The change of his son is like a spring feeling gradually becoming stronger. In the third week of school, he didn't get penalized for his homework, which was a long-lost thing for him! When he finished his homework on Saturday morning, I said happily, "Joy, you've made great progress this week." ”

"What progress, what progress can I have?!" The son asked, confused.

"You didn't get penalized for your homework this week. ”

"What kind of progress is this, it's far worse than other classmates!" The son said embarrassedly.

"Joy, you are here again, we don't compare ourselves with others when we go to school, only with ourselves. If you were to compare, all the students in the school would not have published as many articles in children's magazines across the country, but now you have more than a dozen. ”

"That is, Dad, you say this alone, all the teachers only care about the scores, and no one looks at these things. The son said, "I'll go out for a while." ”

Towards noon, I went out of the house and saw Wang Xile and five or six children playing not far away, and soon he had an argument with a child who was swearing in his mouth. Wang Xile warned the boy that if he swore again, he would not play with him. From Wang Xile's accent, I feel that he is quite authoritative among children. I was trying to see how my son would resolve the dispute, when the child's mother came out of the aisle and said, "What's the big deal if you don't play and don't play." Then he forcibly took the child away. This mother's behavior makes me feel very bitter in my heart, if every parent protects their children like this, the future of this society is too terrible.

Because children's quarrels and even fights are rare opportunities for their growth. In the long history of human beings, when something develops to the level of quarrel, it must be related to morality, and when it develops to the level of fighting, it must be related to the size of interests, and the individual and the country are no exception. However, we have a kind of educational philosophy that adds a very disgraceful definition to these normal things, when we see children arguing, adults often use a kind of view that they don't care about, always feel that their children are arguing with others is a very shameful thing, and always do everything possible to prevent children from experiencing this kind of thing, so that some children basically do not have this experience from childhood to adulthood. However, adults make a mistake here, children's disputes and fights are actually learning to deal with the skills between morality and interests, which is a very important part of children's spiritual development, otherwise they will lack strategies and techniques to solve this problem when they grow up, and they are often too excited and out of line when they encounter disputes.

For children, arguing is the best kind of mental training, and it is also the best practice for thinking about interpersonal relationships in the low-energy and low-danger stage. My son and I often have arguments, most of the time on purpose, I have to do anything to my son must be justified, whether the reason is reasonable or not, as long as it can be clearly explained, I support him to try. If you can't tell me clearly, then I'm sorry, go down and find a reason. Anyway, after the fight is over, and after the peace is over, the child is always trying to persuade the adults, and in the process his confidence in communicating with the adults has been strengthened. The reckless interference of adults in children's quarrels is actually a change of direction to isolate children from real life, which is extremely detrimental to shaping character.

At lunch, I asked my son what the argument was about, and he said that the child was talking too dirty and didn't want to play with him, so he quarreled. I said, "You should be noisy if you do the right thing, and no one wants to play with that kid." However, during this time, I saw you playing with children in groups, why haven't I seen a group of friends playing games with you for so long?"

"Who has the guts since last year's exams. Don't talk about this question in the future, let the teacher know and don't approve me. ”

After listening to the child's words, I shook my head and began to eat.

Immediately after Monday noon, my son took back the Chinese and mathematics unit exam papers, and when I saw that I had scored more than 70 points in both subjects, I casually said, "Joy, is it really so difficult to study?" ”

I was just talking casually, but I didn't expect my son to squat on the ground and cry "woo-woo". I was taken aback and felt his heart struck. I hurriedly got up from my chair and walked over to pull him up from the ground. I've never seen my son cry so sadly. He said, "Dad, I've worked so hard! I don't know how I did it, I can't do it once I take the exam!"

"Joy, it's Daddy who is wrong. It is very good to score more than 70 points in both Chinese and mathematics. Dad wanted to say why it was so difficult for you to overcome your carelessness, but he didn't make it clear. "I try to be at peace with my son.

This is the first time since Wang Xile went to school that he is so sensitive to learning issues, and I am mistaken. My wife came over and put her arms around his neck and went into the back room, looking at their backs, I strongly felt that my son's self-esteem was being tortured, and how to make my son face the ups and downs of his test scores in the future and have the psychological quality of being calm is the most urgent task in front of me. If you want to accomplish this daunting task, find a way to turn superficial physical exercise into a physical life.

When he came back from school in the afternoon, his son said that he was going to participate in the intensive learning class run by Mr. Liu. I felt guilty and thought to myself: what I said at noon hurt my son's heart too much. I said in a tone of self-reproach, "Joy, why do you suddenly want to go to the intensive class, don't you like to go the most? Did Dad break your heart at noon?"

"Not really. ”

"Why is that?"

"The students in my class are all studying in the intensive class, but I am not alone, I feel very lonely, and the teacher's attitude towards the students who participate in the study class is good. ”

"I see. "Alas!" I lamented in my heart, "no one can face the challenges of the environment alone." ”

Although the whole country is talking about the need to carry out quality education, there is still a long, long way to go if teachers want to have the quality to carry out quality education. I said helplessly, "Joy, you have emotions now, and it takes three days to think about whether or not to go to the intensive class." Now Dad has something he wants to discuss with you. ”

"What's the matter?"

"Can you come to middle school every afternoon after school like a while ago, train with those big brothers for a while, it's almost a game, they can be lively?"

"No, I can't. ”

"Why?"

"Now that the weather is warmer, I'm still playing with the kids. ”

"I have no objection to you playing, as long as you come twice a week. ”

"Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday are definitely not good days for playing games, and Monday is not good for our children to exchange and play hearts, so it can only be Tuesday and Thursday afternoons, and I may go later. ”

"Okay. Daddy is waiting for you. See you or leave you. ”

The next afternoon, I saw a "Notice of the National 10,000 Schools Essay Contest" in a magazine, and I showed it to my son and asked him to write an essay to participate in the competition. The son said, "Daddy, what am I going to write?"

"Joy, sit quietly at the table for a while, and write whatever is most disturbing. ”

In the evening, my heart was shaken when my son asked me to read his essay, which read:

"Time flies so fast, the annoying weekend is here again, and this reinforcement class has just finished and rushed to the next reinforcement class, which is really annoying. "My friends often say that to me. All this made my friends panic about studying. Kang Youwei, a modern Chinese educator, once said: "Children and teenagers are not full of brain qi and their bodies are still weak. "Don't teachers and parents know anything about this?

In the past, human beings were deeply confused in the dense space space. A thousand years later, the La Sila Observatory in France, facing the North Star, after 4 hours of time-lapse exposure shooting, found that all the stars in the universe are rotating around a center along a 60-degree arc trajectory, making the chaotic space suddenly become a beautiful and neat picture. This shows that there is a time process for everything to do. Why don't we children have this time process for learning? Why do we say that we can't do this or that we can't do it when we don't get a high score in the exam? Have we passed the test of time?

My friend said that every time he rushed to school, he always thought that God would change his parents, maybe they wouldn't do that to him. Why do parents always like to say: "Child, now that society has changed, if you don't study like this, you will be eliminated, it's really annoying." ”

Times have changed, but I want to know if this change has changed for the better or worse for us primary school students? Could it be that the times have changed, and children have no time to play? Teachers and parents often say that we are the eagles of the future, but my friends often say that they don't know what can make them fly. If parents can consider the problem from the perspective of children, they may be able to understand our suffering!

As I watched and rewrote the article for my son, I realized that my past conversations with him were influencing his thinking. I was puzzled and asked, "How can you write this topic without going to the intensive class?"

"Alas, my classmates tell me this every day. ”

On the third day, Wang Lexi told me that he had decided to go to an intensive Chinese learning class this weekend. "Alas, the power of circumstance is too great!" I said in my heart.