me a long time to type those three words.

I'm just whining. I don't know who to talk to, but I tell my friends that I'm afraid they'll be worried. She said.

Complaining should still be posted. I say.

She made two smiles and said, "Yes, I just caught you, so I'll vent it."

I sighed. Then, I told her about my family.

I said that my dad's health is not good, and he has grown something in his body, and when it grows again, he will have surgery to get it done. Some time ago, I had another car accident and was hit by an electric car. Yesterday he came home and told me that now after his car accident, his brain is not very good, and sometimes he often forgets things, and he will depend on me in the future. Nowadays, the grandparents are also older......

Every family has a scripture that is difficult to read.

She asked me, "Brother, what are your plans now?"

Not yet, just go to work, write well, and try to find a girlfriend as soon as possible. I say. My grandparents have been worried about them all their lives, and now they are still worried about me, so I can only try to find a girlfriend as soon as possible and bring them back to give them peace of mind.

What about you?, I asked her.

But instead of answering my question, she asked me, "Brother, how are you doing in the hotel now?" plus writing a book, how much income can you earn in a month?

Not too much. I'll tell you the truth.

She was silent for a while, and said: Brother, in fact, I have been really entangled for a long time, I really want to help you, but as a younger sister, I don't know how to help you. There is so much pressure and stuff you are undergoing right now. Although I don't have much ability, I have many friends around me who are bosses, and they have helped me a lot. I don't want to see you continue like this, indulging in your own predicament and not being able to get out.

I was silent for a long time, and I didn't reply to her for a long time.

Suddenly, I asked her, "What do you bosses do?"

She said: It's not fixed. Because when I came here, I told myself that I couldn't go anymore, so I would learn from the different bosses I had here, and then I slowly became friends.

I didn't speak.

After a while, I said: Actually, I have friends here, and I hope I can go over after the year.

If your friend can help you, as a sister, I will definitely support you. I can only blame you for not making you think that I am more reliable than your friends, which is why you want to go to your friends. You don't think you're coming to me, are you?" she said. Although she only sent a text message through WeChat, looking at this word, I could still feel that she was a little angry.

I don't mean that, it's just that because they're all in the same place, and the relationship was good before...... I explained to her, somewhat speechless.

Actually, I've only mentioned one aspect of the reason. As for the other reason, it is not convenient to explain it to her.

And the reason for this is very simple, what she said did not make me trust unreservedly. Because I asked her what she said, she didn't answer at all.

Although it is hot, I have always been addicted to novels, but it is not that I don't read the news and don't know what is happening in the world outside. In today's society, pyramid schemes are rampant, there are more and more scammers, and it is not uncommon for college students to be deceived into pyramid schemes.

It's just that as soon as I said this, not only did I not extinguish the fire in her heart, but instead cooked the oil with fire, which made the fire in her heart more and more vigorous.

She said, "What about me? Am I not even a friend?" Maybe it's because I'm just a sister you know, and that's okay......

I can imagine how strong the anger was in her heart at this point.

That's not what you mean, it's not what you think!" I said.

Small reluctance, big reluctance, reluctance. Brother, you should know very well in your heart that if you continue to stick to this job, it can't be proportional to your hard work. If you're not in a hurry, I'm in a hurry for you. You can't let go, just because you are unwilling, and you are unwilling to waste all your efforts, time and youth.

She paused and continued: "However, if you never dare to break through, you will never have to stand still, and you will never have that courage. If you didn't say that you were going to find a girlfriend to go home and let your parents and grandparents have a little peace of mind, I wouldn't tell you this today, and you would be even more stressed in the future, what should you do at that time, do you continue to wait?

I don't have anything to say, and I admit that what she said still has a point. There are some things that you don't try, how do you know what the result will be?

Let's make a decision at that time, and I'm not in a hurry to find a girlfriend, to be honest, the most urgent thing at the moment is still in the novel. If you don't finish writing your youth, you will become a heart disease, and you can't even let go of the past. And if you can't pass this hurdle in your heart, even if you find a girlfriend, I'm afraid you can only end up with a wordless breakup. I thought about it and said.

I have always respected and supported your choices and decisions, and you know that. It's just that when we are tired and have lost too much, we should reflect on it instead of continuing to blindly hold on. Staying complacent and working behind closed doors will only cost you everything. She said.

Blindly persisting, working behind closed doors, losing everything. Looking at the three words she sent, I couldn't help frowning. Because I don't think that my insistence on fiction is blind insistence, and I don't think that if I concentrate on writing novels, I will lose everything.

My addiction to fiction stems from my love for fiction and, from 2012 to the present, it has benefited me a lot along the way. To say that to focus on it is to see something wrong, and that I can't agree with it.

Brother, think about it yourself. Those were the last words she said to me that night.

However, I didn't expect this to be my last conversation with her. Since then, I have lost contact with her.