The word "soon" often has different meanings for men and women. When a man is doing certain exercises, once he says it is fast, it basically means that he will pay the goods immediately within five seconds. And when a woman is putting on makeup, she talks about it quickly, which often means that she has to wait for at least half an hour.

At this moment, Wang Fatzi is like a woman putting on makeup, saying that she is fast, but the result is full of suffering. Wang Fat Man was the same, squatting at the door alone, bowing his head, secretly sobbing, sobbing until the sunset, and still squatting there, snoring and sobbing at the same time.

In the end, it was Chen Pifu who shouted: "Fatty, it's time for dinner, it's braised pork to eat at night, if you don't come again, Lao Jia will have to swallow it all." ”

Wang Fatzi immediately woke up from his deep sleep and cried, and ran over.

At the dinner table, Chen Pifu relayed Ye Yun's opinion, and then asked the fat man: "What do you mean?"

"Me?" asked the fat man as he stuffed the braised pork into his mouth, "Why do you want to ask me?"

"Hey, after all, you're the child's father, oh no, it's the child's mother, legally speaking, you are his first guardian, and we have to ask for your opinion anyway." ”

"Boss, don't be kidding. ”

"Hey, as the saying goes, if you have milk, you are a mother, or in the animal kingdom, animals generally regard what they see at first sight as their relatives. In every sense of the word, that fat boy is your son. ”

Wang Fatzi suddenly fell completely silent, indeed, for an otaku whose girlfriend doesn't know where to reincarnate, you suddenly tell him that he is going to be a mother, this kind of blow is like a thunderbolt from the blue. Whoever it is, I can't accept it all at once. You must know that most male compatriots, when they are at the age of Wang Fatzi, often only care about the manufacturing process in the middle of giving birth, and they are not very looking forward to the results, but now, Wang Fatzi has completely omitted the manufacturing process and directly produced the result, which is absolutely fatal to Wang Fatzi's heart.

Wang Fatzi was silent for a long time before muttering: "Boss, if you report this kid to the Abnormal Investigation Bureau, do you think he will have a good time?"

"Safety should be guaranteed, and it's hard to say that you are happy. Caged bird, when do you feel free?"

"Then let's not report it, this kid is also a miserable fate, if it becomes the fate of being studied, it is really too cruel. Wang Fatzi looked up at Chen Pifu very seriously, his eyes were full of determination: "Boss, the child is innocent." ”

"However, if you don't report it, it will be very troublesome. ”

"What about you...... What the hell do you want?"

"Oh, fatty, what's the matter with your sudden Taiwanese cavity?"

"Uh...... Boss, people just want to set off the atmosphere. ”

"If this kid is not lost to the bureau, then all the things he will do in the future will be handed over to you to be responsible, is there a problem?"

Wang Fatzi put down the bowl and looked at the fat doll sleeping on the coffee table, for a while, a heavy sense of responsibility arose, and Wang Fatzi nodded heavily: "Well, don't worry, boss." I think I can try. ”

"Okay, that's it. Chen Pifu waved his hand and made a decision.

Ye Yun also nodded, after all, if this child was sent to the bureau, it would be too pitiful, and Ye Yun himself felt unbearable.

After everyone just got the result, the fat doll suddenly woke up, one stood up, sat up, did not cry or make trouble, a pair of big eyes swept around on everyone's face, and finally fell on the face of the fat man, the big eyes suddenly lit up, the whole body shrunk into a ball, a catapult, fell into the arms of the fat man, shouted: "Mom!"

Wang Fatzi was finally prepared this time, and before the fat doll could bite his chest, he stuffed the gourd that had been prepared for a long time into his mouth.

The fat doll immediately drank "coo-dong".

While feeding, Wang Fatzi induced: "Call Dad." ”

The fat doll is not a product of genetic modification, the IQ is obviously extremely high, and he has been taught by Wang Fatzi a few times, and he really has to call Wang Fatzi Dad. Now, the fat man is happy, and the pair of little eyes are almost gone.

Everyone is also surprised, on the first day of birth, he will speak, and he will call Dad, which has obviously subverted everyone's common sense, but everyone here is not good at stubble, oh no, it should be said that they are all good men who go south and north, obviously they will not be frightened by this kind of trivial matter, but they are all amazed, and they feel that it is not a bad thing for children to be smart, at least it will be much easier to educate in the future.

Chen Pifu looked at the fat doll holding the gourd, drinking it fragrantly, and couldn't help but feel a little pity, and said softly to the fat man on the side: "Always let the child drink the water in the toilet, it's not a way, tomorrow morning you and Da Zhuang go to the supermarket, buy more milk powder and come back, and the nutrition will keep up." ”

"Mmmm!" the fat man nodded desperately.

"Shall we give this kid a name?"

"Name?"

"Nonsense, how can you get a hukou without a name, fortunately, we still have someone in the public security bureau, otherwise there is suddenly such a child, and I don't even know how to get a hukou. ”

"Oh, yes, yes!" Wang Fat looked at the fat doll in his arms, raised his head and said: "My surname is Wang, this child must have my surname, I have six sisters, I am the seventh in the family, even if this child is the eighth, plus he is out of the egg, boss, otherwise, we will call him the bastard?"

"......" the crowd.

Jia Daochang reminded on the side: "Fatty, are you sure that when your son becomes sensible, he will not kill his relatives and dismantle you in eight pieces?"

"Uh, so what good advice do you have?"

Chen Pifu lit a cigarette, pondered, and finally his eyes lit up: "This child was born in our family, and he likes to drink water in the bathroom, why don't we call him Wong Kar-wai?"

"......" the crowd.

In the end, Lao Jia proposed: "According to the poor Dao, this kid is definitely extraordinary, of course, just because he is with us, it can be a good illustration of this." In order to show our hope for his future, why don't we call him King Ghis Khan?"

"Get out!"

In the end, everyone discussed for half an hour, from the Four Books to the Five Classics, from Qimen to Dunjia, from celebrities to gossip, but they didn't come up with a result. Everyone looked distressed: Why is it so difficult to name a child these days?

In the end, it was Wang Fatzi who made the final decision: "Why does it need to be so complicated, anyway, this child was born in an egg, let's just call him Wang Dandan." ”

When Chen Pifu heard it, "King Dandan, playing Dandan, Finishing, Hey, it seems to be a little interesting." ”

So, this poor child, the most important name in his life, was so hastily decided by these unconscious sluts.

...........................

In the following days, Wang Fatzi entered the mode of bringing a baby.

Seven days later, in the morning, Chen Pifu just got up, hit Hache, as soon as he pushed open the door, he saw Wang Fatzi holding a kitchen knife high, Da Zhuang wanted to take the knife off the side, Jia Daochang was holding the balls, hiding far away, even Mr. Zhu, who had been practicing in the painting recently, climbed out, hugged Wang Fatzi's thigh, and begged bitterly.

Chen Pifu asked curiously, "What are you making this morning?"

Jia Daochang shouted on the side: "Fatty, calm down." ”

Wang Fatzi held the kitchen knife high and roared angrily: "Get out of the way, I won't teach him a hard lesson today, and he will have it when he grows up in the future." ”

Mr. Zhu hugged Wang Fatzi's thigh tightly: "He is still a child." ”

"Fart, the son is not the godfather's fault. ”

"......" Chen Pifu looked at Da Zhuang: "What's wrong?"

After Da Zhuang's explanation, Chen Pifu understood what happened. It turns out that these days, a special talent in Dandan's body has gradually awakened, that is, he can eat, not ordinary eat, but very eaten. At the beginning, Dan Dan could drink the water in the gourd, but in the past two days, water and milk can no longer meet his needs, and now Dan Dan likes to eat, especially meat. And the amount of food is as large as that of Wang Fatzi. In the past two days, Wang Fatzi's meal has shrunk significantly, and he was already full of resentment, but this morning, when Wang Fatzi got up and went to wash his face, Dandan took the opportunity to put the xiaolongbao, fritters, and pancakes that Da Zhuang bought in the morning...... All the breakfast, all swept away. As a result, Wang Fatzi completely broke out.

"Hey!" Chen Pifu lit a cigarette for himself: "I thought it was a big deal, what's the matter, fat man, a few days ago you shouted that the child was innocent, and now you are ready to kill your relatives in righteousness?"

"Boss...... Woowoo...... If this continues, I will starve to death. ”

"Alright, alright, what's the matter! Chen Pifu made a final decision: "Da Zhuang, the food in the store will be doubled in the future." Meat, something, well-prepared, we're not short of money, understand?"

"Understood, Boss. ”

"Oh yes!" When Wang Fatzi heard this, he immediately threw away the kitchen knife in his hand and high-fived Jia Daochang.

Dandan also had a smile on his face, and shouted desperately in his mouth, "Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!"

It's strange to say, as soon as Dandan was born, he would speak, which shocked everyone. But after a few days, the amount of food has increased, but this IQ feels obviously degraded, and he used to say two other words, such as mom and the like, but now no matter how everyone teaches, he will only call the word dad. Now everyone is judging what he wants to express by looking at the tone in which he calls his father.

For example, this time, this dad dad dad shouted quickly and excitedly. That means he's happy.

Chen Pifu touched Dandan's bald head: "Okay, your father is the fat man, I know that you are happy, don't worry, follow us, you won't be hungry." ”

Chen Pifu flicked the cigarette ash, saw Mr. Zhu, who he hadn't seen for a long time, and said hello: "Old Zhu, why haven't you climbed out for a long time, and you haven't gone to the big health care with the fat man, you have been cultivating yourself recently?"

Mr. Zhu glanced at Chen Pifu's room and thought: You hide in your room every day to cultivate, and there is that girl in your room, I don't dare to climb in. How did you meet me?

However, thinking of the girl's warning, Mr. Zhu couldn't tell Chen Pifuming that he could only explain: "These days, I have felt the magic power of the wood system in the painting, no, now it is a little small, so I climbed out to breathe." ”

Chen Pifu nodded, just about to say something. I heard a "ding dong" prompt sound on my mobile phone.

"Huh?" Chen Pifu looked at the avatar on WeChat and said to himself: "How can this girl have time to find me?"